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Originally posted at: Real Housewives of Potomac Season 10 Reunion Looks

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My mom never stopped asking me when I was going to have my long hair cut short. Even at 96 years old, she felt compelled to warn me that long hair on women of a certain age looked “inappropriate,” her word for attention-seeking.

With an adorable, curly pomp that got a “wash and set” every Friday, my mom was understandably a product of a generation where women, once married and maternal, were expected to do the sensible thing with their hair.

Old cultural norms told us that long hair belonged to the young, the carefree and the delightfully flirtatious. Once you had children, wanted to be taken seriously in your career, or passed some invisible expiration date on desirability, a short crop or a chin-grazing bob was just another rite of passage.

And yet, here we are in 2026, watching women over 60 go to great lengths to do exactly the opposite.

Scroll social media, flip through fashion coverage, or simply pay attention in the real world, and you’ll see it everywhere: silver hair worn long and loose, glossy ponytails swinging with confidence or peeking out from the backs of baseball caps, soft waves framing faces rich with experience. Later-life women are no longer quietly editing themselves out of the style conversation. They’re embracing every opportunity to dress their authentic selves, and long hair has become one of its most visible signatures.

Style-Makers Over 60 Prove Long Hair Has No Age Limit

Celebrities and style-makers have helped normalize this shift. Actress Demi Moore has made long, dark hair part of her enduring visual identity, well into her 60s. She even locked in an endorsement contract as Global Brand Ambassador for the Kérastase line of hair care – a deal usually reserved for 20-year-old stars.

Academy Award winner Michelle Yeoh, also in her 60s and more powerful than ever, often wears her hair long and flowing, pairing elegance with authority on red carpets around the world. Trinny Woodall, a popular midlife style rule-breaker, regularly shows up online with long, undone hair that reinforces her message: wear what works for you. And actress, singer and songwriter Rita Wilson continues to favor long, feminine styles that feel relaxed, confident, and unmistakably modern.

What’s striking is that none of this feels like clinging to youth. It feels like living authentically and claiming visibility.

For decades, women were subtly told that long hair signaled a desire for male attention, or worse, an unwillingness to look or grow “old.” Thank goodness today’s later-life women are outliving those stereotypes. Many are single, dating again, or simply enjoying a renewed relationship with their own concept of what it means to look and feel beautiful. Long hair, for some, seems playful, while for others it feels powerful. For many, it’s just who they are.

The Beauty Industry Responds to Women Over 60 Embracing Long Hair

The beauty industry is fully on board with the later-life, long hair movement. According to industry analysts, the global hair care market has ballooned into an annual $80+ billion category, with particularly strong growth in premium products, serums, masks, and scalp treatments. These are exactly the kinds of tools that support longer, healthier hair at every age.

Hair color, too, has become more nuanced and sophisticated, with gray-blending techniques, dimensional color, and gentler formulations making it easier than ever to maintain long, lush locks without sacrificing hair health. Long hair is no longer reserved for the young or genetically lucky. It’s accessible because it’s supported by better technology, smarter formulations, and a broader understanding that great hair doesn’t have an age limit.

Recently, I had this conversation with my hair stylist, John Vega of Salon Del Mar in Santa Fe, New Mexico. John began cutting hair in the 1980s and says he has seen every trend from shaved heads to Cher hair. He notes that well-groomed, below-the-shoulders hair has become entirely acceptable for women in their later years.

“I wouldn’t say that the women I see are focused on sex appeal,” Vega explains. “It’s more about feeling independent and being able to look how they want. Women see older celebrities with long hair looking great and really owning their identity. They don’t feel like they have to give that up simply because of the age on their driver’s license.”

Growing Long Hair After Chemotherapy: Reclaiming Femininity

For some women, growing hair long later in life carries even deeper meaning. After chemotherapy and cancer treatment, hair loss can feel like a public stripping away of femininity and control. Growing hair long again becomes an act of rebellion and reclamation and a visible declaration of survival. For these cancer warriors, it’s not about vanity. It’s about agency and choosing to look and feel “womanly” after a period of devastating trauma.

