When your cell phone rang and you saw the call was from your son or daughter, you were full of heart fluttering anticipation. You had been waiting so long to hear the words, “Mom, you are going to be a grandmother.”

Immediately, you began to have visions of cuddling a new baby. Trips to the park. Bedtime stories. Spoiling your grandchild as only a grandmother can do and get away with it.

As the pregnancy months wore on, you bought adorable baby clothes and the cutest educational baby toys.

Then, your world and that of your son or daughter, stopped. The call may have come during the pregnancy or the news was only shared after the birth.

Your grandchild had been born different. It may have been a cleft palate; a missing limb; spina bifida or any one of hundreds of birth defects you have never heard of.

How You Can Help Your Children Cope

Your first questions were: “Why did this happen? How can I help? What does this mean for my grandchild’s future?”

Your son or daughter will be dealing with so many issues and so much stress that you can help by becoming their liaison to information and resources.

First, you can learn more about your grandchild’s condition. At Birth Defect Research for Children (BDRC) you can download a fact sheet that will give you easy-to-understand information about your grandchild’s condition.

If your grandchild has a very rare condition, you may also want to contact the National Organization for Rare Disorders that also has fact sheets on uncommon genetic and chromosomal disorders.

The Importance of Connections

Often, the best way to help your children cope with a child that has been born different is to connect with other families who have children with the same conditions.

You can find many support groups on Facebook and the Support Group Center at the BDRC. Connecting with other families who have been through – or are going through – the same challenges can be the most important way to move forward.

There’s also a national Parent Matching Program that can link your family to others who have children with the same conditions. The Genetic Alliance is another good resource that can connect you to advocacy programs and resources for genetic conditions.

Why My Child? Every Parent’s Question

Then there is the “why” of birth defects. Every mother, father, and grandparent asks, “Why did this happen?” It is a natural question and not to be dismissed lightly since “every birth defect has a cause.”

Some birth defects are genetic and may be inherited through autosomal dominant, autosomal recessive, or X-linked modes.

The majority of birth defects (up to 80%), however, are not genetic, although genetic predisposition may play a part. These birth defects may be caused by many factors: maternal illnesses like diabetes; viruses; nutritional deficiencies; exposure to certain medications, radiation, or environmental toxins.

Families who are asking why their child or grandchild was born with birth defects can enter their case in the National Birth Defect Registry, an online research project developed by seven scientists to help identify the unknown causes of birth defects.

Practical Advice

Your acceptance is the most important way to help your grandchild with physical differences build self-esteem. When other children ask uncomfortable questions, the best course of action is to be very matter-of-fact.

Explain that this is just the way your grandchild was born. You will learn that many children without birth defects are concerned about their differences too.

Once, I was asked to speak to all the first grade classes at a nearby school. A young lady with an arm missing from just below the elbow had been transferred in after the start of the school year. The other children were teasing her, especially on the playground when all the first grade classes were together.

I thought and thought about how I could get the other kids to see that she wasn’t really that different from them.

Goldilocks and the Three Bears

Then, I had an idea. I am blonde (Goldilocks) and used to teach kindergarten, so I knew nursery stories (Goldilocks and the Three Bears) could be very instructive. I bought three teddy bears. I put glasses on one, a makeshift hearing aid on another, and I shortened one arm on the third bear.

I put the bears in a red wagon and off to school I went. All the kids could relate to the bear that wore glasses. Many kids also had a grandparent with a hearing aid.

When I talked about the bear with the short arm, I passed out pictures of kids with short arms riding bikes, in Halloween costumes, at ballet recitals, doing regular kid things.

Then I explained that some kids are born needing glasses or a hearing aid or with a short arm. How would they feel if the other kids made fun them?

A little boy with bright red hair raised his hand. He said, “I know just how they feel. The other kids make fun of my hair.”

After that day, the little girl with the short arm didn’t have any more problems on the playground. You can help make this happen for your grandchild. It’s all about perception and acceptance.

Do you know a child who was born different? What is their disability? Is the child in your family? Have you looked for information to help the parents cope? What resources did you find? Have you reached out to organizations to provide assistance with school adaptation? Please share your experience and any practical advice that you have.

You have spent years learning about how to “save” for retirement. Save first, spend later. Dollar Cost Averaging. Asset allocation and rebalancing.

In the United States, you have put money into your IRA, or your employer sponsored plans, and contributed to Social Security. You have built equity in your home or your business has prospered.

This is not a column about my beliefs around how the retirement narrative is changing, and we need to prepare for a world we won’t recognize.

