When I was diagnosed with endometrial cancer, I felt my life closing in. Sometimes if I shut my eyes, I saw a black circle around me. The circle blocked out thoughts of everything but the cancer. My illness was all I could really focus on.

Three weeks later, I had surgery, a complete hysterectomy. When I awoke, I heard the wonderful news: early stage cancer with a good prognosis. I felt the black circle opening up, and my life expanding again.

Happy thoughts – my grandson, a new house, travels with my husband, my writing, gatherings with friends – all came back into my mind.

My recovery from surgery went well, and unlike many cancer patients, I needed no further treatment. Today, I’m energetic and embracing my days.

However, a cancer story stays with you. No matter what your experience was, you are changed. Perhaps you or someone you know is on this journey. Here are some suggestions for putting a positive spin on life after cancer.

Revisit the Good

I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from my family, my friends, and my church. Even these days, I like to remember the visits, the cards, the flowers, and the gifts. I pull out the cards from time to time, and I reread the emails. I focus on the love, not the fear and pain, I felt during those weeks.

Work for Cancer Awareness

I use my blog, Friend for the Ride, to raise awareness of endometrial cancer. I continue to tell my story in a creative and upbeat manner. Perhaps you write, paint, quilt, make music, design t-shirts, garden, bake, or pursue any other hobbies. Think of ways you can use your talents to advocate for early detection and research. Simply telling your story is important too.

Thank the Health Professionals

Shortly after my surgery, with the aid of the hospital’s human resources department, I sent emails praising two nurses and a med tech, who were especially kind to me. I received enthusiastic replies from their department heads.

I see my oncologist once a year for an exam, and I go to my gynecologist six months later. “Thank you for saving my life,” I say each time. What joy it brings me so say those words.

Find Your Cancer Brothers and Sisters

Connect with others who’ve been through something scary like you have, and who worry about recurrence just like you do. Together, you make a strong family! As others are diagnosed, you’re now ready to help them on their journey.

Treat Yourself

A therapist told me: “You’ve been through something terrifying. Treat yourself with exquisite care.” You get to decide what that care is, but be gentle with self-criticism, abundant with self-praise, and treat yourself often to whatever brings you joy.

Do Something New

Several months after my surgery, I tried out for a community theater production of The Dixie Swim Club. I was cast as the zany Jeri Neal McFeeley and had the time of my life. You don’t need to try something so dramatic (pun not intended)! Even visiting a new museum or listening to a different style of music can switch up your mood and help you celebrate the days ahead.

Are you a cancer survivor? Have you found ways to put a positive spin on your experience? Any tips for life after cancer? Do tell us your story! Please join the conversation and share this article to keep the discussion going.

This year, the film Nomadland won three academic awards. Here is a description of the film: “A woman in her 60s, after losing everything in the Great Recession, embarks on a journey through the American West, living as a van-dwelling modern-day nomad.”

Nomadism Is in No Way New to Seniors

In actuality, seniors have been doing a version of nomadic living for many years. Some travel in huge RVs from one park to another while enjoying the beauty of nature and camaraderie with fellow travelers. Others take summer jobs as “camp hosts” at national parks. And still others travel back and forth between the homes of their children and grandchildren.

And then there are snowbirds, who fly south in the winter from snowy regions to places like Palm Springs and Arizona. Then they turn around and head north for the summer to escape the heat.

In 2016, my husband Rito and I spent a month traveling from San Francisco to Alaska and back with our two dogs. I wrote this Sixty and Me blog “How My Alaskan Vacation Gave Me a New Perspective on Life and the World” rehashing the adventure. It was a wonderful experience.

Our pickup truck had a camper shell, and we slept in the back. The dogs slept in the cab. They peeked at us through a tiny window.

So much has happened in our lives and the world since then.

