Month: June 2025

What’s the bond between the brothers like now?

Jenny, a 67-year-old client from my group, came to me feeling both excited and completely overwhelmed. She was ready to find love again, but the idea of navigating online dating – and all the technology that came with it – felt intimidating.

“I haven’t dated in decades,” she told me, “and now I’m supposed to swipe, upload, and message like a teenager?”

Sound familiar?

If you’re a woman over 60 and thinking about dating online, it’s totally normal to wonder: Do I need to be tech-savvy to actually meet someone?

The truth is: you don’t need to be a tech expert. But a little confidence with the basics can go a long way in helping you feel more in control – and more successful – on your path to love.

So, if the tech part has been holding you back, you’re not alone – and you’re more capable than you might think.

And these 6 simple tips will help you feel more confident (not overwhelmed) about dating online.

Tip #1: You Don’t Have to Know It All – Just Enough

You don’t need to master every app or tool. But knowing how to:

• Send and check email
• Use a web browser to log into dating sites like Match or Our Time
• Download an app like Bumble
• Take and upload photos
• Save and manage passwords

can make the whole process easier and more empowering.

Many of my clients have picked up these skills as they went. One woman told me, “I didn’t grow up with this stuff, but I’m doing it – and it feels good.”

Tip #2: Choose the Right Platform for You

My clients have had success with:

• Match – Men are more serious about finding relationships, and you can use it on your browser or in an app on your phone.
• Bumble – It has plenty of men in their 50s and 60s, and women get to make the first move.

Check out our list at The Top 5 Best Dating Sites for Seniors.

Tip #3: Know How to Create and Update Your Profile

This is your chance to show who you are – and you don’t need to overcomplicate it.

Make sure you can:

• Upload 2–5 recent photos (including a smiling headshot and one full-body image).
• Write a short, friendly bio that reflects who you are and what you’re looking for.
• Update your profile as your preferences or goals evolve.

If it’s easier, write your profile on your computer first then copy and paste it into the app later.

Your profile doesn’t need to be perfect. Just honest, warm, and true to you.

Tip #4: Messaging Isn’t Complicated (Really!)

You don’t have to be clever or polished. The best connections come from genuine, kind conversations.

You’ll want to know how to:

• Read and respond to messages.
• Ask simple questions to get to know someone.
• Block or report anyone who feels off.

You’re in charge of who you engage with – and who you don’t.

Tip #5: Spotting Red Flags Is Part of the Process

Online safety is part of online dating. It helps to know how to:

• Watch for red flags like someone rushing to move off the app.
• Protect your personal info (never share your address or finances).
• Use blocking and reporting features when needed.

If something feels off, trust your gut.

Tip #6: Video or Phone Chats Are Optional

I encourage my clients to meet for a casual coffee sooner rather than later. It’s the best way to find out if there’s a real connection – otherwise you could end up wasting time on endless messages and phone calls with the wrong person. Something that can happen if you spend too much time talking before you meet.

Still, some women feel better easing in with a quick phone or video chat. If that’s you, here’s what to know:

• Use Zoom, FaceTime, or the app’s video feature.
• Find a quiet spot with good lighting.
• Keep it short and don’t try and vet someone using technology – get to the meet and greet to figure that out.

You don’t have to use the phone or video – but it’s there if it helps you feel more confident.

Need a Little Extra Help?

You don’t have to figure this out alone. If you’re feeling stuck, try one of these:

• Ask your adult children or grandkids to walk you through it – they often love helping!
• Reach out to a tech-savvy friend.
• Check out free library or community center classes.
• Search YouTube for simple how-to videos (like “how to set up a dating profile on Match or Bumble”).

You don’t have to figure this out alone. That’s why I created an amazing group program that’s helped women over 50 find real, lasting love – often when they thought it might be too late.

Jenny was one of them. Not long ago, she felt just as overwhelmed and uncertain as you might feel right now. But with the right support, she took it one step at a time – and today, she’s in a wonderful relationship with a man who truly cherishes her.

