There’s no doubt about it – the way we communicate has drastically changed over the past year with more and more people using smartphones. Texting, message apps or instant messages (IM) with emoji’s, LOL’s, FWIW’s and OMG’s are now mainstream methods of communication.

Text Messaging or Messaging Apps

All smartphones come preloaded with a messaging app that allows you to send and receive texts. These text messages are billed by your provider against your cellular phone plan. Many providers offer varying amounts of texting packages – 150, 250, 500 or unlimited.

Another way to communicate with people is by using a third-party messaging app that is downloaded from the Google Play Store or Apple’s App Store. These apps use your data plan or Wi-Fi and do not count against the texting limits of your phone bill.

Messaging apps are especially useful for folks that are communicating across international borders because there are no charges associated with using the apps to message, video chat or send photos/videos if you are on Wi-Fi.

Just like with cars, messaging apps all work on similar principles and have a lot of overlap, but there are some differences that might make one app more appealing to use than another. Regardless, you have the ability and freedom to use one, or more than one of these apps, at the same time.

The common features of messaging apps are:

• They work on Wi-Fi or cellular data if no Wi-Fi is available.
• They are not specific to a software system – most work on Android, iOS and Windows smartphones and usually have companion apps for desktop use.
• They not only offer messaging, but voice and video calls also.
• Messaging apps allow you to send photos, audio and video attachments.
• They contain security features that encrypt your conversations for privacy.
• If you turn on the notifications within the app settings, you will get alerts each time you receive a new message, just like your default text messaging app.

Using Multiple Message Apps

If you choose to use a different app than the one that came with your phone, or a variety of messaging apps specific to certain family, friends or business contacts, you should know that they all have the same setup process.

You have to create an account based on your mobile phone number, verify with a text, and then allow the app to share your Contacts so that it works with the information in your device.

You will want to setup notifications and maybe change sounds so that they match the app. This will allow you to distinguish the difference when new messages arrive.

One of the advantages of using a third-party messaging app is that you can communicate with anyone, from any device, as long as you download the app on your various devices. No longer will you miss the message if your phone is not in your hand.

Below is an overview of a few of the popular options available and some of the differences between them.

Facebook Messenger

The Facebook Messenger app allows you to communicate privately with your friends in real-time, whether or not they are on Facebook. It is a separate app that must be installed on your phone or tablet, although it syncs with your Facebook account and contacts.

Unlike the other things you share on Facebook, such as status updates or photos, chats and messages will not be shared with all of your friends or posted on your Timeline. Also, a Facebook account is not required to use Messenger.

However, unlike many of the other apps below, Messenger does not encrypt messages and offers minimal security. Facebook Messenger lets you text message, audio and video chat, and send photos and videos.

WhatsApp

WhatsApp is one of the first messaging apps to come to market. Back when SMS, or texting, was expensive and had limits based on your plan, they cornered the market and now, with more than a billion daily active users, it is one of the most popular mobile social apps in the world.

Acquired by Facebook in 2014, the app lets anyone send unlimited texts, photos, audio, and videos to their friends, freely and securely. Users can also make free video calls.

Among the features that make this a great choice is the group chat, the ability to send pictures and videos, free calling (even internationally) and the ability to share your location.

It doesn’t have some of the advanced features of the newer competitors, but it is a fast and easy-to-use app that doesn’t feel overwhelming.

To keep your account as secure as possible, WhatsApp uses end-to-end encryption so all messages can only be viewed by the sender and the recipient.

In addition, it uses two-factor authentication so the user must enter a second password or code to gain access to the app. There is also a desktop application now for WhatsApp, so that you can use it if your phone isn’t nearby.

WhatsApp is a great app for families that are dispersed across the world. You can create one chat where all family members can communicate with each other.

Viber

Viber is a fully encrypted texting app that has applications for your smartphone, tablet and computer.

One differentiator with Viber is that it allows public accounts, which are usually set up by brands or celebrities, to engage with an audience. Typically, they are streams of updates that can be ‘liked,’ similar to social media networks such as Twitter.

