I’m sure you’ve heard about the body positivity movement that’s been all the rage for the past few years. There are many women, especially social media influencers, who feel that it’s appropriate and acceptable to promote wearing whatever you want as long as you feel confident and love what you’re wearing regardless of body size.
Many women who support body positivity are heavier and may traditionally be viewed as unhealthy. However, they tend to debate the possibility that they are unhealthy because of body size.
Thus, there are many women, usually on the thinner side, who think it’s encouraging the world to accept fat as healthy.
And of course I have thoughts…
An Alternative to Body Positivity
Rather than debate the issue, I’ve chosen to delineate the two trains of thought. As a result, these are some of my thoughts:
You Choose What Works for You
I trust that individuals who believe in body positivity are able to practice the associated beliefs and it’s not my business. It is my opinion that people have a right to believe what they want to believe, wear what they want to wear, and I’m not going to judge.
I Choose What Works for Me
As someone who has been overweight most of my life, I personally know of the health risks, but I’m not going to judge your health. Instead, I’m going to focus on the body neutrality mindset and my health. That allows me to think about all the wonderful ways my body works for me while I also try to get healthier.
These two trains of thought let you be you, and me be me. And it’s without the need to argue, fight, or put others down.
We can all accept and have respect for our bodies in different ways.
Now Let’s Learn about Body Neutrality
Body neutrality focuses on respecting the body’s functions and capabilities rather than its appearance, viewing the body as a vessel for living life.
Key aspects include:
- shifting focus away from self-worth that’s based on appearance.
- practicing self-compassion and grace without the need to be a (traditional) beauty queen.
- promoting healthy living habits for your overall well-being.
- providing an alternative to body positivity by being more accessible for those who struggle with unconditional self-love, or for women dealing with chronic illness or body shame.
Key Principles of Body Neutrality for Aging Women
Body neutrality is perfect for aging women since we experience frequent changes in our bodies. Sometimes these changes are hard to accept. Learning to love yourself during menopausal years and beyond can be challenging – think about those saggy breasts and floppy batwings, not to mention weight gain and dry skin.
So, let’s look at the core principles of body neutrality for aging women and see how we can apply them during our grown-up years:
Focus on Function Over Form
Appreciate what your body can do, such as walking, breathing, or digesting, instead of how it looks.
Detach Self-Worth
Recognize that your value is not tied to your physical appearance. This mindset shift will allow you to have a neutral stance on your body image.
Realistic Self-Appreciation
It’s okay not to love every part of your body; the goal is to be respectful and not self-critical.
Acceptance of Change
Acknowledge that bodies naturally change over time and that this is normal, rather than viewing it as a negative.
How Body Neutrality is Going to Help You in Your Grown-up Years
How do you like that I keep calling these our “grown-up years?” I’ll share more about this in a separate article, but my daddy used to tell me I finally sounded like I was “growing up” … when I got into my 50s and 60s! He was a funny man! He found it hard to think of my sister and me as adults even as he approached 90!
Anyway, back to the topic at hand.
If you adopt a mindset of body neutrality, you’ll be able to worry less and celebrate more as you begin to develop improved body confidence. These are 10 examples of changes you’ll notice in your attitude toward your body:
- You’ll be able to celebrate what your body can do for you rather than what you can no longer do because of your body.
- You’ll learn to exercise because it feels good and provides you with energy, not because you feel pressured to achieve a certain look.
- You’ll be able to practice mindful movement such as yoga, tai chi, and stretching to calm your mind and body rather than to keep up with trends.
- You’ll learn to be more patient and compassionate with yourself because you genuinely trust that it’s normal for your body to change, especially as you age.
- You’ll begin to prioritize your well-being by focusing on being healthy and nourishing your body with a balanced diet instead of focusing only on appearance.
- You’ll be able to challenge negative thoughts about your body because you know your body is doing amazing things for you.
- You’ll be able to choose clothes that fit well and make you feel comfortable without worrying about a size label.
- You’ll be able to practice mindful consumption by curating your social media feed to reduce exposure to unrealistic beauty standards.
- You’ll be able to connect with positive people who love and accept you for who you are, not for how you look.
- You’ll send a quiet, positive message to those around you that physical appearance is not connected to a person’s worth and it’s only a small part of who they are!
Psychologist Susan Albers with the Cleveland Clinic encourages women to make peace with their bodies.
“Body neutrality is a middle-of-the-road approach between body positivity and body negativity,” says Dr. Albers. “As the term suggests, it is neither loving nor hating your body. It’s based on the notions of acceptance and having respect for one’s body rather than love.”
I think this is an excellent summary of the body neutrality mindset. If you want to talk more about it, reach me at susan@sassysisterstuff.com.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
How have you felt about your body in the past? As you have aged, have your feelings changed? Would you say your current mindset about your body draws on the principles of body neutrality or something else? What are your thoughts about body positivity vs body neutrality? Have you participated in any conversations about this topic? Please leave your thoughts in the comments. I’d love to hear from you!
