Month: March 2025

You’ve tried. Over and over.

You set the goals. You make the plan. You tell yourself, “This time will be different.”

Yet here you are again – frustrated, exhausted, wondering why your body isn’t responding the way it used to.

The problem isn’t you. More than likely, it’s the approach you’ve been taught to take.

We’re told that success comes from pushing harder, being more disciplined, sticking to a rigid plan. But what if the real key to lasting health isn’t about force? What if it’s about meeting yourself where you are – working with your current reality instead of against it?

This shift has the opportunity to change everything.

The Danger of the “Shoulds” in Your Health Journey

How many times have you thought:

• “I should be able to work out five times a week.”
• “I should be able to lose two pounds a week.”
• “I should want to eat healthy all the time.”

These expectations often come from younger versions of ourselves or outdated diet culture messages. But they don’t account for your current energy levels, schedule, or the reality of midlife and beyond.

When we don’t meet these unrealistic “shoulds,” we blame ourselves, leading to guilt, frustration, and self-doubt. The truth? It’s not about willpower. It’s about working with your real-life circumstances instead of forcing yourself into an old model that no longer fits.

How Unrealistic Expectations Set You Up for Failure

Many women in midlife set health goals based on a past version of themselves.

You might think, I used to run three miles, so I should be able to do it again. Or, I used to weigh X pounds, so that’s my goal.

But your body, hormones, and responsibilities have changed. Expecting yourself to function exactly as you did in your 30s or 40s sets you up for a cycle of failure:

1. You set an extreme goal.
2. You struggle to meet it.
3. You blame yourself.
4. You feel frustrated and defeated.
5. You assume you just need to “try harder.”

Instead of chasing an old version of yourself, what if you set goals that matched where you are today?

The Power of Small, Achievable Changes

One of the biggest roadblocks to health success is an all-or-nothing mindset.

If I can’t work out for an hour, why bother?

 If I eat something “bad,” the whole day is ruined.

This thinking keeps you stuck. The truth? Small, consistent changes lead to real results.

Try this instead:

• Can’t fit in an hour-long workout? Take a 10-minute walk.
• Struggling with healthy eating? Add one serving of vegetables to your meal.
• Feeling exhausted? Go to bed 15 minutes earlier tonight.

These small steps might feel insignificant, but they aren’t. They build momentum and self-trust – the belief that you can follow through. And that’s what creates lasting success.

Why Self-Compassion Is a Health Strategy

Most women think they need more discipline. But those who stick with their health habits long-term? They practice self-compassion.

Self-compassion isn’t making excuses – it’s learning from missteps without shame.

Say you miss a workout. Instead of thinking, I failed, ask:

• What got in the way?
• Was my plan too ambitious?
• What’s a small shift I can make next time?

If your plan isn’t working, the answer isn’t to “try harder.” It’s to adjust. Maybe mornings aren’t realistic, but a lunchtime walk is. Maybe three servings of vegetables feel overwhelming, but two are doable.

Success doesn’t come from perfection. It comes from consistency. And when you stop criticizing yourself, staying consistent gets a whole lot easier.

How to Start Meeting Yourself Where You Are

If you’re tired of starting over, the answer isn’t another extreme plan. It’s creating a foundation that actually fits your life.

Step 1: Get Honest About Where You Are

Ask yourself:

• How much energy do I have for workouts?
• What does my eating look like most days?
• What feels like a stretch, and what feels impossible?

If you haven’t worked out in months, jumping straight to six days a week is a setup for frustration. If you’ve been ordering takeout most nights, expecting yourself to cook every meal from scratch won’t last.

Being honest about your starting point isn’t failure. It’s smart.

Step 2: Choose One Small, Doable Change

Instead of chasing perfection, ask: What’s one next step that feels realistic?

• Instead of an intense workout, commit to a 10-minute walk.
• Instead of counting every calorie, focus on mindful eating.
• Instead of meal-prepping for the whole week, start with one extra homemade meal.

Success comes from small, consistent actions – not big overhauls.

Step 3: Adjust as You Go

If something isn’t working, it doesn’t mean you failed. It means you’re learning.

Meeting yourself where you are isn’t about lowering your standards. It’s about creating a plan that works for your life today – so you can finally make progress that lasts.

