Month: October 2024

I realize this may seem like an odd title/question but stay with me. The idea came to me from a quote I read by Steve Jobs:

“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life… Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. … Stay hungry. Stay foolish.”

—Steve Jobs

He was right. There is no reason not to follow your heart. Whether it’s in love, discovering what you desire, or pursuing your passions; it’s never too late. We do have something to lose however, if we don’t.

What Lights You Up?

When was the last time you asked yourself, “What lights me up?”

For me, there was no question as to the answer. Even as a kid I lit up like a spotlight from the inside out whenever I could be on stage. Now I also love writing and doing my podcast Loving Later Life.

Sometimes, as we get older, what revs our engine can change completely over time or evolve into something similar but different. What’s important is keeping our tank full.

Is there something you’d like to do, or try, or do again that would excite you, or at the very least has you feeling curious?

Not sure? Try occasionally making an appointment with yourself for a tune-up to look under the hood to see how you’re doing. We often look to others for answers as if they know us better than we know ourselves.

Trust yourself, because you know.

Finding Your Passion

I recently heard Martha Beck talking about finding our passion, and she said, “Be rested, keep an open mind, then let yourself feel pulled and look for something that feels like, ‘Oh that’s cool that’s really cool. I wish I could do that.’”

Then I say, be careful not to talk yourself out of it! Our brains want to keep us safe and comfortable. Anything that feels risky and out of our comfort zone will set off an alarm to our brain. That will then start the conveyor belt of all kinds of reasons why we shouldn’t do whatever we’re considering.

Have You Thought Any of These?

“I would be terrible at that.”

“I haven’t done it in so long, it’s too late now.”

“I don’t have enough energy anymore.”

“The door closed on that a long time ago.”

“I don’t have the time.”

“I don’t have the money.”

“I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“That could never happen.”

“I’m too old for that.”

I could go on and on. Why? Because I’ve said it all to myself at one time or another. But as I’ve gotten older, and I’ve realized that the runway ahead is shorter than the one behind, I’ve decided to say, “What the $&*#! I’m going for it. I’m going to take a risk.”

It’s so easy to get caught up in the how’s and the what ifs, but they just slam on the brakes while you’re trying to step on the gas.

You Simply Have to Start

I heard someone say recently, “Start before you’re ready.”

And to that I’ll add, start before death literally does become the motivator. The number one regret of the dying is not what they did do, but what they didn’t do.

We almost never feel ready to try something that is out of our comfort zone. It’s scary. We fear the worst outcomes and/or the uncertainty of what will be.

But all possibilities live in the land of uncertainty and the outcome isn’t what matters!

It’s about the experience of trying something regardless of what happens. If you risk dating someone and it doesn’t work out, could you be hurt? Absolutely. If you try painting and it doesn’t excite you like you thought, could you be disappointed? Sure. But you tried. Wouldn’t it be worse to never try at all??

We aren’t here to sit on the sidelines of our life.

Our time is limited and goes by quickly regardless, so doesn’t it make sense to find a way to spend some of it doing something we love?

I’ll let Steve Jobs have the last word…

“You’ve got to find what you love. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet keep looking, and don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And like any great relationship it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking, don’t settle.”

—Steve Jobs

Please Join the Conversation:

Is there something you’ve wanted to try doing? What is stopping you from trying? Are you having trouble figuring out what will light you up? What would you say to support someone else? Let’s support one another in conversation!

Will they work it out?

Dozens of models walked the runway, but one past face was missing.

Over the years, self-publishing has evolved, but what hasn’t changed is the accessibility for the average person to become a published author. Not everyone wants, or needs, to write full-time like I do, so below I’ve listed a number of ways you can use the phenomenon of self-publishing to your benefit.

Start a Second Career

If you’ve ever wanted to be a full-time author and have time to pursue your dream, self-publishing is a great option for a second career later in life. It’s not too late to achieve your dreams, and having a second career can not only be fulfilling, it can be financially rewarding.

Here are examples of famous people who had success later in life:

• Thanks to launching her first book, Entertaining, after age 40, by the time Martha Stewart was 50, she was a household name.
• Julia Child made her television debut at 51.
• Colonel Sanders sold his first KFC franchise after the age of 65.
• At 73, Duncan Hines licensed his name for cake mixes.
• Grandma Moses started seriously painting at 78, and by the time of her death had produced approximately 2000 paintings.

If you’ve always wanted to be published, don’t let age hold you back.

Generate Extra Income in Retirement

Self-publishing offers the flexibility of writing and publishing on your own terms. In doing so, you can earn additional income in your spare time and supplement your retirement funds.

Depending on the popularity of your books, you can earn passive income for years. You can also use the same story to generate additional income streams by creating audiobooks, translations, licensing to apps, and taking advantage of other opportunities. All of this can be done from the comfort of your own home by selling your self-published titles online.

Add Credibility to Your Business

If you’re a consultant, public speaker, or provide some other service, a self-published book can enhance your business. By selling copies at workshops and speaking engagements, you’ll establish another revenue stream. Perhaps more important, your book becomes a marketing tool that adds to your credibility.

Think outside the box. This opportunity is not limited to marketers and self-help gurus. For example, if you own a restaurant or are a personal chef, self-publish a cookbook. If you’re a minister or counselor, put together a book that provides guidance to potential people seeking your counsel.

