As I look back on my 65 years, to say that my life did not turn out the way I expected would be an understatement. I wonder how many of us would be honest enough to say the same.

Idealism

I approached both marriage and motherhood with incredible idealism. I was sure I would have the greatest marriage and my kids would rise up and call me blessed (Proverbs 31:28). Now, all these decades later, I am grateful that they at least speak to me – on occasion.

I believed my marriage would last ’til death do us part. Our children would bless us with grandchildren and they would all come home for Sunday dinners.

The way it turned out? I can’t say I ever imagined the realistic side of life. I do have one grandchild, but he is being raised by his father and the grandmother on his paternal side.

Because I never thought I would have kids (secondary infertility), I cherished the idea of motherhood and even called it my “divine appointment.” I have mostly adopted kids who I mostly homeschooled.

Homeschooling Reflections

Being a Christian homeschooling mom is a lot of pressure. We strive for perfect marriages and perfect children, but life doesn’t always cooperate.

Homeschooling moms compare themselves and measure their worth by how well their family is managed. The goal is to turn out perfect little human beings. Even though I was a very active member of that community, writing books and speaking at homeschool conventions, when my family started to experience issues and problems, that same community shunned me.

Responding to Pressure

Aspiring to have a perfect family life and a perfect marriage puts you under a lot of pressure.

My first clue that the pressure was killing me was when I landed in a 3-week inpatient program for depression. At that time, my then husband had been diagnosed with cancer and was quite ill. Some of the issues of my children were beginning to surface. The future did not look bright. In fact, it looked dreadful.

Self-sabotage?

My therapy process caused me to examine my patterns of sabotage. No marriage is perfect and no children are perfect. We are all imperfect people. Unfortunately, it takes time to realize this.

Sometimes dedication to children and family can lead to an unhealthy dependence on them. When they struggled, I died a little inside. My flaw was my inability to let go to allow them to try and fail, to fly high and crash hard. My attempts to fix people and make them happy were misguided… and sad.

Identity

Another factor leading to my disillusionment had to do with defining my identity. My identity as a mom was so tied up in the drama of family life that I lost myself.

While juggling the issues of many children with many issues, the marriage died a little with each crisis we faced. Could we have done it differently? Some couples survive great tragedy. Others fold into their own bitterness and disappointment.

Family therapy could have probably helped had we chosen it early on, but we didn’t. We still have disagreements about how to handle things with the now grown children.

The kids grew up and on. The marriage failed. Shared struggle failed to knit us together. The statistics for marriage survival for couples facing the issues we faced are grim. Only the strongest can survive the major challenges we faced, and we turned out average.

What Will I Remember?

I will cherish the good times, the laughter of children, the loyalty of a good spouse. I will cherish the growth in wisdom and patience that blessed my challenges.

I will forever remain grateful for the many miracles of my life – the arrival of children, the many fun experiences we had together, the growth we all experienced because of the crucible of family life.

Through the tears and the pain, the doubts and the uncertainty – it was worth it and I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’m marriage and motherhood survivor. I’m still standing and I’m OK.

Has your life turned out the way you thought it would? Have your experiences prepared you for this time in your life? Are you able to look back and see blessings? Let’s swap stories!

My mother never made it to 60, sadly passing away just two weeks after her 59th birthday. At 21, however, I viewed her as an old lady.

God bless her, but she didn’t dye her hair, although she occasionally had a blue rinse, didn’t wear makeup, had bunions so wore sensible shoes and wore crimplene dresses usually bought at C&A, but only when she needed them.

Jump forward 44 years. As I approach my 70th birthday, times for us seniors have certainly changed.

Our Throw-Away Culture

Mum lived through the austere years when makeup was scarce and nylons non-existent, we have lived with more excess than our parents could ever have dreamed of.

Makeup is no longer a luxury, tights are available in every colour, size and pattern under the sun, and clothes are throw-away, disposable items.

A memory just popped up while I was writing this. My mother told me how they used to draw the ‘seam’ of fully fashioned nylons onto the backs of their legs with gravy powder to give the impression they were wearing stockings!

How different it is for us now.

My 27-year-old daughter and I borrow each other’s clothes. This is something I would never have done with my mum.

I buy clothes most months, and I know I have more than I can ever wear for the rest of my life. And shoes? Well shoes are one of my passions in life. I currently have more than 200 pairs, and I know that is really excessive so please don’t criticise me – I know!!!

