Commonly touted as the most important meal of the day, breakfast often becomes the step-child of the day’s meals by virtue of its timing. First thing in the morning is not when most people want to take the time to plan and prepare a strategically focused meal.

What’s the Deal with Breakfast?

Many will choose the “breakfast in a box,” pre-packaged, or pastry option, while others will simply forgo the hassle altogether and eat when it’s more convenient. This leaves purposeful nutrition at a bit of a handicap. So, the question that I’d like to provide some insight into is this: “Breakfast, is it really that important?”

The short answer is YES, and for both purpose and quality! Why? It is this first meal that will set the stage for the energy balance of your entire day. Your breakfast choice will also make the difference between performing well in demanding mental/physical tasks and falling short.

Why Quality Breakfast Matters

By making a quality breakfast a daily priority, you will:

• Improve energy balance and physical performance
• Enhance mental clarity and cognitive function
• Normalize food cravings (which can prevent binge eating)
• Better regulate blood sugar levels for those with insulin sensitivities.

So What Constitutes a Healthy Breakfast Meal?

Below is a list of ideas for healthy, tasty, and creative breakfast options (and many can be prepared ahead of time to increase convenience):

• Mixed fresh melon (watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew melon, etc.) and broiled lean pork chop
• Fresh mixed berries with steak scramble (eggs with onions, peppers, garlic, & lean steak)
• Diced peach & nectarine with lime juice roasted chicken or turkey breast chunks
• Sliced banana, almonds, blueberries, and strawberries
• Diced mixed melon with roasted salmon steak
• Oats with frozen mixed berries (thawed) and grilled lean turkey sausage
• Fresh grapefruit with sausage/egg scramble (lean turkey or venison sausage)
• Oats with dried cranberries and walnuts with spinach and diced pork loin scramble (eggs, spinach, diced lean roasted pork loin, garlic, and basil)
• Grilled lean pork breakfast chop with grilled fresh pineapple slices
• Southwestern scramble (eggs scrambled with all-natural chunky salsa) with fresh mixed berries
• Hard boiled eggs with cantaloupe and honeydew slices
• Apple slices and roasted almonds or all-natural peanut butter
• All natural/low sugar granola with chopped walnuts, dried berries, and almond milk

The most important things to keep in mind when choosing your breakfast options are:

• Make every effort to avoid simple sugars (as this causes energy crashes)
• Seek options that provide an equal balance of protein, carbohydrates, and fats
• Keep calories modest (400-600 is an ideal range)
• Avoid processed foods (they are difficult to digest and nutrient deficient)

Finally, many breakfast food options can be prepped well ahead of time and stored in the refrigerator for that quick “grab-n-go” convenience that we have all come to enjoy!

What is your preferred breakfast choice? Have you noticed how your energy level throughout the day changes based on your breakfast? Do you put some thinking into preparing a healthy breakfast, or do you avoid this meal altogether?

What is the key to a meaningful relationship? Not just the one you have with your husband, lover, or partner, but any relationship. As we get older, our life journey becomes shorter and time becomes more precious. The answer to that question becomes more urgent. It is more sought after, and often more difficult to achieve.

I’ve noticed that as I age, the realization that I am now on the “other side” of the life span is a glaring fact that is hard to ignore. The balloons at our birthday parties, that we don’t want anymore, now say “Over-The-Hill” and “The Back Nine.” You get the point.

But, as difficult as it is to see those balloons, there is some truth to the words. We grit our teeth, we fake the smiles and force the laugh. Many people are thinking “No! I can’t be that old. How did I get here so fast!”

I remember watching Anthony Hopkins in the movie Meet Joe Black. I cried at the end when he says “Sixty-five years. Don’t they go by in a blink?” The really sad part is that at that time I was only 46 years old. I remember thinking that I had a long way to go before I could say that.

But it’s here. The 60s are here, and my child spirit is in denial that I’ve reached that age. I just don’t “feel” like I should be 60. I’m not fighting it and I’m certainly happy to have reached this authentic stage in life. However, I totally get what Anthony Hopkins was saying. It happened in a blink.

But he also said, “To make the journey without falling deeply in love, you haven’t lived a life at all. You have to try, because if you haven’t tried then you haven’t lived.”

That is what this article is about – how emotional intimacy plays such an important role in meaningful relationships.

What Is Intimacy?

