We’re
all storytellers. Was there a time years ago when you did a lot of writing or dreamed
about being a writer? Perhaps people have told you that you should write a
book.

Maybe
you want to share a family story or secret. But perhaps for one reason or
another, you’ve been silenced and were never able to express yourself. Well, now
might be the time to crack open your journal and begin writing.

Why Write Personal Stories?

Writing
your life story, including all its inherent joys and tribulations, can be a
satisfying way to preserve your legacy and also help you heal from painful memories.

The
fact is, experiences that wound us can injure us in body, mind, and in
voice. The act of writing about your experiences can help reclaim that silenced
voice. Finding your voice as a way to healing can lead to huge leaps in
transformation.

Speaking Your Truth

Each person has his or her own truth. You
can only write your truth. When writing about your experiences, it’s not
so much about what happened to you, but how an experience has affected
you and the person you’ve become as a result.

Speaking your truth is not only healthy but
can also be quite liberating, emotionally. In the end, the rewards for speaking
and writing your truth will be great. But be mindful of the fact that sometimes
what is not said can be more powerful than what is actually stated.

One thing to keep in mind when writing is
that, over time, the details of lived experiences tend to become blurred or
distorted, but that’s okay, because you’re writing from your current perspective.

What Is Your Authentic Voice?

When using your authentic voice, you’re
writing down your genuine emotional feelings. When you write with your
authentic voice, it feels as if the words flow quite easily, and the writing
feels just right.

Your inner voice is taking charge, and you’re
writing from your heart and not your head. During difficult times, your
authentic voice may become even louder.

The best way to practice writing with your
authentic voice is to do so as if you’re seated across the table from your best
friend, telling a story. You’ll see how beautifully your words flow.

When reading others’ work, you can always tell
when they’re using their authentic writing voice because what they’re saying
rings true to you.

It’s a writer’s authentic voice that makes you
want to read more of his or her work. (For the type of personal writing I
do, please check out some of my articles here: www.dianaraab.com.)

Creative individuals such as authors, poets,
musicians, and healers are often thought of as those who are in touch with
their intuition and inner voice.

Gandhi admitted that he heard an inner voice
that shared this message with him: “You are on the right track; move neither to
the left nor the right, but keep to the straight and narrow.”

How to Start Writing

When writing, whether you choose to pen an
essay, memoir, poem, or journal entry, make sure you write what you want
to write, rather than what you think others want to hear. While writing, say to
yourself, “Here is how I see it,” or “This is how I recall it.”

When you write, it’s important not to think
about pleasing those you’re writing about. Chances are, if you’re not writing
your emotional truth, then you’re probably being too careful to write in a way that
doesn’t offend others.

For your best writing to emerge, you must be
willing to take risks, and that involves expressing your inner truth. As writer
Anaïs Nin once said, “The closer a writer keeps to emotional reality, the more
alive the writing will be.”

What to Write

You
might have had many life experiences that you’d like to share, but you’re not
sure where to start. My blog in Psychology Today titled “What
Story Should You Tell?” is a good guide. Here are some questions you might
consider reflecting on before embarking on the writing process:

• What life story has energy for you now?
• What thrills you?
• What do you continually think about?
• Who are your heroes and villains?
• Where are you in your life at present?
• What kinds of stories do you enjoy reading?

So, finding your
voice is not as difficult as it might seem. Be yourself and write like yourself
and the rest will fall into place!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What kind of
writing have you attempted to this point? Did you use your authentic voice? How
did that feel? What did you learn in the process about yourself, your
perspective, and your story? Please share in the comments below.

Incontinence is an initial warning sign that the strength of your pelvic floor is compromised in some way and no longer has the ability to hold the contents of the pelvis. The initial symptom is leaking urine but if left untreated, it can progress to the point of pelvic organ prolapse.

Pelvic health is
the conversation no one wants to have, so, unfortunately, incontinence has
become all too common.

Millions of people are suffering in silence. And with the number of incontinence products and adult diapers popping up in stores, we’ve normalized the issue. But being incontinent at any phase in your life is anything but normal. 

Incontinence has become such a major issue, it’s one of the top reasons women end up in nursing homes later in life. And it’s also a strong risk factor for future falls.

I want to stress again that
incontinence at any point during the lifespan is NOT NORMAL. The good news
is, it’s very treatable and reversible. By changing your environment and
your movement you can improve the health of your pelvis.

Here are 5 simple steps you can do
every day to strengthen your pelvis.

Wear Flat, Flexible Footwear

Wearing flat footwear is an essential first step to optimal pelvic health. The muscles that maintain pelvic integrity were designed to function best when we’re barefoot. By wearing a rigid shoe or shoe with ANY amount of heel lift, you’re causing the rest of your body to adjust to your footwear.

