Here’s the thing about fitness information: It changes constantly. New research, trends, and fads steer us in directions we believe will be The Answer to whatever fitness problem ails us.

Belly fat? Use the Belly Blaster 2000!

Jiggly thighs? Do leg lifts for four hours a day!

Underarm wiggle? Try Wiggle Away!

One day we’re squeezing the life out of our ThighMaster, the next day we’re kickin’ it to Tae Bo. Now we wear tech that inspires us to walk around the bed 100 times before going to sleep just to rack up those 10,000 steps.

It’s easier to buy bigger clothes and forget the whole thing versus trying to decipher all the claims we stumble upon daily. How do you know what and who to believe? Where to turn?

It would be nice to have one neat little answer presented to us in a pretty box with a nice bow on top (one of those fancy, drapery-type cloth ones, not the cheap drugstore versions).

If only.

So let’s wade through the noise, shall we?

Here are a few solid, research-proven facts from the book Strength Training Past 50 by Wayne Westcott and Thomas R. Baechle:

Muscle Loss

We naturally lose 5 to 10 lbs. of muscle per decade after 50. 80% of women and men over 50 have too little muscle and too much fat. (Yikes!)

Muscle Helps Metabolism

Muscle keeps our metabolism stoked because it burns many more calories at rest. Without strength training you can expect a 3% drop in metabolism per decade, which adds up to an average of 15 lb. weight gain per decade or more. Sound familiar?

It’s Reversible!

Here’s the good news: You can reverse this loss of muscle with even a small amount of strength training. If you are currently weight training, pat yourself on the back (not too hard though, or you risk tearing a rotator cuff).

If not, fear not! You can start today on the road to a better metabolism, stronger muscles and overall better life. For reals.

With this in mind, here are my top rules to get started and achieve the best results from any strength training program, based on the mistakes I see most often.

Use the Right Amount of Resistance

If you’re striving for muscle ‘tone,’ you need to build muscle. Don’t worry though, you’re not going to look like a WWE wrestler. No wrestler ever got massive biceps from curling 5-lb. dumbbells, I assure you.

Here’s the thing: You can’t tone fat, which leaves you with… muscle!

So, you need to work the muscle to a point where it has a reason to change. You do this by challenging it beyond it’s normal everyday exertion.

For example, as you read these words, pick up a pen, pencil, whatever you have around you, and start doing biceps curls with it. Keep going for the next five minutes.

Sounds ridiculous, right?

That’s essentially the same thing you’re doing when you use too light weight. You can go on forever and will never see results. You’ll eventually tire out from muscle fatigue – it may even ‘burn’ from lactic acid buildup, but that muscle will not be stimulated enough to wake up and shape up.

The bottom line is, you have to pick a weight that enables you to do 12 to 15 repetitions, where the last three of them are tough. If you can jump right into another set, it’s not heavy enough.

Note: When you first start doing resistance training you’ll notice your strength increases quickly in the beginning, but that will eventually level off.

Work Every Muscle, Not Just Your Favorites

As much as we’d all love to have flat abs, doing crunches without watching your diet and without exercising every other muscle won’t do it. You need a total body workout, not just abs and triceps, for example.

Be sure to include exercises for legs, glutes, core, chest, back, biceps, triceps and shoulders. Ignoring any muscle group sets you up for imbalances and possible injury.

Use a Full Range of Motion

Learn the proper way to do an exercise and be sure to use a full range of motion. That ensures you’re working the length of the entire muscle. It’s different if you need to modify a move due to an injury, arthritis or a doctor’s recommendation, of course.

Use Your Core in Every Exercise

All movements start from the core. Your core includes everything that connects your upper body to your lower body. Needless to say, it’s pretty important. Whether you’re doing an arm exercise, leg or shoulder move, first engage your core.

This does not mean ‘sucking in’ your stomach. Instead, imagine someone about bracing your ab muscles as if you’re about to try and bounce a coin off of them.

Another way to focus on the core is by trying to draw your bellybutton in towards your spine, but without holding your breath in the process.

Keeping these muscles engaged not only works your core throughout your workout, but it also protects your spine. It’s really a win-win.

