Author: HairWeavings Editorial Team

As the leaves fall, the trees become bare, and a few apples hang stubbornly on my apple tree; ebony crows sit watchful on the fence row. I, too, have hung stubbornly to the tree, resisting change. In the last few evening hours before Daylight Savings time ended, I frantically spent every moment outside, worshipping the last moments of that honey colored sun because I know what is coming. Darkness.

Despite being a gardener and naturalist, who is aware of the cycle of life, it has taken me a long time to honor this honest and inevitable turning of the wheel of the year. It was not until I addressed my own darkness and inability to rest, that I became able to accept and embrace the fading of the light. It is the fact that nothing lasts forever that makes every moment so precious.

Type A x 10, and Forest Gump

Like a beehive at the height of summer, I spent most of my life moving at warp speed. In my 50s, I realized this was a coping mechanism to avoid mourning and grieving the losses in my life, the heartache in my soul and the sadness of what had been taken from me physically, emotionally and spiritually.

When I ran a 10K like a pirate with a peg leg, three days before my first hip replacement, I had my come-to-Jesus moment. If you are stubborn and brave enough to do this, you are brave enough to stop because this is lunacy. It was like that iconic scene in the movie Forest Gump when he slowly stops his years of literarily running back and forth across the United States and announces he is going home.

Coming Home

This is not an easy process, but in a season where we are called to be grateful and give thanks, I am relieved that I am at peace. Just like that leaf slowly spinning as it falls from its mother tree, letting go of the life and sustenance, and spring and summer days of growth and sunshine, can be enlightening.

I, too, can finally let go of summer, embrace the unknown and all that comes with it. I can look into the darkening sky and not be afraid because I have learned to shift my focus inward, toward self-reflection and restoration.

My invitation to you is to rest with the cycles of nature, sending your energy down to your “roots” so that you may re-enter the next year from a nourished and replenished place and know that death is never final for the cycles of nature always promise rebirth.

Letting go of my emotional, and eventual mortal coil, like the leaf, I must have faith that I may not be the same person emerging in the spring or the next life, but I will reemerge.

Some Customs of Autumn that I Embrace

I remember all my friends and family that have journeyed on. My Italian family goes to the cemetery and has a picnic celebrating both our ancestors and their memories.

The Celts gathered around the fire and told and shared stories of their loved ones and warriors.

Meditation Is Part of It

I meditate on what behaviors, bad habits, and anxieties I would like to let go of as I release the emotions that come with each. It is amazing what I chose to hold onto, especially when release can be so very sweet.

Fire, the element of Autumn, is a potent way to release, let go or transform. I have numerous ways of working with fire and some are as simple as that first lighting of the woodstove, or the pine scented candles that line my windows. Also, I like to sit outside with a mug of warm cider and watch the glow of the burning wood in my outdoor fire pit.

My Burning Ritual

Finally, through the year I throw old trees limbs, the detritus of broken furniture, wood pallets and all other burnable materials on a pyre worthy of the Vikings. My family and I gather round with chairs, and I send all I want to dissipate into those orange, blue, yellow and green flames. It is a symbolic and very real way of burning off the dross of the year and all things that I do not want to carry forward. And then, after doing that, I can enjoy the warmth and magic of the flames!

A Shift in Lifestyle and Diet

I curtail wine drinking, prepare nourishing herbal infusions, cook my root vegetables, and take joy in the chestnuts, pomegranates, and cool weather greens like kale, spinach and swiss chard. Venison, acorn fed pork and that turkey grace my table.

Interestingly, it was the pomegranate that tempted Persephone, the Goddess of Spring. Hades, the God of the Underworld, lured and tempted her to his dark kingdom with that mahogany red fruit. But he found out he could not keep her forever. Her mother, Demeter, reminded Hades of the need for reawakening and revival, so he releases her every year for seedtime and pink blossoms.

There will always be spring, and I must remember, as the light closes in earlier and earlier every evening, the darkness, too, has earned its place.

Also read THE AUTUMN QUEEN, A FABLE.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Who will you be next year? What would you like to let go of? Are there any old beliefs that may hold you back? What end-of-year rituals have you established to cleanse yourself of the old?

Hopscotch. We played the game every day after school. We played it on the sidewalks and in the playgrounds outside the eighteen-floor brick building that was our home in Brooklyn, New York. We played as a way to hang out with each other. We were friends. We were friends because we were the same age and lived a floor from each other.

How do we hang out with our friends as adults?

