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Why You Should Commit to the Carry-On and Tips for Making it Easy

Why You Should Commit to the Carry-On and Tips for Making it Easy

The world is divided into two different kinds of people: overpackers and underpackers. If you fall into the first category, don’t turn away yet! Give me a few minutes to try and convince you that there is a better way to travel.

As you might already suspect, I am an underpacker. My measure of a packing fail: Coming home with even one thing in my suitcase that I did not need, use or wear during my trip. I do fail sometimes, but not often anymore.

Here’s how to pack lighter – all lessons I learned the hard way.

Start with an Attitude Change

It helps that I don’t really care how I look. I don’t mean I would travel in ripped or dirty clothes. But I don’t need to be the glammed up center of attention. In fact, when you’re traveling, the more you can blend in, the better. You’re less likely to be targeted by pickpockets and local scammers.

Spend a little time researching what the locals wear and try to pack like that. This is the lesson I learned when I wore my electric blue winter coat to Romania, a former Soviet block country where there were two colors of winter coat: grey and black.

So if you simply must be a fashion plate, try to pare down the clothes to a capsule wardrobe of items you can mix and match and pieces that will do double duty.

Use a Packing List

These printable packing lists will give you a feel for the things you’ll need. If the list includes something you don’t think you’ll need, don’t pack it. If there is something missing, make a note on the printed sheet so you don’t forget it.

Check the Weather Forecast

I make this recommendation because I live in Chicago. We like to say, “If you don’t like the weather, wait 10 minutes.” Here, the calendar might say May, but the thermometer might say March. Or July.

So check the forecast for your destination. It will tell you whether to pack a raincoat, sunhat, shorts, or sweaters.

Start Packing Early

If you have a spare bed, room, couch or some other spot to hold the things you want to pack, start a week early and put everything on the bed that you think you might want on your trip.

Then walk away.

Come back the next day and look it over. Is there anything missing? Is there anything you think you might not need on the trip? Make adjustments accordingly.

Then walk away.

Come back the next day with the intention of making choices. If you have two pairs of pants on the bed, take away one pair. If you have four shirts, take away two. And so on, until you have cut in half the things on the bed.

Then walk away.

The next day, it’s time to pack. Start with the pieces of clothing you absolutely MUST have with you.

If you run out of suitcase before you run out of clothes to pack, you get to make a choice: Leave something else behind or pay $40 or more to check a bag.

Buy Packing Cubes

I resisted buying this travel essential for years. Now I can’t believe I ever traveled without them.

Packing cubes are flexible pouches with a brilliant zipper system. You pack them with the clothes you want to take, and zip them shut. Then – this is the brilliant part – you zip a second zipper to compress the insides flat. (Think of it like your expandable suitcase, when you open that second zipper, it gives you an extra inch or two of suitcase space. When you zip it shut, everything inside is compressed.)

As a bonus, the clothes you lay inside the packing cube are much more likely to stay wrinkle free. I don’t know why. But it’s true.

Stick with One Basic Color

When I head to a Caribbean resort, that color will be white. But most of the time, it’s black – black pants, a black skirt, a black dress. Then I add color in the tops I will wear with the pants and skirt. Finally, I pack a few scarves and funky costume jewelry to dress everything up or down and add more color.

Wear the Heavy Stuff on the Plane

There are plenty of TikTokers and travel hacker influencers who will tell you to wear layers and layers on the plane to save suitcase space. Or to pack a pillowcase with your stuff and pretend it’s a pillow, not a suitcase, so it doesn’t count as a carryon.

While that might be useful info for travelers on uber-budget airlines that charge for anything that doesn’t fit under your seat, you really don’t have to go that crazy. Just use a little common sense.

If, for example, you’re flying from Florida to Colorado, you know you’ll need your winter coat, hat, gloves, hiking boots and heavy jeans. Wear the jeans and hiking boots on the plane, stuff the hat and gloves in the coat pockets and carry the coat on the plane rather than packing it in a suitcase.

I do this anyway because I’m always chilly on a plane. I’m always surprised when I see someone boarding a flight in shorts and flip flops. I would be blue by the time I landed!