Big to Small Rule

Start with big muscle groups and work your way down to smaller ones. This isn’t a hard and fast rule if you’re just starting out, but it gets more important as you get stronger.

Smaller muscles support the bigger ones. For instance, if you tire out your triceps, you may need to lower the resistance when doing your chest exercises since your triceps stabilize and support the main chest muscles.

Ditto for biceps and back muscles; they work together.

Aim for two to three workouts a week, on non-consecutive days, one set of each exercise to start and work up to two to three sets when time allows.

Do you do strength training? What do you use – tubing, dumbbells, kettlebells, machines or your own body weight? Please share your routine below!

I see a lot of ads offering things like a ‘14-day weight loss challenge’ or ‘21-day health restart’ this time of year. Do you?

Many people will sign up for them. I have done them myself in years past. I have also created and offered them in my health coaching business before. I even considered offering one this year because they are so appealing. But then I remembered – they don’t work.

A “restart” or “jumpstart” sounds so beneficial and inspiring. It seems like the answer to our problems. We think, “I can do anything for 14 days,” or, “This will get me started.”

While those thoughts may be true, the reality is that these short-term programs rarely lead to long-term change. These programs share the same problem as setting goals – the “finish line,” the built-in stopping point to the new actions.

What Can We Do for Weight Loss or Other Health Improvements?

I think one of the most valuable things you can do is to learn how to create a successful plan for yourself. Having no plan at all doesn’t usually work, you probably don’t need an explanation or convincing of that. You may be living without any kind of plan right now. How is that going?

Flexibility Is Key

Creating too strict a plan usually ends up not working any better than no plan at all. ‘Challenge’ types of programs are often way more restrictive than how someone would be willing to live their daily life. There has to be a certain amount of flexibility in any plan before it can become a lifestyle.

Only you know how flexible or strict your plan should be to make sure you will adhere to it. I love to see my clients be successful with a very flexible plan that is in some way improving their health. You can always tighten up or add to your plan at a gradual pace to ensure that you will always be willing to do it.

Your Rally Cry!

When we start these ‘restarts’ or ‘challenges’ we are excited and want to shout, “Let’s go, let’s do this hard thing!” as we embark. This excited, fired up motivation, burns hot but soon flames out. It is hard to sustain that kind of enthusiasm for very long.

I think our rally cry should be more like, “Okay, I can do this. It is totally doable.” It may not seem as thrilling, but it is much more useful for your long-term motivation.

Sustainability

Over the years, I have had so many clients ask me, “Should I do the ____ (popular at the moment) diet plan?” Some of the plans are healthy and beneficial but my answer was always, and still is, “Don’t do anything that you are not willing to do for the rest of your life.”

What is the point: lose some weight, stop doing the plan, and gain it back again? This is such a waste of your time and energy, and not great for your body OR mind.

“Keep It Between the Navigational Beacons, Between the Buoys”

I think I am quoting a Jimmy Buffet song here, but I like it. Besides making sure that your plan has enough flexibility to be sustainable, it also needs some guidelines, some buoys to keep you on course. These guidelines can include things like food or drink limits.

An example could be maximum number of alcoholic drinks or desserts in a week. The beacons could be minimum baselines for your activity. Like establishing a minimum number of times or minutes per week of exercise. You could set a minimum number of times you cook at home per week, or maximum number of meals you get out.

Remember to make your guidelines doable. This is not a challenge or a diet or a program. This is how you plan to live your life.

Don’t Forget Compassion and Patience for Yourself

Remember that even though you have set up a flexible, doable plan, you probably won’t be perfect, especially at first. Don’t immediately ditch the plan or change it. Give it a little time before you decide if it is doable for you or not.

You may have done a short-term program that led to permanent changes in the past. If so, yay! The majority of people that I have worked with find that sooner or later they have to establish a sustainable lifestyle plan that works for them. Creating the right plan for you can take a little trial and error, but it is worth it because it creates permanent change.

If you want some help developing your flexible, sustainable plan for health, you can get my planning worksheet here.

Have you done any short-term weight loss challenges? How was your experience? What did you gain or learn from doing them? Will you do a challenge again? Please share with our community!

