Back in 2018, my second husband passed from this life, and one of my friends asked, “Would you have married again if you knew he would be gone in 6 years?” That is a hard question to answer.

It made me think for just a minute. On some level, I think I realized things might go that way, but I never actually acknowledged it. Would I want to give up these last very happy six years we spent together? No; both of our lives were enriched by our choice to marry again.

A More Difficult Question

About six years ago, another of my good friends and neighbors received the news that her husband had a brain tumor and was not likely to live more than six months.

Three years later, he was still alive, experiencing many good days, although he never had the same good health he enjoyed before his diagnosis.

For the past two months of my husband’s life, my friend and I were on the same path more than once. Both of our husbands were in the same local large hospital at exactly the same time. In addition, we both brought our husbands home with Hospice within a day of one another.

However, after her husband arrived back home, he rallied and said he wasn’t ready to go yet which was wonderful, though it did not last very long.

My husband passed within nine days of being brought home, while her husband’s health went up and down. At times his condition had been very bad, he’d gone back to the hospital and was again with Hospice.

My friend asked me at one point, “Waverly, you’ve been in both places. Which is the hardest: waiting for them to leave this earth or going on after they are gone?” I replied, “Let me think about that. I’m not sure yet.” After a few weeks, I had my answer.

Both are very difficult situations, but once your loved one is in a place where there seems to be no hope of recovery, I think it is easier after they have passed. Then you no longer have to watch them suffer or worry about them and try to anticipate meeting their every need as much as possible.

Still Struggling with My Answer

At this point, my faith is a great source of strength because I do believe that he is no longer suffering and in a much better place. I also believe he is at peace and that I will see him again.

Unfortunately, being in this kind of mental state is way too familiar. But after surviving most parents’ worst fear ­– losing my son at age 24 – and the death of my first husband, I realized I could make a go of life again.

After losing our son, it took me a long time to work through the depression and hopelessness. I had to decide again and again to go on with hope for the future.

Now I have the perspective that I have gone through the worst and coped with God’s help.

Some of My Survival and Coping Techniques

Looking back now, I recognize the different ways I survived.

One of the true stories I read during my time of grief was about a woman who lost all of her children during the civil war due to various causes. She took that experience and started a school for both black and white children together, which was unheard of at that time.

I recall how much that story impacted me and gave me hope that I could survive and go on and accomplish things that mattered in spite of my deep loss.

One memory I have is of going into a beautiful store filled with all kinds of art and beautiful glassware. I remember how it seemed to feed my soul and give me hope that there still would be good things ahead in spite of the great pain in my heart.

When my first husband lost his job, I was forced to take what I had always considered the worst job in the world – Child Protective Services. It felt awful, trying to protect children who appeared to not be valued by their parents, while my heart was breaking over losing my own.

On one of my dark days, I stopped by a paper supply store which just happened to be inviting customers to try out some of their items and showing how to use them.

And wonder of wonders! As I began experimenting, I noticed for the first time in a very long time I was actually having fun. I felt like I was back in kindergarten, enjoying myself. I’d lost that capability along with my son and doing the heavy on-call emergency type of work with children and families.

The paper store experience ended up being very therapeutic for me and has brought me many hours of pleasure since then.

Now my art has branched into jewelry making and is still a great release from dealing with couples, individuals and families going through difficult times.

Satisfaction of Helping Others Go On and Overcome

I have been in private practice for many years now. I’ve also worked with the military, helping service men and women returning from war to reintegrate with their families.

Getting the satisfaction of seeing hundreds of miraculous turnarounds in people’s lives and marriages is very rewarding and fulfilling and keeps me going.

I always say, everyone who lives long enough will go through difficult times. Some people go on with life for a very long time without trauma, while others experience it early in life.

Life can be beautiful again when we live with purpose and faith now and in the future!

Can you relate or has life been pretty smooth so far for you? How have you survived your difficult times? Any suggestions to share with others based on your own pain? Please join the conversation!

Did you know that on average, a person loses between 50 and 100 strands of hair each day? Because we have over 100,000 strands of hair on our heads, we usually don’t even notice our lost hairs. However, if you begin to find more hair than normal in the shower drain or your hairbrush, you may be among the 80 million Americans that experience hair loss, which is medically referred to as alopecia.

While you might think hair loss is an inevitable part of aging, aging is only one of many factors that can impact how much hair you lose. Many are surprised to learn that hormonal changes, nutritional deficiencies, and even medications can all cause hair loss. In fact, one of the side effects of osteoporosis drugs is hair loss.

