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Dating in Ecuador: 3 Friends, 3 Man Magnets (or Not…)

Living Solo Dating in Ecuador 3 Friends, 3 Man Magnets (or Not...)

The three of us live in Ecuador; Polly, Molly, and Dolly (I’ve changed our names to protect the innocent). We are up to no good about 85% of the time, and the rest of the time we are fairly useless, but trying to do kind things. All three of us have gone through marriage, kids, trauma, and an international move to beautiful Ecuador. We are connected by a love of life, experiences, and the question of whether or not one of us will settle for just one fella.

Magnets (or Not)

Polly’s husband died about two years ago, and because they had a tumultuous relationship with very little action (if you know what I mean) she’s looking for what she calls “appetizers.” Sometimes she has a cheeseburger, but mostly they are appetizers, and honestly, I don’t know the difference. She has big, curly, reddish hair, hip huggers, and is like a yummy giant chocolate chip cookie.

Molly is very pretty with long-ish blonde hair and a pickleball obsession, so the Latino men chase her down and beg for things like dates, drinks… anything. She’s been divorced for many years (I never got a straight answer on how long), and she loves to date. Like, she’s on several dating apps and goes out all the time.

Having said that, Molly is not a push-over. She makes them wait for a looooonnnnnggggg time before any action happens. I think, for her, it’s kind of like a sport or a form of entertainment, and she has the absolute best stories about dumb things that happen. For example, one time a man who she had been dating for about four months ghosted her. When he reappeared a month later, he said he went to Australia, and why was she upset? I’m pretty sure she went ballistic on him, but I can’t confirm it.

Then there is Dolly. I call myself Dolly because I love Dolly Parton, but I don’t like country music so there’s that. I don’t date. I’ve been divorced for about 16 years and, after a few relationships, I decided I preferred to read books, sleep sprawled out on the couch, and avoid all male eye contact under the theory that romance never goes unpunished. Yah, I’m fun.

Stories from the Wings

As the perpetual wing-woman whenever we go out, I am vastly entertained by Polly and Molly. Polly doesn’t speak Spanish, but manages to be so fun and open-hearted with everyone she meets, that she ends up with the cutest appetizer in the room. She says that dating is healing her heart, and she keeps it light, playful, and easy. I admire her.

I’m lighthearted until the man in question says something stupid like that I should run twice around the park instead of once, insinuating that this would make me look better. I’m pretty sure I gave that guy the stink-eye and dumped him, but I cannot confirm or deny this fact.

Molly speaks Spanish and loves to dance salsa. She gets on the floor, and, even though she’s not great at it, she is a perpetual learner and loves a good challenge. I admire her. I suck at dancing and am so awkward as to defy belief. We go dancing and I have a wonderful time being ridiculous and watching the Ecuadorians who popped out dancing at birth.

I think Molly’s attitude to dating is like a safety valve; she can let out steam and always go home to her peace and quiet. I understand. Dating anywhere in the world has its share of minefields, and it’s important to keep your balance, stand in the sunshine and know who you are.

Chocolate Magnet

Chocolate has pluses and minuses. On the one hand, it’s delicious and gives you a wonderful rush of positive energy and long-term pleasure, knowing it’s always there for you. The minus is the hangover that creeps in and leaves you drooling on the floor. In the end, most of us keep dipping into the chocolate because the rush is worth the hangover.

Those demented people who try to get us to stop eating sugar are only interesting in the short term – in the end we all throw caution to the wind and tackle some chocolate.

Such is romance. I think if you can keep it fun and be clear about what you want, the emotional demolition of a bad match can be (relatively) avoided.

My vote here is to enjoy life, eat chocolate, and turn off the news. Stick with the good.

The Uprising

What beautiful love lies ahead for women of a certain age? I have no idea, but I can tell you that here in Ecuador there is always a party happening somewhere. It is the most celebratory culture I have ever witnessed (I’ve lived in seven countries) and joining in has been a jubilant experience.

Am I voting for hedonism? Not really. It’s more like joie de vivre because if you’re anything like me, you have probably been overly responsible and caretaking in your life so a little letting go might be in order. Maybe, just maybe, there is an appetizer in your future, or perhaps a big juicy cheeseburger. (I’m speaking to myself here as well.) Whatever comes your way, be a chocolate bliss magnet, and stay open to possibilities, sisters.

Also read, Not Old Yet: Living Abroad Solo.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How’s your dating life going? Do you even want to date? What funny stories can you share about meeting appetizers?

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Five Tips to Bring Your Makeup Up to Date

Five Tips to Bring Your Make-Up Up to Date

It can be easy to stick to what we know, why update what we have been doing for a lifetime? However, I am very glad I am not still wearing thick, cakey, Pan Stick (who remembers that?) or glued on eye lashes that came unstuck at the edges and hung like spiders :).

In truth, much of today’s makeup has really changed and is simple to apply, long-lasting and may even have some benefits for the skin, something older people are often much more concerned with than the makeup itself.

Start with the Basics

It goes without saying that a good skincare routine provides the best canvas for makeup. Moisturiser and sunscreen should be used every day to keep skin hydrated and protected. 

As we age our eyesight is not what it was, so using a magnified mirror can be a game changer. I remember the first time I used one, I looked like I had aged 20 years overnight. Now I have got used to it, it has become my best friend 🙂

Grooming should also be a part of our routine, making sure eyebrows are neat and tidy (how quick mine seem to grow!) and any odd unwanted hair gently plucked. If you like a minimalist look you may choose to have your eye lashes tinted so you don’t have to bother with mascara.

Foundation

Today’s foundation ranges from light cover, which includes tinted moisturiser, medium cover, which provides a more polished look, through to full cover, which conceals and provides a ‘flawless’ complexion. It can be applied with a brush, sponge, or my preference, fingertips. Try to find a colour that matches your skin, depending on the season of the year.

I have found that mixing a medium cover 50/50 with a base oil/serum, for example castor oil, works best for me. It give a light, even coverage, hydrates my skin and gives a nice glow. It does take a few minutes to dry but is well worth it.

