Month: October 2023

Solo travel can be
daunting.

Most of your life,
someone else has handled the travel – the reservations, the research, the
budgeting.

Now, suddenly, for
whatever reason – it’s up to you. Not only do you have to plan it all, but you
actually have to go. There. On your own.

And that can be scary.

That’s the bad news.
The good news is that it doesn’t have to be, because solo travel after 60 can
be easy, safe, and, more than anything, fulfilling beyond your wildest dreams.

Solo Travel – Simplified

Yes, I did say easy,
because there’s a method to it and following a few simple steps will put you in
the right frame of mind to go out there and grab the world on your own terms.

Acceptance

Don’t wish for a
partner. Accept that you’re going on your own, and you’ve won half the battle.

Comfort

Choose a comfortable,
familiar destination for your first trip, somewhere you won’t feel too out of
place.

A weekend trip to a
new city down the road. A country that’s socially similar – Canada, for example
– or one where English is spoken, like England or Scotland or Ireland or, if
you’re feeling intrepid, East or Southern Africa.

Duration

Make it short. That
way you won’t have time to miss home, and if you feel the trip wasn’t long
enough, you’ll be able to make the next one longer.

Planning

It is vital to have a
plan. You can always throw it out the window but the comfort of knowing where
you’re going and when will help boost your peace of mind.

Boldness

Pat yourself on the
back. You’ve got this. You’re doing it. It’s your trip and no one is going to
take it away from you.

Solo Travel – The Safe Way

As we get older and
the carefreeness of our youth occasionally evaporates, little worries begin
seeping in. What if I get sick? What if I’m robbed?

Tell yourself this:
any one of those things could happen at home. You don’t have to be in Paris or
Pamplona. Yes, things happen. And yes, you can do a lot to make sure they
don’t.

Plan for Your Health

Getting sick is no fun
anywhere, least of all when you’re in a strange place by yourself. Your first
line of defense is robust health
insurance. If you get ill, at least you won’t have to sell everything you own to
get medical attention.

The next thing to do
is make sure you have the name of a reliable practitioner and hospital at your
destination, someone who speaks English.

You can often get this
from your Embassy, but you can also find this information online. You’ll feel a
lot safer if you’re already armed with those phone numbers before you even
land.

And if you’re staying
in a hotel, know that hotels always have doctors either on call or on their
roster: just ring reception if you’re feeling poorly.

Plan for Your Safety

Getting robbed is a
common fear at any age. We’ve already left most valuables at home and the last thing
we need is the theft of what little we’ve taken with us (not to mention the
pain of having to hunt down some cash and cancel credit cards).

I have a few tricks I
use when I’m traveling to make sure my stuff stays mine.

The first is to secure
my hotel room. When I’m in it, I use an alarm system. It can be as simple as
sticking a plastic wedge under the door or as sophisticated as a portable door
handle alarm – you hang it on the doorknob and if someone tries to enter your
room, the entire neighborhood will hear the siren.

When I’m out of my
room, I often leave the radio on to discourage opportunistic thieves. I also never
leave anything of value in my room.

I use a cross-body bag
that’s nearly impregnable and my little laptop fits right into it. I sometimes
alternate with an anti-theft daypack. And if I don’t have my laptop with me, I
use a money belt (some of the wider ones are now made to be comfortable even
for my expanding waistline).

The Joys of Solo Travel

Practical measures are
well and good, but the true reward of solo travel comes from the accomplishment
of coming home a changed person.

Imagine the fears and
hurdles you overcame on your first trip – what an accomplishment! If you could
do that, what else could you do?

Here are just a few by-products of solo travel: you’ll feel greater self-confidence, you’ll feel stronger and better able to cope with the unexpected, you’ll open up to the world… and you’ll be better able to face whatever life throws at you.

After all, you’ve just
been away, alone, and you made it there – and back.

Now, bring on the next
challenge!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What feelings does the
concept of traveling solo evoke in you? How can you overcome them? Have you
tried going somewhere on your own? How far from home did you go? What was the
experience like? Please share with the women in our community.

My husband died in my arms right before Valentine’s Day 16 years ago. I soon found a quote by Alan Watts that became my mantra for many months afterward as I moved through the initial phases of widowhood: “The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”

On the fifth anniversary of my late husband’s passing, I wrote these words in my journal: “I am so much more than just a widow. I’m a thriving, independent woman!” That day, I knew I was in Stage 3, a phase marked by remarkable transformation for many widows.

This chapter held its rewards for me, as it does for other women who experience the profound pain of a spouse’s death.

