Month: November 2025

What happened?

We used to read 300-page novels and fall asleep to the shipping forecast. Now we’re told that our attention spans are shrinking, that we can’t handle more than a ten-second reel on our phones. And yet my own phone cheerfully reports two to four hours of screen time a day. We binge entire box sets in a weekend but lament that we can’t finish a novel. So, have we really become goldfish with Wi-Fi – or is something far more interesting going on?

Behavioural thinker Rory Sutherland calls this a trend-and-counter-trend moment. While everyone insists that attention is collapsing, the evidence suggests otherwise. Look at the rise of long-form podcasts: Steven Bartlett’s Diary of a CEO, Joe Rogan’s three-hour marathons, Mel Robbins’s deep-dive interviews. None are afraid to take their time, and millions of listeners happily go with them. Far from running out of focus, we’ve become better at choosing where to spend it.

We Have the Choice in Our Hands

As Rory points out, our old idea of “normal” attention was never natural to begin with. TV dramas lasted 50 minutes not because that’s how long we could concentrate but because they had to fit between the adverts. Now we can set the pace ourselves. The same person who skips a three-minute online clip will devour 10 episodes of Breaking Bad without blinking. It isn’t that we’ve split into two tribes – the long-formers and the scrollers. It’s the same person, the same brain, selecting different speeds of engagement, like choosing music for the gym or the bath.

And here’s the part the data rarely captures. Women in their 60s and beyond – Sixty and Me readers among them – aren’t struggling with fading attention. We’re living in a world that too easily mistakes selectivity for decline. The desire to slow down and go deep isn’t a symptom of ageing; it’s a privilege of perspective. When the twin pressures of career and family ease, time itself opens up – time to feed our curiosity, to learn, to think, to savour. By midlife we’ve become connoisseurs of attention: we know what deserves it.

So when a woman chooses to learn something new – to give an hour of her day to thought, conversation, or the beauty of another language – she isn’t indulging a hobby. She’s making a quiet declaration: that her curiosity still burns bright, that her mind still hungers for complexity, that long sentences and layered ideas remain pleasures worth keeping. Our attention hasn’t gone. It has simply grown discerning.

The Long and the Short of It

Once you start looking for it, this rhythm of short and long runs through everything we do. A quick scroll through the headlines before breakfast, then an hour lost in the garden or a good conversation after dinner. A short burst of focus to check the bills, then a long read that pulls you in completely. We’re not losing attention – we’re learning to manage its temperature.

I see this every day in my work at The French Room, an online space I founded for adults who want to learn French at their own rhythm. Some learners pop in for a brief moment of focus – 10 minutes of fresh vocabulary or a small win that keeps their French alive between other things. Others linger for longer sessions, where ideas link, laughter builds, and an hour seems to dissolve. The short moments are nimble, practical, and satisfying – like a quick espresso for the brain. But it’s the longer stretches that bring nourishment, the kind that lingers afterwards.

When we slow down enough to think, talk, or learn without interruption, the brain settles. We stop hopping from one thought to another and start joining the dots. That’s when learning stops feeling like a task and starts feeling like discovery. You can almost sense the mind exhale.

When Focus Feels Like Flight

There’s a point, when you’re absorbed in something you love, where focus stops feeling like effort. It becomes its own reward. Time loosens; thought sharpens. You look up and realise an hour has passed, and yet you feel clearer, not drained.

I’ve watched this happen in countless French classes at The French Room. It’s the moment when people stop rehearsing what to say and simply start speaking. The tension drops from their shoulders, laughter starts to ripple, and they forget to be nervous. It’s what psychologists call flow, but to me it looks more like joy – a feeling of being utterly present, connected, and awake.

After years of living in fast-forward, that kind of focus feels almost medicinal. It steadies you. It’s the opposite of the scattered buzz we get from constant notifications. Focus, at its best, is nourishing. It gives something back.

What’s interesting is how this kind of deep attention also feeds confidence. Once you’ve felt it, you stop apologising for wanting it. You stop mistaking stillness for idleness. You begin to see focus as a kind of freedom – the right to be absorbed, to care, to go deep again.

