Month: December 2024

What’s the answer?

On a recent trip to Ireland, Wales, and England, I was hoping to keep a daily travel journal. Although, I’m a writer by trade, it seemed a daunting task. Taking the time each and every day of the trip to consider what I had seen and experienced is one thing, but then writing it all down in a cohesive readable fashion seemed another. Too much for a pleasure trip, it seemed. I never was a daily diary keeper or one who regularly journaled, still I wanted to remember this special journey in writing in some way. I decided to write a daily poem.

The Idea

Many of us keep journals when we travel, writing down simple thoughts, dates, and places, and sometimes taking time to write lengthy remembrances. But this time, I thought committing to the idea of creating verse would be a more immediate, emotionally driven way to do it. And maybe more fun.

I’ve written some poetry, some even published, but poetry would not be considered my main genre. And honestly, that is not the point at all. It is not about whether you can write the best poetry, or even good poetry. And maybe you’ve never tried to write a poem. It doesn’t matter.

The idea is simply about documenting one’s emotional journey, and any of us can do that. Travel is a good way to begin, but you can do it as an everyday practice, too. Remember what author John Steinbeck wrote: “And now that you don’t have to be perfect you can be good.”

I told myself I did not want to belabor every word while writing the poem, but instead to let the poems rise out of the moment, making only minor adjustment or word changes within only a few minutes after their initial creation.

Essentially, they were written in of-the-moment emotion. They were poems of the present, written with the heart, written to be just for now.

Keep them short, simple, and use your senses – what you see, hear, and smell.Write what is in your soul. Simple. Immediate. Let it be what it is at that singular time. This is your poetry. You make the rules. This permits it to be the perfect discipline for stretching your creative side, a process many medical professionals say helps us cognitively and emotionally in our later years.

Example Poetry

Part of the trip brought me to Kinsale, Ireland. If you are not familiar, it’s a fishing port in the southern part of the country with colorful houses and incredible restaurants filled with seafood pulled from waters just feet away. On the interior wall of one establishment were the black-and-white photographs of a dozen fishermen, men and women who worked the nearby sea for years, along with their fathers before them.

Those photographs sparked a short poem.

The Fishermen

The sea has stained his face in streams of blood and salt,

his father had the same, and the father before him, too,

gathering oysters and mussels in water-soaked knots of briny nets.

It’s a good day in Kinsale when the fishermen rest

with a smoke and a pint as laughter crackles

as they talk of good weather and women,

and the goodbyes are only until tomorrow

when dawn awakens to the silent sound

of silvery wakes on a quiet sea.

Poems as Diary Entries

The poem served as a record in verse for a specific and very particular evening in Ireland. Is it great poetry? No. It is poetry of experience? Yes. And so, it can mark the minutes of a life. It can document the singular and yet deep weight of a specific time and place. Call it instant poetry, poetry that has no other purpose than to say, “I was here. This is what I saw. What I felt at this very moment.”

So, on your next adventure – around the world or around the block on your daily walk – let your senses take over, and then later in a quiet moment, write in verse what you feel. Short. Long. In between. Rhyme or not. Just let it out. Let your creativity loose.

I wrote 13 poems on my trip, 13 hyper-focused exchanges, one each day, observations, and emotions, my personal poetic diary of nearly two weeks of traveling to new and unforgettable places. You can do the same. Let your heart and experiences be your guide and you’ll have a unique and memorable diary of your place in this world.

Questions for Reflection:

What does poetry mean to you? Have you tried writing poems to express your feelings when you travel? Do you keep a travel journal? What do you write in it?

I once saw a clip from the old Bob Newhart Show, (wasn’t he the greatest?!), where he had a patient come for her therapy session and after she told him what she was worrying about, he quickly said, “Stop it!” She looked at him quizzically, and he said, “Just stop it!” Each time she tried to explain further, he kept interrupting her, repeating, “Stop it, just stop it!”

It was a funny bit, but not exactly what you want to hear from your therapist! “Just stop it.” Wouldn’t it be nice if it were that easy?

Well, I created a simple (I didn’t say easy!) 3 step process to help myself and my clients to stop, in their tracks, the thoughts that don’t serve us! But first, take a look and see if some of these thoughts below sound familiar…

“You idiot, how could you have forgotten to (fill in the blank), or “You look so fat, you look so old, your best days are behind you, how can you be so stupid” etc. etc. etc. Now I ask, would you ever say any of the above to a dear friend? Something tells me, that’s a no!

We Need to Become More Aware About How We Talk to Ourselves

If you want to:

Stop: worrying about the future and instead,
Start: being present each day and let the future unfold.

Stop: letting what has happened to you continue to define who you are and instead,
Start: living your best life.

Stop: the quicksand of limiting beliefs keeping you stuck in your fears and instead,
Start: flying free.

Stop: worrying about the ‘how,’ constantly overthinking things and instead,
Start: taking the next best step.

Then I invite you to try the 3-step process I call:

Notice It, Name It, Reframe It!

Here are several examples and the steps to take giving you an idea of how to practice.

Experiencing a Big Life Change

If you are facing a big life change whether it’s a loss, or a move, or a health challenge, and you find yourself thinking things like, “I can’t handle this. I don’t know where to begin. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this, I want things to be different.”

Notice it: Whoa, I know this is challenging, but these thoughts aren’t going to serve me.

Name it: I am feeling scared, and my thoughts are going to the dark side.

Reframe it: It is important that I feel my feelings and remember that I can handle anything if I stay present, breathe, and keep taking the next best step. When I fight against reality it makes things worse. I can do this. I’ve got this. I will ask for support when I need it, and I will get through this.

Suffering from Self-Abuse

If you have thoughts like,“You idiot, how could you have forgotten to do that, why did you do that, when will you ever learn?”

Notice it: I just literally verbally abused myself.

Name it: I just called myself an idiot. It’s not true and I won’t be spoken to like that!

Reframe it: I am doing the best I can. I will keep doing the best I can, and that is enough.

Broken Self-Image

If when you look in the mirror, you think, “You look so fat and ugly, when are you going to lose weight!”

Notice it: Holy crap, I just fat shamed myself!

Name it: That was so mean and nasty. I’d never say that to anyone.

Reframe it: I am not perfect, and no one is. I want to be healthy and take care of my body. It has gotten me through a lot, and I am so grateful for it. I will continue to seek out ways to do what’s best for my health and be kinder to myself.

Pay Attention to Your Thoughts so That You Can Begin to Notice It, Name It, Reframe It

When first beginning to go through this process, I have found that it helps to write it all down. And as you become more aware of the things you say to yourself, remember to give yourself grace and compassion. We don’t want to make it worse by judging and berating ourselves for having the thoughts!

Each time you practice Notice it, Name it, Reframe it, you are retraining your brain to know that you won’t allow anyone to talk to you unkindly. Not even you!

Reflection Question:

What are some of the things you have said to yourself that you would be comfortable sharing here? (This can help us to feel less alone!) Would you like to try going through the 3 steps here with something you’ve said?

What’s the answer?

What’s the answer?