I rarely set goals anymore. Not that there’s anything wrong with them. If you want to learn Italian or climb Mt. Everest, you can certainly set goals to do those things.

It’s just that the concept of a “goal” feels limiting. What if, by focusing on a specific thing, I eliminate other possible outcomes that would serve me better? Things I never considered? An even bigger dream?

God can dream a bigger dream for me, for you, than you could ever dream for yourself.

—Oprah Winfrey

So now I set fewer goals, and I live with more intention. Here’s how I split that hair.

Intention Statements Reflect Our Soul’s Longing

I intend to have more peace in my life.

I want to open up to more joy. 

I welcome abundance.

These statements describe a feeling state. They’re different from I will meditate every day for an hour. I will find new hobbies. I will save $1,000 by the end of the year.

Intention statements describe the essence of what we truly hope for but stop short of stating how we will get there.

Yes, the “how” is left to our choices. But it’s also left to life’s magic. And often to a Wisdom greater than ourselves.

We can breathe life into our intentions in large ways or small. Actually, it’s easier to achieve a desired feeling state if we take small steps.

If we crave more peace, we carve out a few minutes of solitude each day. 

If we long for more love, we take the time to reach out to the people we care about.

We can begin bringing our intentions into form in simple ways:

• Finding an object or physical representation of it,
• By listening for it through music,
• In journaling about how we see it manifesting,
• By creating a vision board or collage of images that reflect it.

We don’t always have to take big leaps to make big dreams come true.

Intentions Allow Us to Dream Bigger

Goal-setting is defined as “a process that starts with careful consideration of exactly what you want to achieve and ends with a lot of hard work to achieve it.”

But setting an intention means we open up to all possibilities, not just one. We move into “expansion mode” because we’re not limited to one particular result. 

Setting intentions allows us to both clarify what we want and allow for that to come to us in a myriad of ways, many of them unexpected. It doesn’t always take a lot of hard work to realize our intentions.

The outcomes can often amaze us.

We Create Intentions from the Deep Within

Goals are designed to be measured. They are, by definition, easy to quantify. They might come with a checklist or a rating scale… some method to determine whether they’re met.

Goals have their place. And when something needs to be counted or completed according to specific guidelines, I can go with that.

But we create our intentions by looking within. There isn’t a graph or a chart that calibrates success. Their impact on us is a personal reflection.

And as I move through this season of life, I hope to eliminate as many mandates from the outside world as I can. I hope to live more from the inside, out. 

And I’ve learned that when we lean into setting intentions rather than just setting goals, we tune into our heart’s true desires. We open up to being led, inspired, and surprised.

I’ll choose that kind of hair-splitting any day.

How do you feel about setting goals? What does it mean to set an intention? Have you experienced both in this life stage? Join the conversation!

The definition of skip-gen travel is simple: grandparents traveling with grandkids without the parents along (i.e., skipping the “middle” generation).

Why is it becoming so popular? That’s simple, too: it’s the perfect win-win-win situation!

#1: Grandparents get to spend precious time with their grandchildren – bonding in a special way is not always possible with the parents along.

#2: Grandchildren benefit from the extra special attention (and a little bit of spoiling?) that grandparents are so well known for.

#3: Parents get a break from child care – maybe to take a vacation of their own to re-charge?

What Are Some of the Other Factors Driving This Trend?

A Boom of Baby Boomer Grandparents

First of all, there are just so many more grandparents around. It is no secret that baby boomers are entering retirement in record numbers: an average of 10,000 every day! And that retirement phase they are entering? It’s likely to stretch out much longer than for retirees in the past. The average person retiring at age 65 or 66 today can expect to spend about 20 years in retirement. 

What’s more, Social Security reports that 57% of retirees choose to retire even earlier than full retirement age. That’s a lot of retirement years! After good health and financial security, two things frequently cited as being very important to retirees are: time with family and opportunities to travel. What then could be better than combining the two with skip-gen travel? 

Fewer Grandchildren

Conversely, there are fewer grandchildren divided among all those grandparents. Large families used to be the norm, but no longer. Why does that matter? Well, first of all, most grandparents aren’t likely to plan a trip with four, five, or six grandchildren in tow. (There are exceptions, including yours truly – but I’m pretty intrepid, or maybe foolish!)

