You’ve heard it said that youth is wasted on the young. It’s true! But some of us had no childhood to waste. We were subject to forces beyond our control and became old before our time.

Because of my mother’s sudden critical illness when I was six, my childhood was interrupted and I became a too-serious adult. Maybe you did, too. I learned how to appear to be having fun, but inside I was numb.

A Letter from My Sister

Some time ago I received an e-mail from my sister wishing me a happy birthday. The message she wrote brought tears. With her permission, I’m sharing it with you.

Hi Sherry,

Long, long (lllooooonnnnggg) ago, you were 6. Six is a significant age. That’s when a child first becomes aware that she is NOT the center of the universe. You were 6 when the mother-figure in your family abandoned you. She came back, but weakened and facing a long recovery. You’ve always said that had a profound effect on you. And I’ve always thought…well, let’s just say I didn’t give that event the same importance that you did.

But now I’m seeing it from your point of view. There you were, 6 years old, suddenly realizing you were not the one-and-only you thought you were. Well, Daddy goes to work every day and Mommy runs things. But Mommy’s sick so who’s next in line? You. And maybe that’s where the theme of your life began: RESPONSIBILITY. Of course that’s a good thing, but there are limits. Maybe when a burden like that descends on you at age 6, the limits become blurred. You’ve taken care of 5 husbands, 3 children, and countless friends and business associates.

And then you escaped! What is it that’s so compelling and entertaining about your life in Bali as you so eloquently describe it in your blog? Now I think I understand a bit more. You are living a childhood that you missed. You’re participating in life with the adventuresome spirit of a child. And your talent in writing allows us all to share your wonder and enthusiasm.

OK, maybe that’s a bit simplified, but thank you!!! Thank you for resurrecting that child! It takes a special talent to put the joys of childhood into adult words, but you’ve mastered the art. People all over the world appreciate you, and I appreciate you more than any of them! Happy Birthday!

The letter was signed with love. Knowing that my talented sister who has published a book of poems called Musings of a Damsel, Reflections of a Crone had given time and thought to what makes me who I am, was a very special gift

A Sister Bond is Special

I can’t tell you how wonderful it was to have those unspoken differences understood and expressed by someone who shared the same house and the same parents but experienced a much different childhood.

She remembers a relatively carefree youth. I remember feeling the weight of responsibility for my younger brother and sister, and the certainty that if I wasn’t a perfect child my mother would get sick again and die. Nobody asked me to take that on. It was a self-imposed duty.

So, to have my sister understand why I seem to take such childlike pleasure in every little detail of life here in Bali, touched my heart. And she got half of it right. I am living my lost childhood, and I am squeezing every ounce of joy and delight out of it that is offered up.

Why I Had to Chase My Dreams

The half that only I can know – until I share it with the rest of the world as I’m about to do now – is that I came within a hair’s breadth of missing it entirely. I was terrified of giving up the known to plunge into the unknown and turn everything I knew to be safe, up-side-down.

But one thing made me do it. The one thing was a greater fear – to face death with regrets. I knew if I didn’t chase the dream, as shadowy and undefined as it was, I would regret it to the grave.

So, I plunged. I plunged headfirst into childhood. I went to Bali, a place where I was brand-new. I didn’t know a soul. I had no responsibilities. Everything had yet to be learned, even the language, and each new discovery enchanted and delighted me. I was treated with gentleness and kindness and assisted by a staff of fun-loving angel-imps!

Did I know any of this before I exchanged the familiar old for the scary new? Nope! All I knew was that the alternative to not going in search of “little Sherry Grimsbo” was by far the more frightening scenario. Fear is a powerful motivator, and the highest and best use of fear is to propel us toward change for the better. Perhaps we can use this great motivator as we enter the uncertainties ahead in 2021. Simply facing fear is not enough.

Have you used fear to effect positive change in your life? Are you re-doing a lost childhood as a mature adult? Tell us about that and share in the comments!

If you’re like me, you never tire of TV series and movies set in the 1920s. Even though Downton Abbey has ended, we who have the DVDs or Netflix get to watch our favorite episodes again and again. And if you’re like me, you pay particular attention to the costumes and jewelry, which are like eye candy.

Art Deco Earrings

So to whet your appetite, here’s a pair of 1920s amethyst and filigree drop earrings that could have been worn by Lady Mary in the second half of the series. With their faceted, pale-amethyst glass teardrops capped with silver-metal filigree, these 2 1/4″ long earrings look just as stunning today as they did nearly a century ago.

How to Wear Them

Fortunately we don’t have to dress like a flapper to wear Art Deco jewelry. Here we see Penny in an oversized, white long-sleeved shirt that’s dressed up with a floral-print scarf in one of my favorite color combinations: navy and purple. When we did the photo shoot, she selected this scarf from my collection. I picked the earrings to complement the amethyst in the scarf.

