Author: HairWeavings Editorial Team

I can’t think of any other physical activity in life which regularly pairs teenagers with the elderly other than driving. Every day, on superhighways and rural roads alike, cohorts of every age demographic follow, pass, and turn, without regard to who is behind the wheel of the vehicle ahead, behind or to the side.

The Origin of My Fears

I am a happy, healthy, fit, 71-year-old retiree, who has gladly left behind a one-hour commute each way into the city of Philadelphia. I now live in a semi-rural area, where, one might suppose, driving would not be an issue – but it is!

The years spent listening to endless audio books behind the wheel and always feeling like my life was wasting away, have not relinquished their hold on me. Another enduring event occurred a few years ago when my husband was a patient in a city hospital. Daily trips down a long, narrow, numbered street off Route I-95 with its bicyclists, darting street-crossers, and the “stop-sign-oblivious” vehicles at every corner inflated my driving anxieties.

I tell my friends and family that I do not fear illness as my eventual cause of death. I fear a giant black SUV or luxury 4×4 truck crashing into the back of my little, white, energy-efficient Subaru Impreza.

How I Cope

My distaste for driving plays out in taking “the long way” to the city, if I must go. This involves avoiding I-95, and going through the interminable suburban ring-neighborhoods of Philadelphia. My fears also transfer to my husband when he is driving on freeways, especially the New Jersey Turnpike approaching New York City.

I endure those rides with eyes shut tight. However, he’s not such a “big shot” himself, because it is me who must drive across bridges when we travel to New Jersey, because of his new fear.

The Seminal Moment

We are all familiar with stories of taking the keys away from mom or dad. I was in the same situation myself, just a few years ago. No one is asking for my car keys. But there was one life changing event, which has made me re-examine my driving, I’m happy to say!

To get to our home, one must get in the left lane of a highway to access the country road adjacent to our development. One evening at dusk, I was driving home from a restaurant, and literally went about 25 feet past the road as I was making the left turn. Befuddled as to where that country road went, I stopped, and fell prey to the oncoming cars, turning just in time. Something had to be done.

What Do the Experts Say?

Most of the emphasis on senior drivers is with the elderly and the infirmed. Those with too many crashes, near misses and dents on their vehicles will certainly need to endure “the talk” with their families.

However, anyone over the age of 65 should do some reflection. Most of my friends in this age range would heartily agree that they don’t like to drive at night or drive fast on a highway.

The National Institute on Aging lists many declining physical abilities which can contribute to impaired driving: stiff joints and muscles, which make it hard to turn the head; decreased peripheral vision which affects reading road signs; impaired hearing, preventing reaction to horns and sirens; slower reaction time; and possible cognitive decline.

Help Is on the Way

To save my marriage, and to change my behavior, I enrolled in the AARP Smart Driver Course. For a fee of $26.95 for AARP members, one can enroll in an on-line course which results in a helpful reduction in the yearly auto insurance premium. There is only one catch – the course is 8 hours long, and there is no way to speed up the slides. All have a timer at the bottom of the screen, so you can’t press “return” until the allotted time has passed.

At first, I thought I would not be able to endure the slow pace of the content. But I soon found that there was valuable information that was new to me in the areas of safe driving strategies, physical issues related to driving, reduction of distraction, and new technology in later model cars, such as lane departure, collision warnings, and blind spot alerts.

I think “being forced” to stay with the content because of the timer makes the information stick. I’m sure a venerable institution such as AARP created this course with the help of neuroscientists.

Although I completed the course many months ago, I feel incredibly more confident in my driving. I am not embarrassed to take the “long way” to avoid highways, as it was one of the suggestions. I pull over to set up a podcast on a long drive, rather than toggle between my phone and the road. And, I keep eating and drinking to a minimum, and give tractor trailers double the distance I used to give, when I pass.

Suggestions to Senior Drivers

The NHTSA, National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, offers several suggestions to senior drivers, which align well with the AARP Smart Driver course. It is important to stay physically active, as driving requires a lot of movement and highly functioning sensory input. If you have a newer car, take time to learn how to use the unfamiliar technology.

Avoid busy traffic times and poor weather when traveling. Always give yourself more time than you need. Avoid the distractions of talking, eating and listening to the radio or internet when driving in challenging conditions.

This organization also offers a Self-Assessment, if one is not sure there is an issue that needs addressing. The American Occupation Therapy Association offers in-person assessments by driving habilitation specialists for those with more significant impairments.

I can’t say that the Black SUVs and 4x4s don’t scare me anymore, but I’m less likely to be impacted if I’m minding my own business in the right-hand lane, without a cup of tea in my hand during daytime hours!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Are you a driver? Have you noticed any difficulties or fears creeping in lately? What are you doing about them? Would you consider taking a refreshing course?

