Mental baggage comes in all shapes and sizes – it can be in relation to excess weight, low self-esteem, dysfunctional relationships, depression, anxiety – the options are endless. We all think we should have life sorted by the time we get to 60, but in reality, this is seldom the case.
Life
happens – and keeps on happening relentlessly! We finally emerge at 60 or 70,
sometimes a bit battered and bruised and wondering where all the years went but
with a somewhat uneasy sense that all is possibly not well with our world.
Women are
particularly guilty of spending the majority of their time making sure that
everyone else’s needs are met before they collapse in a weary heap without
giving any thought to their own unmet needs, vanishing aspirations or
resolutions of past trauma.
The Mind Holds It All
It is well-established
knowledge that the majority of our beliefs are embedded in our subconscious in
early childhood. When these beliefs are shaped by adverse childhood events –
perceived or real (the mind can’t tell the difference) – the outcomes can be devastating.
Our
thoughts shape our beliefs and then our beliefs shape us. Adverse childhood
events range from the apparently minor incidents of sibling rivalry to divorce
and imagined or real neglect to domestic violence, physical or sexual abuse and
even conflict in the environment outside the home.
Research shows
that adverse
events can predispose us to contract serious illnesses
in later life and even lead to an early death. There is a distinct correlation.
Time to Take a Long, Hard Look
So now
that you have the time to take stock, make sure that you don’t ignore your
baggage any longer. It really doesn’t make any sense to keep hauling it around
so that it can blight your later years as well.
Assess your
load – now is not the time for pretending everything is perfect, unless it
truly is –
and decide to do something about it.
Find the Cause – Your Subconscious Knows What It Is
Sometimes
we are aware of the possible causes of the issues in our lives, but some
memories may be buried by our subconscious because they are interpreted as too
painful or damaging.
Together
with my clients, I am constantly surprised, when taking them back to review
adverse events, that the root cause of an issue can be completely different to
what they thought it was.
Excess
weight is a perfect example – it’s seldom to do with food. However, once you
understand the actual origin of an issue, you can get rid of it forever. This
is a crucial step and sometimes hypnotherapy
may be a good approach.
Learn to Love Yourself
Finally,
you need to consider how you treat yourself. Make a conscious effort to become
your own best friend. Instead of belittling and abusing yourself as we tend to
do, make a determined effort to deal with yourself kindly and compassionately.
Your mind
acts according to your instructions so make sure you send the right messages.
Fortunately,
neuroplasticity
(the creation of new neural pathways in the brain) is possible even at our age
and beyond, so you can rewire your mind to revert to its original programming
where you were strong and confident – and completely enough.
Further read, HOW TO JOURNAL A NEW LOVE STORY FOR YOURSELF AFTER 60.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
What
does your mental baggage consist of? Do you have a good opinion of yourself, or
do you think critically of yourself? What ways have you tried to get rid of
your baggage? Have they worked? Please share your thoughts below.
