Chances are that during the course of your lifetime, or maybe more so in your 50s and 60s, you’ve known people who’ve said that they wanted to end their lives. Perhaps they were victims of trauma or were dealing with physical and/or psychological challenges. Maybe they were simply crying for help.
Regardless, it’s important to take any
discussion about suicide seriously. There’s also a school of thought which says
that those contemplating suicide do not always give warnings.
When speaking with colleagues who are
psychotherapists, that they’re often surprised to hear about a patient’s
passing. Some have even claimed that they thought another one of their patients
was more likely to take his or her life than the one who actually did.
The Nature and Incidence of Suicide Among Seniors
Suicide is a permanent solution to what might
be a temporary problem. September is National Suicide Prevention Month and a
good time to brush up on the facts about suicide and how to help those who
might be considering it.
According to the American Foundation for Marriage and Family Therapy, while older adults account for 12 percent of the population in the United States, they also account for 18 percent of suicides. And, men are more likely than women to consider taking their lives.
In seniors, or those battling life-threatening
illnesses, there’s something called “silent suicides” where death occurs as a
result of self-starvation, overdosing, or accidents. According to a study
published in the Journal for Family Issues, relationship issues are the most common
reasons for suicide.
In the elderly, in particular, loneliness,
living in isolation, and grieving the loss of loved ones are often causes of
suicide. Another reason in the case of seniors relates to aging,
life-threatening diseases, and the limitations placed on their lives due to reduced
financial and health situations.
Most often there’s a sense of hopelessness and
loss of interest in life. According to many sources, including the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, having major depression can increase the
chance of suicide, so recognizing and treating this condition is very
important. Those who are depressed tend to isolate themselves and focus on
negativity more than the rest of the population.
Suicide Attempts by Seniors
Most suicide attempts are rehearsed or
planned. Seniors are more likely to be successful when trying to take their
lives. In fact, one in four seniors usually succeeds which is higher than those
trying to take their lives during their youth.
If you hear of or notice an attempt, it’s
important to intervene immediately. Some warning signs include insomnia,
nightmares, restlessness, and agitation.
If you observe that your loved one is becoming
more withdrawn, then it might be a good time to find out what’s going on. They
might withdraw because they do not want help but simply want to detach from
loved ones. That is, they just want to die.
The American Foundation of Marriage and Family Therapy claims that at least 40 percent of suicides in the elderly are due to what is known as “secret despair” where they might feel trapped by negative experiences and have a profound sense of hopelessness.
These types of suicides are related to
self-neglect, self-starvation, self-dehydration, and accidents.
After someone dies by means of a suicide, and the
person’s loved ones are questioned afterward, most say that they had no idea of
the person’s intentions. They’re often in shock and riddled with deep feelings of
guilt.
They might find themselves asking if there was
a sign they missed or if there was something they could have done to prevent
this irreversible act.
Impending Suicide: Signs to Watch Out for
While there are not always clues to an
impending suicide, these are behaviors to be cognizant of:
- References to, or jokes about, suicide
- Displaying a sense of despair
- Indicating that there’s no reason to live
- Feeling that he or she is a burden to others
- Being in unbearable physical or psychological pain
- Withdrawal/isolation
- Sleeping too much or too little
- Profound depression
- Anxiety
- Loss of interest in daily activities
- Irritability
- Engaging in risky behaviors
- Giving away or selling personal items
- Reaching out to people to say they love them
- Self-neglect.
What to Do
My grandmother committed suicide when I was 10,
and nobody spoke about it until many decades later. While years ago, suicide
had been a taboo subject, rarely discussed, today the lines of communication are
much more open, and there are many more resources available for those in need.
Here are some immediate things you can do if
you’re worried about those in your life:
- Be
straightforward – ask if they’re thinking about taking
their lives. - Remain in contact
via phone, text, and/or email. - Visit when possible.
- Seek professional
help.
If you or someone you know has talked about suicide, please call:
- The American Foundation of Suicide Prevention hotline at 800 –273-TALK.
- Talk Suicide Canada hotline at 1.833.456.4566.
- Suicide Prevention UK at 0800 689 5652.
- Suicide Prevention Australia at 1300 659 467
If you live in any other country, google “suicide prevention [your country]” for the current number.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
What do you know about senior suicide in the
United States? Has a relative or close friend taken their life? Did they show
any signs that you only recognized in the aftermath of the event? Please share
with our community and let’s have a conversation.