Month: September 2025

Style Stealers

!function(d,s,id){
var e, p = /^http:/.test(d.location) ? ‘http’ : ‘https’;
if(!d.getElementById(id)) {
e = d.createElement(s);
e.id = id;
e.src = p + ‘://widgets.rewardstyle.com/js/shopthepost.js’;
d.body.appendChild(e);
}
if(typeof window.__stp === ‘object’) if(d.readyState === ‘complete’) {
window.__stp.init();
}
}(document, ‘script’, ‘shopthepost-script’);

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

Originally posted at: Kiki Barth’s Red Tie Front Turtleneck Dress

Click Here for Additional Stock in Her Skirt / Click Here for More / And Click Here for More

Style Stealers

!function(d,s,id){
var e, p = /^http:/.test(d.location) ? ‘http’ : ‘https’;
if(!d.getElementById(id)) {
e = d.createElement(s);
e.id = id;
e.src = p + ‘://widgets.rewardstyle.com/js/shopthepost.js’;
d.body.appendChild(e);
}
if(typeof window.__stp === ‘object’) if(d.readyState === ‘complete’) {
window.__stp.init();
}
}(document, ‘script’, ‘shopthepost-script’);

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

Originally posted at: Emily Simpson’s Black Leather Skirt and Top

Have you noticed that everything you do, say, think, feel, eat, drink, and breathe affects your energy and hence, your health?

When I left Santa Barbara and a successful professional life as a trauma therapist, I was burnt out. Why? I had gotten into habits that depleted my energy. Even though I was a trauma therapist and had all the tools, too many of life’s challenges had piled up. I had a father with Alzheimer’s disease, a sister with a mental illness (living on the street or in a hospital) and a mother who was becoming more and more depressed, and I was still working full time!

I tried to help my family, but after a while my tank was empty.

How Do We Recover from Burnout?

My story has a happy ending. I found a way to live the life of my dreams. In Buenos Aires I danced tango and healed. My energy came back.

The truth is, I had succumbed to too much pressure. It can be a slow path to heal. I truly believe we can all change in ways that serve us better.

Let me follow with an excerpt from my book on reinvention, Creating Magic in Midlife (and beyond).

Everything we listen to, every environment we live in, every place we visit or walk through, every sunset, sunrise, and bird song, the movies we watch, our children’s laugh­ter and tears, all affect how we feel. How we feel will cre­ate a sense of well-being, or maybe we’ll feel depleted or have lower energy. If you want higher energy, choose more consciously. We can choose what kind of energy we have.

Is Choice Possible and Why Be More Conscious?

We can and are meant to digest life’s experiences, like we digest and metabolize our food. If we don’t, things pile up inside.

What if we don’t do that? It is a fact that stuck or undi­gested experiences can create problems in our body/mind. We don’t want to be cluttered with thoughts and feelings. By being more aware of our responses to life’s experiences, metabolizing as we go, we can enjoy a sense of well-being most of the time.

Can You Be More Aware of Holding Your Breath? Can You Accept Your Feelings?

You can start where you are. Take a breathing break every hour or so and check in with your body. Relax your shoulders. That may be enough to be more present and start to relax.

We can take time to feel and experience events on an emotional and energetic level. We can feel touched, annoyed, pressured. We have thoughts about what happens. Taking time to review our desires can create a new feeling of aliveness. On the other hand, rushing and feeling pressured makes us feel out of sorts. Imagine a ball filling with air. Eventually, it will reach the point where it bursts.

Ask yourself, do you process your day’s experiences? Do you hold on to reactions from the day? Maybe someone you know, or even you, keeps too much locked away. Don’t be the balloon! Exploring your reactions to life’s experiences can help you from exploding!

I believe, contrary to popular belief, joy and aliveness are not just about feeling good. They are about feeling what you feel, experiencing what you experience, letting things affect you, and then moving on.

Let’s Reflect:

How do you digest life? How can you remove pressure and take more time for yourself?

Style Stealers

!function(d,s,id){
var e, p = /^http:/.test(d.location) ? ‘http’ : ‘https’;
if(!d.getElementById(id)) {
e = d.createElement(s);
e.id = id;
e.src = p + ‘://widgets.rewardstyle.com/js/shopthepost.js’;
d.body.appendChild(e);
}
if(typeof window.__stp === ‘object’) if(d.readyState === ‘complete’) {
window.__stp.init();
}
}(document, ‘script’, ‘shopthepost-script’);

Turn on your JavaScript to view content

Originally posted at: Alexia Echevarria’s Leopard and Lace Look

I just turned 65. Which means I now qualify for senior discounts, mammogram reminders in a slightly larger font, and (if society has its way) an invisibility cloak for women of my age. But I’m not wearing it. Nor buying into society’s ageist nonsense.

The truth is: I’m happier now than I’ve ever been.

After all, I’ve learned a lot from six and a half decades. Sure, I’ve got regrets. But sometimes regret is just a breadcrumb trail to a better, happier life.

With this in mind, I’ve decided to share a curated list of 65 of my regrets. But this list isn’t about shame. It’s about pride in my growth. It’s about holding up each regret boldly to the light and saying: “Thank you for all you taught me!”

Read on and let me know in the comments if you find any of your own regrets hiding in my list. 