Mum had about five pairs of shoes and a couple of handbags – one for summer and one for winter.

Leisure Has Changed

The point I wanted to make is not about the excesses of modern life, but about the kind of lives we lead. Mum went to a keep-fit class and bingo, and after my dad died, that was her life. She never learned to drive, so apart from when we went out together, she never really went anywhere else.

My father served his country as a member of the armed forces, so we moved around a lot during my childhood. That meant Mum never had the opportunity for a career, since we followed Dad wherever he was posted, but she was always home when I got in from school, so we could chat about our day.

I learned to drive at 17 and had an interesting and varied career. I think that has made a huge difference to us, bringing mobile and financial independence. I’m not just talking about purchases though. Now we have the freedom to make choices our parents never did.

Changes in education and in the workplace have given women more opportunities, and I think that makes a huge difference to women of today – though it’s fair to say that there is still much to be done on the subject of equal pay.

Homes and Housework

My parents – and theirs before them – never owned their own homes, since rented accommodation was provided for Forces families. As I sit in my own comfortable home, I thank them for my small inheritance which set us on the road to home-ownership.

We certainly have more leisure time than they did. Washdays lasted a couple of days – from doing the washing in a small twin tub, getting it dry and then doing the ironing… it took forever.

Even before then, I remember Grandma washing by hand in a tin tub and wringing them out with a mangle!

Food was always home-cooked from scratch and watched over all day – meat and potato pie, stew and dumplings and roast dinners took forever to cook. There were no slow cookers, microwaves or pressure cookers, acti-fries or blenders in those days.

And cleaning never stopped! My mother dusted and vacuumed every day and washing up was done in the sink after every meal – no dishwashers for them.

We did have a very small fridge, but food shopping was done most days to ensure freshness, rather than doing a weekly shop. Fortunately, our ‘supermarket’ was the local NAAFI shop so we didn’t have to walk far with our purchases.

Times were much simpler then, and I’m thankful I had such a happy, carefree childhood. Playing in the fields around our married quarters (airfields were always in the country), riding my bike and going to ballet classes were much healthier than sitting in front of a television or iPad playing digital games.

I had lots of friends and plenty of fresh air. I walked a mile to school which kept me healthy and not overweight.

Holidays – when we could afford them – were a week by the sea, paddling in the water, building sandcastles and eating ice cream. And I know some of those simple pleasures remain.

I remember asking my daughter – then aged about nine – which she enjoyed most: our annual family holiday in Greece or our week in a cottage near Whitby with my best friend and her daughter. Guess which she preferred?

So which times are/were the best? Computers and the internet have changed both our working and leisure lives. We have a pandemic now, but there were other threats back then as well. Labour-saving devices have cut down on manual housework, but do we have a better life than our parents?

What hasn’t changed, however, is families. We love our children and grandchildren, and however much time we had then or now, this has to remain a priority. What do you think?

Is life better now than being in the 50s and 60s? What do you miss about times gone by? If you could change one thing about modern life, what would it be? Let’s share some happy memories!

Crystal Kung Minkoff’s Favorite Lip Glosses on Instastories

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Instagram Beauty 2021

In case you missed it, Crystal Kung Minkoff took to her Instastories the other day to answer a hard-hitting question we’d all love to know: did Erika know or not what her favorite lip glosses are. And we’re going to assume that under the unwritten laws of Instagram Q & A’s, she didn’t decide to gloss over the truth*.

Fashionably,

Faryn

*  Sorry Rinna, we stole your line.

Click Here to Shop Her Nude Envie Lip Gloss in ‘Affection’ and More Colors

Click Here For Additional Stock

Click Here to Shop Her Jouer ‘Gloss Babe’ Bundle

Note: Crystal tagged Nude Envie and Jouer in the above photos from her IG page (we’re not 100% sure which gloss shades she has on in them though).

Photos & Info: @CrystalKungMinkoff

Originally posted at: Crystal Kung Minkoff’s Favorite Lip Glosses

After more than 18 months at home, finally, celebrities are getting out to parties and premieres, dressing up and giving us all the beauty inspo. It’s an especially good time to drool over fall hair trends for 2021 to try throughout the season and beyond, especially now that temperatures are falling and folks are getting into the fall spirit.

