Month: August 2025

Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce aren’t just dominating stadiums and Spotify – they’re schooling the rest of us in dating done right. Forget rom-coms, this is the real-time masterclass in modern love.

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Here’s what their high-profile romance teaches us – and how you can steal the playbook for your own dating life:

1. Shoot Your Shot (Boldly)

Travis Kelce literally made Taylor a friendship bracelet with his phone number on it.

Corny? Maybe. Effective? Definitely. He put himself out there and it worked.

Lesson: Quit overthinking your opener online. A thoughtful (even quirky) first move beats waiting around.

2. Be Each Other’s Cheerleader

Taylor’s in the VIP box at Arrowhead. Travis is flying overseas during her Eras Tour breaks. That’s showing up for each other – loudly.

Lesson: If you’re dating someone, support their passions. It’s sexy when someone claps for your wins.

3. Own the PDA (but Keep It Fun)

From on-field kisses to post-concert hugs, they’re not shy about affection. But notice – they keep it joyful, not performative.

Lesson: A little PDA signals confidence in your connection. Translation: Don’t act like your date is “just a friend” when you’re into them.

4. Balance the Spotlight

They’ve got demanding careers, yet they carve out time for each other. No “too busy” excuses here.

Lesson: If you’re really interested, you’ll find time. Period. If they don’t? That’s your answer.

5. Laugh at the Haters

The internet has opinions (shocker). Do Taylor and Travis care? Not one bit. They look like they’re having too much fun.

Lesson: People will always chirp. If you’re happy, tune out the background noise.

6. Celebrate Like It’s the Super Bowl

Every touchdown feels like a win for both. They’re not casual about celebrating love.

Lesson: Don’t be low-key about someone who makes you feel high-key amazing. Celebrate the small stuff together.

7. Play the Long Game

They’re not rushing. They’re enjoying the ride.

Lesson: Chemistry is great, but partnership is about pacing too. Date like you’re building something, not rushing to “define it” by date three.

Bottom Line

You don’t need a sold-out stadium or a #1 hit to date like Taylor and Travis. You just need courage, enthusiasm, and a partner who’s excited to be on your team.

(For my favorite Taylor concert buddy since you were 9 years old, my daughter Josie.)

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Have you followed the Taylor and Travis development? Do you think there’s something they can teach you concerning your dating habits and expectations?

Give your wardrobe a fall refresh for less.

Give your wardrobe a fall refresh for less.

Were they rushing into things too quickly?

Most women over 60 I talk to love their children deeply and want the best for them. That often means offering help, sometimes financial help, when they’re struggling. After all, what mother doesn’t want her child to feel secure?

But what happens when the giving never stops? Or when the help you’re offering feels less like a choice and more like an obligation?

There’s a name for this dynamic: financial enmeshment. It happens when money and love get so tangled up that it’s hard to tell where generosity ends and sacrifice begins.

Linda’s Story

Take “Linda,” a 67-year-old grandmother who dipped into her retirement savings to cover her son’s repeated “emergencies.” The first time, she felt proud she could step in and help. By the fourth time, she was skipping her own dental appointments, nervous about opening her mail, and second-guessing every grocery store purchase because she didn’t know when the next request would come.

She still loved her son fiercely, but she was starting to resent the situation. She felt trapped in a cycle where “help” had turned into pressure.

Linda’s story isn’t rare. Many women over 60 quietly carry similar burdens.

What Is Financial Enmeshment?

At its core, financial enmeshment means that money and relationships have become so intertwined that boundaries are blurred. It’s not just helping now and then. It’s when:

• Saying “no” feels like rejecting your child.
• You give, even when it puts your own stability at risk.
• Your child expects (or demands) financial support as a norm.
• You feel anxious, guilty, or resentful about money, but don’t see a way out.

It’s important to note: financial enmeshment doesn’t mean you don’t love your child. Quite the opposite, love is usually at the center. But when money becomes the main way love is expressed, everyone’s well-being can suffer.

Why It’s So Common Later in Life

You might wonder why this pattern often shows up for women over 60. A few reasons stand out:

Cultural Expectations

Many of us grew up hearing that “good mothers always help.” Saying no feels like breaking an unwritten rule.

Fear of Loss

Especially later in life, it’s easy to worry that setting financial boundaries could damage your relationship with your children.

Life Transitions

Divorce, widowhood, or retirement can leave women both more financially vulnerable and more emotionally available to step in “just in case.”

Guilt About the Past

If your kids grew up in tough circumstances, maybe money was scarce or life was chaotic, you might feel pressure to “make up for it” now, even at your own expense.

Put together, these factors create fertile ground for financial enmeshment.

Signs You May Be Enmeshed

How do you know if your love and money have gotten too tangled? Ask yourself these questions:

• Do I feel guilty if I spend money on myself instead of my child?
• Am I covering their bills even when I can’t comfortably cover my own?
• Do I hide the financial support I give because I know others wouldn’t approve?
• Do I feel anxious, resentful, or drained after helping?

If you answered yes to more than one, it may be a sign of enmeshment.

The Hidden Costs of Enmeshment

Financial enmeshment doesn’t just impact your bank account. It takes a toll in other ways:

• Stress and anxiety: Constantly worrying about requests erodes peace of mind.
• Health sacrifices: Skipping medical care or essentials to keep helping.
• Relationship strain: Resentment builds beneath the surface.
• Reduced independence: Your own goals, travel, hobbies, a comfortable retirement, get put on hold.

The cost isn’t just financial, it’s emotional and relational.

Untangling Love and Money

The good news is that enmeshment isn’t permanent. You can love your children while also protecting your financial well-being. Here are a few tools to help:

Pause Before Responding

When a request comes in, take a breath. Give yourself at least 24 hours before committing. This small pause shifts you from reaction to reflection.

Check Your Capacity

Ask yourself: “Can I do this without harming my own security?” If the answer is no, that’s enough reason to decline.

Name the Feeling

Is your urge to give driven by love, guilt, fear, or habit? Simply naming the feeling can loosen its grip and open space for choice.

Offer Alternatives

Sometimes support doesn’t have to be financial. Listening, babysitting, sharing a meal, or brainstorming solutions can be even more valuable.

Start with One Boundary

You don’t have to cut everything off at once. Begin with a single clear limit, like “I’ll help with groceries this month, but not rent.”

What Healthy Boundaries Look Like

Boundaries don’t mean shutting the door on your children. They mean creating clarity and safety for everyone involved. Healthy financial boundaries:

• Allow you to give from a place of love, not fear.
• Protect your retirement, health, and independence.
• Model resilience and responsibility for your children.
• Keep relationships from being dominated by money.

Imagine how freeing it would feel to say yes when you truly want to, and no when you need to, without guilt.

A New Chapter of Connection

Many women discover that when they step back from over-giving, their relationships actually improve. Without the constant undercurrent of money, there’s more room for connection, honesty, and shared responsibility.

As one client told me after setting her first boundary: “I was terrified my daughter would be angry. Instead, she said, ‘Thank you, Mom. I needed to hear that.’”

Closing Thoughts

If you’ve found yourself giving more than you can comfortably afford, you’re not alone. Many women in their 60s and beyond face the same tangle of love, obligation, and money.

The good news is that with awareness and small, consistent changes, you can begin to reclaim your financial confidence without cutting off the love and connection you want with your family.

Also read, When Not to Give Money to Family.

Want to learn more about financial enmeshment and how to protect your well-being while staying connected to your family? Read more here.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Would you describe your relationship with your adult children to be free from financial obligation? Or have you become financially enmeshed?