Our Own Idea of Being Nomads

At the end of 2017, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and treated for 18 months. And we all know about Covid that hit in 2020 just as I was getting back into a normal life. I have not been camping since and I miss it. However, I no longer want to climb out of the back of the truck at night to relieve myself.

The idea of purchasing a small cargo van suddenly became an intriguing option. And for my husband, who loves construction projects, this became an obsession. He has watched hundreds of YouTube videos of men, women, and couples who have converted a high-roof van (similar to Amazon delivery trucks) into a mini-home. By the way, we are not planning to live in it, just use if for vacations.

Trying It Out

In April, we decided to give it a whirl. We rented a fully furnished high-roof Dodge Promaster van with a comfortable bed, solar panels, a fan, and a sink. We drove south to Long Beach, California, to visit our daughter and grandson for a few days.

I found that a bucket with a toilet seat and specially designed plastic bags worked much better than climbing out of the truck.

Making the Step, at Last

So this June, we sold our truck and bought a van exactly like the one we rented.

My husband has barely been sleeping these days, working day and night to get it ready for a two-week maiden voyage. We will travel with only one dog this time. Sadly, we lost our bulldog early this year.

We plan to head up the Oregon Coast into Washington State to the Olympic Rainforest and head back down to Ashland, where I will be presenting at a conference. I know that sounds a bit crazy, but we’ll be staying at an RV campground with hot showers and an iron in Ashland!

The Conversion Underway

Our van is NOT ready yet. Rito already put in a floor and some insulation and the bed with a mattress we bought at Ikea. We ordered a solar panel and electrical system that he plans to install, but some parts to connect the panel to the van’s roof will not arrive in time.

He still intends to hook up the electrical system to the car battery. I told my husband that it does not matter if we have to use flashlights and an outdoor camp stove. The van provides a roof over our heads. All I need is a comfortable bed and a portable toilet. We leave in four days!

Why Do This?

You’ll have to wait until “Part Two” to hear what happened on our trip! I decided to write Part One because I want to inspire you to enjoy “young old age” while having health and energy.

Take some risks and chances. Try out some things that you never expected. Find ways to work around obstacles. Life has many twists and turns – so “Make hay while the sun shines.”

Carpe Diem – Seize the Day!

Have you ever traveled in a cargo van or RV? How did it go for you? Where did you go? What accommodations did your RV/van lack? How did you make up for them?

Tinsley Mortimer’s Yellow and Blue Printed Ruffle Dress on Instagram

Tinsley Mortimer Instagram Fashion 2021

Happy Birthday Tinsley!!! Although we’re not sure what Tinsley Mortimer wished upon her birthday cake snowball in hell while celebrating her big day with her fam in Newport, RI (maybe a RHONY contract for next season?!), we really wish we could tell you here that her yellow and blue printed ruffle dress is still in stock. And although that’s not the case, no worries because we’ve included some Style Stealers below that are still total angels in heaven. 

Fashionably,

Faryn

P.S. Check out this post if you haven’t already for more Leo fashion inspa!

Click Here to See Her Caroline Constas Dress in Blue Floral

Photo: @TinsleyMortimer

Originally posted at: Tinsley Mortimer’s Yellow and Blue Printed Ruffle Dress

If you have never experienced the benefits of chair yoga for seniors, you’re in for a treat! Over the last couple of years, I’ve become addicted to this simple, yet powerful, practice. I hope that my passion for chair yoga encourages you to give it a shot!

Why Is Chair Yoga for Seniors So Powerful?

By the time you reach your 60th birthday, you have probably taken two million steps. If you are like most of us, you have probably also dealt with your share of injuries or illnesses. Maybe you have had a hip replacement. Or maybe, like me, you have experienced a broken ankle (or two).

As we reach our 60s, we know instinctively that keeping fit and flexible is essential. But most of us have little tolerance for gyms and aerobics classes.

So, what’s the alternative? Many women I know have turned to gentle yoga, which is a fantastic option for getting in shape after 60. But what if you have mobility problems or are just feeling a bit fragile these days? Maybe it’s time to consider chair yoga.