Contour/Bronzer

Contouring has become a big trend recently, and it is easy to see why. Contour sticks make application easy and can be used to reduce the size of your nose, lift cheek bones, sculpt jawline and define the shape of your face. They are typically darker than your skin tone and work by creating shadows.

Bronzers provide a sun-kissed glow and add warmth to the skin, making it look more radiant and healthy. Many people use bronzers without foundation if they want a bare minimum look.

Eyes

Just because we may have a few wrinkles around our eyes doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t wear makeup! In fact, eye makeup can provide a quick pick-me-up and boost confidence. If you are not used to wearing eye makeup, start with some neutral eye shadow colours, and then experiment depending on the occasion, time of year, mood and preferences.

As we age, many of us experience our eye lashes becoming a little shorter and not so thick. One way to make your lashes appear longer and thicker is mascara, and there is a vast number of different types on the market. Choose whether you would like to lengthen, thicken, nourish, or any combination. If you prefer not to use mascara but feel your lashes need a boost, you could consider having them tinted.

Lips

Most of us experience our lips become a little thinner as we get older, this is due to loss of collagen, bone density and elastin. Other than fillers, there is little that can be done to enhance them except keeping them moist, using an SPF lip balm, and eating a nutritious balanced diet.

However, what we can do is work with what we have. Lip liners, drawn just a fraction wider than our lips, can provide definition. Lipsticks, which can be matt or shine, can add colour and vibrancy. Some lip glosses include a plumping ingredient, which can not only add shine, but make them look a little fuller.

Join the Conversation

Have you updated your makeup recently? Do you find makeup boosts your confidence? Have you stopped wearing makeup?

Read More

🌟 Glow On, Gorgeous! 10 Ways to Reignite Skin Health Over 60 – Naturally

🌟 Glow On, Gorgeous! 10 Ways to Reignite Skin Health Over 60 – Naturally

Because radiant skin isn’t about turning back the clock – it’s about turning up your glow.

Let’s be honest: skin changes after 60. It gets thinner, drier, and maybe doesn’t bounce back the way it used to. But here’s the good news – there’s so much you can do to bring back firmness, radiance, and that healthy glow… and you don’t need injections, lasers, or expensive creams to get there.

As a Doctor of Naturopathy and someone who’s spent years living, learning, and loving natural health, I’ve found these 10 habits make the biggest difference – not just in how your skin looks, but how you feel in it.

💧 Hydrate Like You Mean It

Dry, crepey skin is often thirsty skin. Aim to drink half your body weight in ounces of water daily – for example, if you weigh 140 pounds, that’s 70 ounces (about 9 cups). Hydration plumps up skin cells, flushes toxins, and supports elasticity. I’ve found that having a water bottle nearby all day makes a big difference!

🌿 Boost with Vitamin E

I’ve taken 400 IU of vitamin E for years, and the benefits are real. I can actually SEE the difference if I’ve missed a few days – rare, but happens while I’m traveling.

 Vitamin E:

🧬 Say Yes to Collagen

Collagen is the protein that keeps skin firm and elastic – but we lose it naturally with age. I take collagen powder daily in my morning protein drink, and it helps keep my skin smoother, joints stronger, and hair shinier. Look for hydrolyzed collagen from marine or grass-fed sources for best absorption. This is a must have (IMO) for anyone over 40.

♻ Cleanse Your Body of Built-Up Toxins

You can layer on every cream in the world – but if your liver and colon are sluggish, it will show on your skin. Toxins from medications, pollutants, processed foods, and chemicals are eliminated through your detox organs… and when they’re overworked the skin (largest eliminative organ) becomes the canvas of your inner body health!

I cleanse at least twice a year – and after I travel – and the results show up in my skin right away: fewer breakouts, clearer tone, and more radiance. Even adding more bitter greens (like arugula, dandelion, or parsley) or dandelion tea can help support daily detox.

🍇 Eat the Rainbow (and Add Antioxidants)

Your skin loves colorful foods. Bright fruits and vegetables are packed with antioxidants, which fight the free radicals that speed up aging.

Top antioxidant-rich foods:

  • Blueberries
  • Kale and spinach
  • Beets
  • Red bell peppers
  • Pomegranate

Three powerful antioxidant supplements to consider:

🍭 Lower the Sugar, Raise the Glow

Did you know sugar literally ages your skin? It binds to collagen in a process called glycation, causing stiffness, wrinkles, and inflammation. Take a sugar break for a week – you’ll see the amazing differences in a before/after photo! I’ve had clients do this during classes and we marvel at the changes.

Swap refined sugar for:

  • Fresh fruit
  • Stevia or monk fruit
  • Cinnamon (which also balances blood sugar)
  • 70% dark chocolate in moderation

🧘‍♀️ Move, Breathe, Stretch

Your skin loves oxygen. Activities like yoga, walking, and breathwork boost circulation and lymph flow, feeding your skin cells from within. Even more? A calm nervous system means lower cortisol levels, which protects your collagen and keeps your face looking soft and relaxed.

🥑 Feed Your Skin Healthy Fats

Healthy fats are essential for glowing, dewy skin. Omega-3 fatty acids, found in flaxseed, wild salmon, walnuts, and chia seeds, reduce inflammation and help lock in moisture.

If you don’t eat much fish, consider a daily omega-3 supplement – your skin will soak it up.

🧼 Go Gentle on the Outside

Skip the harsh scrubs and soaps. Instead:

  • Cleanse with fragrance-free, pH-balanced products.
  • Use a few drops of rosehip, jojoba, or squalene oil for hydration.
  • Gently exfoliate 1–2 times a week to remove dead skin cells and reveal that fresh layer underneath.
  • Consistency beats complicated routines every time.

💤 Prioritize Your Beauty Sleep

It’s not just a phrase – your skin literally repairs while you sleep. Aim for 7–9 hours a night. Create a sleep sanctuary: cool room, no screens, calming tea, maybe even lavender oil on your pillow. If needed, magnesium can help you unwind. I never go to bed without it and leave two on my nightstand in case I wake up and can’t fall back to sleep easily.