In order for the
muscles of the pelvis to do their job, they need to be in the right position.
The only way this happens is with footwear that is as close to barefoot as
possible. Being barefoot allows your pelvis to maintain a neutral position,
whereas wearing a heeled shoe will force your pelvis into a tucked position.

Pelvic tucking
throughout the day prevents your pelvic floor from doing its job effectively.
By taking this step alone you’re allowing the muscles of your pelvis to work
for you throughout the day, rather than you having to consciously activate them
and hope that they’ll work.

Sit on the Floor and Squat More Often

Most of the furniture we sit on day-in and day-out also prevents us from maintaining a neutral pelvic position, or from activating our core throughout the day. If you want to train your pelvic floor and core muscles to work together again, start sitting on the floor instead of in chairs as much as possible.

On a similar note,
squatting is essential to a healthy pelvis. Even resting in a supported squat
helps. Start to notice how many times you bend over to pick up items off the
floor and squat for them instead. Your core and pelvis will thank you.

Check-in with Your Pelvis and Ribcage

Above I mentioned
maintaining a neutral pelvis to keep the muscles of your pelvic floor in an
optimal position to promote function. Another important component to improving
the function of your core and pelvic floor is to keep your ribcage dropped.

The function of
your abdominal, pelvic, and breathing muscles depends on the relationship
between your ribcage and pelvis.

Due to being told for most of our lives to “stand with good posture,” most of us have the habit of ribcage thrusting. This is an excellent example of how focusing on “good” posture can lead to dysfunctional alignment, which doesn’t promote great muscle function over time.

Check-in with your
ribcage by placing a hand on your lower front ribs. If you feel them pushing
forward let them drop down toward your pelvis until you no longer feel them
pushing forward. Keep checking in with this position throughout the day and
remind yourself to drop your ribs.

Stretch the Backs of Your Legs

Like wearing flat shoes, stretching your calves and hamstrings on a daily basis will allow you to keep a neutral pelvis throughout the day. If the backs of your legs are tight, the muscles will pull your pelvis into a tucked position. So, make this an important part of your daily routine.

Walk Often

Walking is one of
the best activities you can do to promote a strong pelvic floor, especially
walking in flat shoes. Aim for 3 to 5 miles per day, and better yet if that
distance is spaced out throughout the day.

Walking gives your pelvic floor an opportunity to work and strengthen with each and every step you take, as long as you are able to keep a neutral pelvic position. If you do the above step and stretch BEFORE you walk, you’ll get more strengthening out of your walk.

By taking these simple steps you can
both reverse incontinence and set yourself up for a healthy pelvis throughout
your life! Better yet, these steps are simple and require little to no equipment
investment to get started. So, there’s no excuse to wait. Where can you get
started today?

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What
do you do to keep your pelvis strong? Do you do daily stretches? What about a
walking routine? Which of the five steps mentioned above seems easiest – or
most difficult – to do? Why? Please share with our community.

Disclaimer: This article is not intended to provide medical advice. Please consult with your doctor to get specific medical advice for your situation.

If you purchase an independently reviewed product or service through a link on our website, STYLECASTER may receive an affiliate commission.

We know — it feels a little too early for holiday shopping. But love it or hate it, the holidays and gift-giving season are right around the corner. Luckily, Amazon’s Holiday Beauty Haul preview sale is already live and the deals are seriously good, so good you’ll want to buy a few products for friends, family and yourself. There’s a ton of skincare, some makeup, nail polish and tools, fragrances, men’s products and so much more on sale. It can be overwhelming to choose from all the offerings so I’m helping you narrow it down, below.

I’ve been waiting about beauty and products for more than a decade so when I say I’ve tried it all, I mean it. I never recommend products without trying them myself, which my skin doesn’t love but keeps me honest. I dug through the pages and pages of Amazon Holiday Beauty Haul deals and found what I would purchase myself over and over again. Shop them all, below.

Elizabeth Arden.

Elizabeth Arden Miracle Balm, 8-Hour Cream

Use this cult-fave skin balm to hydrate and soothe any areas of the face and body. It rarely goes on sale.

Elemis.

Elemis Papaya Enzyme Peel

Exfoliate and remove dead skin cells in just 10-15 minutes with this at-home peel that’s actually gentle on the skin.

T3.

T3 AireBrush Duo

Some of the best deals are on hair tools, like this blow-dry brush for a whopping $57 off. Shiny, frizz-free blowouts are in your future.

Perricone MD.

Perricone MD Vitamin C Ester Citrus Brightening Cleanser

This non-drying face wash brightens with vitamin C without stripping the skin.

EltaMd.

EltaMD Skin Recovery Night Face Mask

Celebs (and non-celebs like me) swear by EltaMD’s sunscreen. It’s other skincare is stellar too, like this antioxidant-rich, hydrating face mask.

