Author: Admin01

Lately, I’ve been looking at getting older a little differently.

I don’t see it as something slipping away anymore. I’ve started to think of it more like a 1943 Ford – still standing, still running, but with a few parts that have needed attention along the way.

And before anyone corrects me, yes, I know Ford didn’t make cars for the public in 1943. The war effort had them focused elsewhere, producing vehicles for military use. But a few were made, and the point is this – those machines were built to last, and the ones still around today didn’t get there by accident. They were maintained, repaired, and restored when needed.

That’s how I’ve begun to look at myself.

The Procedures I’ve Been Through to Date

If I take inventory, I’ve had my share of work done. There’s a screw in my knee from a skiing accident back in 1984. In 2012, I had a hip replacement. Around 2020, I started wearing hearing aids. In 2022, my gallbladder came out. And now, every three months, I go in for injections in my knees just so I can keep walking without pain.

If I laid all that out like a list of parts, it might sound like something’s gone wrong. But that’s not how it feels to me.

It feels like maintenance.

Body Maintenance Increases with Age

There was a time when I didn’t think much about my body at all. It just did what I asked of it. I walked where I wanted and moved without thinking much about it. I gave very little thought to the idea that one day, things might need attention. I think most of us live that way for a long time – assuming everything will just keep working the way it always has.

Then, little by little, things change.

It’s not always dramatic. Sometimes it’s just a stiffness that doesn’t go away, or a sound that gets harder to hear, or a movement that reminds you something isn’t quite the same. You start to notice the wear.

And, at first, I think there’s a tendency to see that as loss.

But somewhere along the way, my thinking shifted.

Turning Toward Positive Thinking

Instead of focusing on what had changed, I started noticing what was still possible – and more importantly, what was being made possible.

That screw in my knee? It kept me going after an accident that could have stopped me. That hip replacement? It gave me back movement I was starting to lose. The hearing aids? They brought voices and sounds back into focus. The gallbladder surgery? It solved a problem that wasn’t going to fix itself. And those knee injections every few months? They give me something I don’t take lightly anymore – the ability to get up and walk without pain.

I don’t look at those things as signs of breaking down. I see them as reasons I’m still moving.

The pain is real. There’s no pretending it isn’t. And recovery can take time. There are moments when you wonder how many more repairs might be ahead, or how long the current fix will hold.

But there’s something else that sits alongside that – gratitude.

I’ve Found Gratitude

Not the loud kind. The quiet kind.

The quiet realization that we’re living in a time where there are options – real, tangible options – that didn’t exist for the generations before us.

Our grandparents didn’t always have these choices. A bad hip could mean the end of mobility. Hearing loss might simply become silence. Chronic pain was something you endured, not something you managed with ongoing care. When something wore out, there often wasn’t much to be done.

That’s not the case anymore.

Today, there are people who know how to repair what needs repairing. There are treatments that can extend movement, ease pain, restore function. There’s technology, medicine, and knowledge that give us a chance to keep going in ways that weren’t always possible.

I don’t take that for granted.

This Is a Modern-Day Gift

At 83, I’ve thought about surgery again. It’s an option. And maybe one day I’ll take it. But for now, I’m choosing the path I’m on – those regular visits, those injections that let me walk out of the office and back into my life with a little more ease.

That feels like a gift.

I’m not trying to be new again. That’s not the goal. I’m not looking to turn back the clock or pretend the miles haven’t added up.

I’m just trying to keep running.

Like that old Ford, I’ve had some parts replaced. Others have been adjusted, tuned, or supported along the way. I don’t move quite the way I used to, and I probably never will again.

But I’m still moving.

And there’s something meaningful in that.

Recognizing We Need to Pay Attention to What We’ve Been Given

When I think about it now, getting older doesn’t feel like a slow disappearance. It feels more like a process of learning how to care for what’s been given to you – recognizing when something needs attention, accepting help when it’s available, and appreciating the fact that you’re still here to do it.

There’s a kind of dignity in that, if you let yourself see it.

Maybe you’ve had a few parts replaced yourself.

So yes, I may be a 1943 Ford these days.

Not fresh off the line. Not without a few stories in the dents and repairs.

But still on the road.

And for me, that’s enough.

Let’s Chat:

What maintenance have you had thus far? Are you contemplating additional options? Do you find yourself being disappointed in how your body is performing – or are you being grateful about everything you’ve been given?

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Let’s talk about your perfectionism. I know it’s there, because you’re interested enough in improving something about your life that you’re visiting this wonderful website! But if you want to lead a happy life, you need to accept less than perfection.

Unless you are working for NASA and building a million-dollar door handle for a spaceship, it doesn’t have to be perfect.

