Amanda Batula’s Shiny Blue Puffer Coat on Winter House

Winter House Season 1 Episode 2 Fashion

On last night’s episode of Winter House Amanda Batula chose to watch Luke build an igloo over having a ski lesson with Andrea. And although we can only hope we’re ever lucky enough to be placed in that kind of predicament, right now it’s time for us to choose a Style Stealer to buy of her shiny blue puffer coat. 

Fashionably,

Faryn

Click Here to See Her ASOS 4505 Coat

Click Here to Shop Her UGG Boots in Chestnut or Black

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Originally posted at: Amanda Batula’s Shiny Blue Puffer Coat

Many divorced women over 50 struggle to move on because they are still plagued by feelings of guilt, selfishness, and that they “don’t deserve it.” 

Whether it’s the messaging you received throughout your marriage – that your role as a wife and mother was all that mattered, or narratives you’ve been carrying from childhood, such as good girls don’t ask for more and that they should just be happy for what they have – that programming doesn’t go away. 

It won’t magically disappear just because you’re divorced. 

Or when you retire from work.

And it certainly won’t go away if you don’t do anything about it. 

So if you want to learn the 3 mind-blowing mindset shifts that will let you put yourself first after 50 (without feeling guilty), then continue reading!

Where Does the Guilt Come From?

The guilt you feel when you put yourself first after 50 is from a narrative that wants to keep you miserable and unsure of yourself. 

Whenever you try to buy something for yourself after divorce, like a new pair of shoes or a new car, do you have that nagging voice in your head that says, “It’s too expensive! You don’t deserve something this nice! Go to the clearance rack!” 

You’re not crazy if you struggle with those voices. In fact, many divorced women over 50 do. They come from patriarchal narratives that would keep women questioning themselves and their worth. 

Especially after divorce and at midlife. 

But We’re Not Going to Do That Anymore at 50 and Beyond

So when you feel guilty or that nagging voice in your head says stuff like, “you should just be happy with what you have,” you have permission to tell that voice to shut up.

You are not guilty or selfish for putting yourself first. It’s the only thing that will get you unstuck after your divorce. 

Mind-Blowing Mindset Shift 1: I am a strong warrior goddess. The *only way* to heal and move forward is to take care of myself.

Putting Yourself First After Divorce = Taking Your Power Back 

The feelings of guilt and selfishness from divorce at 50 are mechanisms that are attempting to take your power away from you. 

These negative feelings – the ones that tell you that you shouldn’t “spend money on yourself when there are charities to give it to or children who could use it” are the agents of abusive power that are trying to keep you silent, scared, and stuck. 

But when you put yourself first – when you decide to go on the weekend solo trip instead of spending another stressful holiday with your family, or when you turn off your cell phone so you can have some time to yourself, or when you say “no” to a project that you know will drain you – you are the person in charge. 

When you stand up for yourself and prioritize what you want at 50, instead of trying so hard to please everybody else – your confidence starts to solidify. 

You quit doubting yourself. 

You become more resistant to the triggering questions and judgement that others have been able to control you with for years. 

Those skills build back your right to self-determination, independence, and agency over your own mind and body that years of people-pleasing, shame, toxic cultural messaging, unhealthy family dynamics, and patriarchy started stealing from you when you were young. 

It is those skills that will give you the motivation to get out of your current rut – the one you’re frustrated with since the divorce ended. The one that has you wondering, “now what?!” 

The “now what?!” is to prioritize your happiness and what you need at 50.

“What now?!” should turn into “What is good for me?” – something you may have never done in your life. 

But now is the time to start. 

Mind-Blowing Mindset Shift #2: Putting myself first is a source of pride, not guilt. When I take my power back, I set the example for the girls and women after me that they too are worthy. Just like I am worthy. 

You deserve to be empowered and to let your voice be heard. At 50, at 60, at 70, and beyond.

Nobody Is Here to Save You 

The forces that have made you question yourself and make you feel bad about yourself over the decades – whether it was the sense of shame from your family, or the religion you were raised in, or if your ex-husband was a jerk – are not going to reward you for all the sacrifices you made. 

None of those factors that contributed to you feeling guilty and bad about yourself over the years are going to see the light and apologize for the hurt and gaslighting they did to you. 

And if it was up to those factors that made you feel guilty, they’d love to maintain the status quo which has you questioning your worth as a divorced woman over 50.

It’s time for you to quit relying on others to give you the green light to start investing in yourself. Because guess what, my sweet, beautiful soul? No one is going to give you a reward for your hard work. 

No one is going to reward you for being the martyr.

Mind-Blowing Mindset Shift 3: I do not rely on external factors to reward me. I focus on myself. The time to invest in myself is now. 

So quit waiting around. The time to focus on yourself is now. 

So how about you? Do you struggle with putting yourself first? What actions will you start taking to prioritize yourself after divorce? 

For the past few days, I’ve been getting compliments on my skin and I couldn’t figure out what I was doing differently. Is it that I finally got rid of an epic breakout? Is it my new moisturizer for cooler weather? Then it hit me. I had been wearing Tower 28’s SunnyDays Tinted Sunscreen Foundation for a few weeks. I was really liking the formula and the coverage but I didn’t realize others had noticed, too.

I started drilling my friends, asking them why I looked better in their eyes. (It’s both fun and annoying to be BFFs with a beauty editor.) What I heard most often was that my skin looked glowy and even but not too covered-up — you could still see my freckles. That’s how I knew I had found my new favorite foundation.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

Tower 28.

