Cynthia Bailey’s Metallic Leopard Gown

Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 12 Episode 16 Fashion

While I still have ten minutes to go in last night’s episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, if the season wasn’t so good I’d say that I’ve seen everything I needed to already after seeing Cynthia Bailey’s metallic leopard gown.  She’s absolutely stunning and the dress is something I could rock myself. But then I remembered that I saw a preview of Tanya Sam showing up, and I’ve decided to sit back, eat some cookies and see what what ensues.

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Click Here to Shop her Jovani Gown

Originally posted at: Cynthia Bailey’s Metallic Leopard Gown

When difficult things are happening in the world—climate change, sexual assault cases, and gun violence, for example—sometimes beauty brands try to step up. It’s not always successful but Lush’s Mi Casa Es Tu Casa soap is one of its charitable products that makes sense for both the brand and the organizations it’s supporting. According to NBC News, 24 migrants have died in US custody during the Trump administration, including at least seven children. And that’s not to mention the more than 5,400 children separated from their parents at the Mexico border since July 2017.

“What we’re seeing happen to migrants on a daily basis is unconscionable,” said Carleen Pickard, Ethical Campaigns Specialist at Lush Cosmetics North America, in a statement. “The increasing harassment from ICE, children ripped from their parents, narrowing criteria for asylum and the dangerous narrative being spun about a threat to our country. It’s time we showed up for communities and demanded safe passage for all those who express freedom of movement—no exceptions.”

Lush launched its limited-edition Mi Casa Es Tu Casa soap with the goal to raise an estimated $350,000 for organizations fighting for migrant justice such as United We Dream, Community Change and Mijente. 

Image: Lush.

The vegan, handmade soap is in the shape of a house and available in four bright colors. The scent might remind you of another favorite, the spicy and woodsy The Smell of Freedom Perfume. It features a calming combination of lemongrass and fire tree oil. All proceeds (minus the tax) will be donated to those important grassroots organizations. 

Lush is kicking off a new campaign with the soap: Freedom of Movement. The company is calling for the “equality, unity, dignity, security and liberty for all those who migrate to North America.” All 208 Lush stores will serve as ICE Free Zones, becoming safe places from harassment.

Image: Lush.

Support the movement by purchasing a Mi Casa Es Tu Casa soap and/or donate to the causes above.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

As the years go by, some of us may feel that a two- or three-bedroom home is too big or too expensive to maintain. However, there are many aspects to downsizing that we may not be able to see on our own.

Today, Margaret is joined by financial experts Pam Krueger and Beth Greulich to help us determine if downsizing really is our best option.

How to Know If You Need to Live Smaller

Some people over 60 may find themselves having space that they think they do not need or find too much of a hassle to maintain. However, there are many factors to consider when you’re making such a big change.

Shared Spaces

Some of us have lived in big homes for a long time. We don’t really think about having neighbors that are too close and too loud and the other aspects of living in shared spaces.

Family Visits

We may have children, grandchildren, or other family members who would want to come home and stay for the holidays.

This means that relatives would need to stay at a hotel. If they come to visit often, it may become more expensive in the long run.

Other Expenses

Smaller is not always cheaper.

Some states freeze property taxes for seniors, who end up surprised that taxes are much higher than what they are used to once they move.

For this kind of decision, it helps a lot to have someone do the numbers for us to check whether downsizing is the right step.

What Is “Rightsizing”?

Downsizing is not always the answer – you need to consider your needs and “rightsize.” Consider if moving really is the best step for you, both financially and emotionally.

Financial Considerations

Some people move houses to avoid maintenance costs but pay a hefty amount for capital gains taxes and wind up losing more.

Before committing to moving, do your homework first. You know you’re on the right path if you’ve done more thinking than moving.

Emotional Considerations

Not a lot of people talk about this, but the emotional aspect of moving is very important.

Figure out what’s important to you. Take a walk around your home and look through the physical objects that hold beloved memories gathered through the years.

It is very important that you feel comfortable with your decision.

Getting the Right Kind of Help When Retiring

A financial advisor can help you check your numbers and determine what step you should take towards financial comfort in retirement.

Most people think financial advisors are only for investing; they don’t realize that a financial advisor can help them with every aspect of their life.

When choosing to trust a financial advisor, make sure to ask the right questions to know if they are the right fit for your situation. Tools like Wealthramp can help match you with a financial advisor who specializes in what you need.

Have you thought about downsizing and decided that rightsizing is the better route for you? What made you change your mind? Let us know in the comments below!