Thankfully, it is possible to build healthy bones without taking dangerous osteoporosis drugs. In this article, we explain what causes hair loss, how osteoporosis drugs can contribute to it, and provide you with valuable tips for preventing hair loss through a bone-healthy diet.

Our Hair Keeps Us Healthy

Hair plays an important role in our health and wellbeing. It helps us regulate body temperature and protects us from UV rays.

We can see that our hair is always growing, but it might surprise you to learn that the hair we see is already dead. The hair root grows underneath the skin, where the follicles take in nutrients that promote growth. By the time the hair has reached the surface, it is no longer living.

The Four Phases of Hair

It might also surprise you to learn that hair grows faster than almost any other tissue in the body. While the speed may vary from person to person (based on variables mentioned earlier like age, hormones, and access to nutrients), all hair goes through a four-stage life cycle.

The first phase is known as the anagen phase (or growth phase). In this phase, hair is actively growing as the cells in the root of the hair quickly divide. This phase can last two to six years and at any given time, most of the hair on our head is in this phase of growth.

Next comes the shorter (approximately three weeks) catagen phase that signals the end of the growth period where a club hair is formed. This is the hair that is no longer actively growing and is resting (telogen phase) until it eventually falls out during the exogen phase.

What Causes Hair Loss?

While we know there are many variables that impact hair growth, it’s important to understand the biological process that’s causing it. Age is an important factor because as we age, the anagen phase shortens, which is why hair can be more vulnerable to breakage and thinning over time.

If lack of nutrients and sleep are the culprits, it is because the body, under stress, is focused on keeping vital organs functioning and may need to divert resources like oxygen and nutrients away from the hair follicles.

Hormonal changes can contribute to hair loss because decreased estrogen and progesterone levels slow hair growth and cause hair thinning. Drops in estrogen and progesterone also prompt an increase in androgens (often known as “male hormones”), which can actually shrink the hair follicle.

Osteoporosis drugs, to the surprise of many, can cause hair loss by interfering with a crucial biochemical pathway that supports hair growth.

The Link Between Osteoporosis Drugs and Hair Loss

When I was first diagnosed with osteoporosis, I was prescribed the popular bisphosphonate Fosamax. I was shocked to learn that hair loss was one of the many terrible side effects of this drug, and to this day I’m so glad I never took it. Bisphosphonates like Fosamax, Actonel, Boniva, and Reclast have been tied to alopecia.

In a study conducted by a group of Dutch researchers, participants took alendronate (Fosamax) or risedronate (Actonel); the vast majority of alopecia reports (46) came from those taking alendronate.

The researchers noted that the “exact mechanism of bisphosphonate induced alopecia is unknown,” but that it’s most likely because bisphosphonates block a particular enzyme, thereby interfering with an enzymatic pathway.

Bisphosphonates impact bone metabolism by blocking the enzyme farnesyl diphosphate synthase (FPPS) which is involved in the mevalonate pathway (also called the HMG-CoA reductase pathway).” The Osteoporosis Reversal Program, 2007

The mevalonate pathway is essential to the production of cholesterol, which can help explain why bisphosphonates impact hair loss.

Our hair contains cholesterol and the cholesterol in our hair follicles is “partly absorbed and partly synthesized [sic] in hair follicles through the HmG-CoA-reductase pathway.” We know that statins, a popular type of drugs prescribed to lower cholesterol, also disrupt this pathway.

While statins are not prescribed for osteoporosis because they do not bind to bone surface, it is not surprising, given the similar mechanisms of bisphosphonates and statins, that both have a side effect of hair loss.

Stopping Hair Loss Naturally

The good news is that if you have taken osteoporosis drugs before or you are simply experiencing hair loss as part of aging, there are ways for you to naturally stop hair loss AND build bone.

One of the best ways to do this is through diet. The right foods can nourish your hair follicles and promote growth, so next we’ll discuss the foods that have been scientifically shown to promote hair growth.

Acidifying Foods That Promote Hair Growth

Barley

Barley is rich in iron and copper, both of which are needed to produce the red blood cells and hemoglobin that carry oxygen through the body and bring nutrients to the hair follicle.

This is why individuals experiencing anemia, a condition where the body lacks iron, may be losing hair too. Barley also has Vitamin E, which is a powerful antioxidant that protects your skin cells and can repair damage to the scalp.

Eggs

This breakfast staple is a great source of Vitamin B-complex, including biotin. Biotin works with the B-complex to keep the skin hydrated and prevents flaky and irritated skin. Eggs also contain Vitamin D. Studies have shown that women experiencing hair loss typically have lower levels of Vitamin D.