The best part? Most of these hairstyles, cuts and colors are totally do-able with a little patience and maybe some time a the salon. Whether you’re able to get to a salon or you’re still DIYing at home, these looks are surprisingly easy. One reason? This season is all about embracing your individuality. Embrace your hair texture, go with the frizz — it all works. Play around with ponytails, too, or just go for a big chop with a bob or short bangs. All you need is confidence and you’ve already embraced the season’s biggest trend.

We chatted with hairstylist Chris Appleton for his takes on the season’s hot styles. Considering he’s responsible for the mane of Kim Kardashian and Jennifer Lopez, we trust him. With his favorite styles and celebs’ top color trends, there are seven very clear frontrunners we’re starting to see everywhere.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

Source: Instagram

Shades of Red

If it feels like everyone on TikTok is dyeing their hair red, well, there’s a good reason. Folks of all genders are going copper, bright red and auburn just in time for fall’s rich tones. We love Gigi Hadid‘s copper hue that works perfectly with a cute black beanie. Because red hair dye fades so fast, be sure to use a shampoo with color-depositing pigments, such as Joico Color Infuse Shampoo and Conditioner ($33.13 at Amazon).

AP Images.

Big Bows

“Oversized accessories like giant bows are the ultimate way to make a statement for the fall season,” says Appleton. “You can take any style from basic to glam or add it to a ponytail for a perfectly polished look.” Take Hailey Bieber‘s big black bow at the 2019 MET Museum Costume Institute Benefit Gala. In addition to a giant bow a la OG Gossip Girl, Appleton recommends using strong elastic bangs, tons of bobby pins and Color Wow Cult Favorite Hairspray ($24 at Amazon) — he’s a spokesperson for the brand.

AP Images.

Chocolate Brown

When the nights become cool and the leaves start to change, many trade in their highlights for a rich chocolate brown hue. Zendaya’s color is the perfect example of a rich, muti-dimensional shade that looks gorgeous on everyone — especially her. Use a shampoo made for brunette hair, such as John Frieda Brilliant Brunette Shampoo ($8.94 at Amazon) to keep color rich and brass-free.

Andy Kropa/Invision/AP.

Bubble Accent Braids

Lacy Redway is responsible for Tessa Thompson’s cool bubble braid at the New York Special Screening of “Lady and the Tramp.” Appleton sees this as a fall trend. “Although this trend took off in the summer, the foolproof bubble braid will absolutely be a staple this fall as well,” he says. “Simple and easy to achieve, bubble accent braids will spruce up any style and are here to stay.” He recommends using clear elastics and a shine spray like Color Wow Extra Mist-ical Shine Spray ($29 at Amazon).

AP Images.

Gray Hair

This year, celebs such as Andie MacDowell, Jodie Foster and Diane Keaton all embraced the gray. Silvery strands have never felt chicer. Maybe it was the 18 months of quarantine without access to a hair salon but all of a sudden, many decided to stop covering up and started embracing what’s really beautiful. Keep the cool tone brass-free with Philip Kingsley Pure Blonde/Silver Brightening Daily Shampoo ($24.10 at Amazon).

Source: Instagram

Feathered Layers

Late ’90s/early 2000s hair cuts are back with a vengeance. “Feathered layers add a certain edge to any style and works for all hair types,” says Appleton. “Expect to see this style around this fall season as it provides the ultimate glamorous yet soft and bouncy look for everyone.” He likes using Color Wow Xtra Large Volumizer ($26 at Sephora) for height and texture, as well as the Babyliss 1.5” Curling Iron ($59.99 at Amazon) to smooth the ends and give them a nice bend.

Source: Instagram

Chunky Highlights

We’re still going to see folks play with chunky Y2K-style highlights. Just look at killer Cardi B’s hair looks. From money pieces to tons of dimension, the look isn’t going anywhere. And we’re pretty stoked about it. Hair is supposed to be fun, right?

If there’s one thing that everybody says we should do as we get older, it’s to keep our skin moisturized, because the oil glands in our skin just don’t work as they used to. This makes moisturizing a really important, basic thing to do.

So, if you’re on a limited budget, or you don’t want to spend a lot on moisturizer products, I’ve chosen several that I’m going to share with you along with my thoughts on them. I’ll also explain what the manufacturer says makes their product different.

To help you find these products easily, I’ve included links below. These are affiliate links, but I will only ever promote products that I truly believe in.

Banish Dry Skin!

Dry skin can be incredibly frustrating, and although it is more prevalent in winter, many women have to put up with it all year long. It can be problematic to find the right product to combat this condition, as the cause is different from one person to the next.

