I am curious what caught your eye on this article, the picture or the title? We’ve heard that a picture is worth a thousand words, and I think that applies here. When I first saw this sign, my brain did one of those fill-in-the-blank tricks. You know when your brain thinks it knows what it just read but when you read it again, it isn’t really what you thought? Does the sign say Man for Sale or Man Sale, for example? Hah! It said Man Sale.

I was riding in the car with my husband and chuckled when I read this sign. Once I realized what it said, I told myself it must be a tool sale. We were driving in rural Wisconsin at the time, and it caught his eye too. Since he has a handyman business, he was immediately interested. So, we followed the signs and drove to the edge of a yard where there were multiple tables, a tent, and a garage with more tables. Yep, it was a tool sale.

I chuckled again as I realized I was not the only woman browsing (pretend browsing actually, my husband was genuinely interested in tools that I wasn’t even sure what they were for). Then I heard the owners of the sale talking to other browsers about how they had been asked by other women who’ve stopped whether they also have men “for rent” (in case they wanted to return them if they didn’t work out). It all made me chuckle again.

Such a variety of tools were available. Some still in their original box, some rusty antiques, some novel items even my husband never knew existed, and some boxes of multiple small gadgets. Truly a Man Sale after all, in my mind. I consider myself to be very spoiled with a fix-it husband, so I don’t feel the need to know that stuff.

The Power of Words

Ah, the power of words, signage, and perspective. It made me think again about perspective, and how our own personal perspective on anything becomes our reality. I was talking with a woman in her 80s the other day, for example, about the price of a piece of cheesecake in a restaurant.

In one breath, she was observing how ridiculous it was for a piece of cheesecake to sell for $7. And in the next breath, she was asking about options for her maturing $100,000 CD that she doesn’t need. Her perspective was disbelief; mine was blessed irony.

Truly, to each his own. Our perspective is based on our own experiences. Who are we to judge anyone else when we have not walked in their shoes? I am not referring to extreme behaviors like criminals but more to everyday people, opinions, and actions.

It Makes You Think

So back to my sign. I started thinking more about my perspective about the tools. How would I feel if suddenly my husband was no longer in the picture to spoil me by taking care of all repairs/maintenance in our home? Would I venture into wanting and buying tools at a Man Sale to make sure I have what I need? Or do I know that I would resort to hiring help for those types of things?

I know several women who amaze me at what they know and take care of around the house. Would I become them? I think my perspective is that I am not cut out for that type of problem solving so I would need to find another handyman. Home repairs and auto work are two areas women often need to deal with for the first time after losing a spouse.

Make a List

So, I have asked my husband to tell me where he keeps his list of people he refers work to when he can’t get to it himself. Feels like a morbid thought, yet all part of my ongoing attempt to expect the best but plan for the worst. To take the overwhelm out of that perspective, I compiled an Ultimate Makeover Checklist (with 3 steps each month)to plan in advance for the money side of life, whenever that change comes.

It’s all about perspective. Are we focused on “death planning” or “life planning” when we think about these times that are guaranteed to come to fruition in the future? Taking action on that planning is the hard part. Maybe start with something smaller, like how to Avoid 3 Common Estate Planning Mistakes.

One last chuckle to share. We drove by the sign the very next day, and this is what we saw:

It turns out they do this sale annually and the price is right on the last day. That won’t change my perspective on my need for tools. But it sure keeps me grateful for my husband’s talents!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What is your perspective on “life planning” vs “death planning”? Anything that helped you take action in this area? Please join the discussion!

Centuries ago, Persian poet Rumi famously wrote, “What you seek is seeking you.” Many have interpreted this quote to mean our desires are attracted to us as much as we are attracted to them.

If this is true, what gets in the way of our desires finding us? And how can we consistently get our innermost desires met after 60?

The answer to both questions can be found in the ways we navigate the different paths to our desires.

In this article and the accompanying video, I am going to show you how to navigate the path to your desires after 60 with more ease and joy.

Navigating the Path of Your Desires

There isn’t just one path to your desires. There are many.

The path you choose will ultimately determine the fate of your desires and whether or not they are fulfilled in the ways you originally intended.

Why are multiple pathways relevant to getting your innermost desires met after 60?

When you are consciously aware of which path you are on, you can more effectively and effortlessly navigate the obstacles and opportunities that show up.

This is how you easily and more joyfully go from where you are now to where the life of your dreams and desires lives.

The 5 Pathways to Your Desires

Over the course of my life, I have taken many paths to reach my desires. Not all of them took me to where I originally wanted to go.