The Case for Horsepower Learning

Rory Sutherland once said that while the modern world worships efficiency, human beings thrive on meaning. After more than 10,000 hours of teaching adults, I’ve found the same to be true. The moments that really move people – in language, in life – are rarely the most efficient ones. They’re the meandering, fully engaged ones. The ones that look a little messy from the outside but leave everyone feeling more alive inside.

We’ve been trained to think that faster is better: quick results, instant feedback, everything at a tap. But real understanding takes friction – the good kind. The kind that slows you down enough to connect ideas and make them yours. That’s where the horsepower lies. Not the racing kind, but the kind that pulls weight and makes steady progress.

I sometimes call it beautiful inefficiency: the time spent finding the right word, laughing at mistakes, chasing digressions that turn out to matter. None of it is wasted. Apps are designed for speed; people are designed for depth. When you give yourself permission to take your time, learning doesn’t just happen – it takes root.

Why Depth Feeds the Mind

There’s a lovely paradox at the heart of all this. The more time we give to something, the more time seems to expand. When we focus deeply, the clock behaves differently. It stops feeling like a deadline and starts feeling like an invitation.

That’s why depth has always been linked to joy. You feel it in a great conversation, in a book that grips you, in learning something that lights up a forgotten corner of the mind. It’s the same quiet satisfaction that comes from walking instead of driving – you see more, notice more, remember more.

Anyone who’s ever lost themselves in something knows that focus feeds happiness. It sharpens memory, lifts mood, and leaves the mind steadier afterwards. In later life, when time feels both precious and elastic, that kind of engagement becomes one of the most rewarding forms of self-care we have.

These moments of deep engagement are what I’ve built my teaching life around at The French Room – not lessons in the traditional sense, but spaces for connection, curiosity and the pleasure of thinking in another language.

And perhaps that’s the real story about attention. It was never about how long we could focus – it’s about what feels worth focusing on. Our attention hasn’t gone anywhere; it’s simply grown wiser, more discerning, more beautifully our own.

Reader Reflections:

When was the last time you gave something your full attention – and felt restored by it? Where in your life do you still crave the pleasure of depth?

What happened?

Photo: @kristincavallari

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Originally posted at: Kristin Cavallari’s Black Leather Bomber Jacket

When my mother was 75, she went in for her regular eye exam expecting the usual: stronger lenses, thicker glasses, and another reminder that this was “just part of aging.”

Instead, her doctor blinked in surprise – her prescription actually needed to be lowered. Her eyes had grown stronger.

I wasn’t all that surprised. She’d been following a natural eye-health program I created for her that focused on nourishment, detoxification, and circulation. It reminded me how incredibly resilient the body can be when we give it the right support.

Our Body Is Strong and Interconnected

Even in my own life, I’ve noticed the same connection. After traveling – especially in Italy, with all those delicious sweets and glasses of red wine – I often come home with more floaters. It’s no mystery why. In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the eyes and the liver are connected. When the liver becomes sluggish from too much sugar or alcohol, the eyes reveal it first.

As a mom, I also saw nature’s healing power in action. When my children were young and developed pink eye, I used a few drops of Silver Shield several times a day. Within 48 hours, the infection cleared completely – no harsh chemicals needed.

Stories like these illustrate what modern science continues to affirm: the eyes are not isolated organs. They are living, responsive tissue deeply connected to the health of your entire body.

Common Eye Issues We Encounter

By our 50s and 60s, oxidative stress, hormonal shifts, and nutrient deficiencies can contribute to common eye issues such as:

Macular Degeneration

Now affecting one in eight adults over 60, macular degeneration is often linked to oxidative damage and reduced blood flow to the retina. Nutrients such as lutein, zeaxanthin, zinc, and vitamin C can slow progression.

Cataracts

Cataracts is caused by protein oxidation and accumulation. Antioxidants like vitamin E, alpha-lipoic acid, and glutathione support clearer lenses.