When did you have your last good laugh? As we leave 2020 behind with all its tribulations, let’s ring in the new year with a bit of laughter.

For all cultures, laughing has been a way to make it through hard times. Last March, Sixty and Me published a great blog about laughing, “3 Fun Ways to Combat Coronavirus with Laughter.” As we begin 2021, I thought it was time to revisit the topic of laughter.

The Psychology Today article “Laughter is the Best Medicine” describes a plethora of research that demonstrates how laughter can reduce pain and improve the oxygen flow to your brain and heart. For people with diabetes, laughter has been found to increase glucose tolerance.

Upside Down World

Shared laughter can increase synchronization between the brains of speaker and listener. Humor also eases emotional pain. That is why people turn to humor in times like these. On New Year’s Eve, a friend sent me an email with the subject line “Goodbye 2020.” Have you heard any of these?

• I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
• The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house, and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
• Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money!

Funny Bone

Did you know that gorillas laugh? They like to be tickled. I guess that is what is meant by having a funny bone. There are many examples on YouTube. This laughing gorilla was my favorite because something that happened struck him or her as hilarious.

Children have a funny bone too. When I taught first grade, we always created a class joke book. They shared their favorite jokes like “What did one wave say to the other? The answer ‘Nothing, they just waved.’” Their sense of humor was so sweet.

Writing About Laughter

This week the theme in my writing group was laughter. The members each wrote stories about laughter in their lives. One woman shared the funny refrigerator magnets that she and her friend exchanged as gifts.

Another shared home-made comics, sent daily to her by a friend who is actually a software engineer. And yet another said that when she needed a laugh, she would open YouTube and watch the Funniest Home Videos.

The Laughing Record

When it was my turn to share, I wrote about a recent discovery I made when exploring family history. My Great Uncle Otto began OKEH records, named after himself, Otto K. E. Heinemann, in the early 1900s.

His record company became famous for releasing the Laughing Record, recorded in 1920, shortly after the end of World War I. It featured nothing but opera singers laughing along with a cornet solo. The record became an instant hit, selling over a million copies.

It was said to be a precursor to laugh tracks we hear on sitcoms. When I heard it on YouTube, I rolled my eyes as I usually do with laugh tracks. But as I listened, I could not stop myself from laughing. Listen here:

Daily Sources of Laughter

These days my daily dose of laughter comes from two places. First, my dogs are so funny when they compete to sit beside me on our couch. Mango, my little bulldog, known for being slow, uncharacteristically comes running to snuggle next to me.

That does not stop Pepe, the much bigger, high-energy pointer from trying to squeeze in without taking into consideration he is actually sitting on top of me. We make a pretty funny scene all squished together.

The other source of laughter is Anteo, my grandson who is now 9 months old. What is funnier than a baby? My daughter sends daily short videos with Anteo doing all sorts of hilarious baby acrobatics and laughing away.

Have you seen anything funny on TV or Netflix? Check out Sebastian Mansicalco’s standup routine about the impossible task of teaching his father how to use the “Internets” – over the phone. Sebastian commented: “It hasn’t gotten any better… When I call my dad now, he always says ‘I can’t see you’… I say, ‘Because I’m calling you…this is not FaceTime.’”

My own father had the propensity of telling the same jokes over and over. For my sister and me, the funny part was that we heard them repeated so many times.

I recently dug out a file folder labeled “jokes” that I found among my father’s things after he died last January. It had a collection of jokes he amassed over many years to share when he was speaking in public. He always personalized them. Here’s one:

Last week I sat moping in my office and my secretary Birdie said, “Cheer up. Things could get worse.” So I did. And sure enough, things got worse.

Let’s laugh our way out of 2020 and into 2021. What makes you laugh?

What is your favorite joke? Where do you look for laughter? Do you record funny stories or videos? Do you browse the web for things to laugh at? Please share what makes you laugh!