Reinventing Yourself After 60: Freedom, Visibility and Choice

And then there’s freedom. Many women in their 60s and beyond are no longer living by anyone else’s rules. Children leave the house, careers shift, partnerships change, and body image evolves. What’s left is a wide-open space ready to be filled with something new – or perhaps the return of something from long ago.

What’s most powerful is how unforced this movement feels. No manifesto. No trend forecast required. Just women choosing what feels expressive, authentic, and joyful for themselves.

Going to great lengths, it turns out, has very little to do with hair. It’s about the refusal to believe there’s an expiration date on anything that makes you feel good.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How do you wear your hair? What have you been told about keeping your hair long?

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You did everything right.

You noticed something in your body. You researched it. You came prepared with questions.

And your doctor shut you down in under a minute.

“That’s just normal aging.” “There’s no evidence for that.” “I wouldn’t worry about it.”

If you felt the flush of shame – the tightening in your chest, the urge to apologize, the sudden doubt about everything you thought you knew – you’re not alone.

And there’s nothing wrong with you.

Why Dismissal Hurts So Much

Being dismissed by a doctor isn’t just frustrating. It’s destabilizing.

For women especially, we’ve often been taught to defer. To trust the expert over our own knowing. To be “good patients” – which usually means quiet ones.

When a doctor dismisses us, it activates old wiring:

• Shame: “I shouldn’t have asked.”
• Self-doubt: “Maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about.”
• The urge to retreat: “Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

This isn’t weakness. It’s your nervous system responding to a perceived threat – the threat of being seen as difficult or wrong. And for many of us, it echoes every other time we were made small for speaking up.

Linda’s Story

Imagine a woman – let’s call her Linda. She’s 64. For months, she’d dealt with fatigue and brain fog that didn’t match her healthy lifestyle.

She researched. She brought questions to her doctor of 12 years. Her doctor glanced at the chart: “Your labs are normal. This is just part of getting older.”

Linda felt her face flush. Her first instinct was to apologize and leave quietly. But she paused. She noticed the familiar pull to abandon her own knowing. And she made a different choice.

“I hear you,” she said. “But this doesn’t feel normal to me. Can we dig deeper?”

Her doctor didn’t have time that day. But Linda didn’t stop. She found a practitioner who listened. She got comprehensive testing. She discovered treatable imbalances her original doctor never looked for.

Six months later, her energy was back. She wasn’t crazy. She wasn’t “just aging.” She had been right to ask.

Feel, Pause, Act

The moment of dismissal is not the moment to react. It’s the moment to regulate.

Feel the sensation. Notice it. Name it. “There’s that shame again.” Don’t push it away – just let it exist.

Pause. Take a breath. Feel your feet on the floor. You’re not in danger. You’re in discomfort.

Act from a grounded place. Not reactive. Not collapsed. Clear.

That might sound like:

• “I’d like to explore this further.”
• “Can you help me understand why?”
• “This matters to me. I’d like to find a way forward.”

You don’t have to win the argument. You just have to stay with yourself.

Why Doctors Dismiss

Most doctors aren’t trying to hurt you. They’re working within a system that gives them 12-15 minutes per patient – a system that trains them to trust certain kinds of evidence and dismiss others.

When your doctor says “there’s no evidence,” she often means no large-scale FDA-approved trials. But those trials cost billions and only happen when someone expects to profit.

Many promising approaches will never have that evidence – not because they don’t work, but because proving it isn’t profitable. Your doctor isn’t lying. She’s operating within real limits – limits she may not fully see.

That’s not a reason to abandon her. But it is a reason to understand what you’re navigating.

From Chains to Wings

I wrote a book with that title because I believe this is the work of our lives. We internalized messages early: Don’t be difficult. Don’t question authority. Don’t trust yourself more than the experts.

Those messages became chains.

Health advocacy is one of the most powerful places to break them.

Every time you ask a question and stay grounded when it’s dismissed – you’re practicing freedom. Every time you say “I’d like to understand more” instead of “Never mind” – you’re reclaiming your voice. Every time you trust your body even when a lab says “normal” – you’re honoring your own knowing.