The best fight my parents ever had was the day my father tried to outrun my mom in their own house.

Before
I get into the story, there’s something I should share about Annie, my mom.
She’s slow to anger and she’s not a yeller. In truth, my mom’s as placid as a
petunia, and people gravitate to her, gather around her.

A
caretaker, never the center of attention, she’s had the same best friends for 60
years. She was an orthopedic nurse and started her career in her 40s.

So,
when we three daughters heard about this squabble, we were aghast. We wanted
details.

How
it started wasn’t clear. Mom said my dad was working on something around the
house. She didn’t like the way he was handling it and gave him further
instructions. He said he knew what he was doing. The thing was, my mom used
tools as well as my father.

My
dad turned his back and left the room.

“Don’t
walk away from me,” she said. My father walked faster and so did my mom. “I’m
coming after you,” mom yelled. My father sprinted into the bedroom and locked
the door.

“Come
out,” said my mother. No sound from within. “Come out or I’ll break down this
door.” Still no sound.

My
mom lifted her foot and drove it into the door, splintering it. The door gave
way and my father ran giggling into the bathroom and slammed that door.

“Don’t Walk Away from Me,” She Said

My
mom hulked outside the bathroom. “Better come out or I’ll break this one, too.”
A moment passed. “I’m not kidding.”

After
another moment, the door opened, and my father came out. “I knew you
weren’t kidding,” he said, hugging her. “I can afford to fix one door only.”

There
are fights in the best relationships, but I always knew my parents loved each
other. My father, a yeller when I was growing up, never yelled at my mom.

My
father died when my mom was only 64, but she was never interested in dating.

“I
had a good marriage. I enjoyed my children,” I remember her saying. “I’m not
interested in another relationship.”

These
days, when relationships come and go like so many tweets, I think of what made
my parents so good together. I realize it’s my mom’s attitude – as well as my dad’s, back in the day.

Plus,
relationships come in all forms, and my mom has maintained 60+ years of
friendship with her two dear friends, Hilda and Florence.

95 Years Old and My Mom Texts

At
95, my mom’s flexible and optimistic, open to learning. Despite poor eyesight
from macular degeneration (which I have inherited) and lordosis, an excessive
inward curvature of the spine, she greets each day with 45 minutes on her bike,
a freshly-brewed cup of coffee, and a shower.

She
lives alone with help twice a week but prepares her own meals.

And
texts.

Which
reminds me. A few weeks ago, a friend told me her husband refuses to text. “He
says he’s too old for that silly texting stuff. It’s frustrating when he calls
and I’m in the middle of something at work.”

My
friend’s husband is 65.

“My
mom texts,” I say. “Tell your husband to grow up,” I tease, knowing he’ll laugh
at this.

It’s
true. My sister showed Mom how to use the microphone function on her phone, and
she’s never looked back. Of course, she has some difficulty reading small print
on the phone, but she persists.

Relationships Come in All Forms

Mom
listens to audiobooks on her Kindle, now that reading has become difficult. She
loves J.D. Robb, Lee Child, and is open to new authors as long as they write
page-turners.

She
never complains. Never did. She accepted my father for who he was – the key to any successful relationship,
really.

And couples
have disagreements.

The
thing is, my parents never held a grudge against one another, and my mom didn’t
believe in the silent treatment. These days, I brag about her. If she can’t
sleep at four in the morning, she’ll get up and ride her stationary bike.

Me
­– I turn on the television if I can’t sleep.

Last
September, when I visited with her, we were saying our good nights at around 9
pm when she announced, “I’m going to ride my bike.”

“Now?
You’re riding your bike now?”

“Sometimes
I ride my bike at night. It helps me sleep better,” and off she went.

Not
only does my mom set an example when it comes to a strong primary relationship,
she sets the standard for aging gracefully. Without a partner.

Your Relationship with Yourself

Don’t
forget, relationships include the one you have with yourself. As we age, it
becomes a struggle to accept the changes to our body, and our physical
limitations loom greater. Maintaining relationships in spite of a loss of
independence becomes crucial.

“That’s
really important,” Mom said when I mentioned this. “That’s why I take the
special senior bus.” When she and her friends could no longer drive, they had
to find ways to visit one another, a real challenge.

Mom
recently lost a childhood friend, Florence, whom she’d known since they were
kids, and I’m sure she thinks of her every day.