Is Chair Yoga “Hard Enough” to Work?

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “How could sitting in a chair possibly be good exercise?” Well, based on my own experience with chair yoga, I can tell you that it is surprisingly effective. Best of all, because it is so accessible, it is the kind of exercise option that you will do every single day.

I’ve been doing chair yoga on a pretty consistent basis, and I’ve been super happy with the results. In fact, I would argue that chair yoga was one of the main catalysts for my eventual return to lifting weights, doing cardio and taking group yoga classes.

To keep myself disciplined, I set an alarm to go off every few hours. Instead of doing 60 minutes of yoga all at the same time, I spread my yoga sessions throughout the day. For some reason, this was an easier approach for me to stick with.

As my flexibility improved and my stiffness went away, I started to see a whole world of workout possibilities in front of me. Now I still do yoga, but it is only one part of my routine.

Why Chair Yoga Is Amazing for Seniors

The truth is that yoga can benefit anyone, regardless of age, inflexibility or even disability. There’s a saying among yoga teachers: “If you can breathe, you can do some form of yoga.”

For those who can’t get on the floor to do a traditional mat yoga class, chair yoga offers wonderful health benefits. Here are a few of the many benefits that chair yoga offers to seniors:

Experience Relaxation

Few people stop to think about the fact that relaxation is a skill. We tend to assume that we are not relaxed because the circumstances of our lives are too stressful.

Like any other skill, relaxation can be cultivated through learning and practice. A good chair yoga instructor will start by teaching you yoga breathing skills that you can use not only during class but anywhere, anytime you need to decompress.

Improve Flexibility

Some people assume the loss of flexibility is inevitable with aging. This is a misconception. Flexibility actually works on the “use it or lose it” model. You can improve your flexibility at any age. People who start taking yoga in their 60s, 70s, 80s or even 90s find that they regain flexibility in their joints, connective tissues, and muscles.

Those who continue taking yoga over the long term even report that they not only regain lost mobility but often become more limber than in their younger years.

Reduce or Even Eliminate Insomnia, Arthritis, and Constipation

Most chair yoga participants report that after one to three months of regular weekly classes, they sleep better at night. Many senior chair yoga students who previously experienced chronic constipation have more regular bowel movements without medication. Pain from arthritis, sciatica, chronic backache, and other conditions also tends to decrease or in some cases even disappear with yoga practice.

Don’t Let Excuses Hold You Back from Giving Your Body the Love It Deserves!

Let’s be honest. There are hundreds of excuses that we give ourselves when it comes to starting an exercise program – even one as easy and gentle as chair yoga. Perhaps, like me, you have gained a little extra weight this past year. Or maybe you just feel stiff and inflexible.

Maybe you have an injury. Or maybe you feel that you’re “too busy” to exercise. If anything, these are all reasons to consider chair yoga, not reasons to avoid it!

Now, the big caveat here is that everyone’s body is different, so you should definitely check with your doctor before starting any exercise program. But, that said, I have never met a single person who has regretted starting gentle yoga – especially chair yoga.

It’s not just about the physical benefits. Chair yoga is also a great way to reconnect with your body and calm your mind.

Chair Yoga May Bring You the Confidence You Need

To be honest, when I started doing traditional yoga classes, I found that I was too stiff and inflexible to enjoy the process. It felt like I lacked the balance and flexibility to do even the most basic asanas (movements). So I got discouraged. I wanted to do the positions properly, but even sitting cross-legged was a challenge.

Instead of quitting, as I might have done in the past, I decided to switch to chair yoga classes. Wow! What a difference! Just having the chair to support me addressed many of the flexibility and confidence issues that I was having. Now I’m ready to include other gentle yoga movements into my routine.

Why Not Start Doing Gentle Chair Yoga Today?

