Month: March 2020

How Creativity Helped This Amazing Woman to Move from Illness to Wellness

How Creativity Helped This Amazing Woman to Move from Illness to Wellness

Guests who stay at La Belle Vie B & B and Wellness Studio often say they never want to leave. I’m not surprised after chatting with their hostess, Josée Velsen, who exudes warmth, gratitude, and a joy of living.

She and her young family moved from one
small island to another 17 years ago, while she was in her early 30s and
healing from breast cancer.

Josée says, along with chemo and radiation, many alternative healing modalities came
to her – including Ayurveda, Chinese and herbal medicine. Nuns and a Buddhist
monk came to pray for her, and she still uses the prayer mala beads he gave
her.

Unable to cook, and with two young
children, she was grateful when gifts of food arrived at her doorstep. Always
interested in wellness, she was open to receiving treatments from healing hands
and hearing there were prayer circles and sweat lodges held in her honour.

The family endured hard times and deep
pain. It was a long journey with many lessons. Spending time in nature fed her
healing process. This deepened her connection with nature and her soul.

A big lesson for Josée was being open
to receiving help. For her, giving had always been easier. She took in all the
love that was given and knew that “one day, it would be [her] turn to give comfort
to someone in need.”

A Healing Journey and Daily Routine

Josée starts every day saying, “Yes, to receiving joy.” Their family mantra is, “We’re so lucky and blessed.” They have been saying and singing this together since her children were born. They always close by saying, “Thank you.”

Pedro
and Cookies & Cream, her roosters, wake her up. Josée then sips a cup of
chai tea while being watched by Albert and Noel – her pet Alpacas. They stand
and gaze at her until she is lured out to visit with them. They communicate via
humming. The chickens then rush out to greet her.

Josée says
it’s a treat to collect her own eggs and to communicate with her animals.

When friends sold to Josée’s family
two acres of land at an affordable price, it made the dream of building their
own “healthy home” possible.

A small house in a garden

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Her husband, Adam, used materials that
didn’t contain volatile compounds, and their home is even wired differently.
It’s a welcoming space to live in.

Herbalist teachers taught Josée to identify the herbs in her own backyard. In the magical time of spring, her world explodes with vitality. She harvests stinging nettles, Oregon grape, lemon balm, mint, raspberry leaf, and calendula to create her own teas, tinctures, facial masks, and healing salves.

After their children grew up and left
home, she and Adam opened their extra bedrooms as a restful B & B where
visitors can help harvest herbs, gather eggs from the chickens, or visit with
their two alpacas.

Josée invites guests to join her in
her morning meditation and chi gong practice and leads guests on walks to
gather herbs to create their own custom tea blends. Women have come to just
rest while on their own healing journey.

It is both a hobby farm as well as a B
& B for body, mind, and soul. Josée practices Ayurveda, a 5000-year-old healing modality from India. She believes this
is a lifestyle we can bring into our lives with routines that nourish our constitution.

She has continued to study
over the past 19 years and loves to share the teachings with others in her
workshops and retreats at her home on Gabriola Island.

Wellness as a Creative Path

Josée says: “Creativity is fundamental to who I am. It’s part of my every day. It was put on the shelf for a while when I had kids – but even then I had a Juice Bar out of an old boat trailer Adam reinvented. I sold what I called Grabby Abby – fresh ginger and apple juice along with wheatgrass shots.”

Creativity and curiosity are vivid
inside her, and the natural world that surrounds her gives her courage and
inspiration to continue on her creative path of wellness. She shares her
natural ways with others and feels blessed to wake up every morning.

Her goal is to “express joy, peace,
and possibilities through her creative voice,” and to “support people in their
own beauty.”

Leading workshops was a creative risk
for Josée because she’s shy. It was a risk she took because she really wanted
to share what had worked in her healing journey.

She cites a quote from Rumi as something
that inspires her: “Let the beauty you love be what you do. There are a hundred
ways to kneel and kiss the ground.”

Creativity as a Spiritual Practice

Josée
expresses her spirituality through her creativity. There’s a definite
connection between the two for her because it taps into who she is and takes
her to a deeper place. It helps her get to know herself at a deeper level.