It’s a time of reawakening and embracing life with renewed purpose. It’s about finding joy, nurturing relationships, and leaving a legacy beyond our lifetime. For some, as it was for me, it may even be a time of reinvention. Each widow’s journey is unique, but the common thread that unites them is the resilience and strength to navigate this path with grace and courage.

As those of us who have experienced widowhood honor the past and embrace the future, we not only survive but thrive, and in doing so, we can inspire others.

Go from Grief to Growth

Stage 1, the grieving phase, focuses on immediate needs. Widows apply for death benefits, assess their financial situation, and avoid making significant, irreversible financial decisions. For those who practice yoga, it’s akin to taking deep breaths and finding new stability without their spouse. While deeply personal, grief can be a shared experience. Support from friends, family, or care groups can be a lifeline during this challenging time. Focus on self-care.

Navigate Financial Waters

As widows transition into Stage 2, the growth phase, they delve deeper into financial matters. This step may involve adjusting investment strategies, evaluating insurance coverage, updating wills and beneficiary forms, and contemplating whether to stay in their homes or relocate.

For those with minor children, considerations extend to managing finances as a single-parent family. Consider pre- and post-retirement issues. Life starts to regain equilibrium. It’s a time for careful planning, so seeking guidance from professionals experienced in assisting surviving spouses can be invaluable.

Embrace Transformation

Stage 3 can represent a period of fulfillment and transformation. This stage carries profound significance as new purposes and interests begin to emerge. As widows embrace life without their spouse, they may engage in advanced wealth-management issues, including more complex legacy planning, bequests, and trust agreements.

They may also consider integrating a charitable aspect into their plans. Some widows embark on new careers, volunteer work, or start a business during Stage 3. It’s a time to reflect on the legacy they wish to leave behind and how to ensure their financial resources align with their values.

For me, discovering a new focus in life was an exhilarating journey. Advocating for widows and their financial issues became my passion and mission going forward. That included writing, speaking, and doing research about widows and money. Indeed, this contributed significantly to my personal healing process.

Many widows have shared with me that they experienced renewed purpose through extended family bonds, professional work, and meaningful volunteer activities. Finding a sense of purpose beyond oneself can be profoundly fulfilling and transformative.

Find Joy

During Stage 3, spending time with loved ones, taking up a different hobby, or traveling to new locations can be especially fun. The companionship of family and friends, with cherished delightful moments and experiences, is terrific. I love hosting family gatherings with our adult kids and grandchildren for several days.

Same for friendship groups, such as the annual “girlfriends getaway” I do with three gals from across the country. We rent an Airbnb house for several days, choosing an exciting site to visit. We have so much fun together on these trips. I made a photo collage to lock in memories after we traveled to Asheville, North Carolina.

Manage Relationships

For those considering a new romantic relationship, exercise caution. Unscrupulous suitors may expect financial support from widows. Keep your financial matters private until you understand the other person better.

Discussing finances with a partner is imperative when considering remarriage or a committed long-term relationship. Finding love again can be a beautiful part of the journey. Still, it’s essential to approach it with care and consideration. Based on our research of widows who re-partnered, here are ten questions to ask your potential partner before committing.

As a wise 92-year-old widow told me, “Stay away from those who see you as a purse or a nurse.” She was right! I met some of those fellows, including one guy who asked for a loan on our second date. Bye-bye to him quickly! Through my research on widows and money, I’ve heard many horror stories from duped women.

I met Charlie four years after my late husband died. His wife passed away nine years previously. He and I got along well, including a similar philosophy about money. He’s also great with the outdoor grill, while Charlie says I bake award-winning gingersnap and chocolate chip cookies! Although I initially didn’t plan to remarry, we tied the knot at a small backyard wedding, with our blended families present seven years later. This year, we celebrated our fifth anniversary.

Craft Your Legacy

Stage 3 is an ideal time for sharing one’s stories, values, history, and gifts for future generations. These activities can take various forms, such as print, photo, video, audio recordings, or documents. They might include scrapbooks, paintings, memory books, and cookbooks.

Suppose you want to share your beliefs, aspirations, memories, and life experiences with your family and friends. In that case, this free eBooklet, Legacy Lifeprint Letters & Stories, may be helpful. I’ve written several legacy letters for my family members.

Leave a Lasting Impact

As I’ve done, some may include a charitable gift in their estate plan. After my passing, a portion of my retirement account will benefit Soaring Spirits International, an organization serving widowed persons. I included several other profits promoting social and racial justice work, too.

Embrace Your Transformed Life

While most widows will always cherish their late spouse and their shared life, widowhood offers a different and meaningful path forward. It’s a phase where we can discover the depths of our resilience, our passions’ power, and our spirit’s strength.