To me, intimacy means not only the physical aspects of loving someone but also the mental connection. It reaches into your soul connecting the head with the heart. It’s the sense of “belonging” that we all want. We have a general desire to love and be loved, but intimacy is the string that connects two beings together.

It involves looking into the eyes and truly feeling the connectedness of souls. Intimacy is the unifying warmth of a hand in yours. It’s a hug that is so tight that you can feel the beating of the other’s heart.

I experience it with my granddaughters. When I take their beautiful little faces in my hands and look directly into their eyes, I feel our souls connect. It is an intimate bond.

I feel it with my husband’s loving hands or my children’s crushing hugs. We are connecting each other’s familiar souls. These are all forms of intimacy that we all depend on to sustain and nurture us.

Trust and Loyalty Are Key Components to Intimacy

We need to take a good look at our relationships. Are we satisfied or are we craving something more? Opening ourselves up to a deeper relationship with another person involves putting ourselves out there.

It means we commit to give our love and receive love back from someone else. Our tender heart is vulnerable and on the line. To love and be loved. To give and receive. It needs to feel safe to offer itself up for love. So for emotional intimacy, trust has to be a key factor.

An intimate relationship needs a sense of trust and true loyalty. We must believe that our love and friendship can be received by someone who is completely loyal to us. It promises that our spoken secrets and dreams will not be shared or ridiculed. It acknowledges that we are accepted just as we are.

Loyalty from a spouse, child, or friend is essential to a deeply rewarding and lasting relationship. A sense of disloyalty can absolutely be forgiven but will more than likely keep a relationship at arm’s length.

We must feel safe. Without that, even subconsciously, a person will hold back. They won’t freely open the door to the possibilities of deeper, more intimate friendship.

Intimacy Loves “Show and Tell”

Talking or sharing is another component that fosters intimacy. We want to share and receive verbal affirmation that we are on the same page. Not only that, but we want to hear about each other’s lives.

Without stepping into personal space, we crave knowing how they are. We love hearing their voices and treasure time spent with them. We make it happen. Our souls love “show and tell” and feels replenished when time is spent together.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Lastly, respect for the other person is key to an intimate relationship. We care about their life journey. We acknowledge it. We respect it. We don’t judge. We love anyway. That is respect.

Understanding these components of relationships, intimate friendship is truly the most rewarding part of living. Do you feel blessed every day with the intimate relationships that you have? I do. And I will continue to do my very best to nurture and care for them the rest of my life. In the meaningful days that lie before us, it is what truly matters.

My wish for all of you today is to fulfill your life with intimate relationships making your precious soul so full of love that you can say “I don’t want anything more.”

Are there people in your life that you would like to have a more intimate relationship with? What is stopping you? Do you feel like you have loyalty in your relationships? If you were to be gone from this earth tomorrow, would your soul be fulfilled?

Of course, I said YES! when I was asked by the Wellness Director of our local YMCA if I might be interested in training to be a lifestyle coach for a new program they are going to offer. It’s one on Diabetes Prevention.

Knowing that I have facilitated and coached personal growth and change over the years, she wondered if I might take on a new topic. Nutrition and health are important topics for me, so I was more than willing to check out their efforts.

What I have learned in the two months since I dove in is sobering.

The Facts About Diabetes

Diabetes is the 7^th leading cause of death in the US, with 29 million people currently diagnosed and possibly 8 million people not aware that they are in danger. There are 3 types of diabetes:

• Type 1: your body does not produce insulin. There is no prevention for Type 1.
• Type 2: insulin resistance. This is preventable though lifestyle.
• Gestational: occurring during pregnancy. This can be a precursor to type 2.

Type 2 Diabetes is reaching alarming proportions in the US with 86 million people diagnosed as “pre-diabetic.” Of those diagnosed, 15-30% will develop Type 2 Diabetes within the next 5 years. Contributing risks are being over 45 years of age, being overweight, having family history, some race and ethnic groups, history of gestational diabetes, and an inactive lifestyle.

There is no cure for Diabetes, whether type 1 or type 2. The long-term effects of diabetes include damage to large and small blood vessels, which can lead to heart attack and stroke, and problems with the kidneys, eyes, feet and nerves. A shortened life expectancy comes along with a diagnosis of diabetes.

Not All Hope Is Lost

BUT the good news is that a diagnosis of pre-type 2 diabetes may be reversible with a few simple (not necessarily easy) lifestyle changes.