Meat

Zinc deficiency can cause alopecia. That’s why meats like lamb, beef, and turkey, which are all great sources of zinc, are great to incorporate into a hair-healthy diet.

Nuts and Seeds

Many types of nuts, like walnuts, pine nuts, and seeds, are an excellent source of Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids and antioxidants that have been shown to improve hair growth. One study found that Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids, in addition to other vitamins, both prevented hair loss and increased hair thickness.

Salmon

Salmon is an excellent source of many of the elements we have already highlighted, including Omega-3 fatty acids and Vitamin D. Additionally, it is a good source of protein, which is needed to produce keratin, an essential protein in hair.

Alkalizing Foods That Promote Hair Health

Spinach

Like the meat we previously mentioned, spinach is a rich source of iron and folate. Folate helps create the red blood cells that carry oxygen to your hair follicles.

It is also a great source of Vitamin C, which not only helps your body absorb iron but also can help stop hair graying and loss by working against oxidative stress. But the benefits of spinach don’t stop there.

It also contains Vitamin A, which helps grow body tissue and produce an oily, waxy substance that conditions your hair.

Sweet Potatoes

Sweet potatoes contain high levels of beta-carotene, which the body converts to Vitamin A, and as mentioned earlier, will help your body grow cells and tissues, including hair. Other foods that can provide a healthy dose of Vitamin A include carrots, butternut squash, and peppers.

A Note on Diet

The best diet to support bone health is one that maintains a healthy alkaline pH in the body. To do this, it is important to balance the alkalizing and acidifying foods we eat. Our typical western diet is highly acidic. When the pH in the body is too acidic, the body uses calcium from bones to neutralize the acid.

This can negatively affect bone health. Eating approximately 80% alkalizing foods and 20% acidifying ones creates a balanced environment that allows bones to thrive and provides several other health benefits. I recommend keeping track of this balance as you enjoy some of your favorite foods that are great for your bones, and great for your hair.

Healthy Bones Without Any Negative Side Effects

Osteoporosis drugs have a long list of unwanted side effects and hair loss is only one. Thankfully, you don’t need to take osteoporosis drugs to stop bone loss. At the Save Institute, we believe it’s possible to reverse bone loss naturally and avoid the side effects of osteoporosis drugs.

After years of research, we created the Osteoporosis Reversal Program, an all natural, science-based program that reverses and prevents osteoporosis and osteopenia. This program has helped thousands of individuals improve their bone density. It’s great to know you can achieve good hair and good bones without negative side effects.

Have you been diagnosed with osteoporosis or osteopenia? Do you take drugs for these conditions? What side effects are you experiencing? Can you attribute hair loss to these drugs? Have you tried building bone and caring for your hair the natural way? Please share your experience and tips!

Disclaimer: This article is not intended to provide medical advice. Please consult with your doctor to get specific medical advice for your situation.

Selena Gomez is a pretty private person. It’s not like we see her everyday life on TikTok and Instagram. So when she chooses to open up about something, you know it’s important. Gomez revealed today her new mental health campaign for Rare Beauty, her year-old beauty brand. The Mental Health 101 initiative comes right before Mental Health Awareness Month begins in May. It’s part of the brand’s Rare Impact Fund that helps provides access to mental health services and support, especially for underserved communities.

“I wish I learned about mental health the way I learned about other subjects growing up,” said Gomez in a statement. “Every young person deserves to learn about their mental health at a young age so they’re equipped to ask questions, have access to resources, and empower themselves.” She continues on Instagram, saying, “This campaign is so close to my heart because of my own struggles with mental health. I know how scary and lonely it can feel to face anxiety and depression at a young age.”

Source: Instagram

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

You can get involved in the campaign by signing the Change.org petition, advocating for more mental health resources in schools and other educational settings. You can also donate straight to the Rare Impact Fund. Rare Beauty will be matching donations up to $200,000. According to Inside Philanthropy, only 1.3 percent of overall philanthropic investments went to support mental health in recent years. That’s what makes initiatives like this one so important.

And as always, you can pick up some Rare Beauty products to upgrade your spring makeup look. (Rare Beauty has pledged 100 million dollars over the next 10 years to this mental health initiative.) May we recommend the Soft Pinch Liquid Blush ($20 at Sephora) and the Discovery Eyeshadow Palette ($29 at Sephora)? You won’t be sorry.

Plopping has been around forever but the curly hair hack has become even more popular as of late thanks to TikTok. Even those with only slight waves are plopping their hair to achieve their best, frizz-free curls. Since plopping involves using a T-shirt in place of a towel and you might not have one around you want to get dirty, Sun Bum created a T-shirt Hair Towel in collaboration with Daniella Perkins. This is the tee you’ll always use and have around.