Viber also provides a service called Viber Out, a VoIP feature that allows worldwide calls for a low rate if you aren’t using Wi-Fi. You can purchase minutes via a credit card or PayPal, and you can call anyone, even if they don’t use Viber, similar to Skype.

When it comes to security, Viber is fully encrypted. Moreover, it also allows you to delete messages you have already sent, use ‘hidden chats’ that don’t show up in a chat list and can be accessed only with a PIN, and use self-destructing messages.

Telegram

Telegram is a cloud-based messaging service that touts itself to be, “the fastest and most secure mass-market messaging system in the world.”

Telegram’s Secret Chat feature allows the user to program messages to delete automatically from both devices after two seconds or up to one week.

According to Telegram, Secret Chats offer end-to-end encryption and leave no trace on the company’s servers, thus ensuring the message can only be read by the intended recipient.

Telegram has a large audience for folks focused on security and privacy, in particular for sending sensitive documents, photos, password information, trade secrets, etc. They were the first to offer this level of security and privacy, and other apps have since jumped on board to offer end-to-end encryption.

In January 2021, Telegram surpassed 500 million monthly active users. It was the most downloaded app worldwide.

— Wikipedia

WeChat

First introduced in China in 2011, as of August 2017 WeChat had the largest number of monthly users, almost 1 billion. WeChat has been a pioneer of development within the app, making it “China’s app for everything.”

It can be used for shopping, exchanging money, playing games, paying utility bills, buying movie tickets, booking travel and many other daily life activities. Most of these features are available only in China and as such, are the envy of those outside that community.

Voxer

Remember the days of walkie-talkies? They were kind of the beginning of messaging on-the-go. Technology has changed a lot, to say the least. One messaging app has brought back the walkie-talkie feel. Voxer is an app you can use on your smartphone, tablet, or computer. It’s push-to-talk feature can create live conversations (Roger that! 10-4!) or save for play back (like voice mail).

Businesses have recently turned to Voxer as the app supports large groups to communicate easily.

With all of these options, how do you know which one is right for you? Ask family and friends which apps they are using to communicate. It will be easier to jump into an app that the people you want to communicate with are already using.

Keep in mind that you are not limited to just one of these apps, you can use several apps for messaging at the same time.

BTW, whether you are using the native texting app or one of these messaging third-party apps, the lingo can be confusing (IKR!). If you need help deciphering your text messages, check out this list of the most commonly used abbreviations and acronyms. TYVM.

Do you use messaging as one of your main forms of communication? If so, which app, or apps, do you use? Are you afraid to download and play with options? Please share your thoughts below!

Rosalynn Carter said it first, and I think said it best: “There are only four kinds of people in the world: those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers.” Which category do you or perhaps will you be likely to fall into? Do you know anyone who is currently a caregiver?

Caregiver Stress

Whether you have already had direct experience or know a friend or family member who has, you likely understand how stressful that role can be. In addition to physical and emotional stress, a caregiver also often has to deal with financial stress as well. All of those stressors contribute to this shocking statistic – up to 60% of caregivers will pass away before the one they are providing care for!

Caregiver Health

Whether we are talking about caregiving for a spouse, parent, or other family member/friend, the stress level can be very significant and often continue over a prolonged period of time. Stress produces what I call “negative, slowly killing you” chemicals in your body, like cortisol.

Cortisol is important for our bodies to function normally but too much can be bad for our health. It can increase heart rate, elevate blood pressure, trigger weight gain or lead to diabetes or other health problems.

Caregiver Tendency

The bottom line is that caregivers need to intentionally seek ways to reduce their physical, emotional, and financial stress in order to maintain their own health. My mother was a caregiver for my father, and I’ve known many women who were caregivers at some point in their lives.

It’s often difficult for them to see or commit to taking the time to accept help in various areas that can help to reduce their stress. They put caregiving for themselves on the back burner.

Caregiver Zoom

Recently, I was invited by a nonprofit agency to speak to a caregiver support group virtually about the financial side of caregiving. These days, when free workshops are offered online, it’s very common to get lots of sign-ups but very few actually attend.