Alterna.

Alterna Caviar Anti-Aging Multiplying Volume Shampoo

This volumizing shampoo is gentle and hydrating for more fine hair types.

Makeup Eraser.

Makeup Eraser Mushroom 7-Day Set

I’m obsessed with removing my makeup with reusable, machine washable, microfiber cloths. These are seriously too cute with mushroom designs and a free hair clip set.

When your life gets hectic, and you find yourself agitated and overstressed, it’s time to take some time with yourself and slow down the pace. An excellent way to do that and reconnect with your mind and body is through meditation.

You must have heard of the benefits of meditation and how this practice can help improve focus and promote calmness and self-awareness. If you already meditate regularly, you have probably experienced the practice’s benefits on mental health.

Now add some crystals into your meditation routine to make it even better. Crystals have specific vibrations that can infuse your energy fields and support your intentions. For meditation, you’ll need some gemstones that carry gentle and calming vibes to wash away your stress and worries.

Mindful Meditation: Hold the Crystals in Your Palm

There are various ways to use crystals for meditation, and you can experiment and choose what works best for you. But I will try to describe some of the options we have regarding gemstones and meditation techniques.

During mindfulness meditation, we try to stay focused on the experience of the present moment. Every time our attention drifts away, we bring it back to our object of focus. Usually, the object of our focus is the breath, but crystal palm stones can also make great focal points.

Holding a palm stone in your hand during meditation will help you become aware of the present moment by using your tactile sense. You can notice the stone’s temperature and texture, its weight in your hands, and how it makes you feel. Don’t think too much about it; just feel the crystal and observe the sensations.

And if you want to enjoy the crystal’s metaphysical properties during mindfulness meditation, I recommend palm stones that relieve stress, such as Amethyst palm stones, or those that help with focus, such as Black Tourmaline and Tiger’s Eye.

Body Scan Meditation: Place the Crystals on Your Body

During a body scan meditation, people begin by focusing on one end of their body, usually their feet, then slowly and steadily scan their whole body to relax and release tension.

This meditation promotes relaxation and a sense of tranquility. It’s an excellent technique for overstressed or anxious people when practiced right before bedtime.

During your body scan meditation session, you can place crystals on your body to infuse your aura with peaceful energy or place them on different areas, such as the Third Eye or the Heart Chakra.

If you want to try a body scan session to relieve some tension, crystals such as Rose Quartz, Selenite, and Celestite can make great meditation tools. Place a Selenite crystal on your body during meditation to purify your energy and benefit from its deeply healing vibes.

If you need some self-love, use the Rose Quartz crystal known as the stone of universal love. It can also encourage you to learn self-compassion and to approach yourself with kindness.

Celestite is great for body scan meditation as it has grounding energies and can bring you a sense of harmony and connectedness. This crystal work best with the Third Eye Chakra, which is associated with wisdom, understanding, and elevated consciousness.

Loving-Kindness Meditation: Wear Crystals to Infuse Your Aura

During loving-kindness meditation, you imagine, focus, and direct your affection, love, and good energies toward yourself or someone else.

Those who regularly practice loving-kindness meditation can awaken and enhance their compassion, unconditional love, self-acceptance, kindness, and capacity for forgiveness.

It’s an excellent mediation technique for those struggling with anger, frustration, resentment, self-hatred, guilt, or low self-esteem.

Gemstones and crystals that resonate with the Heart Chakra are excellent companions in your loving-kindness practice. And to allow them to infuse your aura and help you open your heart, you can wear them close to your body as jewelry pieces.

Practice loving-kindness meditation while wearing crystals such as:

• Rhodochrosite – which helps in finding love and forgiveness.
• Green Aventurine – helps calm negative emotions, especially anger and nervousness.
• Malachite – draws out negative energies from the body and heals emotional pain.

Chakra Meditation: Place Crystals on Your Energy Centers

Practicing Chakra meditation will keep your energy centers balanced and energized. You can use seven crystals for each energy center for this meditation technique, or you can use crystals that resonate with more than one Chakra.

You will have to lie down comfortably and place the crystals on your body in the areas of your Chakras. You can have someone help you place all the crystals on your body if you find doing it alone difficult.

Relax and let the mind’s chatter switch off. Let the crystals infuse your energy fields while your awareness drifts to each stone placed on the body.

You can experiment and do this kind of meditation with the following crystals and gemstones:

• Red Jasper is tied to the Root Chakra.
• Moonstone is excellent for balancing your Sacral Chakra.
• Bumblebee Jasper resonates well with the Solar Plexus Chakra.
• Rhodonite is great at releasing energy blockages in the Heart Chakra.
• Chrysocolla heals the Throat Chakra.
• Black Obsidian activates and balances the Third Eye Chakra.
• Clear Quartz keeps the energy flowing in your Crown Chakra.