💛 Bonus Tip: Love the Skin You’re In

Confidence is the best glow of all. Take care of your skin because you love yourself, not because you’re trying to chase youth. Consider making your happiness a priority. A peaceful, nourished, joy-filled woman is always beautiful.

A Special Gift for You

Are you feeling out of balance -physically, mentally or emotionally? Then you’re going to love the 5 Pillars of Natural Medicine, a 6-part video series I originally created for my beloved Wise Women of Wellness Community. I’m offering it to you now as a Special Gift – to help you reconnect with your body, restore your energy and begin your healing journey in a way that feels supportive. You’ll also be able to connect with other like-minded women in the Community!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How do you take care of your skin? Do you prefer to use cosmetic products or do you try to keep healthy from the inside out?

Read More

🌟 Glow On, Gorgeous! 10 Ways to Reignite Skin Health Over 60 – Naturally

🌟 Glow On, Gorgeous! 10 Ways to Reignite Skin Health Over 60 – Naturally

Because radiant skin isn’t about turning back the clock – it’s about turning up your glow.

Let’s be honest: skin changes after 60. It gets thinner, drier, and maybe doesn’t bounce back the way it used to. But here’s the good news – there’s so much you can do to bring back firmness, radiance, and that healthy glow… and you don’t need injections, lasers, or expensive creams to get there.

As a Doctor of Naturopathy and someone who’s spent years living, learning, and loving natural health, I’ve found these 10 habits make the biggest difference – not just in how your skin looks, but how you feel in it.

💧 Hydrate Like You Mean It

Dry, crepey skin is often thirsty skin. Aim to drink half your body weight in ounces of water daily – for example, if you weigh 140 pounds, that’s 70 ounces (about 9 cups). Hydration plumps up skin cells, flushes toxins, and supports elasticity. I’ve found that having a water bottle nearby all day makes a big difference!

🌿 Boost with Vitamin E

I’ve taken 400 IU of vitamin E for years, and the benefits are real. I can actually SEE the difference if I’ve missed a few days – rare, but happens while I’m traveling.

 Vitamin E:

🧬 Say Yes to Collagen

Collagen is the protein that keeps skin firm and elastic – but we lose it naturally with age. I take collagen powder daily in my morning protein drink, and it helps keep my skin smoother, joints stronger, and hair shinier. Look for hydrolyzed collagen from marine or grass-fed sources for best absorption. This is a must have (IMO) for anyone over 40.

♻ Cleanse Your Body of Built-Up Toxins

You can layer on every cream in the world – but if your liver and colon are sluggish, it will show on your skin. Toxins from medications, pollutants, processed foods, and chemicals are eliminated through your detox organs… and when they’re overworked the skin (largest eliminative organ) becomes the canvas of your inner body health!

I cleanse at least twice a year – and after I travel – and the results show up in my skin right away: fewer breakouts, clearer tone, and more radiance. Even adding more bitter greens (like arugula, dandelion, or parsley) or dandelion tea can help support daily detox.

🍇 Eat the Rainbow (and Add Antioxidants)

Your skin loves colorful foods. Bright fruits and vegetables are packed with antioxidants, which fight the free radicals that speed up aging.

Top antioxidant-rich foods:

  • Blueberries
  • Kale and spinach
  • Beets
  • Red bell peppers
  • Pomegranate

Three powerful antioxidant supplements to consider:

🍭 Lower the Sugar, Raise the Glow

Did you know sugar literally ages your skin? It binds to collagen in a process called glycation, causing stiffness, wrinkles, and inflammation. Take a sugar break for a week – you’ll see the amazing differences in a before/after photo! I’ve had clients do this during classes and we marvel at the changes.

Swap refined sugar for:

  • Fresh fruit
  • Stevia or monk fruit
  • Cinnamon (which also balances blood sugar)
  • 70% dark chocolate in moderation

🧘‍♀️ Move, Breathe, Stretch

Your skin loves oxygen. Activities like yoga, walking, and breathwork boost circulation and lymph flow, feeding your skin cells from within. Even more? A calm nervous system means lower cortisol levels, which protects your collagen and keeps your face looking soft and relaxed.

🥑 Feed Your Skin Healthy Fats

Healthy fats are essential for glowing, dewy skin. Omega-3 fatty acids, found in flaxseed, wild salmon, walnuts, and chia seeds, reduce inflammation and help lock in moisture.

If you don’t eat much fish, consider a daily omega-3 supplement – your skin will soak it up.

🧼 Go Gentle on the Outside

Skip the harsh scrubs and soaps. Instead:

  • Cleanse with fragrance-free, pH-balanced products.
  • Use a few drops of rosehip, jojoba, or squalene oil for hydration.
  • Gently exfoliate 1–2 times a week to remove dead skin cells and reveal that fresh layer underneath.
  • Consistency beats complicated routines every time.

💤 Prioritize Your Beauty Sleep

It’s not just a phrase – your skin literally repairs while you sleep. Aim for 7–9 hours a night. Create a sleep sanctuary: cool room, no screens, calming tea, maybe even lavender oil on your pillow. If needed, magnesium can help you unwind. I never go to bed without it and leave two on my nightstand in case I wake up and can’t fall back to sleep easily.

💛 Bonus Tip: Love the Skin You’re In

Confidence is the best glow of all. Take care of your skin because you love yourself, not because you’re trying to chase youth. Consider making your happiness a priority. A peaceful, nourished, joy-filled woman is always beautiful.

A Special Gift for You

Are you feeling out of balance -physically, mentally or emotionally? Then you’re going to love the 5 Pillars of Natural Medicine, a 6-part video series I originally created for my beloved Wise Women of Wellness Community. I’m offering it to you now as a Special Gift – to help you reconnect with your body, restore your energy and begin your healing journey in a way that feels supportive. You’ll also be able to connect with other like-minded women in the Community!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How do you take care of your skin? Do you prefer to use cosmetic products or do you try to keep healthy from the inside out?