Dry Eyes

If you experience dry eyes, this is a common symptom of dehydration, low omega-3 intake, or declining estrogen levels.

Floaters

Floaters can indicate liver stagnation and toxin buildup.

The good news: your eyes are among the most responsive organs in your body when it comes to natural care.

9 Natural Ways to Support Your Eyes – The Wise Woman’s Way

1. Feed Your Eyes from the Inside Out

Your eyes are hungry for color – especially the deep blues, purples, and greens found in nature. Blueberries and bilberries strengthen capillaries and protect retinal tissue. Lutein and zeaxanthin, found in kale, spinach, and egg yolks, act like internal sunglasses, filtering harmful light and improving visual acuity. Think of every colorful plate as nourishment for your vision.

2. Love Your Liver (Your Eyes’ Silent Partner)

In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the eyes reflect liver health. Dullness, dryness, or floaters may be signs your liver needs attention. Support it daily with lemon water, milk thistle, dandelion tea, and leafy greens. Reducing processed foods and alcohol gives your liver – and your eyes – room to thrive. A clear liver creates clear vision.

3. Hydrate for Clarity and Comfort

The eyes rely on a thin, water-rich tear film for lubrication. Even mild dehydration can lead to blurred vision and irritation. Sip water throughout the day and include hydrating foods such as cucumber, oranges, and berries. Herbal teas like chamomile or nettle soothe the body and restore moisture. Hydration is a simple but powerful form of eye care.

4. Rest and Refocus

Our eyes were designed to shift between near and far vision – not to stare at glowing screens all day. Every 30 minutes, close your eyes for 30 seconds and take three slow breaths. Then look out a window into the distance and soften your gaze. This gentle “refocus” relaxes the tiny muscles that strain from close-up work. Stillness restores sharpness.

5. Move Your Body, Feed Your Eyes

Healthy circulation ensures oxygen and nutrients reach the retina and optic nerve. Movement is medicine – brisk walking, yoga, and even gentle stretching can improve blood flow to the eyes. When you move your body, you also move energy, which clears stagnation and brings vitality to your vision.

6. Add Healthy Fats for Moisture and Glow

Dry eyes are often a sign of essential fatty acid deficiency. Omega-3s from flax, chia, or fish oil nourish the tear film and reduce inflammation. Include wild-caught salmon, walnuts, or a high-quality supplement daily. These same fats also benefit brain, skin, and hormone health – a trifecta of vitality for women over 50.

7. Guard Against Oxidative Stress

Oxidative stress accelerates aging in every organ, including your eyes. Counter it with antioxidants – vitamins C and E, selenium, zinc, and colorful plant compounds. Focus on vibrant foods: berries, pomegranate, sweet potatoes, and leafy greens. Limiting processed foods and alcohol adds even more protection.

8. Be Light Wise

Light nourishes and challenges the eyes. Spend time outdoors in natural light daily to regulate circadian rhythms and stimulate retinal function. In the evening, reduce screen brightness and use blue-light filters to protect from digital eye strain. Outdoors, always wear sunglasses with UV protection to safeguard delicate tissues.

9. See with Your Heart

Your eyes don’t just perceive the world; they reflect how you see life itself. Stress, sadness, or constant tension can literally tighten eye muscles and narrow perspective. Gentle meditation, laughter, and gratitude soften your vision and expand your awareness. When you see through a lens of compassion, everything becomes clearer – inside and out.

A Clearer Future

Our eyes are storytellers. They reveal the health of our body, the light of our spirit, and the beauty of what we allow ourselves to see.

With mindful nourishment, movement, and natural care, it’s possible to protect – and even improve – your vision at any age.

To help you begin, I’ve created a free guide: “7 Supplements That Support Your Eyes Naturally.”

Inside, you’ll discover the best nutrients for sharper vision, improved circulation, and long-term eye protection.

Let’s Have a Confirmation:

Have you noticed weaker eyesight lately? What natural remedies have you tried? What supplements do you use for eye health?