While there’s undoubtedly been a major cultural shift in the collective perception of mental health and treatment for psychiatric disorders, finding a therapist that you click with—whether you’re looking for cognitive behavioral therapy or emotion-focused therapy still isn’t exactly a seamless or judgment-proof process. As the growing effort to remove the stigma that’s shadowed the discourse surrounding mental and psychological health for ages continues to widen, teletherapy (therapy sessions conducted via phone calls, video conferences, and chat) has become increasingly available and desirable, thanks in part to more convenience and flexibility with appointments, along with the current social distancing measures in place due to the pandemic.

Aside from that, many patients simply feel more comfortable and relaxed during sessions when they’re in the comfort of their own home rather than a potentially intimidating clinical setting. As a side note, even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis under your belt, we have our ups and downs, and frankly, it’s just nice to have an outsider’s prescriptive—yes, your friends and family are not only trained professionals, but they can also be (lovingly) biased.

Even when you’ve finally taken the plunge and decided to give therapy a shot, finding the right therapist or mental health care provider can be a struggle—whether you’re looking for in-person or virtual care. Often times, it’s a grueling process of trial and error, and the first one or two candidates don’t quite feel like the best fit. This process can be pretty discouraging, and can often leave those in need exhausted (because no one wants to re-hash their life story again and again to new people before meeting “the one”) resulting in giving up in therapy altogether. In fact, it’s kind of like using dating apps—you give your new date the same “best version of yourself” shpeal as if you’re on a job interview, only to discover the chemistry is off, or you get ghosted and have to move onto the next match.

Fortunately, just like dating apps (and first-time dates held over a Zoom call), most online therapy platforms make choosing the right therapist for you, your lifestyle and concerns pretty easy by asking you a series of questions and taking intel on your personal preferences (i.e. which gender you prefer and what type of symptoms or experiences you’re looking to work on). Sure, it’s not a foolproof process, but you are able to choose between a few recommended professionals that meet your criteria. In my experience, there is absolutely nothing more isolating than suffering from a mental health episode and feeling as though you’re alone in the harrowing journey to simply feel like yourself again — let alone feel happy.

While medication is often a necessary part of treatment, talk therapy has really helped me identify common thought patterns (for me, they’re anxiety-fueled cognitive distortions) which has helped me become more self-aware and able to distinguish when it’s my anxiety (I like to think of “her” a separate entity rather than an imbalance of mood-modulating neurotransmitters in my brain) talking versus my logical mind. Of course, one common critique of telemental health is that the therapeutic benefits will be lesser than face-to-face sessions. While this will vary for each person, some studies have indicated that virtual therapy can be just as effective as in-person care.

Finally, although it sucks to say it, therapy can be downright expensive—especially if you don’t have insurance or government health care assistance. Ahead, we’ve outlined some online therapy resources for a variety of different budgets to help you get the care you need (and 100 percent deserve) without having to step foot in a daunting medical office.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

Courtesy of Talkspace.

Talkspace

Talkspace gives you access to thousands of licensed and background-checked professionals without having to leave the comfort of your own home. Depending on which medium you choose to use for your sessions (video, cat. call, etc) will dictate the pricing, but it starts at just $69 per month (prices vary depending on the service you select) if you want to give it a risk-free shot. The one advantage I found with TalkSpace is that I could vent via chat whether it was early morning or late night when a situation arose, rather than having to wait around to see my therapist at our set appointments on Friday. The ability to just type out the situation that had occurred and how I felt about it immediately (although you can’t expect an immediate response at midnight) was also helpful in and of itself.

Amwell.

Amwell

Regardless of whether you’re dealing with symptoms related to hormones (i.e. postpartum depression) or a lifelong battle with Bipolar disorder, Amwell is here to help. They have a huge network of licensed and experienced professionals trained to deal with not only hormonal-based “phases,” but also OCD, life transitions, PTSD, chronic insomnia, and even couple’s therapy.

Pride.

Pride Counseling

Specializing in specific LGBTQ+ concerns, Pride Counseling gives you access to trained doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to talk to remotely. Whether you’re struggling with the idea of coming out to your family or simply having relationship issues, Pride Counselling offers a forum of non-judgemental professionals to help you get through, and learn better coping mechanisms and communication skills along the way.