As it turns out, there is plenty of evidence that modest weight loss (7%) and increased modest activity (150 minutes a week) can turn a scary diagnosis around. It doesn’t mean starving yourself or training for a marathon. It is simply changing some of the ways you approach food and beginning to increase your activity level. With slow progress in those two areas, it is possible to “recover” from being pre-diabetic.

Obesity is a contributing cause to type 2 diabetes. And obesity is an epidemic in the US. In 1985, 10-14% of the population was considered obese. In 2013, the majority of Americans (more than 60%) were at least overweight with more than 30% being obese. A BMI of more than 30 is considered obese, but since some people resist BMI calculations, from another source:

An obese person is someone who has accumulated so much body fat that it might have a negative effect on their health. If a person’s body weight is at least 20 percent higher than it should be, he or she is considered obese.

Tracking Fat

For weight loss, the Diabetes Prevention Program at the YMCA encourages the simple approach of keeping track of fat grams on a daily basis. No dieting, no foods that are “taboo,” no counting calories. Just track your fat grams.

Since I am going to lead one of the groups, I decided I should experience just how to monitor fat grams in my own diet. I am not overweight nor am I at risk for diabetes at present, but I am concerned about maintaining a healthy and fit body as I go into my 8^th decade. I had put on a few (8?) pounds over Covid restrictions, so I was motivated to see how fat grams might influence my diet as well as my weight.

The program’s guideline is that for someone wanting to lose 7% of their weight and who weighs between 120 and 170 pounds, fat grams should be limited to 33 each day. That seemed like a lot… But then I started making myself aware of just how many fat grams there are in the foods I like to eat.

I do love avocado toast. As it breaks down:

                Half of an avocado = 11 grams of fat

                One slice of cheese = 7 grams of fat

                One egg = 5 grams of fat

                Half tablespoon of butter to cook my egg = 6 grams of fat

Holy cow! That is 29 grams of fat in one dish! I only would have 4 grams left for the day!

However, if I moderate a bit and use one fourth of an avocado, that’s 5 grams of fat. So, right there I reduced fat and still had great taste of a favorite meal. I can use cooking spray instead of butter and save another 6 grams. Taste would not be terribly different, and I now have 11 grams to play with.

Education and Planning Go a Long Way

Planning ahead makes it so that I can enjoy some of my favorite treats with no guilt. Culver’s vanilla frozen custard, one scoop is 18 grams of fat. That leaves me with 15 grams for the day.

Ground turkey meat has 17 grams of fat in a quarter pound while the same portion size of a skinless, boneless chicken breast only has 3.

A little bit of education and awareness has made following the fat gram approach relatively stress (and hunger) free. After 3 weeks of following the fat gram approach and being faithful to walk 30 minutes a day, I am down 5 pounds and maintaining.

It’s Worth It

Avoiding diabetes is worth any effort, in my opinion. Adults with diabetes have higher risks of heart disease and stroke. Diabetes is a cause of 17% of all deaths of people 25 years old and above. Medical expenses that result from diabetes are raised by more than double.

I remember a friend’s mother who had her legs amputated as a result of type 2 diabetes. Diabetes can also lead to reduced vision and even blindness.

While lifestyle change is simple, it can be hard. With motivation and a determined approach, it is possible by making one small change and building from there. It helps to have support and encouragement (which is why I agreed to become a lifestyle coach with the YMCA group-based program), but it starts with a wake-up call and a resolve to take control of your own health.

Here’s to being healthier and happier through controlling what we can with our own bodies and health!

How would you classify yourself in terms of body weight? Have you been diagnosed as pre-diabetic? What have you been doing to reverse this diagnosis? How well do you think you’re managing? Please share with the community!

Kyle Richards’ Blue Under Eye Masks

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 11 Episode 12 Beauty

Currently I am on the west coast working in the central time zone. So I’m starting work earlier than normal and while working on this post I realize my eyes are puffy and tired. Then I realize oh duh my answer is right in front of me. I need Kyle Richards’ blue under eye masks that both de-puff and energize. These masks are quickly becoming essential in the beauty world and I can totally see why (despite my puffy eyes). So while I wait for my mask order to come in I’ll just have to rely on the shocking news of Erika Jayne to keep my eyes wide and awake.

Sincerely Stylish,

Jess

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A tragic reality occurs when women reach the age of 60. Suddenly we become invisible and irrelevant to the rest of the world.