Sometimes it
can be lonely working alone, and it can be hard to stop the creative flow and
rest as ideas are always flowing. A big plus, however, is that every day is
different. She likes variety and to have space for magic to happen.

Her best ideas come to her
when she’s out in nature. She likes to take her meditation practice beyond the
yoga mat, and often sits by the sea, watching and listening to life.

Living an island
life is all about creativity. It’s a chance to become something new. It’s not
unusual to cobble together more than one source of income.

Advice for Others

Josée thinks creativity is a huge
teacher, and she urges everyone to jump right in and welcome it. “Feel it with
all of your senses. Have fun. It’s all about play and being curious and not
afraid to make mistakes. Allow creativity to guide you. It’s part of our life
journey and our lesson.”

We don’t control our creativity, but
we can choose to take a risk and follow it. If it doesn’t work the first time,
we can get back up and try again. “Creativity is in everyone and it’s important
for all of us to connect with it. It has the power to transform a blah day into
magic – like catching raindrops on your tongue. It’s more about play than it is
serious.”

How have you used your own creativity
to reinvent your life? Is creativity a spiritual practice for you? Please share
how you have used your creativity and let’s have a conversation!

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The Art of Giving a Eulogy – Share the Best Stories and Get Personal About It

The Art of Giving a Eulogy – Share the Best Stories and Get Personal About It

Over my long career as a funeral director I’ve heard more than my fair share of eulogies. In a sense, eulogies are like taking a scenic drive through a life.

There are times the
view seems so familiar, and other times when one may be struck by the beauty in
front of them; beauty that they were not expecting to see, or never noticed
before.

Such was the case
in 2013, when I heard what was to become my favorite eulogy. It was given by
the then mayor of New York City, Michael Bloomberg, for the city’s former
mayor, Edward I. Koch.

Bloomberg was on
top of his game that day as he stood on the bimah of Manhattan’s venerable
Temple Emanu-El and addressed a filled-to-capacity crowd with warmth and humor.
Bloomberg remembered Koch as New York City’s “quintessential mayor” and spoke
of Koch’s extensive career as a public official, his love for the city of New
York, and his contributions to its safety and wellbeing.

The crowd laughed
as Bloomberg recounted incidents from Koch’s colorful past, such as the time
Koch stood at the entrance ramp to the Queensboro Bridge, recently re-named for
him, yelling, “Welcome to my bridge!” to approaching cars.

Koch being Koch, he stood in the freezing cold for another
20 minutes, even after the cameras stopped rolling, shouting out the
welcome. Bloomberg also traced Koch’s life as a lawyer, author, and
television personality after his three-term mayoralty came to an end.

But the most moving
moment came when Bloomberg underscored Koch’s pride in his faith. Bloomberg
recited the words that, at Koch’s request, would be etched into his tombstone: My
father is Jewish, my mother is Jewish, I am Jewish.” They were the last words
spoken by slain journalist Daniel Pearl.

Markedly less
impressive was the eulogy that followed, presented by former United States
President Bill Clinton. To the discomfited looks of many, Clinton shared a
correspondence he once had with Koch about Viagra. If, indeed, eulogies are a
roadmap for life, Clinton’s comments had many wondering, “How did we get here?”

True Words

The word eulogy
derives from classical Greek and means “true words.” In ancient Greece it was
customary that men of “approved wisdom and eminent reputation” be selected to
eulogize the dead.

Fittingly, it was
Pericles, who, in 431 B.C., eulogized the Athenian soldiers who lost their
lives in the Peloponnesian War. Today, it is usually a colleague, close friend,
or family member who is given the honor.

Eulogies have been
the subject of three books by author Cyrus M. Copeland, who was inspired to
explore the subject after giving one for his late father, an experience he
describes as cathartic.

His first book, Farewell, Godspeed: The Greatest Eulogies of Our Time, includes the eulogies of such diverse individuals as Martin Luther King, Henry Ford, Andrew Carnegie, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Karl Marx.

