Divorce can be a traumatic experience for both parties involved. Not only does it entail the end of a relationship, but it also requires dividing assets and agreeing on living arrangements, among other things.
8 Common Dirty Tricks During Divorce
Unfortunately, some spouses use dirty tricks during a divorce to gain an advantage. If you’re going through a divorce, here are some common tricks to watch out for and how to avoid them.
Hiding Money
Everyone worries that their spouse is hiding money. The best way to avoid this dirty trick is to hire a forensic accountant to analyze your financial records and look for evidence of missing money. If you find evidence, bring it up in a joint collaborative session so you can resolve the issue.
Spying on You
There are several ways a spouse can spy on you. They can hack your computer or smartphone, hire a private detective, or install a “keystroke program” on your computer. There are two ways to thwart this tactic. Never put anything compromising on your computer and have your equipment checked by a technician.
Limiting Access to Money
Another favorite dirty trick is to drain the joint bank accounts and place common funds in a separate account. Many jurisdictions have standing orders limiting behavior. To avoid the problems, withdraw half the common funds and place the money in a separate account.
Stripping the House
Some spouses move everything out of the house before they file for divorce. This may feel really good, but will make your spouse angry and set up a reimbursement claim for the personal property you took. You will end up with stuff you don’t want and have less cash.
Cancelling the Credit Cards
If you don’t have your own credit cards, but rely on being a signatory on your spouse’s credit cards, he/she can cancel them and leave you out in the cold. To avoid this problem, take out credit cards in your own name prior to filing for divorce so you won’t be left without credit when you need it. This will also help you to establish credit if you haven’t already.
Cancelling the Utilities
A common dirty divorce trick is to ask the utility companies to shut off water, electricity, phone, and TV before leaving the home. This is annoying, childish, and easy to fix. To avoid the problem, call the utility companies and warn them that you are in the middle of a divorce and ask them not to turn off the utilities without checking first.
Monopolizing the Top Attorneys in Town
In every county, there are only a handful of really first-rate divorce attorneys. If your spouse makes appointments with all of them and spends an hour sharing confidential information, you won’t be able to hire any of these top attorneys to help with his/her divorce. To avoid this problem, call some top attorneys at the first sign of marital trouble and make an appointment with two or three.
Running Up Debts
Just before they file for divorce, your spouse might go on a shopping spree and buy new clothes, that sports car he always wanted, or a special piece of jewelry for his paramour. The debt will be a common liability, but the buyer can keep the property because it belongs to them personally.
Other debts to watch out for are unusual tax bills. A spouse can make decisions to cash in retirement accounts and/or note report income that could create a huge tax liability that you might be responsible in part for.
Use These Tips to Protect Yourself in Divorce
So, what can you do to protect yourself? Here are some tips:
Get Everything in Writing
Verbal agreements are not legally binding, and they can be easily manipulated or misinterpreted. Whenever possible, get everything in writing, including agreements about property division, custody arrangements, and support payments. This will help prevent any misunderstandings or disputes down the road.
Keep Emotions in Check
Divorce is an emotional time, but it’s crucial to keep your emotions in check during negotiations and discussions. Don’t let anger or hurt feelings cloud your judgment or lead you to make decisions that are not in your best interest. Take a step back and try to approach the situation with a clear head.
Work with a Skilled Divorce Team
According to a well-known attorney, mediator and podcast host, Susan Guthrie, Esq. says, “the first person you should call when you decide to get divorced is a divorce coach. The divorce coach can help you evaluate what type of divorce is best for you, educate you to the divorce process, help you work through your emotions, and help you decide on which of the various divorce professionals you should have on your team and prepare you with interview questions.”
Guthrie also says, “the next two professionals on your team should be a certified divorce financial analyst (CDFA) and an experienced divorce attorney.”
Having these skilled and experienced professionals on your side can help you navigate the complex process and avoid common tricks. This team works together to help you reduce the time and cost of your divorce, and to help you make the best decisions for yourself in the short and long term.
Don’t Make Big Decisions Too Quickly
It’s easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment and make big decisions without fully thinking them through. Avoid making any major decisions until you’ve had time to think about them carefully and consult with your attorney. Rushing into decisions can lead to regret and financial consequences.
Divorce is a difficult process, but it doesn’t have to be made worse by dirty tricks. It’s important to note that the majority of divorces do not involve tricks like these, but by being aware of these tactics, and taking steps to protect yourself, you can avoid these problems and make the process go as smoothly as possible so you may move forward to a new and vibrant life.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
Have you been through a divorce? What dirty schemes did you endure from your ex-spouse? How did you combat them?