While there’s undoubtedly been a major cultural shift in the collective perception of mental health and treatment for psychiatric disorders, finding a therapist that you click with—whether you’re looking for cognitive behavioral therapy or emotion-focused therapy still isn’t exactly a seamless or judgment-proof process. As the growing effort to remove the stigma that’s shadowed the discourse surrounding mental and psychological health for ages continues to widen, teletherapy (therapy sessions conducted via phone calls, video conferences, and chat) has become increasingly available and desirable, thanks in part to more convenience and flexibility with appointments, along with the current social distancing measures in place due to the pandemic.

Aside from that, many patients simply feel more comfortable and relaxed during sessions when they’re in the comfort of their own home rather than a potentially intimidating clinical setting. As a side note, even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis under your belt, we have our ups and downs, and frankly, it’s just nice to have an outsider’s prescriptive—yes, your friends and family are not only trained professionals, but they can also be (lovingly) biased.

Even when you’ve finally taken the plunge and decided to give therapy a shot, finding the right therapist or mental health care provider can be a struggle—whether you’re looking for in-person or virtual care. Often times, it’s a grueling process of trial and error, and the first one or two candidates don’t quite feel like the best fit. This process can be pretty discouraging, and can often leave those in need exhausted (because no one wants to re-hash their life story again and again to new people before meeting “the one”) resulting in giving up in therapy altogether. In fact, it’s kind of like using dating apps—you give your new date the same “best version of yourself” shpeal as if you’re on a job interview, only to discover the chemistry is off, or you get ghosted and have to move onto the next match.

Fortunately, just like dating apps (and first-time dates held over a Zoom call), most online therapy platforms make choosing the right therapist for you, your lifestyle and concerns pretty easy by asking you a series of questions and taking intel on your personal preferences (i.e. which gender you prefer and what type of symptoms or experiences you’re looking to work on). Sure, it’s not a foolproof process, but you are able to choose between a few recommended professionals that meet your criteria. In my experience, there is absolutely nothing more isolating than suffering from a mental health episode and feeling as though you’re alone in the harrowing journey to simply feel like yourself again — let alone feel happy.

While medication is often a necessary part of treatment, talk therapy has really helped me identify common thought patterns (for me, they’re anxiety-fueled cognitive distortions) which has helped me become more self-aware and able to distinguish when it’s my anxiety (I like to think of “her” a separate entity rather than an imbalance of mood-modulating neurotransmitters in my brain) talking versus my logical mind. Of course, one common critique of telemental health is that the therapeutic benefits will be lesser than face-to-face sessions. While this will vary for each person, some studies have indicated that virtual therapy can be just as effective as in-person care.

Finally, although it sucks to say it, therapy can be downright expensive—especially if you don’t have insurance or government health care assistance. Ahead, we’ve outlined some online therapy resources for a variety of different budgets to help you get the care you need (and 100 percent deserve) without having to step foot in a daunting medical office.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

Courtesy of Talkspace.

Talkspace

Talkspace gives you access to thousands of licensed and background-checked professionals without having to leave the comfort of your own home. Depending on which medium you choose to use for your sessions (video, cat. call, etc) will dictate the pricing, but it starts at just $69 per month (prices vary depending on the service you select) if you want to give it a risk-free shot. The one advantage I found with TalkSpace is that I could vent via chat whether it was early morning or late night when a situation arose, rather than having to wait around to see my therapist at our set appointments on Friday. The ability to just type out the situation that had occurred and how I felt about it immediately (although you can’t expect an immediate response at midnight) was also helpful in and of itself.

Amwell.

Amwell

Regardless of whether you’re dealing with symptoms related to hormones (i.e. postpartum depression) or a lifelong battle with Bipolar disorder, Amwell is here to help. They have a huge network of licensed and experienced professionals trained to deal with not only hormonal-based “phases,” but also OCD, life transitions, PTSD, chronic insomnia, and even couple’s therapy.

Pride.

Pride Counseling

Specializing in specific LGBTQ+ concerns, Pride Counseling gives you access to trained doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to talk to remotely. Whether you’re struggling with the idea of coming out to your family or simply having relationship issues, Pride Counselling offers a forum of non-judgemental professionals to help you get through, and learn better coping mechanisms and communication skills along the way.