Cleanse Your Crystals of Stagnant and Negative Energy

Remember that crystals tend to absorb and store energy from their environment, and it’s not always the energy you need. That’s why your pretty little gemstones need to be cleansed of that unwanted, sometimes harmful energy.

You want to use your crystals for meditation when they are most effective, so I recommend some crystal cleansing methods. Choose which one is more convenient for you:

• Smoke your gemstones with white sage – make sure to keep a window open in the process, so the negative energy and the smoke can leave the room.
• Hold your crystals under running water for a few seconds while focusing on your intention, and let the water wash away toxic vibes.
• Bury your crystal in the soil where the unwanted energy can return – if you don’t have a garden, a pot or bowl filled with soil will do.
• Use visualization techniques to cleanse the stagnant energy – you can hold the gemstones in your hands while you visualize their purification.
• Simply place the desired crystals on a selenite bowl or larger stone – selenite will do the cleansing for you.
• Leave your crystals on a windowsill under the moonlight or sunbathe them to restore the natural energy of the stones – make sure you research which crystals fade if exposed to the sun too much.

Do you own crystals or gemstones? Which ones are your favorite? What do you use them for? Have you used crystals/gemstones for meditation?

Over the years, I have had a unique opportunity to visit many homes as a real estate appraiser and broker. Looking back, surprisingly, the most memorable homes that I visited were not the most expensive, largest or grandiose!

They were the homes I visited where it was obvious that people took pride in where they lived, regardless of the size, quality or price of their home. It was simply pride of ownership that made their homes shine.

The Feel of a Home

Typically, the homes that I visited which were super expensive, larger than large and lavishly furnished looked absolutely gorgeous and shined in the luxury home magazines but did not portray the feel of a “home.”

My favorite “homes” were those with numerous pictures displayed on the walls of family, friends or adventures! These “homes” also had furniture from many different eras that may have represented gifts from family or friends in the past, finds from different areas visited or pieces of furniture that the home occupants just could not part with.

The furnishings may not have been perfectly matched, or trending, but they reflected the occupants’ taste and personality and obviously made the occupants happy.

A Home Says a Lot About the Owner

A duplex home I visited one day helped me to clearly see how a home can and does reflect the owners and create a feeling to guests. A duplex home is a home consisting of two dwelling units connected together with a shared wall. Most often, duplex homes are rentals used for income to the owner; however, in this case, the owner of the duplex home chose to live in the entire home, occupying both units.

Something Missing

I had been given access to both sides of the duplex in order to do a home appraisal. As I entered side A of the duplex home, I saw a sparkling marble tile entry floor, pristine faux painted walls accented with bold moldings, exquisite furniture, artwork and fine pieces adorning every room and almost zero clutter.

The kitchen was open with shiny, spotless quartz countertops, top of the line appliances and an eating area fit for a king. The two bedrooms were similar quality of the living and kitchen area with fine mahogany flooring, grand wood trim and fine furnishings.

It was definitely magazine worthy and looked like a home for royalty. I was impressed with the quality, the furnishings and the detail that was reflected from floor to ceiling! Did I feel “at home” in side A? Would I want to reside there? The answer to both questions was a resounding “No.”

The Real Home

Now, let me tell you what I saw in side B of the duplex home! As I entered the home, I saw an entry foyer with a slightly dated wood parquet flooring covered by nice throw rugs. Many varieties of home furnishings consisting of old, new and homemade pieces in the living areas.

There were a pet bed and food dish, magazines scattered about, collections of figurines, family photos, and a bit of clutter. The kitchen of side B was the same size of side A, yet the countertops were filled with typical kitchen power tools such as blender, toaster, waffle maker and more.

A few potholders, hand-towels and trivets were lying about. The appliances were typical and nothing out of the ordinary. The two bedrooms were carpeted and contained older bedroom furniture sets covered with family quilts. Loads of family photos and family adventure photos were on display as well.

Did I feel “at home” in side B? Would I want to reside there? My answer to both questions was “Yes.” I felt at home and comfortable. I later learned that the owner of the home actually lived in side B and only used side A to entertain guests occasionally.

What This Means

I was impressed with side A, yet wanted and preferred to live in side B. What does that really say about a home being a “home”? When you are looking to purchase a home, do you want a home you are super impressed with or a home that you feel at home in?

All too often, I think we, as home buyers, may purchase homes based on our first impressions and find out later that the home may not be the home that is most livable and suitable for our needs. And if you’re looking to sell your home, keep this truth in mind as well.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What type of home would you really prefer to live in: a home that impresses or a home that really feels “lived in or livable”? Can your home be a bit of both? Should your home reflect how you live or how you want to portray your home to others?