Read More

Why Mom Guilt Lingers – and What to Do with It Now

Why Mom Guilt Lingers – and What to Do with It Now

There’s a certain kind of silence that falls over the house when your kids are grown. No more soccer practice. No more school pickups. No more late-night snack runs.

But there’s often something else that lingers in that silence: guilt.

For many moms, especially those in their second act of life, mom guilt doesn’t go away – it just evolves. It shifts from “Did I do enough today?” to “Did I mess them up?” It becomes a constant replay of past decisions, old conversations, missed moments, and heartfelt regrets.

Let’s talk about it.

Have Moms Always Felt This Way?

In one form or another, yes. But the weight and shape of mom guilt have changed over time.

Historically, motherhood was rooted in survival: feed, protect, nurture, repeat. The guilt, if it showed up, was about whether a child was safe or cared for.

But in the modern world – especially in the age of parenting books, podcasts, Instagram reels, and expert advice – the expectations have multiplied. Now, we’re not just responsible for keeping our kids alive. We’re expected to raise emotionally fluent, intellectually curious, socially competent, well-adjusted humans who (preferably) adore us in return.

And if they don’t?

If they struggle, rebel, drift away, or express pain from their childhood?

We blame ourselves.

Why Guilt Feels Heavier as We Age

As our kids grow into adults, the mirror turns inward. They may start talking about their childhood differently than we remember it. Or they might be working through their own issues, and we hear the unsaid words: “This is your fault.”

We wonder:

  • Did I listen enough?
  • Did I pass down my own pain?
  • Did I teach them what they needed – or just what I had to give?

We’re left with a haunting question:

Did I get it wrong?

What to Do When the Guilt Creeps In

Here’s what I’ve learned – not from a book, but from living it.

1. Name It – All of It

Don’t bury it. Guilt that festers unspoken becomes shame. Write it down. Speak it out loud. Start a conversation with a therapist, a trusted friend, or your journal.

2. Separate Guilt from Responsibility

Not everything your child struggles with is because of you. Yes, you made mistakes. Every parent does. But you also did the best you could with what you had at the time. Guilt doesn’t change the past – and it shouldn’t steal your present.

3. Apologize – Once; Then Stop Re-Living It

If you genuinely regret something, say so. Acknowledge it. But don’t let it become a never-ending loop of proving you’re sorry. At some point, your grown kids must do their own work. You can’t carry their healing for them.

4. Set Boundaries – Even with Your Kids

You’re allowed to protect your peace. That may mean stepping back from painful conversations, refusing to be emotionally manipulated, or limiting interactions that drain you. Boundaries aren’t walls – they’re bridges to healthier relationships.

5. Redefine What a “Good Mom” Looks Like Now

You’re not shaping lunches and bedtime routines anymore. You’re shaping legacy. That might look like evolving, listening differently, showing up in a new way. It might even look like letting go.

For the Woman in Her Second Act

You can’t rewrite the past – but you can choose how you live the rest of your story.

You are more than the sum of your parenting mistakes.

You are a woman with wisdom, insight, and experience.

And even now, you’re still allowed to grow, repair, and heal – just like your children.

Maybe you need to give yourself the grace no one else ever offered.

Maybe the only person waiting for your forgiveness… is you.

Guilt will come.

But it doesn’t have to stay.

Let it teach you. Then let it go.

I would invite you to do two things today: Get a copy of the Second Act Soul Check-In available here. Then check in at our Empty Nesters Facebook Group. Join the conversation as we deconstruct these complex emotions. You are not alone.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you have your own story about how you have dealt with mom guilt? Please share it below.

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How to Overcome Martyr Syndrome as Women Over 60

How to Overcome Martyr Syndrome as Women Over 60

Women over 60 often find themselves shouldering a disproportionate weight of familial and societal expectations. As a result, many find themselves struggling with a similar, quiet issue: martyr syndrome.

Today’s article delves into the unique challenges faced by older women in battling martyr syndrome.

We offer insights, strategies, and guidance on how to break free from self-sacrifice and cultivate a life driven by personal growth, filled with self-love, appropriate assertiveness, and genuine well-being.

Understanding Martyr Syndrome in Women Over 60

What Is Martyr Syndrome?

Martyr syndrome happens when we constantly sacrifice our happiness for others.

It is a behavioral pattern where we put others’ needs above our own. We may overextend ourselves, saying yes to every request, while neglecting our own needs.

Defined by self-sacrifice, guilt, and an incessant need to please others, martyr syndrome poses significant challenges, especially for older women.

The process to overcome long-standing people-pleasing behaviors that do not serve our best interests can be arduous.

It may require introspection, determination, and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths about our own patterns of self-sacrifice.

But recovery is possible.

Signs and Symptoms of Martyr Syndrome to Recognize

Are you feeling tired all the time?

Resentful when asked for help?

Do you rarely do things just for yourself?

These are signs of martyr syndrome.

Other hints include feeling guilty about setting limits or feeling invisible while caring for others.

The Psychological Impact of Martyr Behavior

When we overextend, we often burn out. Feelings of depression and anxiety creep in. This can cause a loss of identity.

Before long, we may forget what makes us happy.

Martyr syndrome can also damage relationships. Family members may begin to take us for granted or expect help all the time. We might find it hard to say no, causing resentment.

Friendships also suffer because we’re too busy or too tired to connect. Over time, this strain makes loneliness worse.

Constant giving can lower self-esteem. When we depend too much on others’ approval, our mental health may suffer as stress builds up.

If not addressed, martyr syndrome risks more serious problems like chronic illness or depression.

We need to do whatever it takes to overcome martyr syndrome and get free – both for our own good, and to benefit all the others who love us, too.

It is not easy, but it can be done!

Why is Martyr Syndrome so Challenging for Women over 60?

Many of us face new life changes after 60.