Refinery 29, the lifestyle site for young women, recently ran a story with the headline, “Girl Trends Are Everywhere. What the Hell is Going On?”

As a regular reader (I like to keep up with trends – you should see my new, chocolate brown “half-moon” manicure!), the site helps keep me current, and I especially laud its efforts at diversity and inclusivity. So, as someone who was once a girl and still occasionally thinks of herself as one, I found it intriguing.

The idea is that women – or anyone who identifies with “girl” and all that word entails – no longer need to mute their femininity and sense of fun. It’s okay to talk about and openly engage in “girl stuff” like style and beauty, to celebrate Barbie, go on “hot girl walks” and trade “girl dinner” tips.

The trend is occurring in music, Hollywood, the literary world and especially online, where even The New York Times explained to us recently “Why ‘Girls’ Rule the Internet.”

As a woman over 70 who attended the 1977 National Women’s Conference, challenged her first employer for equal pay, dutifully wore sneakers with her suits while storming the halls of capitalism in the 1980s and later published as a feminist scholar, I don’t scoff at girl culture.

As the same woman who owns 35 pairs of boots and a raft of false eyelashes, how could I?

From Twiggy to Megan Thee Stallion

Hearing and reading about girl culture at my age brings back memories of my girlfriends and I copying the mod makeup of Twiggy, launching jeans as a fashion staple of choice and jump-starting a second-wave feminist revolution whose principles remain front and center 50 years after the launching of NOW and Ms. Magazine.

This new iteration takes all that is feminine, powerful, snarky, raunchy, ironic, sexy, sweet, funny and pink (think “Hot Girl Summer” by Megan Thee Stallion), and wraps it up into one giant, Ulta-exclusive bento beauty box, daring anyone to complain.

Of course, the debate always goes deeper – from arguments about what “girl power” hides and protects in a patriarchal structure to the reinforcement of stereotypes (or is it turning them on their heads?) and the potential dangers of unfettered nostalgia and infantilizing women.

Not to dismiss any of that – I was a feminist scholar after all – but I, myself, am drawn to girl culture for its promise of bonding and camaraderie, especially as toxic masculinity has become even more sharply defined in global power structures.

Where Older Girls Come In

And that may be where us older “girls” come in.

Imagine a time when girls weren’t allowed to wear pants to school, a time before the birth control pill, when women couldn’t get a credit card in their name and career choices were often limited to nursing, flight attendant or teacher.

That’s my generation. I’m that woman, but I’m also the woman who threw off those bowlines, pioneering the mini skirt, choosing whether to get married and/or have children (often separate decisions), routinely living with romantic partners before or instead of marriage and embracing successful careers, including in law, media, medicine and tech.

One way we made it through the transition from our mothers’ world to the very different one for women today is through girl culture. As “girls” who shared the cultural touchstones of Twiggy, short skirts, long hair and the first taste of sexual lives and health we could actually control, we helped each other get here.

Now that we’re no longer seen as girls, and often not seen at all, according to so many older women, the new “girl” culture may be a path to again sharing our love of things female and feeling good in the process.

Girlie Women Have More Fun

Oppressed and marginalized groups often engage in subversive activities, so if you see older women out walking together, don’t assume that exercising is all they’re doing. They could be engaging in “hot girl walks,” which, as defined on TikTok, are generally four-mile treks in which participants only think or discuss three things – what they’re grateful for, their goals and how to achieve them, and how hot they are. My perfect manicure and I can embrace this concept.

Older women are indeed hot. Just ask the contestants on The Golden Bachelor, which is a ratings goldmine and has women showing support for each other’s humor and grace in the never-ending debate over cosmetic enhancements vs. “natural” aging. (I think the show also involved a man, Gerry Turner somebody, but I’m not sure.)

Many older women care about style, staying fit and healthy, and being seen, even if it’s only by each other.

The truth is, after all we’ve accomplished, our embattled minority status has given way to something more mainstream. It’s nothing short of joyful to see girls rule the internet and take over everything that trends. We did it in our own way in our girl days, so there’s no need to stop now, right?

Data analytics show that females of a certain age respond to the words “older women” in web copy, so perhaps you’ve been seeing that term more these days. I know I chafe at being called “lady,” though “elder” might be okay.

But since “girls” are in, I vote for “older girls” as the preferred term when talking about what’s en vogue for those of us who find meaning in things like the 50^th anniversary of Fear of Flying as well as Barbie’s entrée into senior status – because we were there when they launched the first time around.

If you would like to read the mentioned article on Refinery 29, please click here: Girl Trends Are Everywhere. What The Hell Is Going On?

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Have you noticed the “girl” trend these days? Does it relate to anything in your past? Can older women still be “girls” in a fun and empowering way? How do you celebrate girls and women in different stages of life?