My
mom has nurtured her relationship with my cousin, Dusty, who comes over every
couple of weeks and has a tuna sandwich with my mom. He stays a couple of hours
or takes her on an outing.

This
past fall he took her to the beach, and they strolled the boardwalk together;
she with her walker, a bent-over, tiny silver-haired lady and my six-foot
cousin in his customary jeans and T-shirt.

When
she told me the story, I imagined them, pictured the stir they made. “A lot of
people said hello,” my mom said, and I could feel her pride in knowing she
board-walked along with a much younger crowd.

Seasoned Characters Have Stories

Older
people, meaning those significantly older than I am, interest me these days.
Perhaps it comes from living in an area with an older population. A daily
reminder not to take anything for granted.

I
need to gather together the old family recipes for coleslaw and potato salad,
and the prune hamantaschen from my grandmother. Even if I never make them. Part
of cherishing our relationships is having them live on after we’re gone.

Living
a long life is not easy. I’m inspired that my mom finds the best, not only in
each day, but in all of us.

Excuse
me, please, dear reader. My mom just texted.

Which
relationships do you find easies to maintain? What do you do to show your loved
ones you appreciate them? Please share your thoughts.

You may have seen an email, social media post,
or cartoon that tells you how crazy you’d be to go to a nursing home. Hotels
are cheaper and they have swimming pools, etc. “Why go to a nursing home when
you can retire to a hotel?”

The article invariably points out the differences
in cost and quality of life. It’s fun to compare them, and it makes us feel
better about getting older. “Sure,” you think to yourself, “when I get older,
I’ll just check into a hotel, like the cool kids.” Before you turn in your
house key for a hotel card, consider these points:

Getting Extremely Personal

At a nursing home,
the staff will get to know you. They will know your name, your medical history,
your plan of care, your next of kin, your
food allergies, and why Annette was your favorite Mouseketeer.

Assistance Is an Arm Away

If you need help
getting from the bed to the toilet, someone will come help you. Probably
nicely. They will help you bathe, dress,
walk, go from the bed to the chair and back again, all while helping you
remember the name of that one actress who was in that movie with the dog. Not
that one, the other one.

Personal Care

If you have an
accident, they will clean you up. Seriously, that’s a big deal. They will check
on you repeatedly if you are ill and will
call your family members with updates.

Medication Schedule

They know your
medications. They know what you have already taken, and what you haven’t yet.
They know the difference between vyzulta
and xalatan. (Who names these drugs? Is it a cat on a keyboard?)

But perhaps the most important quality of a
nursing home is this:

They Will Not Ask You to Leave

You will not be asked to check out because:

• You fell (again).
• You wandered into
  another person’s room and changed the TV channel because there is so much
  yelling on that show and it’s upsetting to you.
• You gave your
  candy away and then claimed someone stole it.
• You wouldn’t stop
  complaining about President Ford and the farm bill of 1975.
• You snapped at
  the aide who kept you from drinking the “apple juice” you found in the specimen
  cup on the counter.

Hotels are great, though, don’t get me wrong. If
you really want to retire to a hotel rather than a nursing home, here are
several things you can do that will make a huge difference:

Do Strength Training

Do as much strength training as you can, as
often as you can. A person cannot become too strong. Let me share something
with you – it might not feel good to train, but it feels good to be strong. There
isn’t a pickle jar at the store that I cannot open. As a side note, don’t try
this unless you really like pickles.

Do Mental Training

Do things that are mentally challenging, like
playing chess, learning a musical instrument, or remembering where you parked
your car at the mall.

Work on Your Social Skills

Do stuff you care
about with people you care about. Now
is the time to go out and connect with people. Find your tribe and let your enthusiasm
take you on an adventure. Your new best friends are out there, waiting for you!

Make Healthy Choices

Living in good health is much more about avoiding
disease than it is about surviving disease.

Healthy Choices

To live healthy:

• Avoid tobacco.
• Wear your
  seatbelt.
• Keep your weight optimal.
• Get a good night
  sleep every night.
• Drink lots of
  water, eat healthy foods.
• Go to the doctor
  and get your immunizations.

Unhealthy Choices

Well, consider unhealthy all the stuff your
mother told you not to do.

Most of us will need skilled nursing care at
some point in our life. If you do end up spending time in a nursing home, keep
in mind one last piece of advice:

Be nice to your long term care nurses – they’re the ones choosing the size of your
catheter.

What do you think are the pros of nursing
homes compared to hotels? Where do you think you’d feel best taken care for?
Please share your thoughts with our community!