If the idea of starting a new yoga program makes you nervous, I want to tell you that I completely understand where you are coming from. I felt the same way too.

There are lots of free chair yoga classes on YouTube which you can do with ease in your own home. If you don’t like the first you try, don’t be put off – find a different teacher and have another go.

Some senior centres also offer chair yoga, so if you want to participate with friends, have a look at what is offered in your local community. Or why not invite some friends round your house, and all do an online chair yoga session together!

Is Chair Yoga Just for Seniors?

I started to realize that chair yoga isn’t just for seniors, although elderly people can absolutely benefit from the additional support. Chair yoga is for everyone. In fact, since boomers spend most of their time sitting, you could argue that we need it most.

You’re Already Sitting – Why Not Make the Most of It?

One of the hazards of modern life is sitting. Studies have shown that sitting for extended periods of time can actually be as bad for you as smoking. One solution is to set an alarm to remind yourself to get up every hour and take a short walk. In addition, adding chair yoga to your daily routine will help to keep your joints lubricated and your body limber.

If you are already sitting, why not add a little chair yoga to your daily routine? Your muscles, joints, and tendons will thank you. And, when you feel good, you will be more productive.

What You Need to Get Started with Gentle Chair Yoga

A Chair

Choose one that allows you to sit upright with shoulders positioned above your hips rather than a seat that encourages you to lean back and slouch. Ideally, try to select a chair without armrests or a chair wide enough that there are several inches between your body and the armrests.

A Strap or Belt

Feel free to use a yoga strap if you already own one. If you don’t have one, you can use a long belt such as one from a bathrobe. You can even borrow your dog’s leash if you want.

A Block or Thick Book

This is most important for shorter people. You want to be able to have your feet flat on the floor while you sit upright on your chair. If that is not possible, place a yoga block or a thick book beneath your feet.

Comfortable Clothes

Ideally, try to wear comfortable clothing which does not restrict your movement. Remove your shoes. It is up to you if you practice with bare feet or with socks.

Here’s How to Get Started with Gentle Chair Yoga

Notice Your Posture

Begin by sitting in your chair without slouching or slumping. Posture is important in yoga not for appearance’s sake but because a hunched position prevents deep breathing and can constrict the spine. Sit so that your shoulders are directly above your pelvis. Position your chin parallel to the floor. Permit the top of your head to point toward the ceiling.

Observe Your Breathing

Most of us breathe in a hurried fashion without even realizing it. The healthiest way to breathe is to take as few as possible slow, deep breaths per minute, using as much of the lungs as possible.

Our lungs are much more spacious than we realize: their surface area is equivalent to the floor of a tennis court. Draw an inhalation into the base of your lungs. Then continue to breathe in, so that you feel your diaphragm expand.

Extend the inhalation further until you experience a sensation of your collar bones rising. Then release the breath as slowly as you can, trying to exhale from the top of the lungs downward.

As far as possible, try to make the inhalation and exhalation equally long. When the rhythm of your breath has slowed down, you are ready to begin stretching. Continue to use your breathing as you perform these movements.

Gentle Chair Yoga Seated Twist

Raise the heels of your feet but permit your toes to remain on the floor (or on your block/book).

Bring your thighs together. Inhale and think of elongating the spine as the lungs fill with air. Exhale and slowly turn your torso toward the right. At the same time that you do this, shift your legs to the left.

Take 3-6 deep breaths in this twisted position, trying to move the upper and lower body further in opposite directions from each other. Then on an inhalation, return to the center. Repeat this seated twist to the opposite side.

You will experience a release of tension and tightness in the back as you perform this stretch. You may want to repeat it two times in each direction.

Gentle Chair Yoga Leg Stretch

Reach forward and loop your strap (or belt or leash) around your right foot. Extend your right leg forward, straightening your knee. Let the heel of the right foot rest on the floor but raise your toes. Gently pull on your strap with your arms as you push the sole of your foot against the strap. Feel the stretch up the back of your right leg.