It also contains
the eulogy Madonna gave for fashion designer Gianni Versace in 1997. Madonna
captured the attention of the audience with her very first words: “I slept in
Gianni Versace’s bed.”

Like me, Copeland has a favorite eulogy. It was the one given by the late writer Pat Conroy for his father Colonel Donald Conroy, a.k.a., the movie character “The Great Santini,” and it appears in Copeland’s second book, A Wonderful Life: 50 Eulogies to Lift the Spirit.

“I’ve read hundreds
of farewells and studied the art form. Conroy’s was a master class in
remembrance,” said Copeland. “He tells stories, he is honest, he
finds the bigger themes of his father’s life, he makes us laugh.”

And laugh is what I and hundreds of others did during the eulogy
given last spring at the funeral of Queens County’s longest-serving district
attorney, Richard Brown. Brown’s son-in-law, Bruce Foodman, shared a
recollection about how intimidated he felt when he first married into the
family of the eminent justice.

He was not sure how
to address his formidable new father- in-law. Brown, sensing his discomfort,
assured him that “Richard is fine.” Puzzled, and thinking someone had been
ill, Foodman responded by asking who Richard was.

It’s Not About You

Unlike Foodman’s
humorously self-effacing recollection, some speakers can’t help but talk about
themselves, instead of focusing on the deceased. We have likely all sat through
eulogies listening to speakers share how smart, attractive, accomplished, etc.
the deceased thought they were.

Writer Larry
Gelbart, who created the iconic television show M*A*S*H, wrote the forward for
Copeland’s, A Wonderful Life, cautioning
us to resist the temptation to make the eulogy about ourselves:

“A eulogy is not
meant to be a vehicle for self-aggrandizement. Try pressing the shift key as
little as possible when typing the letter i.

Still, Copeland says that “it’s not a mistake to get personal – just as long as it ties into the themes of the deceased’s life. This
is what distinguishes a eulogy from an obit – the personal imprint
they left on the person behind the microphone.” 

Getting personal is
just what Dominick Yezzo, an administrative judge in New York City, did when he
gave a eulogy for his late brother, James, this past January.

“Having been
privileged to know him at the beginning and very end of his life, I connected
myself to him intimately and removed myself to talk about him,” said Yezzo, who
views the giving of eulogies as being “holy” and having a “sacred base.”

Yezzo, speaking on
behalf of his large family, wanted to “let everyone know who his brother was.”
So, when preparing the eulogy, he was mindful of incorporating aspects of his
brother’s life that everyone could understand and relate to, including his
Catholic school education and lifelong devotion to the New York Yankees.

Writing a Meaningful Eulogy

“A good eulogy should have at least one good story,” says
Copeland. And for maximum impact, Copeland suggests relating a
“recognizable truth.” “This,” he writes, “is what binds us together, and
connects the eulogized to the dearly departed in a meaningful fashion.”

A stirring example
of this was a recent eulogy I heard by a young woman who spoke about her father
by telling the mourners, “My father made me feel loved, special, and secure,
each and every day of my life.”

In Copeland’s third, and most recent book, Passwords: 7 Steps to Writing a Memorable Eulogy, he shares ideas to serve as the foundation for the making of a great eulogy. He uses Conroy’s eulogy for his father as an example: “… begin memorably, tell stories, tell the truth, get personal, find a big moment, and end strongly.”

Copeland, who often travels around the country to speak at
conventions on the art of eulogizing, has a succinct answer to the question of
why we need eulogies.

As he put it in Passwords, “A great eulogy assures us
that our loved ones will endure in our collective memories. The more specific
and real the remembrances, the stronger the bridge.”

Have you given a
eulogy? For whom? How did you go about the task? What did you share? What was
the reaction from those who attended? Please share any tips from your personal
experience.

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Real Housewives Of New York Season 12 Fashion Preview

Real Housewives Of New York Season 12 Fashion Preview

Considering the fact that you’re all probably bored out of your minds being stuck inside right now (unless you’re in the midst of a good RHONY binge sesh which of course never gets old), you’ll be happy to learn that we have a little treat in store for you: we’ve decided to release Season 12 early. Welllll the fashion items that we could find from the trailers at least (unfortunately I think only Andy has that power and needs to use it ASAP), which should definitely make counting down the days until April 2nd when you can hopefully leave your house stay home to watch these housewives in action a bit more bearable.

