Who is the feisty you in 15-20 years? As we journey through life, it’s natural to reflect on our past and ponder the future. For those of us who are approaching or have surpassed 60, we sometimes overlook the extent of the number of years ahead of us. The next 20-25 years (or more!) offer a canvas brimming with possibilities and certainly marked by more than one live phase if we live it fully.
I sometimes hear women even younger than 60 describe themselves as “old” and that the most important part of life has been lived. In reality, 60 is considered by researchers to be the end of middle age. If we look at life as a three-part book, we have all the chapters of part 3 yet to write.
Instead of focusing on what we have done and who we were, what about relishing who we have become and what is ahead? Let’s take a look at the rich phases of life we lived during our “middle age,” in order to appreciate the breadth of possibilities in the years ahead.
Reflecting on the Past
How did you rock your life from 35 to 60? For many of us, this period is filled with a myriad of experiences, changes, and growth. It’s a time of both planned endeavors and unexpected twists, all of which have shaped who we are today.
Take a moment to think about the significant events in your mid-life. Write them down if it helps. As I reflected on my mid-life decades, I realized how diverse our personas can be over just 25 years. At 31, I embarked on a professional career at a telecom company, making the appropriate relocations and position changes.
At 40, I got married and soon after, began my doctoral studies. Five years later, at 45, I lost my career position but rebounded by starting my own business. At 50, I navigated a divorce and rediscovered myself as an independent woman. In my mid-50s, I received a serendipitous call to help start an MBA program, thus embracing my role as a professor for the next 15 years.
Your life, too, has been a rich tapestry of experiences. Appreciate all the roles you’ve played and the person you have become.
Embracing the Future
Now, it’s time to look ahead. What new adventures and identities await you? Who will you be at 80 or 90? It’s important to step away from ageist perceptions and embrace the array of opportunities before you.
More and more of us are achieving new milestones in our 60s, 70s, 80s, and even 90s. We’re earning degrees, writing books, making a difference in our communities, honing our creativity, exploring new talents, and finding innovative ways to stay engaged in life. Remember, 60-65 is now considered the end of middle age, not old age. You become old when you think you are.
Detach yourself from ageist notions and outdated stereotypes. Focus on those who are thriving in their later years, living vibrant and fulfilling lives. What do you envision for your future?
I invite you to not assume that you already know what the future will be. If you are anything like me, sometimes what we think a satisfying life looks like turns out to not be satisfying at all! What if you pause to explore possibilities, rather than accept stereotypes of what 65, 75, or 85 “should” look like?
Let ideas bubble up:
- What did you want to do when you were 12?
- What do you see others do that intrigues you, yet you think, “I can’t do that.”?
- What have you considered learning or doing, but your busy life didn’t have the bandwidth?
- What are you doing when you feel fulfilled and happy? How can you get more of that?
- What if you were 35 and could recreate your life? What would you do? Why not now?
The point is to let yourself notice and listen to your voice inside that often gets sidelined by assumptions about aging and familiarity with the status quo.
Cultivating an Inspired Life
As you contemplate the natural momentum of your life, think about what lies ahead. Imagine yourself at 85. What possibilities inspire you? What makes your heart sing?
I see myself still out hiking, traveling, and supporting older women as they realize the fullness of who they are in their seventh, eighth and ninth decades of life. I’m going to be bolder about my writing too! This vision makes me smile inside and out.
What visions for yourself make you smile? Hold onto these images and let them guide you.
Living life to the fullest doesn’t mean ignoring our mortality or denying the physical realities of aging. It means cultivating a hopeful heart and the resilience to embrace each day with energy, happiness, and fulfillment.
The key is to fill your life with meaning and joy. Embrace the richness of every phase of life and remember that delightful years are yet to come. You can download a self-assessment that introduces you to the three key areas associated with happiness and vitality as we age from my website. Here’s to thriving and living inspired lives well beyond 60!
Let’s Reflect:
Share your vision for your life in 10-20 years. What internal talk wants to hold you back? What do you tell yourself instead? How do you feel when you see yourself living your happy and full life in the years to come?