There are a lot of ways you could be familiar with actress Daniella Perkins. The 20 year old starred in the Nickelodeon series Knight Squad, as well as guest spots in Girl Meets World and Legendary Dudas. And if you haven’t seen any of those shows, there’s a good chance she’s popped up on your TikTok For You Page considering she has a whopping 2.3 million followers. Here she shows off her cute style, beauty faves and curl routine. She’s the perfect partner for Sun Bum’s curl collection.

Source: Instagram

Though, it hasn’t always been easy breesy. “My curl journey has been a long one and I’m still on it! You’re always learning with curly hair,” Perkins tells STYLECASTER. “It went from healthy to damaged to a little bit healthy back to damaged and now it’s on its road to recovery for the past two years.” She admits that she hasn’t always loved her natural texture.

“I didn’t always love my curls. I wanted to be one of those girls with pretty wavy hair that you can put up in a ponytail and take out whenever you want…brush it whenever you want to,” she says. “When I was about 14, I would literally go in the shower [and] spend two hours curling my hair with my finger, and as soon as I got out of the shower would take a straightener and put it to my wet hair so I could get that ‘wavy look.’ It never worked.”

Source: Instagram

She admits it’s all a bit of a bummer. “An ex of mine would always say ‘Oh, I wish you had straight hair so I can run my fingers through your hair,’ or people always want to touch it and act like it’s some crazy thing to have,” she says. “But I realize my curls are beautiful and I shouldn’t try to change my hair texture for anyone. It’s hard finding your perfect hair routine, but once you do, loving your curls becomes a little easier. I never want any little girl to feel like her hair isn’t beautiful. Because it is beautiful.”

Sum Bum.

Sum Bum.

Perkins says one of the reasons she had trouble embracing her hair was because of the lack of representation in media. “I never saw anyone whose skin color or hair looked like me on TV,” she says. “When I was 10, I wanted to be Hannah Montana so badly. I went to the Disney store and my aunt bought me a blonde wig. I lived in that wig. I wanted to have straight blonde hair for so long.” Luckily, there are a few things that can help you love your curls. One is really nailing that routine.

“It takes a minute but once you understand your curls, you can become a master at it,” she says. “To help with frizz, I have been loving the Sun Bum T-shirt Hair Towel for drying. To get the bounce once my hair is dry enough for me, I flip my head over and I take a toothpick comb and just go to the places where my hair kind of sinks down a little bit.”

Sun Bum.

This “towel” is actually a cute T-shirt you can wear and then use to wrap your hair sans frizz. It’s all part of the curly girl routine. The super-soft, absorbent cotton will cut down drying time and keep hair smooth.

Sun Bum.

Meeting Zendaya helped Perkins be more confident and even inspired her future roles. “The first thing [Zendaya] told me was, ‘Don’t ever let them touch your hair. Protect your curls,’” she says. “That stuck with me. That’s why when I booked Knight Squad my curly hair was a big part of that character.” She’s gotten incredible feedback from young fans and their mothers about her character’s natural hair.

“I actually had the most touching experience at a Nickelodeon meet greet,” she says. “This little girl saw me and started crying her heart out. She told me she was so happy that she saw someone who looked like her on Nickelodeon. That shows you the lack of representation. I’m so glad things are changing. We’re definitely nowhere near where we should be, but we’re getting there.”

Good grief! Was that really me in the mirror? A year of pandemic neglect had created an urgent need for a makeover!

Like most of us, I spent a year isolated indoors. At high risk for the coronavirus, I took every precaution, determined to stay alive and enjoy more good years. Over time, I learned to rely on all forms of screens – TV, social media, binging on Netflix, facetiming children and grandchildren, and continuing my meetings and classes on Zoom. Thank God for Zoom!

I am fortunate enough to have a supportive family who did my grocery shopping and errands. Except for occasional drives to save my sanity and drive-up windows at the bank and drug store, I rarely ventured out. I passed on doctor’s appointments unless they were urgent.

The past year I got really comfortable – and I mean, REALLY comfortable! I lived in sweats and pajamas and dressed from the waist up only for my Zoom meetings. I didn’t bother with haircuts – just pulled it back into a ponytail. Why spend the money? Who saw me, anyway? And I never, ever put on makeup. (You’ll be pleased to know, however, that I continued to shower and brush my teeth.)

My budget benefited from not buying any new clothes. I didn’t need them. And I didn’t even put on the ones I had because they didn’t expand with my newly expanding body like the sweats and leggings did.