If you want to take this stretch deeper, exhale and fold your torso forward over your leg, keeping your buttocks to remain planted on the chair seat. The left leg remains bent as you stretch the right leg, with the left foot planted flat on the floor. Inhale and come back up very slowly. Switch sides to stretch the left leg.

Gentle Chair Yoga Shoulder Stretch

Take your strap (or belt or leash) in your right hand. First, raise your right arm toward the ceiling. Then bend your elbow so your right hand comes behind your head or neck. The strap should now dangle down behind your back.

Draw your left elbow out from the body and slightly backward.

Reach your left hand toward your lower back until you can grasp the lower end of the strap with your left hand. Continue to keep your head and torso upright as you perform this stretch.

Take 3-6 deep breaths in the stretch. Think of your breathing as a massage mechanism to loosen the muscles resisting this stretch. Gradually, without lowering your head or rounding your spine, see if you can walk your hands closer together on the strap. Exhale and release this stretch, bringing both hands back to your lap. Then repeat to the opposite side.

Each stretch can be performed multiple times. Or, if you are at the office, perform each stretch once to keep from getting tight, tense muscles from long periods of sitting. After doing these stretches, sit quietly in your chair for a brief period.

Close your eyes. Notice the difference in your body, how your muscles feel more relaxed. Also, observe the difference in your mental outlook. Your internal sense of equilibrium will feel re-calibrated back to a sense of greater calm and balance.

There Is No “Right” or “Wrong” Type of Yoga for Your Age

Many people stay away from yoga because they feel that they are “too old” to get started. Picturing a 20-something woman, twisting herself into a pretzel, they stay on the sidelines, getting tired and stiff. The opposite is true for chair yoga. Since many people believe that chair yoga is just for people with mobility challenges, they think it’s not for them. Both perceptions are misguided.

Have you tried chair yoga before? What was your experience? Do you have a favourite chair yoga instructor? Please join the conversation.

Rituals are actions that symbolically connect us to something that is meaningful. They can be comforting and can help us express feelings, bring about a sense of closure, or keep an important part of the past alive.

Rituals mark time as well as create time. They give us structure in our social world by designating a beginning or an end: Baptisms, Christenings, Bat Mitzvahs, Graduations, Engagement, Marriage, Divorce, Birthdays, First Day of School, Proms, Retirement party, and of course, funerals and memorials.

Grief Rituals

I create Rituals around my losses. As we come to this age, loss and transitions are more prevalent. We transition from a young mother, wife, career builder to grandmother, single, retired. These are some of our losses. We also experience the loss by death of friends, family, and those whose presence we enjoyed – authors, celebrities, or global leaders.

When we create a Ritual around loss, we honor both ourselves and those who are remembered.

The phases of Rituals in Grief are:

• Separation from what was – “My life is now without my spouse, sister, child, friend.”
• Transition from what was to what is and will be – Taking one step at a time as we navigate the void.
• Adjusting to the ‘new’ normal – Living alone, not seeing our beloved, new label (widow, orphan, etc.).

We need Rituals because loss can make us feel that our lives are out of control, filled with deep grief and chaos, and out of balance. Rituals can restore that sense of control.

For example, if we wake up and create a ritual of finding one memory of our loved one, every day, we honor them and ourselves, and it can be the same memory every day! I often think of my sister and how she loved to get in a warm pool backwards down the ladder. Upon entering the water, she would say ‘Ahhhh’ with her eyes closed. She was so happy and that brings a smile to my heart.

Creating a Grief Ritual Does Not Have to Be Complicated

1. Think about (or write down): What is the meaning of your ritual? To bring you comfort; to create something consistent in your chaos; to relieve your stress…
2. Decide when the ritual will take place: Once a day when you wake up or go to sleep; once a year on the anniversary of the event; or anytime.
3. Decide where the ritual will take place: In their favorite chair, by the beach, at a restaurant, in your place of worship, anywhere.
4. Decide who should participate: Sometimes, the ritual needs to involve another person or group such close family. Other times, it can seem more meaningful to do it alone.
5. Create the actual Ritual: Drinking coffee from their mug; going to a special setting, or simply any space that you define as sacred. The Ritual can take seconds, hours, or whatever meets your needs and desires.