Why Friendships Matter

Friendships matter for our emotional and physical health. Strong friendships are shown by researchers to be an important key to successful aging. They matter because we are social animals and we need social connection. In the United States, at least, researchers report that there has been a large decline in the number of people who have a close confidant outside of their immediate family.

Friendships need both time and proximity. In other words, we need to hang out with our friends. There’s an old Viking saying from the Havemel that is translated as, “A bad friend is far away though his cottage is close, to a true friend lies a trodden path though his farm lies far away.”

The “well-trodden path” represents all the time we spend with our friend. When we spend time, we give our friend our attention. We give them our presence. We give them our eyes and ears, our heart and our mind. We talk, we laugh, we create memories together.

The Importance of Sharing

We share. We may share hopscotch or bridge or chess. We may share hiking, skiing or hunting. We may share movies, opera and museums. We may share social justice causes and politics. We may share a spiritual practice. We may share making music, dancing and acting. We may share dog shows, music making or motorcycle racing. This list can go on forever because there are an amazing number of human activities. There’s something for everyone.

Not all friends are the same, of course. Some are closer than others. Some are acquaintances. Different people bring out different parts of ourselves.

But how does a stranger turn into an acquaintance? How does an acquaintance turn into a friendship? By being together. By taking the time. It’s an incremental process of getting to know another person. By sharing something of who you are and listening to who the other person is. This is a reciprocal process. You share a bit, and the other person shares a bit. You are encouraged to share more and the other takes a risk to share more. It takes time.

Steps for Building Strong Friendships

In former times, this was a lot easier. But because we now live in such an individualized, unconnected society (despite various tools, apps and such), we have to work on developing friendships. If you want to have more friends, if you are finding your opportunities for being social to be limited, you need to take some proactive steps.

First, find an activity you like that meets once a week. Finding people who like the same things you do is an excellent place to start since you already have something in common. An activity that meets once a week is often enough that it doesn’t take long for you to become part of the group. Better yet, find more than one activity to join.

Then go to it. There is always a first time. It’s scary, but do it anyway. The second time you’ll know more about what to expect.

Next, take part. Be helpful. Volunteer.

As you get to know the people, is there someone you’d like to know better? Spend time together outside the activity. This could be getting together for coffee (tea, wine) or to engage more in the activity you both like.

When you are together, listen and share. Make it more about the other person than you. Everyone likes to talk about themselves. No one wants to hear all about you all the time.

Other Pathways to Pursue

If you have friends you have neglected, get back in touch with them. A true friend will be delighted you made the effort. Make the path between your home and theirs a “well-trodden” path. Set up a plan to have a weekly meal together or some other activity that fits your friendship.

Another way to have friends in your life is to share housing. Living with someone you like and respect gives you the time and proximity for them to become a friend. You share making a home together. This doesn’t mean you are joined at the hip. You have independent lives and outside interests. At home you meet up, you share about your day, you might have a meal together, you hang out together. You are home-mates.

If the idea of a home-mate appeals to you, you can find someone suitable using the steps listed above. You can also talk about it among your current friends. Yes, it’s a big change. The potential rewards in emotional and physical health are significant, however. There are many stories about people who have chosen to live with others here.

The art of friendship is captured in this quote from Zig Ziglar, “If you go looking for a friend, you’re going to find they’re very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”

Go create some “well-trodden paths.”

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What kind of “well-trodden paths” do you already have? How have you pursued friendships as an adult? Do you find it difficult to make new friends? Why? Why not? Have you considered living with a home-mate? Please share in the comments and join the conversation.

As the leaves begin to change and a gentle chill graces the air, the world transforms into a canvas of warm and inviting hues. What better way to embrace the beauty of autumn than by adorning yourself in a stunning fall coat that not only provides warmth but also exudes timeless elegance.

We understand that fashion isn’t bound by age; rather, it evolves and refines with it. With a focus on comfort, sophistication, and versatility, we’ll explore the trending coat styles that will not only keep you cozy during the brisk fall days but also make you feel effortlessly chic and confident.