Think Layers, Not Bulk

Thin layers are always the right answer, no matter where you are. Even a Caribbean vacation requires preparing for chilly evenings or overly air-conditioned restaurants. Layers are the answer to staying warm and packing light.

Make the Best Use of Your Under-Seat Bag

Finally, remember that you get not one, but two things to carry onto the plane – a bag that goes into the overhead and a smaller bag that fits under the seat in front of you.

Don’t waste the space in that second bag!

My go-to is a roomy backpack because I travel with a lot of electronics – laptop, Kindle, phone, ear buds and all of the cords and accessories they require. But those only take up two zippered compartments. That leaves two more compartments for other things – makeup bag, an extra pair of shoes, etc.

The other thing that works for me is a big striped bag that is super flexible. I can cram a lot into it and still stuff it under the seat. The downside of that is it is heavy to carry, unlike my backpack which easily distributes the weight across my shoulders.

Practice, Practice, Practice

I know. This isn’t easy. Especially if you’ve always been an overpacker. But practice will make perfect. Try it on your next quick weekend trip. That will give you a chance to see how it feels to only pack what you’ll need for 2-3 days, how much you like being able to lift that light carry-on bag and how happy you are not worrying about whether your suitcase will show up at the other end of your flight.

Just remember to pack one more thing: a credit card. That way, if you find you truly can’t live without something for a few days, you can head to the store to buy it.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Are you an overpacker or an underpacker? What’s your favorite packing hack? Share with us in the comment section below.

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Some Days All You Have to Do Is Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Some Days All You Have to Do Is Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Whatever age you are in life, nothing is perfect. If you are 16, you may be deciding your future, taking exams, trying to fit in, building relationships, or maybe wondering how to cover up an enormous pimple. :)

If you are in your 30s, you might be struggling to buy a home/have somewhere to live, find a partner, climb the career ladder, bring up children, and make a life for yourself.

In your 60s you may have to deal with health issues, finances, where to spend your later years, or the sad loss of friends and loved ones.

That doesn’t mean that life isn’t beautiful for the most part. My life seems to have been a series of huge up and downs… thankfully, far more ups than downs!

But sometimes life throws a problem, or maybe a series of problems, and you really don’t know which way to turn. What do you do?

Take a Step Back

We may become so entrenched in what is happening we can’t really see the situation for what it is, and how we should react. So, the first thing to do is to take a step back. 

Write down your priorities and what needs to be done first. Be brave, clarity helps you to achieve a successful outcome.

For example, if it is a financial concern:

Be Gentle with Yourself

Sometimes it is easy to think we are the only ones with problems. We may think we have made bad decisions or taken wrong turns. We may become angry, feel guilty, have regrets. However difficult and painful things are, they are all part of the tapestry of life. You will get through it.

The most important thing is to care for yourself. Eat well, sleep often, listen to music, read a book, take a walk. These will go a long way to normalising life and help you move forward. 

Sometimes the only thing you might feel able to do in a day is just breathe. 

And that is fine.

Build Yourself an Invisible Cloak

I like to build myself an invisible cloak, which I call my Angel Wings. Inside it, nothing can hurt me. It is my shield against the world and allows me time to rest, think, become stronger, and work out a way forward.

So many things in life sort themselves out – if we give them time. If you think of all the things that have happened in your life, they were either not as bad as you thought, fixed themselves, or you fixed them. Just think about that for a moment…

It means most things are often sorted without any help, and the ones that you managed to do yourself just show how brave, resilient, resourceful and clever you are! :)

You Are Who You Are Because of Your Challenges

You are not the same person as you were, you have learned so much over the years. Gained skills that you may have thought impossible, become competent, proficient, and mastered so much.

Be proud of your achievements and, next time a problem arises, know that you have everything within you to solve it.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Which challenges have shaped you into the person you are today? Do you handle problems differently from your 50-year-old self?