When there are fewer of them, grandparents can lavish more time, attention, and disposable income on each grandchild. It’s just a matter of math – and energy!

More Time and Cash

Grandparents tend to have more disposable income than their children. They certainly have more disposable time. More families than ever before have two working parents and there has been plenty of press about how stressed young parents feel.

Having a grandparent take a child on vacation during the summer or a school holiday can be a tremendous help with childcare logistics and day care costs. And whether they use the time to work, relax, or plan a getaway for themselves, the break from 24/7 childcare can be a much-needed boost. (We all know it’s true!)

Fewer Opportunities to Visit

In our mobile society, it is not uncommon for grandparents to live in a different city or even a different state (sometimes a different country?) from their grandchildren.

Grandparents may only see their grandchildren several times in a year, generally at busy times such as holidays when it may not be easy to spend quality or one-on-one time with each grandchild. (I speak from experience!) Grandparents can often be heard expressing a longing to bond with their far-flung grandchildren. 

Better Health and Active Lifestyle

Grandparents also tend to be healthier and more active today than grandparents in previous generations. Definite pluses when traveling!

Experience Planning Trips

One recent article about skip-gen travel mentioned an additional factor I had never considered, but it does make sense: grandparents today have more experience planning trips.

Many of them took their children on summer vacations – camping, theme parks, educational trips. Now that their own children are grown, they are ready to put all that knowledge and experience to good use with the next generation!

We Simply Love and Need Each Other

I have saved the most important reason for skip-gen travel for last. Grandparents and grandchildren need each other. There are actual physical and mental health benefits for both. More than one study has shown the benefits children gain from spending time with their grandparents. Other studies have shown that grandparents actually live longer if they spend time with their grandchildren! 

Skip-gen travel looks like it is here to stay. And thank goodness, because there are so many exciting possibilities! Speaking from experience, the skip-gen trips I have taken with my nine grandchildren over the past half-dozen years have been some of the most enriching experiences of my life!

How often do you get to see your grandchildren? Have you taken a shot at skip-gen travel? Where did you go and what was it like for you and your grandchildren? How did your children take the idea? Would you do a repeat? Let’s exchange stories!

Do you feel like you need a life-lift? Do you think that if a few things in your life would change you’d face each day with more hope and joy?

It does seem that after 60 some changes happen fast – like aches and sagging skin and the development of cataracts – and others are excruciatingly slow – like weight loss, improved muscle tone and remembering new information.

The negative changes that occur naturally can seem to be overwhelming. It is possible, though, to keep improving as we age… or at least to slow down the inevitable slowing down. We just have to have reasonable expectations and develop some intentional ways to be proactive.

It is discouraging to try to change a lot at once, so choosing one area of your life to improve and one small step to take is a good start. Life change is easier one small step at a time.

See if one of these life-lifting small steps is something you might try to make your life better.

Move More

Once those creaky bones get to aching, it is tempting to move less. But moving will, in most cases, be the best thing for you. For example, a walk around the block after dinner can be an easy step to take.

Our Medicare supplemental carrier offers Silver Sneakers as a perk. We now have free memberships at gyms in town where we can walk, push weights or use cardio machines any time of day.

There are group classes as well: yoga, chair aerobics, and even a Silver Sneaker class. A little bit of moving can bring a lot of progress.

Control Your Weight

Want to lose 10 pounds? Don’t focus on the number, focus on eating smaller portions of healthier foods; maybe skip the second helping.

Choose baked instead of fried. Don’t have chips as an 8:00 p.m. snack. Keep sugary soda out of your home. As metabolism slows down and activity decreases, we need fewer carb calories.

Want to not gain 10 pounds? The same suggestions will most likely work. Just one small decision daily can make a difference.

Contribute to Others

Staying at home, inside and alone, can become a dark and lonely place. Doing something to help someone else can have a huge improvement in your outlook and attitude.

Monthly food pantry, daily soup kitchen, weekly reading help, occasional baby rocking, park clean-up, sewing heart-shaped pillows for the hospital… regularly doing something for someone else can perk you up as you contribute to others.