I moisturize my skin all the time because I think our environment is a little dry. Obviously, drinking lots of water and taking good care of your diet is important, but so is using products that are well made and still very affordable.

All of the products I’m showing you today are under $15. I started using some of them in the past and continue using them today.

My List of Affordable Moisturizers

Here is the list of products I used for this video and article.

Eucerin Advanced Repair Cream

The first one I’d like to share is Eucerin’s Advanced Repair Cream, a product many women in the community use. The cream comes in a huge, 16-ounce tub, all under $15.

This particular product is for advanced repair use and can be applied to the body and face. Eucerin claims that it’s a very good solution for cracked feet and cracked skin, in general. So, if you have super dry skin, Eucerin might be the product to consider.

It’s recommended by dermatologists which gives it a little bit of credibility. The online description says it’s good for winter skin, so if you live in the northern hemisphere, this could be a go-to product. It’s all purpose and fragrance-free. It’s a basic moisturizer that many of you love and recommend.

As a side note, Meghan Markell, who is a very beautiful woman, uses the Eucerin Aquaphor Skin Repairing Balm, which her makeup assistant said she can’t live without. So, Eucerin is a brand that is very well-known, respected, and affordable.

CeraVe Moisturizing Cream

The next product I want to share is by CeraVe. It also comes in a 16-ounce container for under $15, and it’s designed for face and body. This is a very thin moisturizer, but I liked it, and it doesn’t have a scent that I can detect.

The ingredients list includes a couple of things you may not be familiar with: ceramides and hyaluronic acid. Let’s take a pause and explain each of these.

Ceramide is a fat that is naturally found in high concentrations in the uppermost part of your skin. It actually makes up 50% of your skin composition. So, the additional ceramides in your moisturizer nourish your skin with its own wonderful ingredients.

Hyaluronic acid is also really important. It’s like a sponge which absorbs moisture that comes into contact with your skin and keeps it in your skin. That’s why a lot of these skincare products have it as an ingredient.

CeraVe, as an affordable moisturizer, recognizes that and uses it. The product description says, “Moisturizes, restores, and maintains a protective skin barrier.” Obviously, CeraVe is a product we should all consider.

Pond’s Rejuveness Anti-Wrinkle Cream

My third choice brings me back to my childhood. When I was a little girl, I used to sneak into my mother’s bedroom. I’d find her Pond’s cream, which came in a teeny-weeny jar with a gold top, and I’d put it on my face.

Then I would hide it because it was gold dust, and my mom didn’t have a lot of money to spend on cosmetics, so it was valuable to her.

What I have here is Pond’s Rejuveness Anti-Wrinkle Cream. This is a 14-ounce jar of moisturizer that is designed for your face, but I use it all over my body as well. I used to use it to wash my face.

It has a lush and creamy consistency, which I think hasn’t changed over the years. This is a great product for under $15, and I think the line is very reputable. It’s been around for 50-plus years.

This specific moisturizer has an anti-wrinkle effect and is formulated with alpha-hydroxy acids, or AHAs, and collagen. It’s supposed to smooth the appearance of wrinkles on your skin, but I haven’t used this particular product for long enough to say that the claims are true. I do know, however, what Pond’s has done to my skin over the years, so I can say they have been my friend.

Now, let’s look more closely into those alpha-hydroxy acids (AHAs) and collagen, and why it’s good to have them in a skin product.

AHAs are an exfoliation element that, they say, produces fresher and refined skin. Exfoliation is the process that takes off that dead skin layer that we produce all the time, so it can be washed away.

Over time, AHAs give your skin more hydration and make it smoother. That’s what creates the anti-wrinkle effect, and you just have to take that for what it’s worth. The AHAs have also got glycolic acid in them which is the gold standard for hydroxy acids.

Moving on, collagen is an amino acid that our body produces in a large quantity when we’re younger. As we get older, though, our body produces less of it.

What collagen does is, it makes the skin all over your body puffy and full of water, and it fills in the wrinkles in your skin. This is something that Pond’s thinks is important, and I agree.

Neutrogena Hydro Boost Water Gel

The next product is by Neutrogena, and it’s a Hydro Boost Gel Cream for extra dry skin. I do know that a lot of women in our age group and younger have problems with dry skin, so this might be a product to try.

It’s interesting that this cream is almost translucent, though it looks blueish in the jar. It’s super smooth, so it’s more like a gel than a cream, and it goes completely invisible.