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How to Make Your Own Essential Oil Blend for Mature Skin (Recipe)

A Basic Essential Oil Blend for Everyday Mature Skin Care

With all the wonderful natural facial serums on the market today, it can be a little overwhelming choosing the correct formula with safe, non-toxic ingredients, all at a reasonable price. The good news is that it’s easy and fun to make a quality product on your own using the miracle of nature – essential oils. 

When I started working with skincare formulas in 2003, one of the first products I was excited about making was an essential oil-based facial serum. My skin needs were changing, and a moisturizing oil made perfect sense for dry, maturing skin.

I decided to work with four wonderful healthy aging essential oils I had discovered: Lavender, Frankincense, Rose Geranium, and Carrot Seed.

The natural and highly effective nature of essential oils makes them perfect for skincare. When blended for their various properties and used with a carrier oil that matches your skin type, you can create a serum tailor-made for your skin.

What Are Essential Oils?

Essential oils are the essence of plants. Hidden away in many parts of the plant, like the flowers, seeds, and roots, they are very potent chemical compounds. They can give the plant its scent, protect it from harsh conditions, and help with pollination.

The benefits of essential oils on humans are diverse and amazing. Lavender flower oil, for example, contains compounds that help soothe skin irritation and redness, while the scent reduces feelings of anxiety and stress.

The beautiful Rose essential oil is hydrating to the skin and sometimes used to treat scarring, while the scent is known to help lift depression. 

There are many essential oils to choose from for specific skincare needs. I have used a myriad of different combinations but keep coming back to the tried and true blend from my very first serum.

The four essential oils used are the workhorses of skincare for mature skin, as well as being wonderfully uplifting for mind, body, and spirit. 

The Base Oil Blend Formula

Here’s what you’ll need:

Bottle

1 oz. amber dropper bottle. You can find those in pharmacies or online.

Base (Carrier) Oil

As a base, you can use one of the oils below or a combination of several that meet your skin’s needs:

  • Jojoba oil is my base oil of choice. It’s incredible for most skin types: it’s extremely gentle and non-irritating for sensitive skin, moisturizing for dry skin, balancing for oily skin, ideal for combination skin, and offers a barrier of protection from environmental stressors. It also helps skin glow as it delivers deep hydration.
  • Rosehip oil smooths the skin’s texture and calms redness and irritation.
  • Argan oil contains high levels of vitamin E and absorbs thoroughly into the skin leaving little oily residue.
  • Avocado oil is effective at treating age spots and sun damage, as well as helping to soothe inflammatory conditions such as blemishes and eczema.
  • Olive oil is a heavier oil and the perfect choice if your skin needs a mega-dose of hydration. Just be aware that olive oil takes longer to absorb and leaves the skin with an oily feeling. This may be desirable for extremely dry, red, itchy skin.

Essential Oils

  • Lavender essential oil is very versatile and healing. It helps reduce inflammation, kill bacteria, and clear pores. Its scent is also calming and soothing.
  • Frankincense essential oil helps to tone and strengthen mature skin in addition to fighting bacteria and balancing oil production.
  • Rose Geranium essential oil helps tighten the skin by reducing the appearance of fine lines, helps reduce inflammation and fight redness, and offers anti-bacterial benefits to help fight the occasional breakout. The scent is also known to be soothing and balancing.
  • Carrot seed oil is a fantastic essential oil for combination skin. It helps even the skin tone while reducing inflammation and increasing water retention.

The Recipe

Let’s start with a simple recipe:

  • 1 oz. Jojoba oil (or carrier oil of your choice)
  • 10 drops Lavender
  • 10 drops Frankincense
  • 10 drops Rose Geranium
  • 10 drops Carrot seed oil 

Place the essential oil drops in the amber dropper bottle then fill with Jojoba/carrier oil. It’s that simple!

Applying Your Homemade Serum

Use this serum morning and evening as part of your regular skincare routine. Serums work best when applied after cleansing your face. You can cleanse with Coconut Oil or a mixture of oils for enhanced hydration (we will cover this in the next article) or use your regular facial cleanser.

Essential oils will not interfere in any way with your normal skincare products.

Keep in mind that the serum is concentrated. Use only a pea-sized amount, work it into your fingertips, and apply evenly over the face without tugging or pulling.