However, there will be a time in life when you need to ebb away from “saving” into “spending” as your life season changes. You need to shift from a “pile” mentality to a “payment” mindset where your retirement savings are concerned.

Two Pronged Approach

Moving forward, you need to create an income strategy to address liquidity needs, lifestyle desires, longevity uncertainty, and legacy efficiencies. As we are still immersed in a Covid haze, a simple, small step to look at an income strategy for 2022 will empower you.

How Much?

A good way to look at income planning in your retirement years is this: how much do you need to receive for a paycheck and how much for a “playcheck”?

Paycheck

This is discerning between financial needs and desires and you want to address each separately. What are your fixed expenses? Roof over your head, food on your table, clothes on your back. Out of pocket medical, insurance premiums, and other expenses are necessities.

Everyone has different perspectives on what is considered as “necessary.” It is your personal journey of discernment. You do want to make sure that your necessary expenses are covered by guaranteed income sources so that you can sustain them no matter how long you live.

Social Security, pensions, and annuities can provide you with lifetime income.

Playcheck

Then there is the “playcheck.” What are the desires you want to incorporate in your life? Again, some have more, others have less.

An exercise I walk clients through is aligning their spending choices with their core values. You want to be intentional with your spending, which is getting more difficult every day. Once you break how much you need for next year, you want to look at where it will come from.

Where From?

Picture buckets of assets – both financial capital and human capital. For 2021, if you are retired (fully or partially) and have connected with what your fixed and variable expenses are, the next step is to maximize what you can get out of each bucket.

Financial Capital

Financial capital are the assets you have built up over a lifetime. Retirement accounts, brokerage accounts, home equity, rental real estate, business assets, life insurance cash value, annuities, Social Security, pensions, to name a few.

Human Capital

Human capital would include the opportunity to earn income in some way. This may include part time work or engaging in the “gig” economy.

How Is Each Taxed?

These buckets are not created equal! There are taxation elements of turning on a spigot from any of these.

Taking income from an IRA is taxed as ordinary income. A Roth IRA comes to you tax free. Cash values from insurance policies can be accessed tax efficiently. If you sell your primary residence, you can take $500,000 in gain if you are filing jointly, or $250,000 in gain filing single, tax free.

You want to consider what tax environment we are in. Right now, we have low tax rates. With Covid and possible administration changes, the taxation of these buckets may change.

The Future of Your Retirement Savings

What you take and where you take it from impacts the long-term sustainability of your assets. It is no longer just a matter of having them, it is knowing how to optimize the income you can receive from them.

Stay strategic and intentional, educated and empowered. This leads to freedom to pursue your passions and purpose as you live out this fulfilling time of life.

Have you saved up enough for retirement? Are you ready to begin spending? Have you balanced your capital wisely? Are you prepared to optimize the long-term sustainability of your assets? Please share your experience with the community and tell us what it will take you to turn your retirement upside down.

There are products that have been with us since childhood. You know just where to find them on the shelf, in the grocery store, in the pharmacy or wherever you and your family shop. Or, do you?

In grocery shopping over the past months, I would casually browse through the cereal aisle looking for the orange Wheaties box, a cereal I have been eating and enjoying since childhood. Not seeing it on the shelf, I wasn’t particularly alarmed. But shopping at another local grocery, I had the same experience.

What’s to Love About Wheaties

The flavor and crunch of these wheat and bran flakes has appealed to me since childhood. I’m fortunate that my parents didn’t spoil their children with sweet snacks and cereals. That enjoyment of a healthy cereal stayed with me.

The second reason was the appearance of an athlete on every box. While crunching away at the cereal, we read about the latest athlete who was pictured.

Wheaties History

Wheaties, like many great product inventions, was born out of an accidental cooking spill that occurred, oh, about a hundred years ago. Its early marketing included “the breakfast of champions.” As mentioned, an outstanding athlete was featured on every box.

Where Have the Wheaties Gone?

After shopping in vain at my local grocery stores, I began to wonder. Have my Wheaties disappeared from the market?

I took to the internet to find my Wheaties. There were three chains where I don’t usually shop that carry them. I was greatly relieved, but still concerned that my favorite brand isn’t front and center at my local grocery.

Well, I began researching further. In looking around the internet, I saw that other searchers had been asking that same question. Market share may be part of the answer.

 Wikipedia says Wheaties sales fell 78% between 2005 and 2014.

Business Insider reports that Wheaties sales have fallen to .5% of sales for General Mills. In Melanie Hicken’s 2012 article for the publication, she surmises that Wheaties isn’t healthy enough for those looking for only healthy foods, and not sweet enough for the junk food lovers.

