Month: January 2024

Happy 2024! We are well on our way, and I am already feeling the days slipping by too fast. How about you? Did you set any New Year resolutions? How are you doing? Already blown that diet? Rain or snow forced you to rethink the daily workout you promised yourself? Finding it difficult to fit meditation or yoga in with family demands? You are not alone! No matter my resolve, my New Year resolutions rarely make it past January.

Intention Instead of Resolution

A friend recently sent me an article suggesting that instead of setting New Year resolutions, we should go for New Year intentions. What’s the difference? Intentions, the article explained, “are broader and encompass multiple areas of life”.

For example, instead of resolving to walk 10,000 steps every day, set the intention to live a healthier life. That might include exercise, but it certainly could also include eating habits, time with family and friends, and meditation or whatever you do to recharge.

An intention to advance your career might start with an evaluation of what excites you about your job. What do you value about what you do? Then you might decide to find a mentor or expand your network, attend seminars to broaden your knowledge, or volunteer to lead a project. On the other hand, you might decide it is time to make a career change.

How to Set Intentions

Since intentions may be a new concept, the article suggests a good place to start is to make a list of your top five values and five things you enjoy. For example, these are five things I value:

• Family and friends
• Spirituality
• Health
• Helping people
• Nature

Five things I enjoy:

• Getting together with family and friends
• Spending time in nature
• Expanding my knowledge
• Listening to music
• Writing!

Now think of ways that you can combine your lists. The article suggests that you write a few sentences using the present tense as if you’re already doing these things. For example:

• I am sharing time in nature with friends/family.
• I am finding new ways to stimulate my mind.
• I am taking time to recharge.

Before I retired, I would have focused on ways to value “helping people” through activities for and with my clients. Now I write blogs and promote my book, A Beginner’s Guide To Investing. I combine helping people with my passion for writing.

Keep your lists in a place where you can see them regularly and remind yourself of your intentions for 2024. I really like the idea that intentions help to “guide actions from a gentle, compassionate place – instead of a place of enforcement.”

Let’s Have a Conversation:

How do you feel about setting intentions? What are some of your values? Things you enjoy? How would you combine them in an intention for 2024?

Do you appreciate a word of praise? Do you like giving praise where it is due?

When I was working full time, I realised the importance of praise and encouragement. Even now at my ripe old age, if someone tells me I am doing a good job, I feel elated. It spurs me on to do better things.

So imagine how a younger person would feel to be told they are appreciated. Praise is a powerful tool that can build their confidence and give them self-worth. In my opinion, it cannot be underestimated.

Too often we jump to complain but are not so quick to give a compliment. Here are 5 ways to can express your praise for others.

Thank One Person a Day

Sometime ago I decided I would try and praise at least one person a day. This could be a waitress in the coffee shop or a helpful shop assistant. It could be anyone whose path I crossed and who looked like they needed a boost. The reaction I have had has been so uplifting, I urge you to try it!

When I ask to speak to a manager or supervisor, faces fall. This woman is about to make a fuss and complain – they think. So when I praise instead, the relief is palpable. Gratitude for my few words is overwhelming.

Appreciate a Person in Uniform

A case in point is the busy security lines at airports. The staff is working tirelessly to get hoards of people through the system. Often the general public are complaining about the wait and inconvenience, albeit for their own safety.

I once congratulated a duty supervisor on the cheerful attitude of his staff one busy morning at Gatwick Airport. I felt I had made his day. He admitted no one had ever given any positive feedback but many were quick to criticise. What a sorry state of affairs.

Thank a Younger Person

Another time I was in a very busy coffee shop. A very young girl who looked like a student, was struggling to cope alone with a long line of customers. To her credit she kept smiling, despite the grumblings about ‘a long wait’. She greeted each customer with courtesy.

As well as thanking her for her hard work, I approached her manager, who was obviously expecting me to complain. I pointed out that maybe she needed some help and encouragement. I hope my suggestions filtered through and her job got a bit easier.

Compliment a Family Member or Friend

As I mention this category, I hang my head in shame. Too often we forget to praise the ones we love. We take it for granted that they know how we feel. So while I take the time to praise complete strangers, I often overlook my nearest and dearest. I have two very special daughters, one a great mother and an inspiring teacher.

I also appreciate my youngest daughter, who has the most caring and empathic nature. Not forgetting my long-suffering husband who puts everyone before himself. I am surely blessed and need to tell them so more often.