1. STYLE & CO Floral-Embroidered Jacket, Created for Macy’s – Style & Co adds elegance to this zip-up jacket with delicate floral embroidery at the yoke. It offers practicality with snap flap and slant pockets.
2. Zenergy UPF Water Resistant Jacket at Chico’s – This classic-fit jacket combines purpose with style, featuring front zipper pockets, an inner patch pocket, and a flattering drawstring waist. The addition of contrasting gold-tone hardware, a bungee hood, and a hem adds sophistication and versatility.
3. Chevron Packable Puffer Jacket from Anne Klein – This Chevron Packable Coat combines a figure-flattering design offering durability, warmth, and simplicity. With a fully lined interior, adjustable hood, and secure zippered pockets, it’s the perfect choice for comfortable outdoor wear.
4. MICHAEL MICHAEL KORS Belted Notched-Collar Wrap Coat at Macy’s – The MICHAEL Michael Kors Wrap Coat exudes timeless elegance with its notched collar, double-breasted button closures, and self-tie belt. Lined for comfort and featuring practical welt pockets, it’s a sophisticated choice for any occasion.
5. Faux-Leather-Trim Belted Wrap Coat at Macy’s –The Tahari Wrap Coat boasts sleek faux-leather trim and a glossy belt for a blend of classic and contemporary style. With on-seam pockets and a wing collar, it offers both practicality and sophistication, making it a versatile choice for various occasions.
6. Riveted Faux Leather Peplum Jacket – The Riveted Faux Leather Peplum Jacket is a sleek and soft statement piece with riveted scallop trim and a raw edge hem. With a collared design and hidden snap closure, it offers a polished look for both business and casual outfits.
7. Bean’s Chore Jacket at L.L. Bean – The Bean’s Chore Jacket by L.L. Bean is a rugged and durable workwear-inspired jacket made from heavy-duty cotton canvas. It features multiple pockets for practicality and a timeless design that pairs well with various outfits, embodying L.L. Bean’s commitment to quality and classic style.

Whether you’re strolling through the park, attending a gathering with loved ones, or simply relishing the simple pleasures of the season, these fall coats will be your trusted companions, elevating your autumn wardrobe to new heights of elegance.

How to Choose Your Fall Coat

Choosing the perfect fall coat is a task that involves considering various factors, from your personal style to the climate of your region.

Assess Your Needs

Start by evaluating your lifestyle and the activities you’ll engage in during the fall season. Are you looking for a casual everyday coat, an elegant evening coat, or something adaptable that can transition between different occasions? Consider your specific needs to narrow down your choices.

Know Your Style

Understand your personal style preferences. Are you more inclined towards classic, timeless pieces, or do you prefer trendy and fashion-forward designs? Knowing your style will guide you in selecting a coat that reflects your personality.

Consider the Climate

Take your local climate into account. Fall weather can vary significantly, from mild and temperate to chilly and rainy. Choose a coat that provides the right level of warmth and protection for your area. Waterproof or water-resistant options can be essential if you expect rain.

Choose the Right Length

Coat lengths vary, from cropped jackets to knee-length and longer coats. Longer coats provide better coverage and warmth, while shorter styles can be more flattering for various body types. Select a length that compliments your figure and fits your lifestyle.

Pick a Versatile Color

Opt for a coat color that complements your existing wardrobe. Neutral tones like black, gray, camel, and navy are classic choices that can be easily paired with different outfits. However, if you enjoy experimenting with color, consider rich fall shades like burgundy, deep green, or mustard.

Fabric and Material

Pay attention to the fabric and material of the coat. Wool and wool blends are excellent choices for warmth and durability. For a lighter option, consider cotton or synthetic blends. Choose a fabric that suits your climate and comfort level.

Fit and Silhouette

A well-fitting coat is essential for a polished look. Ensure that the coat allows you to move comfortably and doesn’t feel too tight or too loose. Pay attention to the shoulders, sleeves, and length, and consider trying on different sizes and styles to find the perfect fit.

Features and Details

Consider the coat’s features and details. Features like a hood, pockets, and adjustable cuffs can enhance functionality. Details such as buttons, zippers, and collars can influence the overall style and look of the coat.

Quality and Durability

Invest in a high-quality coat that will last for several fall seasons. Quality coats may come with a higher price tag, but they are often worth the investment due to their longevity and timeless appeal.

Try Before You Buy

Whenever possible, try on the coat before purchasing it. Pay attention to how it feels, how it looks on you, and whether it meets your expectations.

Review Return Policies

In case you change your mind or the coat doesn’t meet your expectations after purchase, make sure you’re aware of the store’s return policy.

Remember that choosing a fall coat is a personal decision, and it should make you feel comfortable, confident, and stylish. By considering your needs, style preferences, and climate, you’ll be well-equipped to find the perfect fall coat that enhances your autumn wardrobe.

Fall Coats for Women Over 50

STYLE & CO Floral-Embroidered Jacket, Created for Macy’s

Style & Co offers this casual chic jacket featuring delicate floral embroidery at the yoke. It has both fashion and functionality with snap flap pockets at the chest and convenient slant pockets at the front.

This jacket offers a flattering silhouette with a drawstring waist and a collarless design. The zipper closure at the front, along with a snap placket, adds a touch of practicality. Exclusively created for Macy’s, this jacket seamlessly blends style and comfort.