Grief Rituals and Your Chakras

Each of your Chakras, the subtle energy centers that engage within your emotional, spiritual, physical, and nervous bodies, holds a key to your Rituals. Wear something, eat something, do something that connects you to your loved one.

Root

The first Chakra, located in your lower extremities, perineum, coccyx, is where we find support, grounding, a sense of stability and trust. The ritual of taking a conscious walk, feeling your body grounded, or massaging your feet can bring grounding and trust.

Sacral

The second Chakra, located in between your pubic bone and navel, offers the flow and connection to your beloved by consciously moving your body through dance, yoga, walking or whatever gives your body some flow.

Solar Plexus

This third Chakra, centered between your navel and lowest rib, honors yourself and is the inspiration to commit to Rituals. Here you will find the fire of your motivation to create and sustain your Rituals.

Heart

The fourth Chakra, located in the center of your chest at your actual heart honors the love that never ends. Photos, memories, and knowing that in death the relationship does not end, it only changes.

Throat

At your throat is your communication with your creative energy. Rituals are creative communications between you and your beloved. This may include writing them a letter, creating fine art, cooking their favorite dish, or whatever expresses your connection.

Third Eye

Just between and above your brows is your sixth Chakra. Rituals provide insight into the flow of your grief. As your two eyes look out, your third eye looks inward to honor your insight, intuition, knowledge and brilliance. Your Rituals opportunities are as vast as your imagination.

Crown

Just above the crown of your head hovers the seventh Chakra. Rituals acknowledge the divine aspect of your connections through mediation, worship, dreams, and unbounded thoughts.

Not only does a grief ritual help you heal as you regain steady emotions, it gives you and other friends and family an opportunity to remember and reflect on your loved one’s life. Having a regular ritual to remember them and honor their life is essential in a healthy grieving process.

Daily Rituals

We have daily Rituals that provide a sense of comfort and continuity. When I awake, my first Ritual is to think of three things I am grateful for. Then I rub my hands and touch the earth to start my day literally grounded.

Your Rituals might include how you make your coffee, taking a walk first thing, or reading the news (watch out that this doesn’t get you stressed!)

My skin care Ritual, which I do first and last thing in the day, includes looking in the mirror and saying “Thank You” and then using facial acupressure to apply with love, care, and awareness, my facial serum (GYG Organic Facial Serum).

Every morning I splash cold water on my face seven times – it feels great. I bless my food as a Ritual. I try to make most of my day as sacred as possible by creating a Ritual around the mundane. I give my small pleasures and necessary actions some meaning.

Here are the Rituals of some great artists and thinkers:

• The rising-at-dawn came from Ernest Hemingway, who was up at around 5.30am, even if he’d been drinking the night before.
• The strong coffee was borrowed from Beethoven, who personally counted out the 60 beans his morning cup required. 
• Benjamin Franklin swore by “air baths,” which was his term for sitting around naked in the morning, whatever the weather.
• And the midday cocktail was a favorite of VS Pritchett (among many others).

Create a Ritual that you commit to once a day or once a year or anytime that brings an inner smile to your being. Rituals offer comfort, creativity, inspiration, and presence.

What you do with awareness becomes living fully in the present. Isn’t that where we all strive to exist?

I invite you join my tribe at https://www.growingyoungergracefully.com and enter drawing for you to win One-ounce bottle of GYG Organic Facial Serum and get a free Facial Acupressure video.

What Rituals have you created in your life? Do you make something special out of mundane things? Do you have a grief ritual for friends and loved ones? Please share the practices you have embraced!