Maybe we have stepped back from our careers or shifted caregiving roles. Perhaps we are facing health issues.

Family dynamics change as children grow or leave home. These shifts can also leave some of us feeling invisible or overwhelmed.

And it’s easy to fall into the trap of putting everyone else first.

Especially since society often expects us to remain nurturing and accommodating of others, even in the face of increased needs for self-care and rest.

It’s Challenging to Overcome Long-standing Behaviors

Overcoming martyr syndrome can also be particularly challenging for us as women over 60 due to the often deeply ingrained nature of our behaviors.

Years of societal conditioning, caregiving roles, and societal expectations often contribute to the normalization of self-sacrifice as a virtue, making it difficult to break the habit of putting others first.

Long-standing behaviors associated with martyr syndrome can be deeply rooted in our identity, shaping our decisions, relationships, and overall well-being.

The fear of change and the discomfort of stepping into unfamiliar territory can also impede our progress as work to overcome martyr syndrome.

As we begin to reinvent ourselves, set boundaries, and prioritize self-care, we may also grapple with feelings of guilt, anxiety, and resistance.

But despite all of these challenges, there is hope for us as women over 60.

We have the strength, the wisdom, the experience, and the determination to do anything we set our minds to – including overcoming martyr syndrome!

We Can Overcome Martyr Syndrome as Women over 60

By acknowledging the detrimental impact of self-sacrifice on our well-being, seeking support from trusted allies or mental health professionals, and investing time in self-discovery, we can gradually unravel the layers of martyr syndrome that have masked our authentic selves.

Through introspection, self-compassion, and a commitment to personal growth, we can rewrite our narratives, redefine our boundaries, and cultivate a life that honors our inherent worth and resilience.

We can reclaim not only our autonomy but also boost our feelings of self-worth and inner peace.

How to Recognize and Break Free from Martyr Syndrome as Women over 60

Start by noticing your habits. Keep a journal or pick quiet moments to think about how often you say yes. Are certain situations or people triggers?

Recognizing these cues makes change easier. Mindfulness exercises also help us stay aware of our feelings.

Many of us believe we’re only worthy if we help others. Reframe this idea.

Our worth isn’t tied to how much we give.

Therapists may encourage us by asking us to say to ourselves, “You deserve care too.”

Replacing guilt with self-compassion helps us regain control.

Set clear boundaries. Practice saying no politely but firmly.

Learning to speak up without guilt is key. Practice simple phrases like, “I need rest today,” or “I can’t help with this right now.”

Role playing with friends or a coach may help boost your confidence. Embrace being more assertive as you learn to protect your own well-being.

How to Rebuild Our Identity and Establish Healthy Boundaries

Equally important: begin to say yes to things that serve you.

Schedule time just for things you love to do. Think back to what you used to love. Pick up hobbies that bring you joy: the arts, gardening, music, yoga, community service. Join local groups or online clubs to meet women who share your interests.

Community and Social Support

Find support groups for women over 60 or caregivers. Speaking with others who understand your journey can help you feel less alone.

Professional help from therapists or life coaches trained in aging issues can provide guidance. Sharing stories and advice may open new paths to healing.

Local community centers or senior centers often host events for women over 60. Joining these groups can help you build, rebuild or restore your social life.

Online forums may also give you a space to share stories and get advice. Building connections any way you can will help strengthen your sense of belonging.

How to Overcome Martyr Syndrome as Women over 60

The path to overcoming martyr syndrome as a woman over 60 may be fraught with challenges, but it is a process that promises liberation and a renewed sense of self.

Knowing how martyr syndrome impacts our life opens the door to change. Recognizing and confronting the deeply ingrained behaviors that no longer serve us and understanding the emotional toll of martyr syndrome are the first steps.

By recognizing the value of setting boundaries, practicing self-compassion, and seeking support when needed, we can reclaim our identity and happiness.

Breaking free from martyr syndrome not only liberates us from the burden of self-sacrifice but also enables us to embrace our worth, prioritize self-care, and pursue our passions with unapologetic zeal and newfound joy.

Thank you as always for reading.

Let’s Start a Conversation:

Does the concept of martyr syndrome resonate with you? Do you have strategies that you have used to prioritize your own needs appropriately?

What outlets have you found most useful to meet other women and become involved in either community service or hobbies? Do you have a success story you can share?

In which situations do you find it most difficult to say no? What tactics will you be prepared to use the next time an undesirable request comes your way?

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49 Best Gifts for Crafters

gifts for crafters

There’s no better way to show appreciation for the dedicated crafters in our lives than by gifting them something that inspires and enhances their artistic endeavors. Whether they’re seasoned artisans or just beginning to explore their creative side, the right gift can make a world of difference in their crafting journey.

Unfortunately, finding the perfect gift isn’t always easy. You want to give them something unique and useful, not just another item they already have. If your special someone is a crafter, fear not! There’s a treasure trove of supplies and kits available that would make fantastic gifts to nurture their creative spirit.

Here are my top 10 picks for crafters:

  1. High-Quality Crafting Scissors – Every crafter always needs scissors.
  2. Cricut Explore 3 – Help them make vinyl decals, stickers, and more.
  3. Gift Card – You can never go wrong with a gift card to Michaels or another craft store.
  4. Ergonomic Crochet Hooks – Make their crochet sessions more comfortable.
  5. Miniature Model Kit – Explore the magic of miniatures.
  6. Handlettering Set – Introduce them to the beauty of handlettering.
  7. Digital Drawing Tablet – Add digital art to their repertoire.
  8. Mosaic Tile Kit – Create stunning art with ceramic tiles.
  9. Watercolor Paint Set – Unleash their inner artist.
  10. Metal Stamping Kit – Customize keychains, bracelets, and more.

Gifts Any Crafter Will Love

From essential tools and materials to unique accessories, I’ve included something for nearly every type of crafter, no matter their preferred medium. So let’s dive in and discover the perfect gift to celebrate the creativity of the crafters we admire and love.