Zenergy UPF Water Resistant Jacket at Chico’s

This classic-fit, long-sleeve jacket from Chico’s features practical elements like front zipper pockets and an inner patch pocket, along with a drawstring waist for a flattering silhouette.

The contrasting gold-tone hardware adds a touch of sophistication to the coat. Made from 100% nylon, this jacket combines style and functionality effortlessly.

Chevron Packable Puffer Jacket from Anne Klein

Crafted for durability and warmth, this coat offers a blend of simplicity and functionality that’s hard to beat. Its standout feature is its packability, allowing you to fold it neatly into its own pocket for ultimate convenience when you’re on the go.

This coat is fully lined, ensuring both comfort and insulation against the chill of the season. The adjustable hood, complete with an elastic cord, adds an extra layer of protection against the elements, keeping you cozy and dry even on those unexpected rainy days.

With two pockets featuring secure zipper closures, you have ample storage for your essentials while also keeping your hands warm. Whether you’re heading out for a casual stroll or need a reliable layer for your outdoor adventures, the Chevron Packable Coat is the perfect choice, offering style, warmth, and practicality in one elegant package.

MICHAEL MICHAEL KORS Belted Notched-Collar Wrap Coat at Macy’s

Indulge in timeless elegance with the MICHAEL Michael Kors Wrap Coat, a statement piece that effortlessly elevates your style. This meticulously designed coat is a true embodiment of sophistication, featuring a classic notched collar that frames your neckline with grace.

The front boasts double-breasted button closures, a nod to traditional tailoring that exudes class and refinement. Purpose meets style with two welt pockets, offering functionality without compromising on the coat’s sleek silhouette. The removable self-tie belt cinches the waist, accentuating your curves and giving you the flexibility to switch up your look.

Lined for comfort, this wrap coat from MICHAEL Michael Kors is a versatile and chic choice for any occasion. Whether you’re heading to a formal event or simply strolling through the city, this coat promises enviable style and sophistication.

Faux-Leather-Trim Belted Wrap Coat at Macy’s

This wing collar wrap coat combines classic design elements with contemporary style to create a coat that’s both timeless and fashion-forward. One of its standout features is the sleek faux-leather trim, which adds a touch of sophistication and edginess to the overall look. This trim not only enhances the coat’s visual appeal but also contributes to its durability.

Completing the look is a glossy faux-leather belt, adding an extra layer of refinement to this already chic coat. The belt cinches at the waist, accentuating your figure and providing a customizable fit that flatters your silhouette.

Riveted Faux Leather Peplum Jacket

Boost your everyday style with the Riveted Faux Leather Peplum Jacket, a piece that effortlessly combines sophistication and softness. Crafted from faux leather material, this jacket is a statement of contemporary fashion, offering a sleek and edgy look without compromising on comfort.

The riveted scallop trim placket and raw edge hem add unique detailing to this jacket, making it a standout piece in your wardrobe. The collared design and hidden snap closure give it a polished and professional touch, ideal for both business meetings and casual outings.

The peplum waist is a flattering design feature, adding a touch of femininity to the classic fit. The jacket is fully lined and comes in a regular length of 27.5 inches, ensuring it pairs seamlessly with a variety of outfits.

Bean’s Chore Jacket at L.L. Bean

The Bean’s Chore Jacket from L.L. Bean is a quintessential piece of workwear-inspired outerwear that embodies both rugged durability and classic style. This iconic jacket is a testament to L.L. Bean’s longstanding commitment to quality and craftsmanship.

Made from heavy-duty cotton canvas, this jacket is built to withstand the rigors of everyday wear and tear. Its sturdy construction is complemented by reinforced seams and a robust brass zipper closure, ensuring longevity and reliability. The material is not only tough but also comfortable, making it an ideal choice for various activities and weather conditions.

The design of the Bean’s Chore Jacket is both functional and timeless. It features multiple pockets, including chest and hand warmer pockets. The classic chore jacket silhouette is universal and easily pairs with a range of casual outfits.

The jacket has a relaxed fit that allows for ease of movement while maintaining a flattering and comfortable shape. Its traditional collar and cuffs add a touch of vintage charm to the overall look.

Whether you’re tackling outdoor chores or simply embracing the rugged aesthetic of workwear fashion, the Bean’s Chore Jacket from L.L. Bean is a dependable and stylish choice that embodies the brand’s legacy of quality and timeless design.

Read 10 WINTER JACKETS FOR WOMEN OVER 50.