Her story is just one example of what’s possible when you have the right support – and I’d love to offer that to you, too.

If you’re curious whether my program might be a fit, just email me at Lisa@findaqualityman.com, and we can set up a time to talk and explore what’s possible for you.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What dating apps have you used? Were they easy or difficult to navigate? Do you feel confident using technology to look for dates?

For years, you’ve been asking us to do something about the ads on our website — and we’ve finally done it!

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The three of us live in Ecuador; Polly, Molly, and Dolly (I’ve changed our names to protect the innocent). We are up to no good about 85% of the time, and the rest of the time we are fairly useless, but trying to do kind things. All three of us have gone through marriage, kids, trauma, and an international move to beautiful Ecuador. We are connected by a love of life, experiences, and the question of whether or not one of us will settle for just one fella.

Magnets (or Not)

Polly’s husband died about two years ago, and because they had a tumultuous relationship with very little action (if you know what I mean) she’s looking for what she calls “appetizers.” Sometimes she has a cheeseburger, but mostly they are appetizers, and honestly, I don’t know the difference. She has big, curly, reddish hair, hip huggers, and is like a yummy giant chocolate chip cookie.

Molly is very pretty with long-ish blonde hair and a pickleball obsession, so the Latino men chase her down and beg for things like dates, drinks… anything. She’s been divorced for many years (I never got a straight answer on how long), and she loves to date. Like, she’s on several dating apps and goes out all the time.

Having said that, Molly is not a push-over. She makes them wait for a looooonnnnnggggg time before any action happens. I think, for her, it’s kind of like a sport or a form of entertainment, and she has the absolute best stories about dumb things that happen. For example, one time a man who she had been dating for about four months ghosted her. When he reappeared a month later, he said he went to Australia, and why was she upset? I’m pretty sure she went ballistic on him, but I can’t confirm it.

Then there is Dolly. I call myself Dolly because I love Dolly Parton, but I don’t like country music so there’s that. I don’t date. I’ve been divorced for about 16 years and, after a few relationships, I decided I preferred to read books, sleep sprawled out on the couch, and avoid all male eye contact under the theory that romance never goes unpunished. Yah, I’m fun.

Stories from the Wings

As the perpetual wing-woman whenever we go out, I am vastly entertained by Polly and Molly. Polly doesn’t speak Spanish, but manages to be so fun and open-hearted with everyone she meets, that she ends up with the cutest appetizer in the room. She says that dating is healing her heart, and she keeps it light, playful, and easy. I admire her.

I’m lighthearted until the man in question says something stupid like that I should run twice around the park instead of once, insinuating that this would make me look better. I’m pretty sure I gave that guy the stink-eye and dumped him, but I cannot confirm or deny this fact.

Molly speaks Spanish and loves to dance salsa. She gets on the floor, and, even though she’s not great at it, she is a perpetual learner and loves a good challenge. I admire her. I suck at dancing and am so awkward as to defy belief. We go dancing and I have a wonderful time being ridiculous and watching the Ecuadorians who popped out dancing at birth.

I think Molly’s attitude to dating is like a safety valve; she can let out steam and always go home to her peace and quiet. I understand. Dating anywhere in the world has its share of minefields, and it’s important to keep your balance, stand in the sunshine and know who you are.

Chocolate Magnet

Chocolate has pluses and minuses. On the one hand, it’s delicious and gives you a wonderful rush of positive energy and long-term pleasure, knowing it’s always there for you. The minus is the hangover that creeps in and leaves you drooling on the floor. In the end, most of us keep dipping into the chocolate because the rush is worth the hangover.

Those demented people who try to get us to stop eating sugar are only interesting in the short term – in the end we all throw caution to the wind and tackle some chocolate.

Such is romance. I think if you can keep it fun and be clear about what you want, the emotional demolition of a bad match can be (relatively) avoided.

My vote here is to enjoy life, eat chocolate, and turn off the news. Stick with the good.