This workshop, however, had 85% attendance of those that had registered. It’s often difficult for caregivers to get out of the house, so a virtual option has been a blessing. All of the attendees were women, and one woman had her husband, who she provides care for, sit in on the meeting with her (off-camera) so they could learn together.

Caregiver Finance

Because of my experience with family and clients, I continue to offer workshops for women who are single, who may be caregivers, or who are helping aging parents. There is a lot of detail in the financial arena that we often have not been taught about along the way.

Financial Stress

I share three steps that I have found to be extremely helpful in minimizing financial stress for women, especially in a caregiving situation. My mother and several clients are living proof that these tasks can significantly reduce the stress of an already difficult situation.

Step 1: Take Financial Inventory

First, you cannot utilize your financial resources or make wise money decisions until you have a good handle on what you have. I call that a financial inventory. The tool you use to compile that information is a net worth statement (I designed a very detailed net worth pdf that does the math for you!).

You can avoid one of the most common estate planning mistakes, not having a list of assets, by compiling an “I Own, I Owe” list (aka net worth statement) to use right now.

Step 2: Complete Estate Planning Documents

Second, make sure you have estate planning documents in place and that they reflect your current wishes and same for the one you are caring for. One of caregivers’ biggest worries is “what happens if I am gone first?”

At a minimum, all parties involved should include a will and/or trust, Durable (Financial) Power of Attorney, Health Care Power of Attorney, (and Mental Health Care Power of Attorney in some states) and Living Will.

If your documents are more than 3-5 years old, and you do not see any changes that need to be made, it is still prudent to call your estate planning attorney to see if there have been any law changes that may require updated wording in the documents.

Step 3: Confirm Desired Asset Allocation

Last, go back to your net worth statement and look closely at the details. You may have some homework to do. Check out one of my past blogs to confirm if you have told your assets where to go.

What I mean by that is first, does the title of each non-retirement account/property say where that account goes after you or a loved one passes? To accomplish that, the account/property could be titled in the name of your trust, be titled as joint with rights of survivorship, or include a POD (Payable on Death, at the bank) or TOD (Transfer on Death, at the investment institution/property deed) designation.

And secondly, do you have primary as well as contingent beneficiaries listed on your retirement, annuity, or life insurance accounts? Use your net worth statement as the checklist to confirm account/property titles and beneficiary designations are currently reflecting your wishes.

Avoiding Probate

Remember, account titling and beneficiary designations act as a mini-will on each account to tell the custodian (i.e., the bank or investment firm) where the account goes after you are no longer alive.

If there is no beneficiary/survivor listed on the account/property, then the will/trust will dictate where it goes, BUT it must go through probate first in order to get distributed by the will/trust. And probate is a court process that will have a cost and a delay associated with it.

The financial side of life can be stressful for many, with or without caregiving as part of the picture. Why not get your financial house in order now with these three steps as another way to help maintain your health no matter which of Rosalynn Carter’s categories you fall into?

Have you had any experience with caregiving that could be helpful to share with others? What do you wish you would’ve known that you encourage other women to be aware of? Let’s have a discussion!

Garcelle Beauvais’ Leopard Print Pajama Set in Del Mar

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 11 Episode 19 Fashion

Garcelle Beauvais knows how to do mornings in her leopard print pajama set. If I close my eyes and picture a classy and comfortable morning look it would be this picture of Garcelle that I see. Including the gossip over coffee with a friend (only I would check my surroundings first). And if you check your surroundings you’ll find that below there is an eavesdropper great Style Stealers of Garcelle’s PJ’s.

Sincerely Stylish,

Jess

Click Here to See Her Equipment Pajamas

Click Here to Read About Her Cardigan + Sunglasses

Originally posted at: Garcelle Beauvais’ Leopard Print Pajama Set

I work and speak with many women over 50 who are looking to redefine in some way. I’ve met women who have relocated to other countries and didn’t even know the language. Women who have written books and started businesses. Women who have found love. One of the women in my community adopted two infants and a toddler in her very early 50s!