What You Can Do

1. Prepare before appointments – Write down questions and concerns. You’re less likely to be dismissed if you’re organized.
2. Notice your nervous system – When dismissed, pause before reacting. Breathe. Then respond from a grounded place.
3. Use clear language – “This matters to me.” “Can you help me understand?” These keep the conversation open.
4. Find practitioners who listen – You don’t have to fire your doctor. But you can add to your team.
5. Trust yourself – You’ve lived in your body for decades. That knowledge matters.

You’ve Earned the Right to Be Heard

We’re told to advocate for ourselves. But when we do, we’re often shut down.

What we deserve is different. We deserve to be partners in our care – not inconveniences. We deserve our questions to be met with curiosity, not condescension.

We’re not asking doctors to agree with everything. We’re asking to be heard.

We’ve earned that. We’ve earned the right to feel what we feel, pause when we need to, and act from clarity.

We’ve earned our wings.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What is your experience with your doctor? Do you feel your concerns are heard – or do you feel dismissed?

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Originally posted at: Get These Southern Charm Looks for Much Less from Amazon

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Is your mind filled with anxiety? Maybe you’re suffering from sleepless nights and feeling nervous and upset all day. Perhaps you worry all the time, imagining the worst-case scenarios.

Maybe having an anxiety-free mind sounds impossible. Maybe you think anxiety is helpful and necessary. That it helps you solve your problems. But if you’re honest, what you really want is to relax and calm down.

You want to be free of anxiety.

It is truly possible to become anxiety-free – no matter what your situation is.

A few years ago, I was an anxious mess. A family situation had me in knots. I hardly ate, couldn’t sleep, and was consumed with worry all day. In the midst of my misery, I decided to do something about my anxiety. The journey to become anxiety-free was worth it!

Here’s what I discovered…

Your Mind Can Fabricate Things That Aren’t Actually True

It’s true! You can’t believe everything your mind tells you. Thoughts are just thoughts! You don’t need to trust every one of them. Not all thoughts are equal.

What to do: Examine your thoughts carefully.

Awareness of Your Thoughts Is Key

It’s important to be aware of your thoughts. This means pausing long enough to become mindful of the thoughts rolling around in your mind. Take a break from your whirlwind of thoughts. Stop long enough to sort out your thoughts and feelings. Identify the ones causing your anxiety.

What to do: Pause and identify the thoughts that cause anxiety.

It’s Important to Analyze Where Your Thoughts Come From

This is a reflective process that takes a bit of time but helps you understand the root of your thoughts. Thoughts come from a lifetime of experiences that have formed impressions or unconscious ideas about how life works and your place in the world. For example, individuals with anxiety might have unconscious thoughts like:

• I will always be a worrier.
• Life is unsafe and scary.
• I’ll never be able to calm down.
• Something must be wrong with me.

What to do: Figure out where your thoughts originate.

Core Beliefs Affect All Areas of Your Life

Unconscious thoughts affect everything you do. They influence your thoughts, feelings, decisions and actions. Why? Because they form the foundational system of beliefs by which you live.

They are called CORE BELIEFS. For instance, someone living with the core belief that anxiety is the way to cope with problems, experiences a mind automatically filled with anxious thoughts and feelings when something happens.

An event could even be neutral but those of us with anxiety will interpret it as being negative and dangerous. While someone else operating from a different set of beliefs might interpret the event as a positive opportunity.

What to do: Consider how your core beliefs affect your current situation/mindset.

Limiting Beliefs Cripple Us, and We Must Change Them

Core beliefs become LIMITING BELIEFS when you trust and act on them. Hanging on to the core belief, for instance, that life is unsafe and scary, holds you back in life. Fear and anxiety control your thoughts, feelings, decisions and actions.

The key to reducing limiting beliefs that cause anxiety is to allow and accept them. Be aware of your limiting beliefs and decide to do something about the ones that cause anxious thoughts.

What to do: Identify your limiting beliefs and actively eliminate them.

Remember: You don’t have to believe everything your mind tells you!

Change Is in Your Hands

You always have a choice to change negative thoughts and limiting beliefs into positive thoughts and empowering beliefs. Here’s how.