Also read 7 BEST TRENCH COATS FOR WOMEN OVER 50.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Which is your favorite store to shop for fall coats? Do you purchase a new one every year or do you wear your fall coat for several consecutive years? Do you own more than one fall coat? What is your favorite style?

There are various definitions of stress, but here’s mine: It’s the tense, unpleasant internal sensation that accompanies any negative emotion you care to mention, be it hostility, anger, frustration, or worry, and it lingers for as long as the situation provoking that unpleasant emotion remains unresolved in our minds.

In his book Mental Hygiene (first published in 1843), the American physician William Sweetser (1797-1875) introduced the term mental hygiene, and he proposed that stress and mental ill health can be the cause of much physical illness.

His claim anticipated the modern approach to mental ill health. We now know that, for many millions of people across the world, the physical pains and other symptoms they experience could be prevented or alleviated if they were given help to better cope with stress, meaning, life.

Signs of Stress

Stress manifests itself in a huge range of physical symptoms. These include:

• Insomnia
• Irritable bowels
• Tension headaches
• Back pain
• Muscle tension, especially in the neck and jaw (clenching)
• Night sweats
• Chest pain and/or difficulty breathing, especially in the midst of a stress-inducing situation
• Fatigue
• A compromised immune system, plus the conditions arising from this (e.g., ear and skin infections, colds)
• Coldness in our hands and feet.

Many of these symptoms arise because, when we suffer from chronic stress, our body is in effect malfunctioning as a result of the sustained presence within it of the “fight or flight” hormones.

These are released when our brain determines that we’re in a dangerous situation. They are designed to help us escape from life-threatening physical danger, and they’re only supposed to be released for short periods. Unfortunately, our modern lifestyles and ways of thinking regularly trigger the release of them in many people. Our body is not designed to cope with this.

Major Stressors

The Holmes-Rahe Stress Scale, also known as the Social Readjustment Rating Scale, is a list of stressful life events. First developed in 1967, this list attributes points to different life stressors. The more points you accumulate over a year, the more likely you are to experience health issues. It’s a useful reference to consult if you’re looking to understand what aspects of your life may be your most significant sources of stress.

The most serious stressors it lists are the death of a spouse or a close family member, divorce, and marriage. These are followed by dismissal from a job, marital separation, and marital reconciliation. Next come pregnancy, a jail term, and moving house. Personal injury or illness and your partner or a family member having major health issues are all also highly stressful, and so are an unhappy marriage, an unhappy romantic relationship, or an unhappy job environment. Retirement is quite high on the list as well.

Once we’ve identified the causes of stress in our life using resources such as the Holmes-Rahe Stress Scale, the time comes to ask: How do I start reducing my stress levels? I would say what’s required is a two-pronged strategy: there are ways we can reframe our life circumstances, and then there are specific actions we can take.

A Stress-Busting Outlook

According to Dr Georgia Witkin of the Mt. Sinai School of Medicine in New York, one of the top stress-busters is anticipating stress and planning for it. I think this is great advice. I suggest combining it with the following:

• Accept what has happened and close the door after any loss.
• Learn to go with the flow rather than having to control everything and everyone.
• Accept that any life change, whether good or bad, brings a certain amount of tension.
• Realize that you can’t totally prevent change.
• Focus on the present and realize that the past is done.
• Examine your life and reaffirm your life values.

Things We Can Do to Relieve Stress

Each person’s situation is unique, but I think there’s something for everyone in the following list:

• Get out of any significant life situation that is bringing you down – for instance, if you hate your job, quit it.
• Either work to restore an unhappy relationship or leave it.
• Save some money to take care of any crisis, because even though money cannot buy happiness, it is comforting to know it’s there.
• Maintain your relationships with others and have a few confidants.
• Take a holiday that isn’t constantly fast paced.
• Escape into a book, paint, write, sew, or work at a hobby or something creative.
• Listen to dance music, and perhaps dance. Sing! Laugh!
• Follow an exercise programme to make yourself less susceptible, on a chemical level, to stress.
• Clean your living space, reducing clutter.
• Try new activities or follow up on previous interests from the past.
• Do things you know you enjoy, and do them with people you like.

A Good Book

Kimberley L. Brownridge’s 50 Things to Know about Coping with Stress: By a Mental Health Specialist (2020) is a useful book should you want to go more deeply into the subject of stress and how to cope with it.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What manner of stress are you experiencing in your life? What have you tried to do to relieve it? Is there anything you’ve said you would do but haven’t yet done?

Photo: @kylerichards18

Originally posted at: Kyle Richards’ Denim Western Shirt