65 Regrets from my 65 Years of Life… So Far 

1. I regret pretending to like jazz for that man who didn’t like women. 
2. I regret shaving my arms in eighth grade because someone said they looked “like a boy’s.”
3. I regret saying “yes” when what I really meant was, “I’m afraid if I say no, you’ll stop loving me.”
4. I regret ironing. Every time.
5. I regret buying “nude” lipstick that looked like I’d just crawled out of the grave.
6. I regret spending entire relationships explaining myself. What was I? A user manual?
7. I regret not asking for my grandmother’s recipe. And not writing down the story she told while she stirred the sauce.
8. I regret not yelling “I’m not done yet” at least once in a boardroom while I worked in advertising.
9. I regret laughing at jokes that hurt me, because I wanted to be the kind of woman who “could take it.”
10. I regret not keeping the pink cashmere sweater with the hole in the sleeve. It fit my heart perfectly.
11. I regret not laughing during sex more often. It was funny at times. It really was.
12. I regret thinking I needed to fix people. I can’t even fix the ice maker in my freezer.
13. I regret the dinner parties where I smiled too much and chewed too little. Yes, people smiled back. But I often left starving.
14. I regret trying to “find myself” in overpriced retreats instead of low-lit diners with friends.
15. I regret wasting time trying to understand people who clearly didn’t understand themselves.
16. I regret every moment I mistook numbness for peace.
17. I regret never buying that antique chair I saw in New Hope, Pennsylvania. It was completely impractical. Like joy.
18. I regret deleting the photos where I didn’t look pretty. Those were often the days I laughed the hardest.
19. I regret thinking “strong” meant “silent.”
20. I regret mistaking self-deprecation for humility.
21. I regret trying to “look effortless.” It took so much effort.
22. I regret all the times I mistook urgency for love. (Ditto on mistaking endurance for love.)
23. I regret not taking better notes when I was happiest.
24. I regret the time I gave a second chance to that man who barely deserved the first.
25. I regret not keeping a notebook titled: “Things That Didn’t Go as Planned But Ended Up Being Better.”
26. I regret deleting my angry emails. They were badly punctuated but emotionally correct. I’d love to reread them now.
27. I regret the plants I overwatered and the men I under-loved.
28. I regret not whispering to more people: “This is hard, right? Just being alive like this?”
29. I regret every time I didn’t order fries because someone was watching.
30. I regret how long it took to realize that saying “I’m tired” often meant “I’m sad.”
31. I regret not telling her I knew she was lying. I would’ve lost our friendship either way.
32. I regret how many apologies I began with “I know this sounds crazy, but…”
33. I regret not asking what kind of music my dad liked when he was seventeen.
34. I regret thinking I needed a flat stomach to be taken seriously. Like yes, this is my résumé, but how many crunches have I done?
35. I regret not speaking up to that one woman at work who said, “You’re so brave for not wearing makeup.”
36. I regret not loving people the way they wanted, because I was too busy loving them the way I wanted.
37. I regret eating too many salads I didn’t like with too many men I didn’t like.
38. I regret not realizing sooner that “being low-maintenance” was code for “Please don’t need anything.”
39. I regret thinking I had to be grateful for crumbs. When I could’ve just baked my own damn cake.
40. I regret not celebrating more tiny wins.
41. I regret confusing people-pleasing with kindness.
42. I regret burying my sadness under busy schedules and to-do lists, until it came back louder, angrier, and harder to ignore.
43. I regret not asking more questions at the doctor’s office. And not firing the ones who didn’t take me seriously.
44. I regret outsourcing my intuition to experts, books, and well-meaning strangers.
45. I regret the years I thought thinness was a prerequisite for joy. (Thinness never bought happiness. It just bought pants that didn’t fit the next year.)
46. I regret trying to be useful when what I really wanted was to be loved.
47. I regret saying “I’m fine” so often I started gaslighting myself.
48. I regret all the shoes I bought that doubled as medieval torture devices.
49. I regret not buying the inflatable T-Rex costume when it was on sale. That version of me was clearly trying to live.
50. I regret not screenshotting more compliments and fewer dumb arguments. 
51. I regret all the meals I ate quickly, standing up, with the TV on.
52. I regret not charging more. For my time. My work. My presence. My emotional labor. (Looking at you, guy I dated in my 30s.)
53. I regret giving up on hobbies because I wasn’t instantly amazing at them.
54. I regret spending 40+ years trying to be chosen, when I should’ve been just choosing myself. 
55. I regret waiting until rock bottom to finally admit I needed help. (Turns out, you can ask for directions before you’re lost.) 
56. I regret giving away the green mixing bowl that still smelled faintly of garlic no matter how many times I washed it.
57. I regret not learning how to take a compliment without treating it like a hot potato made of lies.
58. I regret spending two decades trying to be “the cool, thin girl” when in fact all I was being was hungry for food and validation while wearing overpriced designer clothes.
59. I regret not saying “I don’t want to” more often. It’s a complete sentence. And wildly satisfying.
60. I regret every time I Googled a symptom and convinced myself I had six hours to live. 
61. I regret confusing “he’s busy” with “he doesn’t give a shit.” 
62. I regret not wearing more hats. Like, literal hats. And possibly metaphorical ones. But mostly fedoras.
63. I regret thinking I had to become someone to be loved. I always was someone.
64. I regret how long it took to realize that “difficult” women are simply just honest women.
65. I regret waiting until 65 to truly like myself. But hey… what a nice surprise.

So, those are my 65 regrets at age 65. And I wouldn’t trade them for anything. Because they led me to who I am today.

Oh… and… for more reflections on regret, joy, aging, living a meaningful life, you can find me at YourToDieForLife.com

Now It’s Your Turn:  

What’s one regret (or more) you carry? Drop it in the comments. You never know… naming it might be the first step toward forgiving it.