This is something I’ve learned over many years of 1) working full-time while being a wife, mother, and now grandmother, 2) being a human, and 3) sending 183 Chicken Soup for the Soul books to the printer, every single one with invisible typos that do not show up until we’ve printed at least 50,000 copies.

90% Is Great!

I’ve learned that muddling through life accepting that I will always operate at somewhere between 90 and 95 percent is about as good as it gets.

If I can do three things well (but not perfectly) at any given time – and 90% is still pretty impressive – that’s a total score of 270 points of “getting stuff done” versus spending hours or days obsessing over one thing and getting it 99% perfect but dropping the ball in a major way on the other two. I get 270 points my way, versus 99 points the striving-for-perfection way.

Like most people, I have juggled many different full-time roles in my life – the main three being mother, wife, and executive. There were never enough hours in the day to fulfill each role as completely as I wanted when I was raising my kids.

There were nights when the kids needed me to stay home and help with homework, but I had to attend a business dinner with my husband. There were other nights when he got the short end of the stick, because I needed to put the kids first. And if I somehow managed to do all the kid stuff and husband stuff, then the work stuff would suffer.

Striving for Perfection Is Demoralizing

A wonderful psychologist and expert on stress management named Harriet Braiker wrote the breakthrough book, The Type E Woman: How to Overcome the Stress of Being Everything to Everybody. Harriet said: “Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.”

Women in particular, with all their multitasking, really need some help in letting go. Does anyone actually remember if you made everything yourself the last time you entertained, if your thank-you notes were emails or notecards, or if you’ve sent out Christmas cards every year without fail?

The Illusion of Perfection

One of my favorite Chicken Soup for the Soul stories on this topic is “The Power of Illusion,” in which Donna Milligan Meadows talks about her friend Sara, who had the perfect home, with a beautifully wallpapered living room.

Donna was lamenting that her own wallpaper didn’t line up at the seams and wasn’t straight at the ceiling. Sara responded, “It’s all an illusion. The details don’t matter. Look at my seams; they aren’t perfect either. There is a tear over in the corner. You did your wallpaper yourself so you know every spot that isn’t exactly right. No one else will see the mistakes, just like you didn’t see mine.”

Years later, Donna was days away from hosting her daughter’s wedding in her perfectly landscaped backyard, where the flowers even matched the wedding color scheme. Then the rains came. The grass developed a fungus and mushrooms sprouted everywhere. Donna was panic-stricken until she remembered Sara’s gentle voice saying: “It’s all an illusion. The details don’t matter.”

The wedding ended up being perfect, or at least the “perfect illusion of a fairy tale wedding in a magical place,” according to Donna.

And that’s why we try for perfection every day, knowing we will achieve mere excellence and that will be good enough. My editors tell me that our “good enough” is better than everyone else’s “perfection” anyway, and that may be true, since I am constantly spotting typos or grammar errors in such venerable publications as The New Yorker magazine and The New York Times and bestselling novels.

Nevertheless, we do appreciate it when our readers send us emails telling us where those typos are hiding, so we can fix them for the second printing!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Are you too much of a perfectionist? Can you pick a part of your life where you can accept less than perfection? Do you think you’ll be happier and less stressed if you deliberately try for 90% instead of 100%?

The third act of your life isn’t about becoming someone new – it’s about becoming thoroughly and unapologetically yourself.

Who do you need to impress? No one.

Whose approval do you need? Nobody’s.

Whose happiness is your responsibility? Yours. Just yours.

That’s where habits come in. You and all your interests, desires, quirks, and their momentum need a framework. The right habits can provide that framework, while the wrong ones can dismantle it.

So, if you want to make this stage of your life as exciting and enjoyable as possible, consider the following 6 habits to solidify and 6 you can ditch.

6 Habits to Cultivate

Protect Your Energy Like It’s Currency

In your 20s and 30s, energy feels renewable. Over 60, it’s more like a budget. You can absolutely spend it, but you want to spend it wisely.

This means becoming more intentional about how you spend your time and emotional energy.

Not everything deserves a response. Not every invitation requires a “yes.”

Protecting your energy isn’t selfish. To the contrary – it’s strategic. It allows you to show up fully for the things and people that are most important to you.

Stay Physically Active Without Punishing Yourself

It’s no secret that exercise is good for you. Some say that regular exercise is the true fountain of youth.

In your 60s, physical activity becomes less about appearance and more about function, longevity, feeling good in your body, and keeping your brain healthy.

The goal doesn’t need to include pushing yourself into exhaustion. Walking, strength training, yoga, swimming, dancing – anything that keeps you moving and makes you happy.

A body that moves regularly tends to hurt less, sleep better, and feel more capable.

So, run the marathon if that’s what you want to do, or just crank the music and dance.