1. High-Quality Crafting Scissors

Crafters use scissors for various projects, making high-quality crafting scissors essential. With sharp blades and ergonomic handles, these scissors provide comfort and control, allowing crafters to work effortlessly for hours on end.

2. Cricut Explore 3

Take crafting to the next level with the Cricut Explore 3, a cutting machine that offers unparalleled versatility and precision. This device cuts various materials, including vinyl, cardstock, fabric, and even wood, making it perfect for creating all sorts of custom crafts.

3. Gift Card

For the crafter who loves the freedom to choose their own supplies, a gift card to their favorite craft store is a thoughtful and versatile option. Whether they need new yarn for a knitting project or colorful paint for their next masterpiece, this gift allows them to indulge in their creative pursuits.

4. Ergonomic Crochet Hooks

Crochet enthusiasts will appreciate the comfort of ergonomic crochet hooks. These hooks feature soft, ergonomic handles that reduce hand fatigue, making it easier for crafters to work on yarn projects without discomfort.

5. Miniature Model Kit

A miniature model kit is the perfect gift for crafters who love intricate details and challenging projects. These kits allow them to recreate detailed replicas of buildings and more, providing an interesting and engaging crafting experience.

6. Hand Lettering Set

Inspire their creativity with a hand lettering set featuring a selection of high-quality pens, markers, and practice sheets. As they explore the art of beautiful lettering, they’ll learn how to add artistic flair to greeting cards, bullet journals, and other projects.

7. Digital Drawing Tablet

A digital drawing tablet opens up a new world of digital creativity for artists and crafters. This versatile tool allows crafters to create digital illustrations, graphic designs, and digital art.

8. Mosaic Tile Kit

Introduce your favorite crafter to captivating mosaic art with a mosaic tile kit. Complete with all the supplies they need, these kits allow crafters to create stunning mosaic designs on various surfaces, from picture frames to stepping stones.

9. Watercolor Paint Set

Any artist will enjoy and appreciate a high-quality watercolor paint set. With a range of vibrant colors and high-quality pigments, these sets allow crafters to achieve stunning watercolor effects and create beautiful works of art.

10. Metal Stamping Kit

Help your gift recipient delve into metal stamping with a comprehensive metal stamping kit. With one of these kits, they can create personalized jewelry, keychains, and embellishments by impressing designs and letters onto metal surfaces.

11. Heat Press

A heat press is an excellent gift for crafters who love working with heat transfer vinyl and sublimation. This versatile tool allows them to create personalized t-shirts, tote bags, and other custom projects with ease.

12. Quilting Supplies

Quilting enthusiasts always appreciate the gift of essential quilting supplies. From rotary cutters and quilting rulers to colorful fabrics and quilting threads, these supplies equip crafters with everything they need for their quilting journey.

13. Origami Paper Set

Crafters who enjoy the art of folding paper will love a set of colorful origami papers. With various patterns and colors, this set allows them to easily create intricate paper folds and designs.

14. DIY Candle-Making Kit

Help your loved one tap into the craft of creating soothing candles with a DIY candle-making kit. Complete with wax, wicks, fragrance oils, and containers, these kits empower crafters to make personalized candles that add a warm touch to any space.

Read 5 CANDLE-MAKING STARTER KITS FOR BEGINNERS.

15. Pottery Wheel Kit

A pottery wheel kit is a dream come true for anyone interested in pottery and ceramics. This kit includes a mini pottery wheel and sculpting tools, allowing crafters to create unique clay masterpieces.

16. Cross-Stitch Kit

For those with an eye for detail and a love for needlework, a cross-stitch kit is an accessible and rewarding crafting experience. With pre-printed patterns and colorful threads, these kits provide all the essentials to create beautiful and intricate cross-stitch designs.

17. Metal Clay Kit

Metal clay kits are perfect for crafters interested in jewelry-making. With metal clay, they can sculpt and shape their designs before firing them, resulting in unique and beautiful metal jewelry pieces.

18. Art Markers Set

Help them add vibrant colors to their artistic creations with high-quality art markers. With the right markers, crafters can achieve smooth and consistent lines that are ideal for illustration, coloring, and mixed-media projects.

19. Woodburning Kit

A woodburning kit is a fantastic gift if you’re looking for a new project for your friend to try. With a woodburning pen and a variety of interchangeable tips, plus stencils and heat-resistant gloves, this kit allows crafters to create intricate designs and patterns on wood surfaces.

20. Embossing Heat Tool

Enhance their paper crafting projects with an embossing heat tool. This handy tool heats embossing powder, creating raised and shiny designs on cards, invitations, and other paper crafts.

21. DIY Screen Printing Kit

Unlock the world of screen printing with a DIY screen printing kit. Your recipient can print custom designs on clothing, tote bags, and other fabric items while exploring this versatile and exciting craft.

22. Acrylic Paint Set

Artists and crafters alike will appreciate a versatile acrylic paint set. With a wide range of colors and fast-drying properties, these acrylic paints are perfect for canvas painting, rock art, and other endeavors.

23. Scrapbooking Supplies

Help your friend or loved one preserve precious memories with a collection of scrapbooking supplies. From patterned papers and embellishments to stickers and paper photo frames, these supplies will inspire crafters to create beautiful and meaningful scrapbook layouts.

24. Craft Storage Solutions

Keeping craft supplies organized can be tricky. Gift practical craft storage solutions to help your recipient keep everything neat and tidy. From storage bins and shelves to stackable containers, organizers ensure they can access their supplies easily and maintain a clutter-free workspace.

25. Leather Crafting Kit

Introduce the art of leather crafting with a comprehensive leather crafting kit. Crafters can create beautiful leather accessories like wallets, keychains, and bracelets, adding a rustic touch to their style.

26. Jewelry-Making Kit

A jewelry-making kit is a perfect choice for crafters who love accessories. With various beads, findings, and tools, these kits empower crafters to design and create unique and stylish accessories.