It’s not surprising that a product that has been around for 100 years would fluctuate in demand. Plus, the number of cereals available on our shelves is mind-numbing. There are new names of brightly colored boxes of sugary sweet junk food disguised as cereals. There are also, new to the market, scads of ‘healthy’ cereals that are nudging off the shelf the beautiful orange box of crispy wheat and bran.

100-Year Anniversary for Wheaties

But wait, that’s enough of spilled milk from your Wheaties bowl. I’ve also learned that General Mills is celebrating the 100-year anniversary of Wheaties by issuing a series of commemorative boxes throughout the year.

The first box featured a young Muhammed Ali. That box is now sitting on my kitchen counter.

The Wheaties website is also featuring a number of athletic clothing and other products to feature athletes and the Wheaties brand.

In a recent article, Businesswire covers the launch of the anniversary celebration. The quote below from the article explains the historic intertwining of this iconic cereal and the athlete icons it celebrates:

“Wheaties redefined what it means to be a Champion by reserving its cover for trailblazing athletes who use their sports platforms for something greater. Its culture-defining, collectible boxes showcased that greatness could happen on and off the field and boldly gave a national stage to athletes’ causes.”

Perhaps that explains why I and so many other kids devoured the portraits and background information on the athletes featured on Wheaties boxes.

It Isn’t Just About the Wheaties

As we baby boomers age, marketers are seeing a waning group who may have a lot of purchase power, but there are fewer of us than five or ten years ago. Will the products we have enjoyed, benefited from, and supported through our purchases over the years slowly disappear from the market? Is the Wheaties box just the first blow?

Thankfully, General Mills is continuing to carry Wheaties and in fact celebrate its longevity.

So, let’s celebrate with them. Eat your Wheaties!

If your life-long favorite product is beginning to disappear from the market, what do you do? Do you explore where it may still be found? Do you contact the manufacturer and lobby for continued manufacture of your product?

There comes a time in every adult person’s life where a sale so good comes around, you have no choice but to drop everything—and I mean everything—that you have on your schedule and sprint to checkout as fast as your beautiful legs will carry you. Now, my dear friends, is that time because practically every La Mer skincare product that you’ve ever dreamed of buying (but haven’t due to the large price tag) is secretly on sale.

This huge savings event is at Rue La La, a skincare and fashion haven for beauty and style lovers alike. This spot is like Verishop, in that you can score huge discounts on designer items with no strings attached. All you have to do is make an account (all it takes is adding your email and a password), and you’re off to the savings races. The site never lets us down when it comes to sales, but honestly, it might have outdone itself with this La Mer one.

RELATED: 14,000 Shoppers Swear By This ‘Miracle Cream’ That Treats Dark Spots & Acne Scars In A Few Days

Everything, from the iconic Creme De La Mer moisturizer that Kim Kardashian swears by, to the Lifting Eye Serum that Chrissy Teigen uses to decrease under-eye bags and fine lines, is discounted. Want to know the last time we saw all of these La Mer essentials on sale under the same URL? In our dreams. Five years ago. 

So, if we haven’t made the case for urgency already, here’s our final plea: If you have ever been interested in shopping the most iconic and luxurious skincare brand on the market, but have been waiting for a sign to do it, this is your big, red, 100-foot-wide sign. Go get that discount and go get that moisturizer before it sells out!

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

Courtesy: La Mer.

Creme De La Mer

If you’ve ever wondered what the fountain of youth looks like, it’s this cream. Every celeb who looks like they’ve somehow mastered aging gracefully uses this lotion, including Kim Kardashian and Jenifer Lopez. Rest assured knowing that a lot of this two-ounce jar will go a long way, and now that it’s marked down by $35, it’s as good a time as any to test it out.

Courtesy: La Mer.

The Lifting Eye Serum

This impactful serum boosts your skin’s microcirculation to smooth out your under-eye area and decreased the appearance of bags and wrinkles, while lifting and tightening the area at the same time. All you need is one drop to see the difference.

Courtesy: La Mer.

The Moisturizing Cool Gel Cream

Feel like you’re receiving a luxe spa treatment every time you use this cooling moisturizer. It soothes the skin and smoothes out dry areas to leave you with a glow that is impossible not to notice.

Courtesy: La Mer.

The Eye Concentrate

Using the power and nourishing capabilities of algae, this coveted eye treatment to reduce the appearance of dark circles and wrinkles in days. It smoothes, brightens, and hydrates all at once.

Courtesy: La Mer.

The Intensive Revitalizing Mask

Detoxify your skin and give life back to it with this plumping mask designed to revitalize aging skin. All you have to leave it on for eight minutes and watch as it works its magic.