If your skin feels tacky, reduce the amount on the next application. Your skin should feel soft, not oily. Follow with your regular moisturizer if you like. 

Making your own facial serum is fun and rewarding! I look forward to hearing your thoughts and ideas on essential oils and making personalized serums and skincare.

What facial serum do you use? Have you made one yourself? What is your favorite essential oil for skin care? Please share your thoughts with our community!

Some Days All You Have to Do Is Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Some Days All You Have to Do Is Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Whatever age you are in life, nothing is perfect. If you are 16, you may be deciding your future, taking exams, trying to fit in, building relationships, or maybe wondering how to cover up an enormous pimple. 🙂

If you are in your 30s, you might be struggling to buy a home/have somewhere to live, find a partner, climb the career ladder, bring up children, and make a life for yourself.

In your 60s you may have to deal with health issues, finances, where to spend your later years, or the sad loss of friends and loved ones.

That doesn’t mean that life isn’t beautiful for the most part. My life seems to have been a series of huge up and downs… thankfully, far more ups than downs!

But sometimes life throws a problem, or maybe a series of problems, and you really don’t know which way to turn. What do you do?

Take a Step Back

We may become so entrenched in what is happening we can’t really see the situation for what it is, and how we should react. So, the first thing to do is to take a step back. 

Write down your priorities and what needs to be done first. Be brave, clarity helps you to achieve a successful outcome.

For example, if it is a financial concern:

Be Gentle with Yourself

Sometimes it is easy to think we are the only ones with problems. We may think we have made bad decisions or taken wrong turns. We may become angry, feel guilty, have regrets. However difficult and painful things are, they are all part of the tapestry of life. You will get through it.

The most important thing is to care for yourself. Eat well, sleep often, listen to music, read a book, take a walk. These will go a long way to normalising life and help you move forward. 

Sometimes the only thing you might feel able to do in a day is just breathe. 

And that is fine.

Build Yourself an Invisible Cloak

I like to build myself an invisible cloak, which I call my Angel Wings. Inside it, nothing can hurt me. It is my shield against the world and allows me time to rest, think, become stronger, and work out a way forward.

So many things in life sort themselves out – if we give them time. If you think of all the things that have happened in your life, they were either not as bad as you thought, fixed themselves, or you fixed them. Just think about that for a moment…

It means most things are often sorted without any help, and the ones that you managed to do yourself just show how brave, resilient, resourceful and clever you are! 🙂

You Are Who You Are Because of Your Challenges

You are not the same person as you were, you have learned so much over the years. Gained skills that you may have thought impossible, become competent, proficient, and mastered so much.

Be proud of your achievements and, next time a problem arises, know that you have everything within you to solve it.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Which challenges have shaped you into the person you are today? Do you handle problems differently from your 50-year-old self?

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Ciara Miller’s Gold and Green Earrings

Ciara Miller’s Gold and Green Earrings / Summer House Fashion Season 10 Episode 14

Ciara Miller lifts a huge weight off our shoulders when it comes to summer shopping. Whether it be an outfit or a stunning accessory, like her gold and green earrings on last night’s episode of Summer House. We found this style at a few places, but what we haven’t lost here is our ability to snag a similar pair of statement-making earrings below.

Best in Blonde,

Amanda


Ciara Miller's Gold and Green Earrings

Click Here to Shop More Similar Earrings

*We just aren’t exactly sure where she got hers since we found similar a few places!


Style Stealers

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Originally posted at: Ciara Miller’s Gold and Green Earrings

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Dara Levitan’s White Cutout Swimsuit

Dara Levitan’s White Cutout Swimsuit / Summer House Season 10 Episode 14 Fashion

As I’ve stated before I now have a pool at my new house so def need to up my swimsuit game. And I am a sucker for one pieces so I of course loved the white cutout one that Dara Levitan wore on Summer House last night. It’s both modest and sexy which is always a good combo and I double dog Dara you to shop something similar for yourself. 