Praise Yourself

And, once again, we tend to fall short here. We are often very self-critical and constantly underestimate our achievements. I think many of us were brought up in the 1950s. This was a time when it was expected that you did your best and no more was said. But as I write, the realisation dawns that we can work hard to achieve our goals, and deserve a pat on the back occasionally. I am sure you can relate to this.

Hope you don’t mind my input and of course the decision is yours.

So next time you see people doing the best they can (including those close to you as well as yourself), working hard under difficult circumstances, and managing to smile through, just a quiet word of praise may make their day.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

Do you try to compliment a stranger or friend every day? When was the last time someone gave you a genuine compliment? How did it make you feel?

Throughout the prior installments of this Sixty and Me blog series, I’ve covered the many facets of deciding to move to a new home later in life and how to prepare. Once you’ve moved, how do you adjust to your new living quarters and community?

All Those Boxes

If you followed the tips in the blog on preparing for your move, unpacking should be straightforward.

One of the first things to do is set up your bed and some tables and chairs so you can rest during the process. Next, unpack some of your favorite things to help you feel like this is your place. It could be a favorite picture or a special item that signifies you are at home.

Basic Arrival Chores

Take these practical steps to avoid headaches down the road.

Are the Smoke Alarms and Carbon Monoxide Detectors Working?

Replace batteries or entire units if necessary.

Are There Repair or Maintenance Issues?

Before unloading anything, walk through your new living space to spot anything that needs fixing or clean-up. If renting, alert the landlord. If you are the owner, make this your “to-do” list to keep your new home in top-notch shape.

Tell the State You’re Here

Moving across state lines? You may need to file a document called “Declaration of Domicile” to let the state know you’re a new resident ready to pay taxes. Check on the specific rules about declaring residency in your new state.

Register to Vote

It’s easy to forget this detail, so spare yourself problems on election day by registering as soon as possible. Also, look up the state and local government representatives who cover your area.

Where Are the City and County Offices?

Knowing where to find City Hall, the county service center, the police department, and the closest fire station can speed up getting help from the local government if needed.

Change Your Driver’s License

You may be able to use your old license legally for a while, but having a picture ID with your new address can help avoid many hassles. You may also need to register your vehicles in your new location. Check local rules concerning this to avoid future problems with law enforcement.

Get Out and Explore

It’s time to learn about your new community. Do a Google search on “stores near me” to compile a list of local businesses. Also, look for interesting destinations like coffee shops, cafes, restaurants, bars, gyms, museums, theaters, and community centers.

You’ll also want to know where to find the post office, parks, trails, libraries and recycling centers. For churchgoers, look for congregations in the area to find service times.

Making Connections

If your move has taken you away from your friends, it’s time to make new personal connections. Here are some tips for developing a new social network.

What’s Your Mindset?

If you’re an extrovert, making new friends might be easier. For many of us, however, getting out of our comfort zone takes more effort. Maintain a positive attitude and remind yourself that making friends takes time. Challenge yourself to take some social risks. It might be a slow process, and not everyone you contact wants to make a connection. Don’t take it personally and keep trying. Eventually, you’ll start to develop some satisfying social connections.

Your Peer Group

Connecting with people your age often is the easiest way to make friends. Moving into 55+ communities has this component built in. If you’re in an environment for all ages, look for local activities and venues with people closer to your age.

Neighbors

Neighbors are often curious about newcomers. Take advantage of this curiosity by reaching out to introduce yourself. It takes no time at all, and you can provide a note with your name and address so it’s easier for both parties to follow up.

Don’t Forget Old Friends

It’s a breeze to keep in touch with your existing friends via telephone and social media. Keeping in touch with your existing connections can help before your new social networks develop.

Use Social Media

Social media can help connect to people in your new community. Sites like Facebook Groups or meetup.com can help you find people with similar interests.

Sign Up

Enrolling in classes or workshops is a terrific way to meet people with common interests. Also, volunteering in the community at schools, churches, homeless shelters, food pantries, political parties, or city projects is a way to connect with like-minded people.

Successfully moving to a new location later in life involves a lot of forethought and planning. Taking logical steps throughout the process can help reduce stress in a time of many changes. Other stress-reducing tips are to be patient and expect ups and downs. Maintaining this mental and emotional flexibility will go a long way toward making your move go smoothly.

Let’s Have a Conversation:

What was the first box you unpacked after your most recent move? How did your life start in your new home and town? Which services and local shops did you look for first?