Nurture Your Most Meaningful Relationships

At this stage, relationships tend to simplify. You’re less interested in surface-level connections and more drawn to people who feel easy, genuine, and supportive.

Maintaining and growing these relationships means reaching out, staying in touch, and being willing to deepen the relationships that matter.

It might look like,

• Calling instead of texting.
• Scheduling regular lunches or walks.
• Being honest about how you feel.

Loneliness isn’t always about being alone – it’s just as often about feeling disconnected. Strong relationships are one of the most powerful buffers against that.

Embrace Your Evolution

One of the most limiting ideas people carry with them is that they became who they are at some previous stage of life.

You didn’t.

Who you are is always changing, and as you age, you should embrace and encourage those changes. Of course, that’s the positive changes, not the negative ones. No need to lean into feeling weak or yelling at teenagers to get off your lawn.

Try exploring some new hobbies or interests you didn’t have time for before.

Personal growth doesn’t have an expiration date.

Speak Up for Yourself

By now, you’ve likely spent decades taking care of others. There’s been family, partners, work, and social requirements.

There’s something powerful about reaching a point in life where you no longer feel the need to accommodate anyone, shrink away from curiosity, or who you are.

Speaking up doesn’t mean being harsh or confrontational. It means being clear, direct, honest, and curious.

• “I’d prefer something different.”
• “That doesn’t work for me.”
• “I need some time to think about that.”
• “I have no idea what that means.”
• “You’ll have to explain that in more detail.”

Even a simple “No, thank you” or “Can you help me?” may be all it takes.

Practice Self-Compassion

If you’re not careful, as you age, your inner voice can become critical rather than forgiving.

There’s a tendency to look back and think,

• “I should have handled that differently.”
• “I wasted time.”
• “I missed all the best opportunities.”

You didn’t. That’s how life works.

Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same understanding you’d offer a close friend. It allows you to move forward without dragging regret behind you.

And perhaps most importantly, it helps you enjoy where you are without constantly comparing it to where you think you “should” be.

6 Habits to Ditch

People-Pleasing at Your Expense

This habit has deep roots for many women. Saying “yes” when you really want to say “no,” keeping the peace, and avoiding conflict are often deeply ingrained behaviors.

But over time, these behaviors become exhausting. And they’re not healthy.

Ditching people-pleasing doesn’t mean becoming difficult. It means recognizing that your needs matter just as much as anyone else’s.

The truth is that most people adjust just fine when you start setting boundaries, especially those who care about you. The ones who push back? That’s their issue, not yours.

Comparing Yourself Now to Younger Versions of Yourself

This one can be subtle but relentless. And we all do it.

You remember how much energy and passion you had, how great you looked in a crop top, how you could drop 5 pounds in a week with next to no effort. And now?

Don’t play this game – you won’t win.

Age is the great equalizer. We all go through it – if we’re lucky. None of us looks the same at 60 as we did at 20 or bounces back in quite the same way. And that’s just fine.

You traded those unearned attributes of youth for well-earned experience, perspective, confidence, clarity, and a richness that can’t be found at those younger stages.

So, don’t compete with your past – make peace with your present.

Living in Outdated Roles

For years, your identity may have been tied to specific roles – mother, caregiver, professional, partner.

And while those roles don’t disappear, they often shift. Children grow up, careers wind down, and responsibilities change.

Clinging too tightly to an old role can make you feel lost when things evolve, but letting go creates space for something new – even if you don’t know exactly what that is yet.

Avoiding Hard Conversations

It’s easy to think, “It’s not worth bringing up,” or “Why stir the pot now?”

But avoidance has a cost. It builds quiet resentment, creates distance, and often leads to misunderstandings.

Difficult conversations don’t have to be dramatic. They just have to be honest.

And more often than not, addressing something directly brings relief, not conflict.

Neglecting Your Own Needs

This often goes hand-in-hand with people-pleasing. Many women are so used to taking care of others that they’ve forgotten how to recognize and tend to their own needs.

But we all need our own space, time for creativity, self-care, support, love, and the ability to grow through our own interests.

Neglecting these needs doesn’t make them disappear, but it will drain you and leave you feeling dissatisfied and empty.

Paying attention to your own needs isn’t selfish or indulgent. It’s necessary.

Believing It’s Too Late

This might be the most limiting and damaging habit of all.

It’s too late to,

• Try something new
• Make a change
• Prioritize myself
• Be adventurous
• Fall in love
• Ask for what I want

It’s not too late for ANY of those things. The only barrier to any of that is the belief itself.

People, women in particular, reshape their lives, travel, start businesses, and fall in love in their 60s, 70s, 80s, and even beyond.

Let go of ever thinking it’s “too late.”

A Final Thought

There’s a kind of freedom available in this stage of life that doesn’t get talked about enough.