I was trying out the foundation before it launched and boy, am I glad I did. When it finally came out earlier this month, it had a 2,500+ person waitlist according to the brand. But why were folks so excited before they even tried it? Well, for a few reasons. First, it’s tough to find a mineral sunscreen that doesn’t leave a whitecast. And to find a tinted one with 14 shades with no whitecast? Almost impossible. But Tower 28 was able to do it.

SunnyDays is also sensitive skin-approved. So much so that it’s the first and only complexion makeup product with the National Eczema Association’s Seal of Acceptance. So, if you worry sunscreen will break you out, cause a rash or inflame a condition like eczema, you don’t have to worry about that here.

Source: Instagram

The non-nano zinc formula is reef-safe, alcohol-free, fragrance-free, and contains skincare-like ingredients such as prickly pear extract, aloe vera and white sage sourced from California deserts. And let’s talk about that shade range! Fourteen flexible shades is a great amount for a tinted sunscreen. The brand worked with celebrity makeup artist Kirin Bhatty to nail the shades and undertones so everyone can find their unique hue. Plus, they have really cute names. They’re all named after places in Los Angeles (where Tower 28 is based), as a nod to some of the founder Amy Liu’s favorite local hang-outs. I’m wearing Larchmont.

Considering there was such a massive waitlist, Tower 28 did a good job continuing to stock SunnyDays. You can still pick it up now — at least until it goes viral on TikTok.

For the past few days, I’ve been getting compliments on my skin and I couldn’t figure out what I was doing differently. Is it that I finally got rid of an epic breakout? Is it my new moisturizer for cooler weather? Then it hit me. I had been wearing Tower 28’s SunnyDays Tinted Sunscreen Foundation for a few weeks. I was really liking the formula and the coverage but I didn’t realize others had noticed, too.

I started drilling my friends, asking them why I looked better in their eyes. (It’s both fun and annoying to be BFFs with a beauty editor.) What I heard most often was that my skin looked glowy and even but not too covered-up — you could still see my freckles. That’s how I knew I had found my new favorite foundation.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

Tower 28.

I was trying out the foundation before it launched and boy, am I glad I did. When it finally came out earlier this month, it had a 2,500+ person waitlist according to the brand. But why were folks so excited before they even tried it? Well, for a few reasons. First, it’s tough to find a mineral sunscreen that doesn’t leave a whitecast. And to find a tinted one with 14 shades with no whitecast? Almost impossible. But Tower 28 was able to do it.

SunnyDays is also sensitive skin-approved. So much so that it’s the first and only complexion makeup product with the National Eczema Association’s Seal of Acceptance. So, if you worry sunscreen will break you out, cause a rash or inflame a condition like eczema, you don’t have to worry about that here.

Source: Instagram

The non-nano zinc formula is reef-safe, alcohol-free, fragrance-free, and contains skincare-like ingredients such as prickly pear extract, aloe vera and white sage sourced from California deserts. And let’s talk about that shade range! Fourteen flexible shades is a great amount for a tinted sunscreen. The brand worked with celebrity makeup artist Kirin Bhatty to nail the shades and undertones so everyone can find their unique hue. Plus, they have really cute names. They’re all named after places in Los Angeles (where Tower 28 is based), as a nod to some of the founder Amy Liu’s favorite local hang-outs. I’m wearing Larchmont.

Considering there was such a massive waitlist, Tower 28 did a good job continuing to stock SunnyDays. You can still pick it up now — at least until it goes viral on TikTok.

For the past few days, I’ve been getting compliments on my skin and I couldn’t figure out what I was doing differently. Is it that I finally got rid of an epic breakout? Is it my new moisturizer for cooler weather? Then it hit me. I had been wearing Tower 28’s SunnyDays Tinted Sunscreen Foundation for a few weeks. I was really liking the formula and the coverage but I didn’t realize others had noticed, too.

I started drilling my friends, asking them why I looked better in their eyes. (It’s both fun and annoying to be BFFs with a beauty editor.) What I heard most often was that my skin looked glowy and even but not too covered-up — you could still see my freckles. That’s how I knew I had found my new favorite foundation.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

Tower 28.

I was trying out the foundation before it launched and boy, am I glad I did. When it finally came out earlier this month, it had a 2,500+ person waitlist according to the brand. But why were folks so excited before they even tried it? Well, for a few reasons. First, it’s tough to find a mineral sunscreen that doesn’t leave a whitecast. And to find a tinted one with 14 shades with no whitecast? Almost impossible. But Tower 28 was able to do it.

SunnyDays is also sensitive skin-approved. So much so that it’s the first and only complexion makeup product with the National Eczema Association’s Seal of Acceptance. So, if you worry sunscreen will break you out, cause a rash or inflame a condition like eczema, you don’t have to worry about that here.

Source: Instagram

The non-nano zinc formula is reef-safe, alcohol-free, fragrance-free, and contains skincare-like ingredients such as prickly pear extract, aloe vera and white sage sourced from California deserts. And let’s talk about that shade range! Fourteen flexible shades is a great amount for a tinted sunscreen. The brand worked with celebrity makeup artist Kirin Bhatty to nail the shades and undertones so everyone can find their unique hue. Plus, they have really cute names. They’re all named after places in Los Angeles (where Tower 28 is based), as a nod to some of the founder Amy Liu’s favorite local hang-outs. I’m wearing Larchmont.

Considering there was such a massive waitlist, Tower 28 did a good job continuing to stock SunnyDays. You can still pick it up now — at least until it goes viral on TikTok.