Each of these women could not be more different. Yet, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM, when we talked about barriers, described imposter syndrome as being one.

What Is Imposter Syndrome?

When we get excited about something new that we want to try – whether it be taking a class, learning a new hobby, starting a business, or retiring – imposter syndrome is that voice in our head that says to us: “Who do you think you are? You don’t know the first thing about ___________. What makes you think you can do that?”

Unfortunately, imposter syndrome can occur not only in our heads but also externally, as well meaning friends and family ask us the same questions. This does nothing but validate our own negative thoughts.

I interviewed Lisa – a stay-at-home mom who decided after 50 to up and move to Italy from her home in Salt Lake City, Utah. She was back and forth in her own mind between sheer excitement and butterflies in her stomach over this move to the terror of “What do I think I’m doing? I don’t even speak the language!”

Lisa had no shortage of friends who, when she told them what she was planning to do, said, “Wait… do you speak Italian?” or “Wait… you’re leaving your kids (who, by the way were independent adults) and everyone you know to go somewhere where you don’t know ANYONE??”

In spite of all that, Lisa pushed forward, moved to Italy and said, “For the first time in a long time I had joy.”

I’ve spoken with women from all walks of life who have redefined in some way. Women who have been stay-at-home moms to women who had high up corporate positions. Every single one of them describes experiencing imposter syndrome each time they decided to try something new and different.

And each one described being faced with imposter syndrome type questions and opinions coming from those around them.

Why Do We Experience It?

We, as humans, are wired to resist and even fear change. There is a part of our brain called the amygdala which interprets change as an actual threat. Imposter syndrome is one of the many ways our brain protects us from diverting from the comfortable and safe routine.  

How many of us have said, “The evil we know is better than the evil we don’t”?

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

It’s Just a Thought

Most importantly, understand that it’s just a thought, and that it’s your brain trying to keep you safe and in the status quo.

I jokingly thank my brain for taking good care of me, push my anxiety aside, and move forward.

Formulating some goal specific affirmations to say and journaling every day is a helpful trick. This will start to replace the stories that your brain is hearing and giving back to you. Some examples might be:

• “I am a woman who flips her hair and moves forward with her goals and plans every day;”
• “I deserve to live the life that I want to live every day;”
• “I am a healthy, active woman every day;”
• “I am learning and growing every day.”

Visualize Yourself Doing the Thing That You Want to Be Doing

Find a quiet spot and really visualize. Where are you? What are you wearing? What are you doing? What do you see around you?

Get so excited about it that the thought of not doing it would be too disappointing to even fathom.

Surround Yourself with Others Who Share Similar Goals and Aspirations

There has never been an easier time to do this than now. Find a community of women who want to do the thing that you want to do, either online or in person. This community will provide you with:

• Motivation and encouragement when that “imposter voice” rears its ugly head;
• Validation – that the change you are making is a positive one when many in your life might be hinting or outright telling you otherwise;
• Resources – Sixty and Me is a community that can provide you with resources and tools that will help you on your journey.

Lastly, Ask Yourself This Question

What will happen if I never take action on this thing that I’m really excited about doing?

Imposter syndrome is a universal, natural, and automatic reaction to us doing anything outside of the status quo. Knowing that and understanding that can help you to overcome it, move forward, and continue to learn and grow as much as you want to regardless of your age or background.

Are you thinking of redefining in some way? Have you experienced imposter syndrome? Have you had to handle those imposter syndrome type questions from friends and family? Did it cause you to rethink your plans or goals?

Garcelle Beauvais’ Black and White Kimono

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 11 Episode 19 Fashion

When given the choice of watching friends do some pool yoga or actually doing it myself on vacation, I am definitely on the same page as Garcelle Beauvais and Sutton Stracke. I’d rather be an onlooker than a participant in most physical activity that doesn’t involved raising a glass to my mouth—repeatedly. Though I think clicking “Add to Cart” and having Garcelle’s black and white kimono delivered to my hotel would fit in quite nicely with my itinerary.

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Click Here to Shop her Free People Kimono

Originally posted at: Garcelle Beauvais’ Black and White Kimono