Replace old beliefs with new beliefs. For instance, someone with the old belief, “I will never be able to calm down,” could change it to the new belief, “I can calm down. I can do what it takes to calm down.”

Repeat the new belief to yourself every day! Even several times a day. Make it a habit. This will start to reprogram your mind and create new neural pathways in your brain.

You can reprogram your mind and become anxiety-free!

I hope you follow these 5 steps to become aware of your limiting beliefs, change them to new empowering beliefs and repeat the new beliefs often.

If you need some help on your path to becoming anxiety-free, check out this video.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What limiting beliefs cause you anxiety? Where do they originate? Have you taken a pause to analyze your thoughts?

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Do you ever feel like the universe, or God, or whatever your belief, is trying to tell you something? I’m having that moment right now. First, I listened to a podcast by Dr. Leaf about 5 steps to align your conscious mind with your subconscious mind. Then I had lunch with friends and part of our discussion was around how short life is and acknowledging how important it is to choose to be happy in the moment.

And then came my pastor’s most recent sermon about how life is a series of mountaintops and valleys and how to handle that. My favorite line was a quote he shared from a football quarterback who said, “You’re always either in the penthouse or the outhouse.”

Life can be a rollercoaster of happiness extremes so what should you do about it? Let’s break down these three messages a little more closely.

Conscious vs Subconscious Mind

Dr. Leaf is a neuroscientist and Mind Management expert. In books, podcasts, speaking and coaching she shares science-backed strategies to take control of your thoughts in order to live your happiest life. I find her research to be fascinating and helpful in my own life. She talks about what she calls “thinker moments” which I call a “forced pause.”

Our brains are wired for survival which doesn’t really apply to our lives today. We don’t have wild animals and hunting our own food to contend with yet our brains tend to react quickly without pausing to “think” unless we force a pause to allow the conscious mind to engage and our brains to reboot and heal. That would’ve gotten you eaten in the past but not today.

I encourage you to listen to her words of wisdom, sign up for her enlightening newsletter, and treat yourself to her free download on her five tips for switching on your brain. And spoiler alert, she also has a recent podcast about the new GLP-1 drugs and what they actually do to our brains – worth a listen!

Happy in the Moment

My lunch discussion with girlfriends was maybe similar to conversations you have had as well. After sharing stories and supporting each other with ideas, we often nudge each other to take that new step, go on that next trip, enjoy an opportunity, or just appreciate today… while we can.

It seems every time we turn around, someone we know has just lost… a brother, a friend, a parent, a spouse. What are we waiting for? Those losses are our reminder that today is a gift that we, too, often take for granted. The minute our feet hit the ground as we get out of bed each morning, are we grateful for this new day?

Mountains and Valleys

Lastly, the pastor talking about peaks and valleys wasn’t just talking about faith. He noted how extreme life can feel, with highs and lows, almost as if there seems to be nothing in between (hence the quarterback quote). And he too encouraged a “head game” to consider.

When you are on the mountain top, “look out in gratitude,” he said. When you are in the lowest valley, “look up with hope,” he encouraged. No matter the circumstance, there is a positive framework our mind can focus on. But we have to choose it.

Life by Design

I have come to believe that awareness is a superpower, but only if you choose to act on it. I know my Health and Financial Wellness for Women group probably gets tired of me reminding them that the speakers and topics I bring to the group have an ulterior motive: actionable education. Education is NOT helpful, unless we put it into practice. So, my challenge to them is to write down three interesting or new things they learned at each meeting. And then circle the one they will take action on.

We can choose to break the cycle of learning and not doing, of reacting and not pausing first, or of going through our days without gratitude. I have seen women and couples choose a positive head game after loss, career curveballs, upending life events, and toxic people in their lives.

It sounds so simple to remind ourselves how moving forward in life is a choice. But it’s actually good news, that our minds are the ONE and ONLY thing we really can control in life. So it behooves us to become more aware, learn about our most amazing organ (our brains), and choose positivity in this head game of life.

Let’s Reflect:

Have you experienced a mindset shift in your life? How do you deal with mountains and valleys? Any tips that you have found helpful to “force a pause” to engage your conscious mind rather than habitually just reacting? Let’s share our thoughts.

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