27. Loom Weaving Kit

Explore weaving with a loom kit that provides everything needed to create stunning woven tapestries and wall hangings. Your favorite crafter can experiment with different textures and colors, bringing their artistic visions to life through weaving with one of these kits.

28. Personalized Labels

Help them add a personal touch to their handmade creations with personalized labels. Crafters will appreciate this thoughtful addition to their toolkit and think of you whenever they sell or give one of their completed projects as a gift.

29. Craft-Themed Coffee Mug

Boost their crafting enthusiasm with a fun and stylish craft-themed coffee mug. Whether adorned with charming illustrations or witty quotes, these mugs make a delightful addition to any crafter’s collection.

30. Resin Starter Kit

Introduce the crafter in your life to the mesmerizing world of resin art with a resin starter kit. This kit provides all the essential components, including resin, hardener, and molds, to create stunning resin jewelry.

31. Sewing Machine

Experienced seamsters and beginners alike will love the gift of a sewing machine. A sewing machine with multiple stitch patterns opens up a world of creative possibilities for garment-making, home decor, and more and will surely delight any crafter.

32. Diamond Art Kit

Give your special someone a diamond art kit to help them create dazzling artwork using resin “diamonds.” This captivating and relaxing craft produces shimmering, mosaic-like masterpieces that add elegance to any room.

32. Polymer Clay Kit

A polymer clay kit provides a colorful and versatile medium for crafters who love sculpting and jewelry-making. With a wide array of vibrant colors, crafters can mix and blend the clay to achieve their desired shades and bring their imaginative creations to life.

33. Needle Felting Kit

Unleash creativity with a needle felting kit that allows your crafter to create adorable wool sculptures. Using felting needles, they can shape wool into charming characters and decorative pieces.

Also read our guide, Is Needle Felting on Your Hobbies Bucket List? Let’s Get Started!

34. Calligraphy Starter Set

Introduce them to the art of beautiful writing with a calligraphy starter set. Complete with various calligraphy pens and nibs, along with an exercise booklet and instructional guides, this set provides aspiring calligraphers with everything they need to develop their skills.

35. Arts & Crafts Subscription Box

Gift the crafter who always loves trying something new a regularly delivered surprise with an arts and crafts subscription box. Each box is curated around a specific theme or crafting technique, offering fresh inspiration and materials for a wide range of projects.

36. Woobles Crochet Kit

Encourage creativity with a charming Woobles crochet kit, which teaches beginners how to create adorable amigurumi animals. Complete with all the necessary materials, including yarn, a crochet hook, stuffing, safety eyes, and video instructions, this kit makes crafting whimsical characters a breeze.

37. Soap Making Kit

Your crafter will enjoy exploring the art of soap-making with a comprehensive soap-making kit. Complete with soap bases, fragrances, colors, and molds, a kit enables them to design beautiful and nourishing handmade soaps.

Read BEGINNER’S GUIDE TO SOAPMAKING.

38. Stained Glass Kit

Send them on a captivating journey into the art of stained glass crafting with a stained glass kit. Crafters will appreciate the colorful glass pieces, tools, and patterns that allow them to create intricate and vibrant stained glass pieces.

Read HOW TO MAKE STAINED GLASS.

39. Crafting Class

Gift the opportunity to learn new techniques and enhance their skills with a crafting class. Whether it’s pottery, jewelry-making, or watercolor painting, these classes offer valuable experiences that will enrich their crafting journey. If you pay for them to attend a local class, you could even go with and spend the day together.

40. Craft-Themed Shirt

Let your much-loved crafter proudly display their passion with a craft-themed shirt. Featuring witty slogans, illustrations, or clever crafting-related designs, crafty shirts are a stylish and personalized addition to any crafter’s wardrobe.

41. Knitting/Crochet Bag

A practical and thoughtful gift, a knitting or crochet bag offers ample space and pockets for fiber artists to carry their projects on the go. With these bags, crafters can stay organized and inspired wherever they venture.

42. Interchangeable Knitting Needles

Any knitter would appreciate the versatility and convenience of interchangeable needles. These sets come with a wide range of needle sizes, making them ideal for various knitting projects and ensuring a smooth and enjoyable experience.

43. Macrame Kit

A macrame kit provides all the necessary materials and step-by-step instructions for those interested in creating intricate designs from knots. Crafters can use this kit to create beautiful macrame wall hangings, plant hangers, and more.

Also read, How to Make a Macrame Plant Hanger.

44. Desk Lamp

Provide optimal lighting for their crafting projects with a practical desk lamp. Adjustable brightness levels and various modes ensure that crafters have adequate illumination and reduced eye strain, enabling them to work comfortably and with enhanced precision.

45. Cordless Glue Gun

Streamline their projects with a versatile cordless glue gun. Perfect for working on crafting projects on the go or in any workspace, this gift allows crafters to glue various materials without being tethered to an electrical outlet.

46. Punch Needle Embroidery Kit

Punch needle embroidery is a satisfying and therapeutic craft that’s growing in popularity. Kits include monk’s cloth, yarn, a hoop, and the punch needle tool itself. It’s a great choice for someone who enjoys both fiber arts and home decor. Finished pieces can become pillows, wall art, or even rugs.

Read our guide, How to Punch Needle: A Beginner’s Guide.

47. Bookbinding Starter Kit

For the crafter who loves stationery or journaling, a bookbinding kit opens up a new avenue of creativity. These sets come with awls, bone folders, waxed thread, and pre-cut covers – ideal for crafting handmade journals or sketchbooks from scratch.

48. Fabric Tie-Dyeing Kit 

Let them explore color and pattern with a fabric tie-dyeing kit. These kits usually include indigo dye, rubber bands, gloves, and instructions for classic folding techniques. A great pick for textile lovers or those into slow fashion.

Also read, How to Get Started with Tie-Dye.

49. Craft Apron with Tool Pockets

Sometimes overlooked, a durable, multi-pocketed craft apron can be a game-changer. Look for ones made of canvas or denim with designated slots for scissors, pens, glue sticks, or knitting tools. This is especially useful for messy projects or keeping supplies close while moving between stations.