Fashionably,

Faryn

 

Leah McSweeney’s Black Ruched Dress

Leah McSweeney's Black Ruched Dress

Click Here to Shop Her Norma Kamali Dress

Click Here For Additional Stock

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Leah McSweeney’s Neon Yellow Dress

Leah McSweeney's Neon Yellow Dress

Click Here to See Her Sold Out Bardot Dress

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Leah McSweeney’s Grey Cutout Turtleneck

Leah McSweeney's Grey Cutout Turtleneck

Click Here to Shop Her Alix NYC Bodysuit

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Leah McSweeney’s Green Knotted Bikini

Leah McSweeney's Green Knotted Bikini

Click Here to See Her Sold Out Frankies Bikini Top

Click Here to Shop the Bottoms

Info: @LeahMob

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Leah McSweeney’s Floral Skirt

Leah McSweeney's Floral Skirt

Click Here to Shop Her PatBO Skirt on Sale in Limited Sizing

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Tinsley Mortimer’s Red Puff Sleeve Romper

Tinsley Mortimer's Red Puff Sleeve Romper

Click Here to See her Sold Out Alexis Romper

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Tinsley Mortimer’s Floral Puff Sleeve Dress

Tinsley Mortimer’s Floral Puff Sleeve Dress

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Tinsley Mortimer’s Black and White Lace Dress

Tinsley Mortimer's Black and White Lace Dress

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Tinsley Mortimer’s Green Blouse

Tinsley Mortimer's Green Blouse

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Tinsley Mortimer’s Chain Link Hoop Earrings

Tinsley Mortimer's Chain Link Earrings

Click Here to Shop her Jennifer Zeuner Earrings

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Dorinda Medley’s White and Blue Sequin Blazer

Dorinda Medley's White and Blue Sequin Blazer

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Ramona Singer’s Red Wrap Dress

Ramona Singer's Red Wrap Dress

Click Here to Shop Her Ronny Kobo Dress in Limited Sizing

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Sonja Morgan’s Snake Print Top

Sonja Morgan's Snake Print Top

Click Here to Shop Her Sonja by Sonja Morgan Top (part of a two piece set)

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Luann de Lesseps’ Embellished Bird Bomber Jacket

Luann de Lesseps' Embellished Bird Bomber Jacket

Click Here to See Her Sold Out Jovani Jacket

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Originally posted at: Real Housewives Of New York Season 12 Fashion Preview

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3 Pointers to What You CAN Control Around Coronavirus

3 Pointers to What You CAN Control Around Coronavirus

All of a sudden, it seems that coronavirus has come closer much more swiftly than we thought it would. However, although we may not have any control over when, where, or how the coronavirus will be in our area, we DO have control over how we meet that circumstance.

We CAN take care of our fear-based thoughts; we CAN identify our worst fears; and we CAN
prepare ourselves practically.

What Are You Actually Afraid of?

When there is so much fear around
coronavirus, I can’t help but wonder what we are actually afraid of.  

Are you afraid of getting coronavirus
and dying yourself? Are you afraid of getting COVID-19, surviving, but passing
it on to someone else who then dies? Are you afraid of one of your loved family
members dying? Or are you more afraid of social unrest and other disruptions to
life as we know it?

Whatever way you look at it, this is
about fear of death, whether death of our bodies, our way of doing things, or
our societal norms.

Here are 3 things you CAN be in
control of(over and above the practical recommendations of social
distancing, hygiene, etc).

Your Thoughts

You are the only one in charge of
your thoughts. I know it doesn’t feel like it sometimes! It really helps though
to admit to yourself what kinds of thoughts you are having. If they are
fear-based thoughts, then try the 5-Minute Flip exercise.