This is another product with hyaluronic acid for extra dry skin, and it says it boosts the skin’s natural barrier against moisture loss. A lot of people like the texture too. It’s oil-free, dye-free, and fragrance-free, and it’s from a dermatologist-recommended brand.

Let me add that hyaluronic acid also has the capacity to absorb up to a thousand times its weight in moisture. So, apparently, these little acids are quite active and powerful.

Aveeno Positively Radiant Moisturizer

The fifth product on my list is by Aveeno, another classic line that’s been around for a long time. This one is advertised as a positively radiant daily moisturizer with sunscreen. It’s got SPF-15, so it’s not super protective, but many moisturizers don’t have any SPF, so this is a nice plus.

What’s really unique about this product is that it’s made from soy complex – which is something to be aware of if you don’t like soy products.

It’s an affordable product that you can experiment with. It’s also a rich source of protein and lipids, carbohydrates, and vitamins because of the soy complex. A lot of skin care products now use plant and natural botanical ingredients.

The moisturizer has got a nice floral scent to it, so if you’re looking for a fragrance-free product, Aveeno will not classify. But I do quite like it, and it’s also got a very good rating on Amazon.

TruSkin Daily Facial Moisturizer

The next one is by TruSkin, and this is a company that’s new to me. The product I’m showing you is a daily facial moisturizer with Vitamin C and Vitamin B5. It’s actually been voted on Amazon the best Vitamin C moisturizer cream for the face.

Vitamin C has been shown to have all kinds of wonderful anti-aging effects, and that’s important for toning and firming. This TruSkin moisturizer is supercharged with 15% of Vitamin C, and it’s also got green tea and jojoba oil. So, they use a combination of tea and plant extracts as well, which makes this product really cool.

L’oreal Age Perfect Cell Renewal

I saved my favorite product for last because I think it’s really unique. I’ve used it a couple of times and I love it. It’s L’Oréal’s Age Perfect Cell Renewal. One reason why I like L’Oréal as a brand is their effort to create in their product and marketing strategy a line that deals with older women’s skincare issues and concerns.

Helen Mirren is a spokesperson for L’Oréal. She’s a naturally beautiful woman who’s also an advocate for us women over 60.

So, this is a thick moisturizing cream with cell renewal technology. It’s got an ingredient called lipo hydroxy acid (LHA) which L’Oréal uses in a lot of its products to help with skin flaws like acne and age spots.

They say using this product “makes the skin appear visibly younger,” which is always something I question because I’ve never seen this happen in reality. If healthy skin is what’s making you look great, then I agree.

This moisturizer is also supposed to make your skin healthier. The description says that as the skin matures, it loses its ability to renew the dead skin cells on the surface. This cream helps boost cell renewal, so that’s really useful.

What I find really unique about this moisturizer is the color. It’s pink, and it does give a light pink, glowing quality to the skin. The special ingredient there comes from a Chinese peony plant that has been historically known for its antioxidant and exfoliant powers.

I don’t want to say that L’Oréal is my favorite, although they do a lot of interesting research. I’ll probably keep using their moisturizer because it’s really nice.

Bonus Face Creams for Women Over 60

Let’s take a look at a few other affordable moisturizers that are worth mentioning in this category. I’ve researched a few more face creams for mature skin that are still quite affordable; a little over $15 but under $20.

Olay Total Effects Face Moisturizer + Touch of Foundation

This moisturizer from Olay has an added touch of sheer color to smooth out blemishes and give your skin a soft glow while moisturizing.

L’Oreal Revitalift Moisturizer

Another L’Oréal moisturizer that is worth the mention is the Revitalift face cream with pro-retinol, hyaluronic acid, and vitamin C to firm and brighten the skin.

RoC Multi Correxion 5 in 1 Daily Moisturizer

This RoC daily moisturizer is great if you need the extra protection of SPF 30 while providing moisture.

La Roche-Posay Double Repair Face Moisturizer UV SPF 30

Next on my list is a face moisturizer from La Roche-Posay. The glycerin, essential ceramides, and La Roche-Posay Prebiotic thermal water ingredients help restore the skin’s natural protective barrier. This one also includes an added SPF 30 sun protection factor.

All the products I showed you are great for different reasons, and they’re all affordable – most are under $15, and none is over $20. Try them, see which ones you like, and if you’re using any of them already, please leave a comment below.

What kind of moisturizer do you use? How would you like to try any new ones? What do you look for in a moisturizer? Please tell us in the comments below.