Start Small, Start Now

If you take one thing away from the above, let it be this: You don’t have to do it all at once.

Lasting health isn’t about being perfect. It’s about meeting yourself where you are, making one small change, and staying consistent.

Ditch the guilt. Drop the “shoulds.”

• Take a short walk instead of skipping exercise entirely.
• Eat one balanced meal instead of falling into an all-or-nothing diet.
• Drink more water, get more sleep, and show yourself more kindness.

These small choices add up. But if you’re wondering where to start, I’ve made it simple for you.

Download my free 8 Basic Habits That Healthy People Do Guide and Checklist – a straightforward, actionable resource to help you build a foundation of health that actually fits your life. No extreme plans, no impossible standards – just practical steps you can take today.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you always think you should do better, exercise more, and eat healthier? Have you tried doing it all at once? Has it worked? What’s one small change you can commit to today? Let me know in the comments!

“I don’t care. I’m happy with whatever you decide.”

Nobody tasked with planning activities for a group ever wants to hear these words. But it’s the response I normally receive from my companions who suppress their own wants and desires because of my perceived status as a senior travel expert.

I’d prefer it if they voiced their ideas.

Better yet, I’d be thrilled if someone else decided to take on this monumental responsibility.

But, until one of my family members volunteers, planning our group travel activities lands on my plate, including cruise shore excursions. I’ve developed a system that makes booking these tours and activities smooth sailing, so I can move on to other dreaded tasks like making my cruise packing list.

Cruise Excursion Options

Depending on the cruise you’ve booked, you’ll have a variety of shore excursion choices. These may include:

• Walking tours with a local guide
• Multi-hour motor coach trips
• Adventure experiences like ziplining, golf or rafting
• Food and beverage tours

And you’ll have the choice of booking “official” excursions directly with your cruise operator or choosing your own tours including those promoted on third party sites like Get Your Guide, Viator or The Tour Guy.

Is it Cheaper to Book Your Own Tours?

I’ve booked independent shore excursions and cruise-offered tours. In my experience, you’ll save a few bucks booking a tour on your own. So, if you’re cruising on a budget, then you should consider this option.

Another reason to book excursions on your own is if a port experience isn’t offered by the cruise line.

If you do decide to book independent excursions, you’ll want to be extra careful about the tour times. Cruise ships will almost always wait for passengers returning late from excursions organized by the cruise line. It’s clearly stated on the reservation page for my NCL cruise, “In the event that your tour is delayed, we’ll hold the ship for you.”

Late passengers on independent excursions may be left behind.

I recently read the harrowing story about a group of cruisers christened “The Late Eight” who were stranded in Africa in March 2024. It’s an experience I never want to endure. So I’m super careful when booking cruise independent excursions.

Begin with a Worksheet

If you’ve been tasked with planning the excursions for an upcoming group cruise, take a deep breath and set up a worksheet. Use Google Sheets. It’s easy to create a simple worksheet, you can share it with your group via email and everyone has commenting abilities.

My family’s booked a June 10-day Norwegian cruise from Oslo to Stockholm with stops in nine countries. That’s right. Nine. I’m already a little worried about waking up each morning and wondering if we’re in Poland, Estonia or Latvia.

I started my worksheet by entering the days, dates, ports, arrival and departure times and duration of stay.

Do Your Research

Although you always have the option of staying onboard to take advantage of cruise ship amenities, I like to explore the port’s attractions. Figuring out what you’d like to do requires some research which, for me, is the exciting part about travel.

You can begin with guidebooks and the official tourism websites. Look for suggestions for one-day itineraries. These compressed touring schedules will include the must-sees for a destination.

Add a Things to Do column to your worksheet and list the attractions and activities you’ve discovered. This is a good time to circulate your worksheet to your group to ask them to add places they’re interested in seeing.

Check Out the Cruise Line Excursions

If your group is primarily interested in the “greatest hits” in a port, then the cruise line is most likely to offer this excursion. This is the easy peasy option for booking.

When you reserve in advance, the excursion becomes part of your official itinerary. You can always wait and book these trips while you’re onboard, but I’ve discovered they sell out or you need to wait on long lines which cut into your vacation time.