My experiences led me to an inner awareness of how to better engage with my desires. This opened my eyes to the five pathways.

Once I understood how to identify them, it became easier to take the path of least resistance to having my desires fulfilled.

Here are the five pathways:

Fulfill the Desire

On this path, you engage your desire with excitement and are relentless in your pursuit of turning it into reality.

In spite of any obstacles you face on this path, your passion and excitement lead you to your desired destination.

Abandon the Desire

This is the path where you consider the viability of the desire and even take some initial steps to achieve your desired outcome.

Somewhere along this path, however, one of two things occurs.

You fall out of love with the desire or your passion and excitement for it is overtaken by limiting beliefs. Either way, this is the path where you abandon your desire.

The New Desire

This path begins with a specific desire but opens you up to a new and far more attractive desire.

Like the previous two paths, you either achieve your desired outcome regardless of what obstacles show up or you unconsciously sabotage yourself and abandon your desire.

Desire Is Not for You

Not every desire you have is for you, which makes this path unique and sometimes tricky to navigate.

In some instances, when a desire comes to you after 60 it’s associated with your past. This means the desire may not be aligned with who you are or where you are now. Letting it go or going after it requires being honest with yourself.

The other aspect of this path is when a desire comes to you but it’s for someone else. This path then leads you to share the desire with the person it is for.

You Do Nothing

This path is paved by your limiting beliefs and overseen by your inner critic. For this reason, it is the path of unfulfillment.

When you are on this path you feel the initial excitement of your desire. You may even daydream and fantasize about the desire.

But you do nothing proactive to have it met. This is because you believe it’s safer to ignore your innermost desires after 60 than to try and fulfill them.

A Mixed Bag of Results

Whatever unique experiences you have had with your own desires, they are almost always experienced on one of these five paths or a distinct blend of them.

Unfortunately, when most people want a desire to be fulfilled, they either dismiss it as unreasonable or immediately set in motion a flurry of physical activities to achieve it.

In either scenario, few are consciously aware of what is driving their behavior or whether the path they are on is the right one. This usually leads to a mixed bag of results at best or an emotionally distressing outcome at worst.

Therefore, the more you are consciously aware of how you interact with your desires, and what path you are on to fulfill them, the capacity for manifesting your desired outcomes becomes easier and more fulfilling.

Please join me in the video where I will share additional insights on this topic along with three journal prompts and a four-step action item to help you integrate what you are learning.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What gets in the way of our desires finding us? How do you consistently get your innermost desires met after 60? What is your experience with one or more of these five paths? And if you have experienced a unique path to your desires that isn’t mentioned, please share it with the community!

I am at the stage in my life where I find myself reflecting on who I was and wondering who I desire to become. I have changed so much through the different stories of my life – from the demanding young woman who struggled so hard to like herself and enjoy her life, to the woman that I am today who is happy in my skin and appreciates what each day offers me.

At 63, I find myself on the threshold of a new becoming and a sense of new possibilities. The questions that arise for me are around what do I really desire, and what’s next? As a body confidence author/expert and age empowerment coach, I work with these themes every day with my clients whose ages span between age 40 plus to early 90s.

It is never too late or too early to engage in this wonderful practice of self-enquiry. I invite them to ponder on their own answers to these questions and although the questions seem simple to answer, they can be deceptively challenging.

What Do You Really Desire?

When I ask the question, “What do you really desire?” the answers often revolve around, “I want to be happy, or to feel peaceful or just enjoy my life now.” And whilst these are wonderful answers, they don’t really clarify or expand on what being happy truly means or what kinds of things or thoughts make the person feel at peace or allow them to enjoy their life right now.

When you begin to dig a little deeper into what is behind those answers, you begin to discover a whole new story waiting to be born and created.

This is exciting because it offers us a chance to take stock of where we have been, what we have learned and what we desire to create and experience in the future.

Coming of Age at 60 And Beyond

Many people feel that as we age, we have no new stories to be created, told, lived out and enjoyed, however the reverse is true. Age brings us a new sense of maturity and inner knowing of what it is that we truly desire to create and how we wish our lives to be. There often is a clarity as we grow older that is not there in our youthful years. I feel this strongly within myself.

My younger self was often swayed by what other people thought or expected of me, and I lived my life teetering on, seeking external validation and doing things to please others rather than what I authentically desired to do.

Indeed, many people only come into their fullest sense of personal joy, power and authenticity after the age of 60.