Yes, we have loved. Yes, we have lost a significant part of our previous life. But, as we steps into this transformed life, we can discover a meaning and purpose that is uniquely our own. Embrace Stage 3 with open arms and an open heart. Widows Rock!

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Are you a Stage 3 widow or on your way to this phase? Have you observed a friend or relative in Stage 3? What personal insights can you share with other women? We’d love to post your thoughts here.

Have you ever stopped to consider how balance affects your daily activities?

Until we notice changes in our balance, we think it’s only needed for gymnastics or ice skating.

However, what many of us don’t realize is how crucial balance is for everyday activities. We take it for granted until we start to experience difficulties with our balance.

Understanding the importance of balance can empower us to take action to maintain or improve it, enriching our daily lives.

Keep reading to find out which daily activities rely on good balance. You’ll read stories from people like you who have improved their balance and noticed the difference in their everyday lives.

Graceful Gardening

Good balance is essential in the garden, especially for stepping around pots or over bedding plants, reaching to prune roses, and walking on uneven ground.

If you’re a keen gardener, you know that once you start, it’s hard to stop. But fatigue can affect our balance, making us more prone to tripping.

Meet Sarah, a 69-year-old gardening enthusiast. Working in the garden was becoming a struggle as she felt more unsteady on her feet. But, after incorporating balance exercises into her routine, she’s back to tending her roses and herbs with ease. ‘I can now kneel to pull weeds and stand back up without any help, all thanks to focusing on my balance,’ says Sarah.

Playtime with Grandchildren

When you’re with your grandchildren, you want to be fully present and focused on them.

You don’t want to just watch them play, you want to get involved and join in the fun. Good balance gives you the freedom to run, jump, and play in all kinds of activities.

Tom, a 68-year-old grandfather, found himself sitting out of his grandchildren’s playtime due to balance concerns. After committing to a balance training programme, he’s back to being the ‘fun grandpa,’ even playing tag and hopscotch. ‘I never thought I’d be able to keep up with them again, but here I am, and it feels fantastic,’ Tom beams.

Travel with Confidence

Whether getting to your destination or enjoying it once you arrive, good balance can make travel more enjoyable and less stressful.

Meet Linda, a retired teacher and avid traveller. She started feeling anxious about her upcoming European vacation due to balance issues. After focusing on improving her balance, she not only enjoyed her trip but also managed to hike a small hill in the French countryside. ‘I felt so confident and free, like I had regained a part of myself,’ Linda shares.

Mastering Steps, Stairs, and Kerbs

Stairs at home might be manageable, but in public places like train stations or art galleries, they can be a real challenge. Especially if they’re steep or lack handrails.

John, a 75-year-old culture buff, found himself avoiding places with stairs or steps without handrails. He decided to take action and started a balance-focused exercise program. Now, he confidently takes the stairs and enjoys going to theaters, museums and exhibitions that he had been avoiding. ‘It’s like I’ve expanded my world again,’ says John.

Exercise your stepping with this video:

Walking Wonders

Walking on uneven ground, like cobblestones or paths in the park, requires good balance.

Emily, a 67-year-old artist, loved her morning walks but started to feel unsteady on uneven terrain and even tripped on some cracked paving. She took up balance exercises and now enjoys her nature walks more than ever. ‘I can walk on the bumpy paths of my favorite park without fear. It’s liberating,’ Emily exclaims.

Here’s an exercise to strengthen your ankles so you can walk more easily.

For more tips and video guidance, read 5 TIPS FOR WALKING WELL: FEEL MORE CONFIDENT WALKING TODAY.

What Matters Most to You?

Are you a keen gardener, a travel enthusiast, or someone who takes great joy in spending time with your grandchildren? Do you love spending time out in nature or prefer contemplating the nuances of a famous painting?

Whatever your answer, you’ll want to do everything you can to improve your balance so you can feel steady on your feet and confident to keep doing all the things that matter to you.

Kickstart Your Journey to Better Balance

Everyone can improve their balance with the right exercise programme. And just a few minutes a day is enough.

The FREE Balance Blueprint from Vida Wellness can help you if you want to start doing exercises that are tailored specifically to those who need improvement with their balance.

Join the Conversation:

I hope you’ve found this article helpful. What resonated with you from the activities listed? What would you like to maintain or improve your balance for? We’d love to hear from you. Join the conversation below!

Originally posted at: Taylor Ann Green’s Colorblock Turtleneck

2nd Photo + Info: @paige_desorbo

Originally posted at: Paige DeSorbo’s Green Cargo Pants