That’s how I usually dress for the day – I choose a piece of jewelry or other accessory I want to wear and then work backwards. I put on clothes in a related or contrasting color and repeat the jewelry color in my other accessories.

With this framework that Penny’s wearing, I would add a pair of jeans and navy blazer along with my purple handbag. For a dressier outfit, you could wear a jacket and skirt or trousers. You don’t have to have a purple bag. I do because I love the color.

More 1920s Dramas for Inspiration

If you liked Downton Abbey, you may also enjoy two other British-made TV series set in the 1920s. The first is The House of Eliott, which was produced by the BBC and Acorn TV and created by Jean Marsh and Eileen Atkins. Both are British actors who also created Upstairs, Downstairs, an Edwardian-era series that originally broadcast from 1971 to 1975.

The House of Eliott, set in 1920s London, originally aired from 1991-1994. It’s the story of two sisters who, though born into wealth and privilege, find themselves penniless upon the sudden death of their father. With no education or training, they turn their talent for sewing and passion for fashion design into a dressmaking business. Their successful enterprise becomes a haute couture fashion house.

The fabulous costumes for the series were designed by Joan Wadge (1991-1994) and James Keast (1992). Wadge and the series won the award for Best Costume Design at the British Academy Television Awards (BAFTA) in 1992 and an Emmy in 1994. The BBC boxed-set of DVDs quotes The Sunday Times (UK) review of the series: “A feast for the eyes.” I couldn’t agree more. The sumptuous fabrics in splendid designs are adorned with equally superb costume jewelry.

An older, yet equally visually delicious British series, set in the late 1920s to early 1930s, is Love for Lydia. It was produced by Acorn Media in 1977. I first saw the program in 1979 on PBS’ Masterpiece Theatre. Based on a semi-autobiographical novel by H.E. Bates, this 13-part mini-series tells the story of Lydia Aspen, a young heiress who grows from bashful teen to flapper, and the four young men who fall in love with her.

Costume designers May Tapley and Evangeline Harrison won the 1978 BAFTA award for Best Costume Design. Love for Lydia is available on DVD and on AcornTV.com. Though dark in plot, the series features Mel Martin, Jeremy Irons, Christopher Blake, and Peter Davison early in their careers. The acting and the costumes are outstanding.

Do you like Art Deco jewelry as much as I do? Do you wear vintage costume jewelry? Why does it appeal to you? Have you seen these period dramas? Which is your favorite? Please share in the comments.

Benzoyl peroxide. Salicylic acid. Sulfur. BHAs and AHAs and PHAs. We’re used to hearing all these ingredients when it comes to breakouts. But there’s one buzzy new acne treatment that has everyone talking: succinic acid. It’s on the newer side in the beauty industry but it’s been used medicinally in European countries for years. Now, brands such as The Inkey List are using the ingredient to help acne sufferers get their clearest skin yet.

First, let’s start with the good stuff. Succinic acid has been shown to reduce inflammation (great for those red cystic zits) and excess sebum, while also de-clogging pores. Unlike other acne treatments, it doesn’t dry out the skin which can sometimes make a breakout worse. It helps balance pH levels so dehydrated skin is a thing of the past. It can even help hydrate the skin. Know what that means? Not only does it help with breakouts and dark spots, but it can also plump pesky fine lines and wrinkles. Succinic acid is naturally found in amber or sugar cane and fermented for use.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

One of the first big brands to incorporate succinic acid into its products is The Inkey List. The Succinic Acid Treatment works so well, it keeps selling out. (It’s probably also thanks to the affordable price tag.) Not only did The Inkey List put 2 percent succinic acid in its spot treatment, but also 1 percent sulfur powder to help absorb oil and salicylic acid to exfoliate. The combination of these three ingredients makes this one powerhouse product.

Although this is a more gentle acne treatment that works overtime, you’ll still want to use a hydrating moisturizer and/or serum after application. It’s safe to use during the day and some fans even use it under makeup. A skin-clearing primer? Sign me up.

Because this best-seller keeps flying off the shelves you’ll want to check back here and see if it’s back in stock. Don’t worry—Sephora does keep restocking it. In the meantime, try some other favorites from the brand to keep your skin in tip-top shape.

Retinol Anti-Aging Serum

This non-irritating, line-smoothing formula uses 1 percent of what the brand calls “RetiStar stabilized retinol” as well as .5 percent Granactive retinoid to reduce the look of fine lines and wrinkles, as well as squalane for hydration.

Salicylic Acid Acne + Pore Cleanser

Oily, acne-prone skin doesn’t stand a chance against 2 percent salicylic acid, anti-inflammatory zinc compound and soothing .5 percent Allantoin.

Niacinamide Oil Control Serum

This lightweight serum kicks shine, as well as reduces blemishes, redness, and hyperpigmentation, with 10 percent niacinamide.