Off the Beaten Path

If the cruise line doesn’t offer the excursion you’re looking for, check out sites like Viator, Get Your Guide or The Tour Guy. I always sort my searches by highest rating and look for activities that appeal to my friends and family like:

• Docent-led museum tours
• Craft beer crawls
• Ghost and history walks
• Boat rides

Once you’ve identified all of your excursion possibilities, both official and independent, add two more columns to your worksheet – one listing links to the cruise excursions and private tours and one where your group members can mark each as a “Yes” or “No.”

Booking Tips

After you’ve finalized your choices, it’s time to book. If you’ve used a travel agent to secure your group reservation, they should be able to assist with booking cruise line excursions.

For independent tours, either suck up the booking responsibilities or assign someone else to the chore.

Final Thoughts

• Don’t forget to include transfers to and from the ship. I’ve often left these to the last minute and have found that large vans needed to accommodate my group weren’t available.
• Be very clear on when you need to be onboard for embarkation and when you will be permitted to leave the ship on departure day.
• Leave yourself a generous window of time on either side of your independent tours for unexpected fun or delays due to traffic or car problems.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you enjoy cruising? Have you organized a group cruise? Did you ever have a problem on a cruise shore excursion? Do you know someone who has?

Is there a red carpet debut with Travis soon?

Are you looking forward to reconnecting with your creative side after 60? You know that this is healthy and will do wonders to smooth out the edges of the past few years. Decades even. One favorite option is painting, but before you begin you need to make a critical choice. What medium will work best?

Watercolors?

Many of my students opt for watercolors as a friendly option for beginners. But is it friendly? In short, No. We call watercolors the master’s medium for good reason. If you have started as a beginner with watercolors you will know that water is a tricky thing to work with. It has a mind of its own.

All too often students try the ‘wash on’ approach, but instead of a lovely image of flowers, for example, blooms of cauliflowers appear and much grumbling follows.

There Is Another Way

I need to make a little confession. After a lengthy mid-career detour, I had to get back to painting full time. Despite knowing the basics of painting I found that oils were frustrating me.

The mixing of color, drying time and my limited time to paint made progress daunting. Another experienced artist suggested doing the underpainting in acrylics.

Captain Underpainting to the Rescue

An underpainting can mean an outline of the subject done with big loose shapes. Or you can go further and almost finish the painting in acrylics. Then go over the whole of it, or selected parts, in one layer of oils. This is a flexible approach that saves time, paint and tempers.

I made use of this approach for many months as I figured out my new path into full time painting. You can paint over dry acrylics with oils. Acrylics are so versatile and dry into an impermeable surface very quickly. But of course wet acrylics will not work over oils so get the sequence correct.

I seldom use underpaintings in acrylics today. But this technique is excellent for beginners.

What Other Benefits Do Acrylics Have?

Aside from quick drying acrylics are water based so you can avoid nasty solvents. For many this is a medical imperative due to skin sensitivity. The smell of solvents, such as kerosene, can be difficult to handle too. I only use this outdoors and try to keep my studio free of solvent smells.

Then there is also the costs. Beginners are spoilt for choice. Acrylics are in plentiful supply at excellent prices. Although paint quality may not be great these are still fine for students to learn with. Winsor and Newton, Maimeri and Golden all make excellent student acrylics.

Painting Surfaces

Acrylics stick to almost anything water can stick to. So watch out for your clothes and use an apron. This also means that the paint will work on card, canvas, wood and watercolor paper. Many types of multimedia can be stuck onto your painting surface and painted over with acrylics too.

Other Materials

A few synthetic brushes ranging from sizes 4-8 in the long flat variety will be enough. A round brush will be great too. These brushes, if washed properly, will last for ages. Even household brushes will work for large paintings like absract scenes. But of course do not use household acrylic paint.

beginners can avoid expensive materials with acrylic painting because the market has so many options. It is more important to focus on having fun with your painting instead of stressing over costs. Also you put those savings towards improving your painting technique.

Level Up Your Skills

Painting’s rewards come much quicker if you learn the essential painting techniques. This may seem evident. But beginners can be nervous about taking lessons in front of more experienced artists. Not to mention friends and family who may find your first efforts a little amusing. I know, we artists are a sensitive bunch.