Sincerely Stylish,

Jess


Dara Levitan's White Cutout Swimsuit

Click Here to Shop Additional Stock / Click Here for More


Style Stealers

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Originally posted at: Dara Levitan’s White Cutout Swimsuit

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Lindsay Hubbard’s Leopard Print Maxi Dress

Lindsay Hubbard’s Leopard Print Maxi Dress / Summer House Season 10 Episode 14 Fashion

I agree with the chef on Summer House last night, Lindsay Hubbard does clean up nice! She looked stunning in her leopard print maxi dress for the Freedom Dinner Round 2. And we actually found it along with Style Stealers and thankfully so because we’d be lost if we didn’t have a dress like this ourselves. 

Sincerely Stylish,

Jess


Lindsay Hubbard's Leopard Print Maxi Dress

Style Stealers

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Originally posted at: Lindsay Hubbard’s Leopard Print Maxi Dress

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Losing Confidence After 60? It’s Not What You Think

Losing Confidence After 60 It’s Not What You Think

Somewhere after 60, the same moments start meaning different things.

A forgotten name becomes a warning sign. A tired afternoon becomes evidence. A pause becomes proof. A no becomes a limit.

Nothing about the moments has changed. The interpretation has.

A younger person misses a deadline and thinks, I messed up.  A woman over 60 misses the same deadline and thinks, Maybe I’m slipping.

Same event. Different conclusion. And often, the conclusion is doing most of the damage.

Confidence Is Not the Absence of Doubt

We tend to think confidence means feeling certain. It doesn’t. Certainty is a feeling. Confidence is steadier than that. It’s the ability to trust your judgment, your perception, and your capacity – even when discomfort shows up.

Most of us weren’t more confident at 30. We were simply less bruised, less self-conscious, and living in a culture that still reflected possibility back to us.

What changes after 60 is not usually capability. It’s interpretation.

The same nervousness that once meant I’m learning now becomes I’m losing it.  The same pause that once meant I’m thinking now whispers I’m slowing down.

The event hasn’t changed. The meaning attached to it has.

An Important Distinction

Not every loss of confidence after 60 is a distortion. Some changes are real. Processing speed can shift. Physical stamina can change. Ageism exists. Health concerns deserve attention, not denial. Persistent memory or cognitive changes should be discussed with a physician, not dismissed as “negative thinking.”

But much of the daily erosion in confidence I see has less to do with actual decline than with the interpretation of ordinary human moments.

After 60, normal experiences often get filtered through a narrative of decline.

  • Fatigue becomes weakness.
  • Uncertainty becomes incompetence.
  • Needing support becomes dependency.
  • One forgotten detail becomes evidence.

That lens changes everything.

The Distortions That Quietly Undermine Confidence

Psychologists have names for the mental shortcuts that distort perception. A few appear repeatedly in women over 60:

Catastrophizing

You forget why you walked into a room and immediately wonder if it’s dementia. One moment becomes a diagnosis.

Mind-Reading

A younger colleague seems distracted, and you assume she sees you as outdated. No evidence – just interpretation filling in the blanks.

All-or-Nothing Thinking

You can’t do something the way you once did, so you conclude you shouldn’t do it at all. The middle ground – differently, not less – disappears.

Emotional reasoning

You feel invisible at a dinner party, so you assume you are invisible. The feeling becomes the fact.

If any of these sound familiar, it doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re human – with a brain trying to protect you by predicting worst-case scenarios.

(For readers who want the science behind why interpretation shapes health this powerfully – across pain, diagnosis, and aging – I’ve written more about that in Beyond Positive Thinking: The Science of How Interpretation Shapes Health.)

The Body Speaks Before the Mind Explains

Uncertainty has a physical signature: a tight chest, tense shoulders, a flutter in the stomach before entering a room full of strangers.

Earlier in life, we often interpreted those sensations as I’m nervous or This matters. Later in life, many people start interpreting the same sensations as I can’t handle this anymore.

The sensation is the same. The interpretation changes.

The next time discomfort rises in your body, pause before naming it. Ask yourself:

Is this danger – or just discomfort?

Most of the time, it’s discomfort. And discomfort is not evidence of decline. It’s often evidence that something matters to you.

