Thinking about dating again after divorce? Whether you’re ready to cannonball into the deep end or just dip a toe in, you’re not alone – and yes, it can feel terrifying. Especially if your last date involved pagers, Blockbuster, or dial-up internet.
If your marriage lasted decades or your divorce left you emotionally wiped out (or both), it’s totally normal to wonder:
“Am I really ready to date again?”
Let’s walk through the most common things I hear from newly divorced clients – and bust a few myths while we’re at it:
Myth #1: All the Good Men/Women Are Taken
Nope. Just… nope. It only feels that way. Fun fact: 38% of people over 50 have gone through a divorce. The dating pool didn’t dry up. It just looks different now (and no one’s doing cannonballs anymore, which honestly, thank goodness!).
Myth #2: There’s Still a Stigma Around Divorce
That disappeared with shoulder pads and fax machines. Divorce today just means you’re human. It happens. You’ve grown. You’ve learned. Now you get a second shot – wiser, stronger, and more interesting.
Myth #3: My Married Friends Say Dating Is Awful – and My Single Friends Agree
First off, your married friends have zero idea what the dating scene looks like. And second, your single friends who say it’s terrible? After 30+ years in this business, let’s just say… there’s often a reason they’re still single. And that reason has nothing to do with you.
Myth #4: Online Dating Is Scary. I Want to Meet Someone Organically
Look, “organic” is great – for blueberries. But for dating? Online is where it’s at. Modern platforms like Bumble and Match have stepped up their game with ID checks and smarter screening. Want to meet someone playing pickleball? Sure! But also: don’t hold your breath.
So, How Do You Know You’re Ready?
Step 1: Start with Your Mindset
In my bestselling book, 2nd Acts: Strategies for Dating Over 50, the first worksheet asks:
“Where’s your head at?”
It’s full of thoughtful questions like:
- Can you go on a date without ranting about your ex?
- Are you nervous – but also kind of excited?
- Do you feel like you’re “too old” or have “nothing to talk about”?
- If any of this hits home, you’re not alone. And that worksheet might just give you the clarity you need.
Step 2: Think of Dating Like a New Sport
You wouldn’t pick up golf without a few lessons, right? Same thing here. Start small:
- Pick one dating site.
- Write a short, friendly profile.
- Upload 5-6 real, happy, flattering photos.
- Send a few light messages (“Love your dog – what’s her name?” works way better than “So… what are you looking for?”)
Step 3: Boost Your Dating Confidence
The secret sauce? Go on 2-3 first dates in your first few weeks. You’ll be amazed:
You got dressed up.
You smiled.
You laughed.
You didn’t spontaneously combust.
Boom – you’re doing it.
Step 4: Get a Dating Coach
Your best friend or your cousin’s hairdresser is not your dating coach. I am. And I’ve helped thousands of women like you navigate the new dating jungle with clarity, confidence, and results. Why fumble around for months when you could have a pro in your corner?
Step 5: Don’t Give Up at the Two-Week Mark
Seriously. Most people quit after 14 days. But success comes to those who commit. I recommend a solid 90-day dating game plan – and I’ve got your back the whole way. Over 65% of my clients find a romantic partner. Not too shabby, right?
Dating after divorce might feel like a mountain climb. But with the right prep it can actually be fun. Really fun. So, stop staring at the dating pool – dangle those fabulous toes in and wade in with curiosity.
Check out my YouTube channel for more tips on how to get started.
Or grab your copy of 2nd Acts: Strategies for Dating Over 50 – worksheets, wisdom, and a whole lot of wit included.
You’ve got this.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
Have you been through a divorce? How did you feel about dating again? What were you most scared about?