The Uprising

What beautiful love lies ahead for women of a certain age? I have no idea, but I can tell you that here in Ecuador there is always a party happening somewhere. It is the most celebratory culture I have ever witnessed (I’ve lived in seven countries) and joining in has been a jubilant experience.

Am I voting for hedonism? Not really. It’s more like joie de vivre because if you’re anything like me, you have probably been overly responsible and caretaking in your life so a little letting go might be in order. Maybe, just maybe, there is an appetizer in your future, or perhaps a big juicy cheeseburger. (I’m speaking to myself here as well.) Whatever comes your way, be a chocolate bliss magnet, and stay open to possibilities, sisters.

Also read, Not Old Yet: Living Abroad Solo.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How’s your dating life going? Do you even want to date? What funny stories can you share about meeting appetizers?

It can be easy to stick to what we know, why update what we have been doing for a lifetime? However, I am very glad I am not still wearing thick, cakey, Pan Stick (who remembers that?) or glued on eye lashes that came unstuck at the edges and hung like spiders :).

In truth, much of today’s makeup has really changed and is simple to apply, long-lasting and may even have some benefits for the skin, something older people are often much more concerned with than the makeup itself.

Start with the Basics

It goes without saying that a good skincare routine provides the best canvas for makeup. Moisturiser and sunscreen should be used every day to keep skin hydrated and protected. 

As we age our eyesight is not what it was, so using a magnified mirror can be a game changer. I remember the first time I used one, I looked like I had aged 20 years overnight. Now I have got used to it, it has become my best friend 🙂

Grooming should also be a part of our routine, making sure eyebrows are neat and tidy (how quick mine seem to grow!) and any odd unwanted hair gently plucked. If you like a minimalist look you may choose to have your eye lashes tinted so you don’t have to bother with mascara.

Foundation

Today’s foundation ranges from light cover, which includes tinted moisturiser, medium cover, which provides a more polished look, through to full cover, which conceals and provides a ‘flawless’ complexion. It can be applied with a brush, sponge, or my preference, fingertips. Try to find a colour that matches your skin, depending on the season of the year.

I have found that mixing a medium cover 50/50 with a base oil/serum, for example castor oil, works best for me. It give a light, even coverage, hydrates my skin and gives a nice glow. It does take a few minutes to dry but is well worth it.

Contour/Bronzer

Contouring has become a big trend recently, and it is easy to see why. Contour sticks make application easy and can be used to reduce the size of your nose, lift cheek bones, sculpt jawline and define the shape of your face. They are typically darker than your skin tone and work by creating shadows.

Bronzers provide a sun-kissed glow and add warmth to the skin, making it look more radiant and healthy. Many people use bronzers without foundation if they want a bare minimum look.

Eyes

Just because we may have a few wrinkles around our eyes doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t wear makeup! In fact, eye makeup can provide a quick pick-me-up and boost confidence. If you are not used to wearing eye makeup, start with some neutral eye shadow colours, and then experiment depending on the occasion, time of year, mood and preferences.

As we age, many of us experience our eye lashes becoming a little shorter and not so thick. One way to make your lashes appear longer and thicker is mascara, and there is a vast number of different types on the market. Choose whether you would like to lengthen, thicken, nourish, or any combination. If you prefer not to use mascara but feel your lashes need a boost, you could consider having them tinted.

Lips

Most of us experience our lips become a little thinner as we get older, this is due to loss of collagen, bone density and elastin. Other than fillers, there is little that can be done to enhance them except keeping them moist, using an SPF lip balm, and eating a nutritious balanced diet.

However, what we can do is work with what we have. Lip liners, drawn just a fraction wider than our lips, can provide definition. Lipsticks, which can be matt or shine, can add colour and vibrancy. Some lip glosses include a plumping ingredient, which can not only add shine, but make them look a little fuller.

Join the Conversation

Have you updated your makeup recently? Do you find makeup boosts your confidence? Have you stopped wearing makeup?