Community is the heart of everything as we age, and it’s important to become engrained in one before loneliness and isolation lead us down the wrong path.
In her July 2023 Psychology Today article, Samantha Stein PsyD described the myriad ways community is important for human beings. In addition to providing belonging, support and identity, she wrote, community also reduces stress and isolation.
Without it, we are putting our lives at risk, plain and simple.
What the Studies Say
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, social isolation and loneliness put people – especially older adults – at risk for heart disease and stroke, Type 2 diabetes, depression and anxiety, addiction, suicidality and self-harm, dementia and earlier death. The CDC estimates loneliness costs the US economy around $406 billion a year, in addition to the estimated $6.7 billion a year in Medicare costs for socially isolated older adults. It’s an expense that affects all of us!
Not only does establishing community extend and enhance our lives, but it also makes us happier and more content as we age. The 80-year Harvard Study of Adult Development indicates that community and the relationships that define it are the top inputs in predicting a happy, healthy life. This factor is more important than what we eat, what we do for a living, and what we own.
“Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, the study revealed. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes,” a 2017 Harvard Gazette piece explained.
This is an important finding that should influence the way we think about and plan for our second half.
So how do we get connected to our people and the tribe that will sustain us in our Golden Years? The good news is we don’t have to look far and wide. Community is practically at our front door; we just have to look for it, step into it, and dedicate ourselves to the process. Here are a few suggestions for building community that lasts.
Reconnect with Family and Longtime Friends
In many, if not most, cases, family is the foundation of our community. So look for ways to get a little closer to your relatives or friends that have been like family (framily). That may mean moving to a home that is nearer to these special folks, or dedicating yourself to more frequent trips and visits.
It’s easier to connect with and provide assistance to people in your community when you’re living close by, so consider proximity when you’re thinking about where you will live as you age. Also, decide to build tighter relationships with family and friends who already live nearby. It’s never too late to bring people back into your fold and make your family circles tighter, stronger and more mutually beneficial.
Commit to Attend Spiritual Events
Make a commitment to attend worship services, activities and small group opportunities at a nearby church or faith organization. These communities are by nature loving and supportive of their members. By mission, they are dedicated to community service and filling needs and most importantly, providing folks with a sense of purpose, selflessness and gratitude. Places of worship check so many boxes in the realms of community. Plus, people will notice when you’re missing and keep tabs on your well-being!
Decide to Live in a Multifamily, Walkable or Connected-by-Design Community
As you age, you will encounter unexpected challenges such as immobility, driving restrictions and physical impairment and these may limit your ability to have relationships with other people. Deciding ahead of time that you will live in a home that is within walking distance of the services and vendors you utilize on a daily basis will help mitigate these challenges.
These residences may be manageable single-family homes in close proximity to retail centers or multifamily condominiums, townhomes or apartments that afford residents access to shared resources, amenities and social gatherings. They may or may not be assisted or independent living arrangements, but make sure to investigate those types of residences.
The number one reason older adults move to retirement communities, continued care communities, active senior adult neighborhoods and the like is to be part of, you guessed it, community.
Dedicate Yourself to a Volunteer Effort, Hobby or Activity That Fuels Your Passion
Whether you like to mountain bike, run, knit, cook or support causes close to your heart, community is in the very fabric of these pursuits.
Perhaps there’s a running group that you can meet up with several times a week for a light jog? Maybe there are sewing circles that make blankets for children in the nearby hospital? Is there an organization in which you can take a board, volunteer or leadership role? Any interest will lead you to a core group that can provide sustaining relationships that can bring new color into your life.
Explore more ideas in our Hobbies section.
Join a Social, Fitness, or Special Interest Club
This option may involve fees and annual dues, but it will be money well spent. Clubs of any kind focus on fraternity and relationship building, so they are a perfect place to develop new friendships. Many revolve around fitness and outdoor activities like golf, tennis, pickleball, sailing, and exercise, so clubs provide endless opportunities to enhance your health and wellness!
Let’s Have a Conversation:
How are you building community in your life today? Do you think it’s important to have friends and family in close proximity? What resources have you discovered on your journey?