Feelings are messages. Actions are choices. Those two things are not the same.

What Actually Builds Confidence

Real confidence at this stage of life is not built through forced positivity or pretending fear away. It’s built through accurate seeing.

When something shakes your confidence, pause and ask:

  • What actually happened?
  • What evidence supports this fear?
  • What evidence contradicts it?
  • Am I reacting to reality – or to interpretation?
  • Is this decline, or simply discomfort?

These questions create space between the event and the story attached to it. And in that space, you regain perspective.

I’ve watched women in their 70s and 80s become calmer, clearer, and more grounded – not because doubt disappeared, but because they stopped treating every fearful thought as truth.

A Different Definition of Confidence

Confidence after 60 is not about becoming fearless. It’s about becoming less distorted.

Less ruled by catastrophic interpretation. Less controlled by old narratives. Less willing to mistake one uncomfortable moment for evidence of personal decline.

You have not necessarily lost confidence. More often, you’ve lost the habit of seeing yourself clearly beneath years of messaging, comparison, and accumulated fear.

That habit can be rebuilt. Not through reinvention. Through accurate seeing.

The woman you fear you are becoming is rarely the woman standing in the mirror.

The woman in the mirror has raised people, ended things, started things, buried people, kept going. She has been underestimated and overlooked, and she is still here – still deciding, still choosing what to do next.

That is not the résumé of someone in decline. That is the résumé of someone who has been quietly accumulating evidence her whole life – and forgot to read it back to herself.

Start there.

Let’s Talk:

What’s a moment you initially read as “I’m slipping” that turned out to be something else entirely — tiredness, distraction, or just being human? Share your story in the comments below.

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The Valley Season 3 Episode 6 Fashion

The Valley Season 3 Episode 6 Fashion

Last night The Valley gang left the valley for San Diego! The theme of the night seemed to be rollercoasters whether that be an emotional one or an actual rollercoaster- either way it looked like a time! And of course we tracked down some of the need-to-know looks from the episode so take a ride below to shop! 🎢

Sincerely Stylish,

Jess


Lala Kent’s Grey Striped Sweater and Shorts

Lala Kent's Grey Striped Sweater and Shorts


Nia Sanchez’s White Eyelet Smock Dress

Nia Sanchez's White Eyelet Smock Dress


Janet Caperna’s Brown Strapless Top and Shorts

Janet Caperna's Brown Strapless Top and Shorts

Top by Meshki


Michelle Saniei’s Brown Contrast Trim Cargo Pants

Michelle Saniei's Brown Contrast Trim Cargo Pants


Nia Sanchez’s Floral Romper


Lala Kent’s Floral Shorts and Black Sunglasses

Lala Kent's Floral Shorts and Black Sunglasses


Michelle Saniei’s White Striped Polo Top

Michelle Saniei's White Striped Polo


Brittany Cartwright’s Denim Zip Up Crop Top and Pants

Brittany Cartwright's Denim Zip Up Crop Top and Pants


Jasmine Goode’s Yellow Maxi Shirt Dress

Jasmine Goode's Yellow Maxi Shirt Dress


Brittany Cartwright’s Blue and Yellow Side Striped Sweatpants

Brittany Cartwright's Blue and Yellow Side Striped Sweatpants


Season 3 Confessional Looks

Lala Kent’s Leopard Confessional Look

Lala Kent's Black Leopard Confessional Look

Nia Sanchez’s 3D Floral Dress

Nia Sanchez's Floral Applique Confessional Dress

Janet Caperna’s Brown Sequin Dress

Janet Caperna's Brown Sequin Confessional Dress

Lala Kent’s Denim Look Dress

Lala Kent's Denim Look Confessional Dress

Jasmine Goode’s White Halter Dress

Jasmine Goode's White Halter Confessional Dress

Michelle Saniei’s Blue Crop Top and Skirt

Lala Kent's Black Asymmetrical Confessional Look

Nia Sanchez’s Light Blue Confessional Look

Nia Sanchez's Light Blue Confessional Dress





Originally posted at: The Valley Season 3 Episode 6 Fashion

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