If this sounds like you then try out online courses. There are many options both paid and free. Also you can watch YouTube videos and read books on the subject. Personally, I find books are more difficult when starting out. Watching video several times can help far quicker. Then those books make more sense.

Practice

As expected practice makes all the difference. If time is limited then make a date in your calendar and let everyone know. There is no reason to compromise your painting time to chores. Work it all in and people must respect your time. Plus keep your painting space undisturbed. Even if you paint in the corner of the lounge or bedroom. Leave your work ready for the next painting session.

Try the Beginner’s Course

Are you ready to learn a few new acrylic painting tips and tricks? I have a special on my beginners course for Sixty and Me readers.

Make a Start

Most importantly though is that you start your creative work whatever it may be. You made the promise to yourself and now it is time to fulfill that promise. Happy painting.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Have you started painting in your 60s? Have you ever experimented with acrylic paints? What has been your experience?

Many of you reading this may live well into your 80s, 90s and even beyond. None of us know how our life will unfold, though we can help maintain both our physical and mental wellbeing by taking good care of ourselves. We are born with one body, and though parts of us renew and repair, this is all we have got, and the more we look after it the better we are likely to be in old age.

It doesn’t have to be a massive life change. I am not suggesting you exercise from dawn til dusk, only eat organic healthy food (of course you can if you want), just to think about how to really care about yourself. There is no-one else out there who is going to tell you to be healthy, eat well, give your brain a workout, go for a walk in nature, learn to say ‘no’, have fun, be happy. The buck stops with you :).

Dancing

Most of us Baby Boomers loved to dance. I know I spent every evening either dancing in clubs, at parties or even in my bedroom! Never once was I an ounce overweight, and I could eat whatever I liked. So if, like me, you are no fan of the gym, ramp up that music and rock around the clock! 

Not only will dancing improve your physical health, but, especially if you sing along, it will improve your mental and emotional wellbeing. Research has shown that 1) singing reduces stress and helps promote feelings of happiness, and 2) your body releases so-called ‘happy hormones’, dopamine and serotonin while you’re doing it.

Nutrition

We wouldn’t buy a shiny new Ferrari and make it run on chip fat, so why should we treat something even more precious, any less? I know some people think that what we eat is all about weight, but the food we consume is used for energy, growth, repair, protection against illnesses and so much more. Food affects our skin, hair, bone density, even our moods, so the older we become the more thought we should put into what we eat.

Of course, many of us love to eat a few things that perhaps we shouldn’t – who can resist the smell of a delicious curry or freshly cooked chips! But in order to keep healthy, I try to do this in moderation, often by not keeping things at home that are unhealthy. That way if I really want something, I have to go and get it and usually by the time I have got to the shop, I have changed my mind. Seems to work for me. I don’t really deny myself anything but have to make the effort to go and fetch it!

Happiness

To me, one of the most important things is happiness, and though there are often things in life that are hard to get through, I always have my aim firmly at getting-back-to-happy. We all have different things that make us happy, just do whatever it is that gives you a lift and makes you smile. It could be as simple as wearing your favourite dress or perfume, meeting with friends and family, or going to that special place that you love so much.

As a bit of a butterfly, I know there are many different things that make me happy. Sometimes it is walking in the countryside, other times shopping in my favourite busy town. I love music… but also quiet, people…but also solitude, travel… but also relaxing at home. There is, however, one thing I always love and that’s being by water. I love to walk along the beach, river, canal, and even listen to rain. Just seeing or hearing it seems to fill my soul. 

Just Being You

This world is full of unique, wonderful individuals like you. However, sometimes we get put in boxes and find ourselves behaving in a certain way, often to please others, or fit in. But you have as much right to be ‘you’ as anyone else does. All your thoughts, ideas, beliefs are as valid as anyone else’s. You do not have to comply, or conform, to other people’s expectations. You have one life… live it authentically. 

So, when you reach your 80th, 90th or even your hundredth birthday and still find yourself able to dance around the kitchen and sing out loud, be grateful that 60-year-old you made the effort to give that beautiful body of yours all the love, care and attention it needed. I promise you, you will be glad you did!

Let’s Reflect:

Are you taking good care of yourself? What is the best version of you and when was she around? Do you think your 90-year-old self will be thankful to your present-day self? Why or why not?