Maybe simply picking up the phone to call someone is a big pick-up for them – and you. This doesn’t have to be something you do daily. Making an initial decision to find a place to reach out to others is a small step you can take forward today.

Define What You Want

I will soon lead a vision board workshop for women in their 50s to help them plan their ThirdThird (ages 60-90). They are beginning to fret about what it means to go from careers to whatever comes next. I am going to lead them through a day of deciding for themselves.

Drifting usually gets us somewhere, but not necessarily where we would have chosen to be. Pulling out the oars and propelling the boat is a more rewarding approach.

Define how you want to feel, what you want to do, where you want to go. It will give you focus and direction so that you can know that you are satisfied with your life.

Fill Your Cup Up

Whether you are wired to see the glass as half-empty or half-full, it needs more substance in it if it is to be full.

What will fill your glass, your life? Quiet time in the morning with a cup of coffee of tea to start your day? A good book to read before retiring at night? A garden to tend? Weekly face time with distant grandkids? Think about the things that will fill you up.

Choosing to find the good in every situation is a huge life-lift. Being grateful fills your glass and costs nothing. I find that making a list of things I am grateful for helps, because there are days when I’m tempted to forget how blessed my life is.

Taking the small step of choosing to find something to be grateful for can be a life-lift.

Drink More Water

Drinking more water is essential. So is eating more fiber.

Water and fiber can make us feel better by keeping everything moving as it should. Feeling sludgy makes it hard to be positive, to be active, to want to contribute to others. Maybe some good probiotics will help, too. Daily attention to water and fiber can have positive outcomes.

Be Realistic

Don’t expect yourself to feel or function like you did when you were 20 – or 30 or 40, or even 50 – if you are over 60.

Adjust to your new reality, and enjoy the journey that you are on by having realistic expectations of yourself. Take stock and be conscious of the adjustments you need to make in mind and body.

To be realistic, do not expect others to read your mind. If you need a visit from someone, ask them to stop by. If you know you should not drive after dark but want to attend an event, ask for a ride or learn to use Uber.

If you want a family dinner but are not able to host, ask someone else to. You can show up with energy and attitude to help with smiles and stories.

Make every day better by choosing one small step in the direction you want to take. Then, celebrate small victories and enjoy a more positive outlook.

How are you staying healthy now that you are in your 60s or better? What helps you to be positive yet realistic about growing past 60? Please join the conversation below.

Fans of Fenty Beauty’s Gloss Bomb, the non-sticky lip gloss favorite, are going crazy over the brand’s newest formula. Fenty Beauty Gloss Bomb Heat is the first lip plumper from Rihanna’s beauty brand and a truly unique one at that. Plumping lip gloss is nothing new and there are some great ones on the market. But Gloss Bomb Heat has much more than just plumping action. Allow me to explain.

I love the hydrating Gloss Bomb formula so I was excited to try this new iteration. It has the same conditioning shea butter and vitamin E blend to help lock in moisture but the addition of ginger root oil and capsicum fruit extract (pepper) to instantly plump lips. I planned to use Gloss Bomb Heat as a topper on my usual lipstick shades, adding high-shine for a Hot Vax Summer vibe.

But it turns out, I’m obsessed with the non-shimmer color of Gloss Bomb Heat Universal Lip Luminizer + Plumper on its own. The Hot Cherry shade looks very red in the tube but when applied, is the perfect sheer hue. It’s not too pigmented, but just enough to add color to the shine.

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Fenty Beauty.

When I posted about Gloss Bomb Heat on my Instagram the most popular question I got was, does it hurt? I would admit that it does burn a bit but less than others I’ve tried. My favorite thing about this formula is that it’s not just the plumping ingredients that make your lips appear fuller. The shiny red color makes a big difference and the lush shea butter adds to the effect.

Source: Instagram

The color also lasts a few hours on the lips before you need to apply again, which is key for me when I’m out running around. Plus, when you apply another layer, you don’t get that dry, sticky texture that sometimes happens when one layer has dried. The formula is thick and hydrating enough to layer on as much as you’d like. If you’ve been wanting lip filler or just want to steal Rihanna’s perfect summer pout, this gloss is going to be your new favorite.