Let yourself go fully into the
emotions associated with those fear thoughts. For example: “I’m scared X will
die.” Really let those thoughts run riot – but only for five minutes. (This is
important; you need to set the timer). Notice your thoughts, notice your
feelings, notice your body sensations. Let them be there.

When the timer rings, move to another
location; even another chair in the same room will do. Now deliberately turn
your thoughts away from what you were thinking about in the previous five
minutes, and spend the next five thinking of things you love and appreciate.

This might take quite a bit of
effort, but it really works if you’re determined not to let the fear-based
thoughts take over.

This exercise works simply because
allowing the fear-based thoughts and feelings to run their course makes them
surface –
and that’s what you want. It is the resistance to them that causes the trouble.
As many wise sages say, it is the resistance to circumstances that causes
suffering.

Your End-of-Life Preparation

In the last few decades, we in the
Western world have been very loath to talk about death, or anything resembling
it.

But now, we have to. Because
otherwise we will have people dying who didn’t want to, people being kept alive
who, quite frankly, would rather have died, and many, many people who are just
completely unprepared, whether it is them that die, a family member, or a
friend.

By preparation I mean discussion (and
documentation of that discussion) about the terms of your will, what you
ideally would like at the end of life (e.g., to stay at home, be in a hospice,
stay in your care home, or be in hospital – assuming all those options are
available).

Would you want a DNR (do not
resuscitate) order? To be intubated in the case of breathing difficulties? To
just be kept comfortable and pain-free, rather than receive treatment?

You need to discuss this with your
family or friends and write down the results of that discussion. Include
details about what you would want for your funeral, so it can be a chance of
letting go properly, of grieving fully, by those coming after you.

This
is so important, it is worth repeating: Although you may not have any control
over when, where, or how the coronavirus will come in your area, you DO have
control over how you meet it.

You CAN manage your fearful thoughts; you CAN face up to the
fear of dying; and you CAN prepare yourself practically.

The Finding of Positives

In any situation, no matter how
awful, there are positives to be found. You may not want to find them
(understandable, especially with death) but the fact is they are there.

When my husband died of cancer, I was
aware, albeit in a rather detached way, of the gratitude I felt toward the many
friends who rallied round. I even found myself being grateful for the sunshine
and good weather, although I would have preferred my husband to be alive and
healthy and it be raining!

After my parents both died in the
same week, I learnt to be grateful for the strong bonds that my siblings and I
created through regular Zoom calls – we had had no need of them when my mum was
the central hub through which all family information was shared.

So you might want to accept the fact that
you MIGHT go to your reward sooner than you thought, and choose to prepare well
for the inevitable now.

If you find yourself having to
self-isolate as a result of coronavirus threats, to work from home, or have
your normal routine disrupted, choose to face up to preparing your own end-of-life
plan (and/or help someone else plan theirs) – not because you necessarily think
death will happen, but because it might happen (and anyway, one day, it
definitely will). That’s one positive that could come out of this situation.

Use my free ebook 8 Essentials For Creating A Good End of Life Plan as a tool to get aware of just some of the things that need to be taken care of.  

What is your strategy for fighting the coronavirus? Are you in self-isolation mode? Have you prepared for an eventual early end of life? What did you do to prepare? Please share with our community!

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Hannah Ann Sluss’ White Cropped Hoodie

Hannah Ann Sluss’ White Cropped Hoodie on Instastories

The Bachelor Instagram Fashion 2020

Considering we’re stuck at home and there’s barely anything good on TV right now, we’re super grateful to Hannah Ann Sluss for providing us with some premium content on her Instastories like TikTok videos and this video of her eating ice cream in a super cute white cropped hoodie sweatshirt. Which is honestly just the inspiration we need right now to stock up on more cute, comfy outfits that we totally wouldn’t be embarrassed for people to see us wear in public our homes on Instagram.

Fashionably,

Faryn

 

Hannah Ann Sluss’ White Cropped Hoodie

Click Here to Shop Her Alo Hoodie on Sale in Limited Sizing and in Other Colours

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Photo & Info: @HannahAnn

Originally posted at: Hannah Ann Sluss’ White Cropped Hoodie

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