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Originally posted at: Lisa Hochstein’s Ivory Jumpsuit

It’s Lesson 23 and this week we are skipping ahead to p.71 in your Upper Hands Piano, Book 1 to learn a new note and Swing rhythm, and we’re also learning some holiday songs, because there is no better way to celebrate than with music!

[NOTE: If you are just joining us for the first time, you can find my previous Sixty and Me Free Piano Lessons on my Author page. You can join our lessons any time and move at your own pace!]

23.1 Swing and New Treble Note A4 in Erie Canal p.71

On p.71 you learn a new treble note A4. This A is a skip below middle C and is the same A you learned in the bass staff on p.64 (see the bottom of p.71). The only difference is that this A is played with your right hand. As you can see, treble and bass notes can overlap. Higher notes are generally on the treble staff and lower notes on the bass staff; however, notes can be assigned to either the treble or bass staff depending upon which hand the composer wants you to use. A4 is 2 ledger lines below the treble staff.

Notice also that we use a Swing rhythm in Erie Canal. Swing means that the Eighth notes are played in a long/short bouncy rhythm instead of evenly. (Note: Quarter notes are still played evenly, as usual, we only “Swing” the eighth notes.) Watch this video I made in 2012 to demonstrate Swing for an earlier edition of my book. I was so young!

23.2 Erie Canal slow demonstration, p.71

Here is a slower, overhead demonstration of Erie Canal. Notice that the fingering is a bit tricky as we add additional notes. Pay attention to the circled fingerings which alert you to move your hand, extend your fingers, or to cross fingers over, in order to reach all the keys:

I love the holidays, and this year I think we need music more than ever to bring joy and appreciation to our celebrations. I have arranged Sevivon, a traditional Hebrew Chanukah song, and Angels We Have Heard on High, a traditional Christmas Carol. These are a little beyond the level you have been playing, so start practicing now!

Note: You can always play right hand alone in passages where adding the left hand feels too difficult.

Neither song uses Swing rhythm, but you will be playing the new Treble note A4 in Sevivon, and that same note A4 in the Bass staff in Angels We Have Heard on High. I hope you find time to play them both! And to share your song(s) with family or friends during your holiday celebrations! Playing music is a great gift to loved ones.

23.3 Sevivon

(Print your Sixty and Me sheet music here – scroll down, bottom right.)

Sevivon is a song about Chanukah dreidels that also celebrates the miracles of life and light. On the third and fourth lines you will see that the fingering moves around quite a bit. For example, on the first note of the third line, you will need to move your hand to the right a bit to get your RH 3-finger on the E. Then notice in the third line, second measure, you will play that same E with your 4^th, then your 5^th finger.

It is not uncommon for a pianist to use a different finger when repeating a note. As you get more advanced, playing more keys, your hands have to cover a greater distance, and fingering gets more complicated.

Be very meticulous with your fingering! Play the song slowly, learning the fingering correctly from the start so that you don’t have to undo your fingering habits later. I chose this song for you specifically because it includes the new note you are learning in Erie Canal: A4, the A which is a skip below middle C in the treble staff.

23.4 Angels We Have Heard on High

(Print your Sixty and Me sheet music here – scroll down, bottom right.)

The tune of Angels We Have Heard on High comes from a traditional French Song with English lyrics that celebrate angels singing at the birth of Christ.

Notice you are playing the same A4 you learn in Erie Canal, but it is in the Bass staff and played with your left hand. You will move your left hand 1-finger from G to A then back to G in the first line, second and third measures, and the last line, third and fourth measures. It is not uncommon for pianists to move fingers around this way in more advanced music. So few fingers, so many keys! Watch my demonstration video to see what it looks like to move your 1-finger in this way:

Passion Practice

1. Exercise #4 – Play in F# and D-flat with each hand. Try playing it using a metronome set to 3/4 time, at whatever tempo (speed) you can play it without pausing.
2. Erie Canal p.71 – Watch my demonstration videos 23.1 and 23.2 above then practice the song slowly. There is no left hand in this song!
3. Chord Calisthenics #4, Appendix viii – Play the minor triads from C minor to D-flat minor as whole notes, with each hand. After you learn F#m and Dbm, use a metronome and hold each chord (Cm-Dbm) for 4 beats at around 70 bpm. Record yourself to make sure you are staying on the beat!
4. Holiday Songs – Print you sheet music HERE (scroll down to bottom right). Play Sevivon and/or Angels We Have Heard on High. They both include your new note A4, Sevivon in the Treble Staff, and Angels We Have Heard on High in the Bass staff. Watch the demonstration videos above to check your fingering and rhythm. If you prefer to not play holiday songs, please review Largo on p.57.

Let’s Have a Conversation!

Do you like the long-short lazy sound of Swing rhythm? Can you think of any songs with a Swing feel? Has music been a part of your holiday traditions? What are some of your favorite holiday songs?