For example, Louise Hay, (mind body pioneer and founder of Hay House Publishing) didn’t start writing until her 50s and started her business (Hay House) in her 60s. Equally, Frank McCourt, author of Angela’s Ashes didn’t start writing until he was 65.

It begs the question… what if ageing didn’t bring about decline but a renewed sense of passion and possibility and our greatest accomplishments?

Regenerate Rather Than Reinvent

I like to think of regenerating ourselves rather than reinventing who we are. Reinvention often feels as if we have to wipe the slate clean and start again completely from scratch. This doesn’t take into account all of the experiences that our lives have given us and what has helped make us the people that we are today.

However, regenerating ourselves means that we build on more of who we are. We take the lessons and our life experiences, and we weave them into possibilities for the future. We know what hasn’t worked for us and what we no longer desire in our life, and we know what lights us up and how we love to express ourselves in ways that suit us.

Enjoy These 5 Tips for Re-Imagining and Regenerating a New Life Story

#1. What Is the Vision That You Have for Living Your Best Life?

Are there dreams that you have put on the back burner or are keeping for when the time feels right? Do you long to travel, start your own business, spend more time with your family, take up a new hobby or activity? Maybe you would love to learn to dance, write a book or be part of a like-minded community? How would you love to spend your days? What lights you up or nourishes your soul?

A friend of mine went to Argentina to learn how to Tango when she was in her 60s and still teaches Tango lessons today in her 80s! How fabulous!

Write your visions down. Begin to collate a vision book and add to it with pictures, quotes and research how you might bring your visions to life. Everything in our life begins first in the imagination. It is here that dreams are born and built upon. Creating a vision book is a powerful actionable step towards creating a new life story. This is your template from which you can add to and build on.

#2. What Is the Theme for Where You Are Now and What You Desire to Unfold in the Near Future?

When you look at the ideas, visions and dreams you have in your vision book, is there a theme that runs through them? Choosing a theme often helps us to solidify where we are and where we are heading. A theme can be anything.

As I look at my own vision book, the themes of movement, writing, art and creativity seem to sparkle through the pages. I know that the story I am creating now needs to include these themes for me to feel fulfilled and nourished. What themes feel alive for you right now? Bear in mind that themes can also be seasons, colours, emotions, places and people.

#3. What Words Describe Your New Story?

As in every story, the words that we read will either light us up, excite and entice us, or make us feel bored, despondent and disconnected. This tip invites you to come up with 3 to 5 core words that describe your new story.

Imagine that your new story is a book you desire to read and there are three to five words on the front of this book that stand out and draw you towards it. What are these words? For example, when I think about my own story, the words that come up for me are wild, free, loved, abundant and joyful.

#4. Don’t Just Leave a Legacy – Live One!

It is in living out our passions and inner dreams that we create the legacy that we leave for others. The words from the late Wayne Dyer (Author) feel very pertinent here when he said, “Don’t die with your music still in you.”

It reminds me to create, do and experience all of the things that are within me and not hold back in my life. I spent far too long in my early life doubting myself and feeling not good enough. That was my old story. My new story knows I am good enough and seeks to create from this place of self-love and authenticity.

What is the music that is still inside you? What story do you long to share, create, write, dance, sing, paint or tell? Only you can give this to the world. Only you can share your passion, your light, your journey and your dreams. If you don’t create it or allow it to happen, who will?

#5. Take Action

Every story needs to be written. Nothing happens without action. We can have dreams and ideas in our heads for years; however, until we take action, they will remain dreams and ideas. Sometimes, taking action on our dreams can feel overwhelming. It may feel too big or too scary to step into what we truly desire.

The key is to take “baby steps” of inspired action. Choose small, do-able steps that make you feel good. This might mean that you simply spend some time researching ideas. Or it may mean that you start to free up more space in your day to focus on what you want. Every single day, choose one small action that you can do to honour your ideas and begin to bring them into reality.

A lovely lady I worked with years ago wanted to create a new story which was full of health and vitality. She began to make small changes to what she ate and started a new fitness regime of walking every day. She began with just two minutes and increased this as she became stronger and fitter.

It is the small consistent actions that we take that create the most positive results. Remember that it is the journey that needs to thrive and be enjoyed – not just reaching the destination.

For more beautiful life tips and inspiration, do follow me on Instagram. I would love your company.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What is a new story that you would love to create? What is the music that is still inside you?

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Photo: @therealmargaretjosephs

Originally posted at: Margaret Joseph’s Brown Floral Satin Maxi Dress