These carefully selected gifts are bound to ignite joy and creativity in the heart of the crafter you cherish. They will remember your support for their artistic pursuits as they enjoy their favorite hobby or embark on new creative journeys with your gifts. Happy gifting!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What’s the best craft-related gift you’ve ever received? What’s the worst? What gift do you wish someone would give you?

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Is Pilates Strength Training? Yes, and Here’s Why!

strength training pilates

Traditional strength training and Pilates have a lot in common. Loading the muscles with weights in traditional strength training and with springs, props, and body weight in Pilates puts forces onto the muscles and bones that build strength.

Both are great for you and necessary for all the cells in the body to do their work. Different loads on our tissues help encourage strength and resiliency while optimizing the functioning of every system in the body.

We know that it’s important to include strength training in our movement routines. But what exactly does that entail? There are so many mixed messages coming to us in the fitness world, and it can be really confusing to understand what is what.

You don’t have to hit the gym and pump iron to build strength (but you should if that’s what you love!). A Pilates session can be a whole body workout that includes emphasis on strength and so much more.

Does Pilates Count as Strength Training?

Yes, Pilates counts as strength training. At every age and stage of life, the forces we put on our bones help us maintain our muscle and bone health to minimize loss as we age. Not only that, a strong body encourages a healthy metabolism which helps all the systems of the body function well.

We also know that in order to strengthen the muscles, progressive load increases are important. This is true for general muscle strengthening and particularly for people who are trying to build bone strength.

In my 25 years as a Pilates and fitness instructor, I’ve learned that new clients are commonly confused because they don’t fully understand what Pilates entails. Some people have only done mat classes where the focus is usually on exercises using just body weight.

Sometimes they will be familiar with adding props like hand weights and therabands in their mat class to increase resistance. But many have never been on the specialized Pilates equipment which offers customizable spring-based resistance such as the Reformer, Cadillac, or Chair.

In traditional strength training with weights, the focus is on a particular muscle or set of muscles. Let’s say your biceps, for example. In order to strengthen them, you do 2-3 sets of biceps curls with enough weight that you are just able to finish the set with good form.

You are initiating the physiological process that strengthens the muscle, which actually happens later as the tissue rebuilds. There is more involved, but this is generally what happens and that is why rest days are important.

Traditionally, you would have a leg day and an arm day at the gym so that you are allowing for this rebuilding of the tissue in between. Other types of strength training use body weight resistance (i.e., a plank), light hand weights, therabands, or suspension trainers.

Pilates is a whole body workout that builds strength as well as balanced mobility and stability through all the joints in the body. So you are not only controlling the movement against the spring resistance, you are moving through various planes of motion and ranges.

It’s All in the Details with Pilates

Traditional strength training often focuses on loading our global movers, or bigger muscles. In Pilates, we do a lot of work on the local stabilizing muscles close to the joints which helps us build functional strength.

We’re working to be strong in our activities of daily life doing the things that we love. And, because Pilates is tailored to the unique needs of each person, the focus is on helping the individual get what they want out of their training. Usually, that means a range of strengthening exercises and includes a combination of strength, mobility, and stability training.

What Are the Benefits of Strength Training?

Pilates, when done using equipment and props, can encompass all the types of strength training we need and more. Here are some of the benefits of using Pilates for strength training.

Whole Body Strength and Balanced Mobility

Pilates is a whole body balanced workout that can include progressive strength training tailored to your unique needs. We look at the mechanics of how each person moves and find ways to support creating strength in the whole system. This approach also helps prevent injuries.

Training for Your Unique Body and Life

Pilates can help you unravel and understand the unique needs of your body. Your genetic structure and lifestyle both inform how the forces of movement impact your body. A certified Pilates trainer can use this information to help you build strength safely and efficiently tailored to your own body and activities.

A Strong Mind-Body Connection

You build your own awareness by paying attention to breathing, how you are moving, and what you are feeling when you move. This practice of noticing is one that helps you calm your nervous system and become more attuned to what your body needs. It improves your form and allows you to focus on what you are trying to do in each exercise.

Moving in Multiple Planes of Motion

Building strength is not about spending an hour here or two hours there doing big, hard, explosive exercises that leave you exhausted and sore. To build muscle, you need to find a starting point that works for you and do that movement consistently every day through multiple planes of motion.

Choosing exercises in all planes of motion helps us maintain balance in our body by working not only the big, global movers but also the smaller load stabilizing muscles.

Improved Overall Health

A strong body positively impacts all the systems of the body to function optimally. It helps strengthen bones, boost metabolism, improves cardiac health, and can help manage chronic conditions. Strength training can improve your quality of life by preventing injury, making the activities of daily life easier, and even enhancing your mental focus.

How to Incorporate Strength Training into Your Workout Routine

To incorporate strength training into your workout routine, start by thinking about what you want to accomplish. What do you want the impact of your strength training to be? Do you want to be strong enough to work in the garden without getting sore? Or do you want to mitigate the effects of osteoporosis or osteopenia? Think about what a strong body will allow you to do.

Once that is clear, you can set your goals for a regular strength training routine. Pilates sessions and classes can be done 3-5 days a week for optimal benefit. You can do private training or small group classes on the Tower, Reformer, or Chair.

You can also supplement that training with online mat classes that use body weight or simple props to build strength. My studio MOVE Wellness has a free YouTube channel with a variety of Pilates workouts that you can explore. Try the one I’ve included above!

Give Pilates a Try!

If you’re interested in strength training, Pilates is a great workout to incorporate into your routine. Strength training is one piece of the movement pie that should include a variety of forces on the body. We know that our bodies are meant to do a vast range of movements. Bending, stretching, squatting, running, sitting on the floor, resting… all those motions are included in our daily lives.

Pilates will help you build strength, balance and mobility in a way that supports all the activities of your day to day life.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What type of exercises do you include in your routine? Do you take time to do strength training? Have you considered or even tried Pilates? What can you share about your experience?

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