Write Your Memoir or Autobiography

Have you lived an interesting life or, as someone mentioned in the comments of my article How to Become a Published Author, gone through an ordeal that could be inspirational for others to read? Unless you’re famous, telling your personal story is unlikely to generate the type of interest and income as commercial fiction would. But writing and self-publishing your memoir or autobiography could be a cathartic process, inspire others going through a similar experience, or provide a meaningful legacy for your loved ones.

Preserve Family History

Along the same lines as a memoir or autobiography, preserving your family history in a book is unlikely to result in significant financial gain. However, it ensures your family stories and traditions are passed down, becoming a keepsake for future generations. The stories can help connect family members and instill pride in their accomplishments.

Get a New Hobby

Maybe you don’t want to make money from writing and want to write for fun, as a hobby. If that’s the case, you can still self-publish your books. The satisfaction you experience from completing a novel will exponentially increase when you read it on your tablet or hold a print copy in your hands that fits on your bookshelf.

Tapping into your creativity can bring joy in your later years, and you’re not limited to writing adult novels. How much fun would it be to write stories for your grandchildren and use their names for the characters? Imagine reading them that bedtime story. They’ll never forget it!

Conclusion

As you can see, there are numerous ways to use self-publishing to your benefit, whether you want to earn income or simply have fun. The good news is, there are plenty of resources available to help you be successful, no matter which path you choose.

Lots of people get the writing bug but don’t know where or how to start, and I’d love to make that happen for you in 2025. I’m running a giveaway for novice self-publishers who have published 0-3 books, and I partnered with two of my favorite vendors – Deranged Doctor Design and The Editing Hall. Enter the giveaway if you’re ready to explore writing on a different level.

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Let’s Have a Conversation:

Can you think of other ways you can use self-publishing to your benefit? Have you done any of the six options listed above?

Role reversal, whether it is as a parent/child or even a grandparent/grandchild, never quite feels right. Becoming the “let me help you” person in the relationship is not how it likely went for most of your life. But with aging, that sometimes changes or needs to change for the safety and best health of the person you love.

And then you add in the taboo topic of money, and the conversations become even more challenging. I am talking about approaching an aging family member or friend to help them with their financial life.

Your Guide Book on This Subject

I recently had the pleasure of meeting a financial journalist and author, Cameron Huddleston. A few years ago, she wrote the book Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk: How to Have Essential Conversations with Your Parents About Their Finances. And I was so pleased to see her hit the nail on the head with all of the related areas that I have witnessed over the past 20+ years as a financial advisor working with families. Her comprehensive book was passionately created out of her own first-hand experience.

Experience Is the Best Teacher

Cameron shared with me, as she does in her book, that her mom was living on her own (after a divorce). And she began noticing some signs of her mother’s memory loss. Cameron never had detailed financial conversations before that except when the topic of long-term care had come up. On that subject, she had encouraged her mom to look into options for paying for care in case it would ever be needed, especially since she was living on her own.

But as is the case with many long-term care insurance applicants, Cameron’s mom found out that she was uninsurable (due to a pre-existing condition in this case). In hindsight, Cameron feels that would have been the perfect opportunity to talk more with her mom (to understand her financial situation regarding her assets, to ask about what care she might want if that became a need, etc.).

Detective Work

As with many families, once she saw continued signs of memory loss, then it became a scramble to see an estate planning attorney to update legal documents. The attorney recommended letting the bank know that she was her mom’s financial power of attorney as an important next step.

Then Cameron began monitoring her mom’s financial life from behind the scenes. She shared that it felt like detective work to even find information since her mom was understandably forgetting things and wouldn’t always know the answer when she was asked a question.

A Book Was Born

I asked Cameron what was the last straw, the switch that flipped in her mind, motivating her to share her experience in a book. She said it was during an interview for a podcast. Both hosts said, “Boy, I should be talking with my parents!” Then the tech person and literally everyone else in the room was saying the same thing: “You’ve opened my eyes!” “I need to be talking to my parents!” “This could be me, too!”

The two things I most like about Cameron’s book are its comprehensiveness and the step-by-step guide as to what to do when stepping into this new role of partnering with parents on their finances.

All the Things

Who knew there would be so many approaches, angles, and people potentially involved in this idea of talking with your parents about their finances? I want to share a few takeaways that I found extremely true in having seen this play out with actual families over the years:

Have a Plan

“Have a plan for how you are going to approach this,” Cameron advises. Talking to siblings first should be part of that plan so nothing is behind their back, no one assumes bad intentions, and you can agree on who should have the discussion, the best time to have it, and how to start the conversation.

Try Different Approaches

Try a variety of approaches: consider asking parents for financial advice even if you don’t really need it and then keep asking questions to keep conversations going. Talk about scams and offer to help (ways to protect, credit reports); share a story (how it went well or badly); and don’t give up after one try as it may take a variety of approaches.

Enlist a Trusted Third Party

Get a trusted third party involved: a family friend, another family member, a professional like clergy, an estate planning attorney, or a financial advisor.

Don’t Wait for an Emergency

Cameron’s book even gives a step-by-step guide on how to approach the conversation and actions to take when one thing doesn’t work once you hopefully begin moving forward. Her advice mirrors mine, “Don’t wait for the health issue or when they have to ask for help or when they can’t afford something!” She reminds us all to do it while everyone is healthy. In emergency mode, emotions run high and we tend not to think or talk rationally which makes a difficult time even harder.

One final thought is her wise call to action. “These conversations are about finding out what your parents’ wishes are so that you can honor those wishes.”

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How did you or your family approach your parents about helping them with financial planning-related topics? Has anything you experienced with your parents changed the way you think about communicating with your adult children? If you or your parent are/were single, how does that change the situation?