We could ride a musical neon unicycle through a crowded banquet with our hair on fire and water balloons erupting from our cleavage while juggling live crowing roosters, but no one would notice. Trust me. I’ve tried several times, and the nice officers always escort me home.

To retain some dignity and purpose, it’s only appropriate to forget the crowing roosters and establish some Rules for Relevancy before we’re cast aside as useless relics of yesterday. We need to prove we’re not done yet. This will prevent society from consigning us to the dusty shelves of antique stores in summer resort towns.

For a miserable example of just how awful it is for women our age, consider this recent account of trying to get the attention of a sales clerk. My friend Nancy and I were waiting patiently to exchange the bling-covered, thigh-high boots we bought in a moment of unbridled foolishness. Despite our eager attempt at eye contact, the young male employee continued to ignore us.

“If this wait goes any longer, I’ll have to chew these boots for my dinner,” Nancy said.

“Tell me when cobwebs begin to drape from my ears,” I retorted. “That kid will be wearing bifocals before we get some help.”

Then a young woman with a plastic face and noisy bangles came skittering up on her six-inch heels. She shoved her assets in front of us, and received immediate attention from the animated sales clerk. He treated her with adoration usually reserved for the Prize Patrol from the Publishers Clearing House. After being overlooked, once again, we disregarded our childhood instructions to be nice and began to channel our dormant inner sorcerer.

“We could curse her until she spontaneously bursts into flames,” I said.

“No, if we have that much power, let’s turn her into a woman older than we are,” said Nancy.

We cackled like possessed magicians. Nancy felt emboldened and moved closer to the counter.

“You must be so much more important than I am,” she said. “My mama told me not to be pushy like you, so I’ll just continue to wait here looking at your beautiful professionally-enhanced backside.”

She added a toothy smile, raised her eyebrows, and tilted her head ever so slightly. The intruder turned around. She noticed two wild women who were hungry, breathing their last breath of tolerance, and in need of a bathroom. She stammered an apology and slinked away before the sales clerk could call for security.

We high-fived like silly school girls and pushed toward the counter. Nancy and I managed to exchange the boots and meander to a nearby wine bar to create some “Rules for Relevancy for Women over 60.” This list was short because we didn’t know how much time we had before our eyesight failed and our memory couldn’t retain more than five guidelines.

Stop Being a Gracious People Pleaser

That martyr act may have worked thirty years ago when you were easy to manipulate. Now it’s time to stop acquiescing to various demands that diminish your existence. Being confident and assertive are not character flaws.

Create Fun Plans to Get Noticed

If the receptionist continues to ignore you, stand up and sing the long version of the “Bohemian Rhapsody” while playing the air guitar. This delightful distraction is guaranteed to get action. The technique also works with snooty waiters, impassive family members, and bored lovers.

Charm Is Better than Bitchy

If you’re being discounted, try to be lavishly pleasant until doors magically open, sales people roll out the red carpet, and butterflies flutter over the rainbow. If that daydream doesn’t work, use your outside voice and demand attention. Talk, walk, and stand like the Queen of the Universe and attract respect. All you want is acknowledgement that you still matter.

Remember You are a Valuable Resource of Knowledge and Experience

Think of all the technological, historical, global, and social changes you have witnessed! Encourage others to ask about your stories, anecdotes, and memories. Or write them in a memoir. You grew up during a time when television was new and one of the most popular shows included a mother named June Cleaver who wore pearls and called her son Beaver. You survived!

Share the Glory

There are millions of women over age 60, and many of them are lonely, marginalized, and tired. Find these friends, share your crown, and join forces to create a strong, vibrant coalition of self-reliant women who are getting mad as hell about being ignored and they aren’t going to take it anymore.

Together, we can shake our age-spotted fists in the air and holler, “I’m still here, and I’m not going to ride a musical neon unicycle to prove it!”

As the Good Witch in The Wizard of Oz told Dorothy: “You’ve always had the power.” So click those ruby red slippers, grab a little dog or a partner or a carload of friends, and celebrate what remains of your journey.

Start singing your own song about the road less traveled, or the long and winding road, or goodbye yellow brick road, or how you just can’t wait to get on the road again. Don’t forget sunscreen.

Have you ever felt that you were invisible? What is your personal technique for getting attention when someone is ignoring you? Please join the conversation below.