About that expanding body! Yes, like many, the ice cream and other comfort foods I was indulging in added to the lack of physical activity; played havoc. I have paid a price.

So, where has this brought me? It’s spring, the weather here is beautiful many days, I’m vaccinated and beginning to feel cautiously liberated. The flowers are blooming, and I need to bloom also!

I’ve put together an action plan. I call it “Bloomin’ Rosy” (my name is Rosemary). You might like to try it also. It’s a bit self-indulgent and requires spending some money on yourself, but we’re so worth it!

The 8-Step “Bloomin’ Rosy” Action Plan

#1: Hair Salon

Starting with something like “lose 10 pounds” is self-defeating. So, I started with a haircut. Going to the salon was a bit scary. No seats for waiting, arrive on time, only one patron per operator in the place at a time, everyone masked, temperature taken upon arrival and sanitizer offered for hands, immediately taken to shampoo station.

But after a while I got used to it, and when I left, I felt like a million bucks! Such an improvement! The only place I was going thereafter was to the drugstore, but I looked good and felt good. I like my salt-and-pepper color and have no desire to color my hair as I head to all gray, but I’m considering adding some silver highlights next time, to brighten it up a bit.

#2: Getting Waxed

This is a bit delicate to discuss, but pre-pandemic I made regular visits to the waxing salon to get those nasty chin hairs that seem to appear as we get older removed. During the pandemic, why bother? I tweezed as best I could and who saw the ones I missed behind my mask anyway?

So, #2, a visit to the waxing salon. That one was really scary because you can’t wear a mask when someone is waxing your chin and those little rooms have no windows. But the sign on the door said, “Walk in, dance out,” and that’s exactly what I did! Got the eyebrows done, too.

#3: The Mani-Pedi

How glorious is that? I picked a sunny pink color to go with the season and my mood and they removed all the cuticle, the callouses, and the hangnails that had been neglected, slathered me up with cream and hot towels, and left me with gorgeous hands and feet. Now I was really dancing out the door! Except those darn flip-flops slow me down. But, hey, we can handle this.

#4: A Massage and the Chiropractor

All this dancing out of doors was making me ache, not to mention a year of sitting in a chair in front of screens. The chiropractor said he’s never been busier. Everyone, even kids who were doing virtual classes on their phones sitting in bed, developed back issues.

I needed my facial expression to go with the rosy pink season and my nails. After those sessions, the pained expression was gone.

#5: The Dentist

Normally, I’m scrupulous about dental care, but being maskless in a closed room with a dentist and a hygienist hovering over my face was not something I was willing to do during the height of the pandemic, so dental hygiene was neglected.

Yes, this is a health thing, not usually regarded as a makeover item, but getting your teeth cleaned and maybe whitened, lets your smile match those sunny pink fingers and toes.

#6: The Dermatologist

OK, to be honest, I haven’t done this, but I am seriously considering it and you might want to consider it also. I feel like my face needs a little rejuvenating. Perhaps a dermabrasion. That would really produce some pink!

Or maybe some filler to plump up my marionette lines and remove the downward, sad expression? There’s a certain amount of courage required here, as well as cash, but I’m at least going to make an appointment for a consultation.

#7: And of Course, the Diet

I’m not looking at this as a deprivation diet but rather as a return to healthy eating. I ventured into a super-duper-giant-supermarket and did my own grocery shopping for the first time in a year. I got to browse the produce and select beautiful fresh vegetables and fruit.

I’m cooking simple meals, and weather permitting, enjoying them outside on the patio. I cook what I like, and I’m savoring each bite. And I feel healthier with each one. This, combined with some gardening and walks, will get those extra pounds off in short order in a relaxing and enjoyable way.

#8: Last but Not Least, Clothes and Shoes!

I haven’t bought clothes in over a year. I mean real clothes, not the sweats, leggings and pajamas. I deserve this. Theaters and restaurants are very gradually starting to open up, my friends are beginning to venture out, I’ve made a reservation for a small vacation – yes, a new outfit is in order.

I’m a big fan of Eileen Fisher, love her fabrics and earthy, neutral colors like stone and seaweed and terracotta and casual style. I indulged in two nice mix-and-match outfits that I love, and guess what, I spent some money on me and I deserve it!

I also bought some sandals. Yes, the weather will soon be warm enough to wear them, and I want to show off my sunny pink toes!

Feel free to modify according to your own needs and lifestyle, but I can’t stress enough how good this feels!

What beauty regimens have you neglected during the pandemic that you’d like to get back to you? What would your action plan look like?