You’ve lived enough to know what matters and what doesn’t. You’ve seen things work and not work. And you’ve earned your perspective.

The habits you choose now aren’t about fixing yourself. They’re about supporting the life you want to live going forward.

Let’s Talk About It:

Have you been working on cultivating the right habits and ditching the wrong ones? Have you had success with any of them in particular? Please share your experience and join the conversation.

Lately, I’ve been looking at getting older a little differently.

I don’t see it as something slipping away anymore. I’ve started to think of it more like a 1943 Ford – still standing, still running, but with a few parts that have needed attention along the way.

And before anyone corrects me, yes, I know Ford didn’t make cars for the public in 1943. The war effort had them focused elsewhere, producing vehicles for military use. But a few were made, and the point is this – those machines were built to last, and the ones still around today didn’t get there by accident. They were maintained, repaired, and restored when needed.

That’s how I’ve begun to look at myself.

The Procedures I’ve Been Through to Date

If I take inventory, I’ve had my share of work done. There’s a screw in my knee from a skiing accident back in 1984. In 2012, I had a hip replacement. Around 2020, I started wearing hearing aids. In 2022, my gallbladder came out. And now, every three months, I go in for injections in my knees just so I can keep walking without pain.

If I laid all that out like a list of parts, it might sound like something’s gone wrong. But that’s not how it feels to me.

It feels like maintenance.

Body Maintenance Increases with Age

There was a time when I didn’t think much about my body at all. It just did what I asked of it. I walked where I wanted and moved without thinking much about it. I gave very little thought to the idea that one day, things might need attention. I think most of us live that way for a long time – assuming everything will just keep working the way it always has.

Then, little by little, things change.

It’s not always dramatic. Sometimes it’s just a stiffness that doesn’t go away, or a sound that gets harder to hear, or a movement that reminds you something isn’t quite the same. You start to notice the wear.

And, at first, I think there’s a tendency to see that as loss.

But somewhere along the way, my thinking shifted.

Turning Toward Positive Thinking

Instead of focusing on what had changed, I started noticing what was still possible – and more importantly, what was being made possible.

That screw in my knee? It kept me going after an accident that could have stopped me. That hip replacement? It gave me back movement I was starting to lose. The hearing aids? They brought voices and sounds back into focus. The gallbladder surgery? It solved a problem that wasn’t going to fix itself. And those knee injections every few months? They give me something I don’t take lightly anymore – the ability to get up and walk without pain.

I don’t look at those things as signs of breaking down. I see them as reasons I’m still moving.

The pain is real. There’s no pretending it isn’t. And recovery can take time. There are moments when you wonder how many more repairs might be ahead, or how long the current fix will hold.

But there’s something else that sits alongside that – gratitude.

I’ve Found Gratitude

Not the loud kind. The quiet kind.

The quiet realization that we’re living in a time where there are options – real, tangible options – that didn’t exist for the generations before us.

Our grandparents didn’t always have these choices. A bad hip could mean the end of mobility. Hearing loss might simply become silence. Chronic pain was something you endured, not something you managed with ongoing care. When something wore out, there often wasn’t much to be done.

That’s not the case anymore.

Today, there are people who know how to repair what needs repairing. There are treatments that can extend movement, ease pain, restore function. There’s technology, medicine, and knowledge that give us a chance to keep going in ways that weren’t always possible.

I don’t take that for granted.

This Is a Modern-Day Gift

At 83, I’ve thought about surgery again. It’s an option. And maybe one day I’ll take it. But for now, I’m choosing the path I’m on – those regular visits, those injections that let me walk out of the office and back into my life with a little more ease.

That feels like a gift.

I’m not trying to be new again. That’s not the goal. I’m not looking to turn back the clock or pretend the miles haven’t added up.

I’m just trying to keep running.

Like that old Ford, I’ve had some parts replaced. Others have been adjusted, tuned, or supported along the way. I don’t move quite the way I used to, and I probably never will again.

But I’m still moving.

And there’s something meaningful in that.

Recognizing We Need to Pay Attention to What We’ve Been Given

When I think about it now, getting older doesn’t feel like a slow disappearance. It feels more like a process of learning how to care for what’s been given to you – recognizing when something needs attention, accepting help when it’s available, and appreciating the fact that you’re still here to do it.

There’s a kind of dignity in that, if you let yourself see it.

Maybe you’ve had a few parts replaced yourself.

So yes, I may be a 1943 Ford these days.

Not fresh off the line. Not without a few stories in the dents and repairs.

But still on the road.

And for me, that’s enough.

Let’s Chat:

What maintenance have you had thus far? Are you contemplating additional options? Do you find yourself being disappointed in how your body is performing – or are you being grateful about everything you’ve been given?