Benzoyl peroxide. Salicylic acid. Sulfur. BHAs and AHAs and PHAs. We’re used to hearing all these ingredients when it comes to breakouts. But there’s one buzzy new acne treatment that has everyone talking: succinic acid. It’s on the newer side in the beauty industry but it’s been used medicinally in European countries for years. Now, brands such as The Inkey List are using the ingredient to help acne sufferers get their clearest skin yet.

First, let’s start with the good stuff. Succinic acid has been shown to reduce inflammation (great for those red cystic zits) and excess sebum, while also de-clogging pores. Unlike other acne treatments, it doesn’t dry out the skin which can sometimes make a breakout worse. It helps balance pH levels so dehydrated skin is a thing of the past. It can even help hydrate the skin. Know what that means? Not only does it help with breakouts and dark spots, but it can also plump pesky fine lines and wrinkles. Succinic acid is naturally found in amber or sugar cane and fermented for use.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale.

One of the first big brands to incorporate succinic acid into its products is The Inkey List. The Succinic Acid Treatment works so well, it keeps selling out. (It’s probably also thanks to the affordable price tag.) Not only did The Inkey List put 2 percent succinic acid in its spot treatment, but also 1 percent sulfur powder to help absorb oil and salicylic acid to exfoliate. The combination of these three ingredients makes this one powerhouse product.

Although this is a more gentle acne treatment that works overtime, you’ll still want to use a hydrating moisturizer and/or serum after application. It’s safe to use during the day and some fans even use it under makeup. A skin-clearing primer? Sign me up.

Because this best-seller keeps flying off the shelves you’ll want to check back here and see if it’s back in stock. Don’t worry—Sephora does keep restocking it. In the meantime, try some other favorites from the brand to keep your skin in tip-top shape.

Retinol Anti-Aging Serum

This non-irritating, line-smoothing formula uses 1 percent of what the brand calls “RetiStar stabilized retinol” as well as .5 percent Granactive retinoid to reduce the look of fine lines and wrinkles, as well as squalane for hydration.

Salicylic Acid Acne + Pore Cleanser

Oily, acne-prone skin doesn’t stand a chance against 2 percent salicylic acid, anti-inflammatory zinc compound and soothing .5 percent Allantoin.

Niacinamide Oil Control Serum

This lightweight serum kicks shine, as well as reduces blemishes, redness, and hyperpigmentation, with 10 percent niacinamide.

We would all like to be creative. Perhaps it is not so hard.

“Curiosity about life in all its aspects, I think, is still the secret of great creative people,” noted the late Leo Burnett, outstanding advertising executive and founder of the firm that bears his name. If so, then by encouraging our own curiosity, we can become more creative.

Former journalist Harry W. Hoover’s little book Born Creative maintains that we all are born creative, but some of us don’t believe we are, and so we don’t exercise that skill.

Hoover cites a Harvard Business Review (HBR) study that found that those who think they are not creative, are not, and those who think they are creative, are. Inventor Henry Ford is credited with saying, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”

Perhaps your opinion correctly summarizes past experience, but Ford’s implied urging toward positive thinking supports Hoover’s view that however much we are innately creative, we can all do better.

Creative Mindset Test

Hoover offers HBR’s five-question test to gauge our “creative mindset.” It asks yes/no questions about:

Associational Thinking: Do you solve problems by drawing on diverse ideas or knowledge?

Questioning: Do you often ask questions that challenge assumptions?

Observing: Do you get innovative ideas by watching how people behave?

Idea Networking: Do you frequently interact with a diverse set of people?

Experimenting: Do you try to create new methods?

HBR would rate you as “creative” if you answered “yes” to a majority of these questions, but even if you did not, Hoover proposes some approaches to exercise and improve your creative muscle. Hoover reports that a study found that the average adult thinks up two or three alternatives for “any given situation,” but the average child thinks of 60. No wonder kids find so many ways to get into trouble!

Embrace Change

A comment by David Norris helped Hoover realize that his time was more precious than his income, especially when he was spending a couple of hours a day commuting. He altered his career trajectory and now works from home.

Generate an “I Am” List

Hoover recommends this clever exercise: Leaving the first entry blank, write down 30 things you are good at. When all done, put as #1 “I am really creative.” Re-read it frequently, as auto-suggestion, or self-hypnosis.

Don’t Be Like this Big Fish

Scientists ran an experiment with a big fish, Hoover relates, a fish that was initially given all the minnows it could eat, while it swam in its aquarium. Next, they encased minnows individually in strong, transparent containers, where they could swim, but the big fish could not get at them.

Soon, the big fish gave up trying. Next, they released the minnows from the containers, but the big fish did not try to eat them, having “learned” it couldn’t. This did not end well.

Make Creative Weather: Brainstorm

You are probably familiar with brainstorming, which Hoover praises. In an informal meeting, solicit ideas, and keep pushing for more ideas, while shielding each participant from criticism. Crucial elements are: proper preparation, a skilled facilitator, generating without denigrating, suspending judgment, quantity not quality to start, going “beyond reason” and piggybacking one idea on another. Capture the ideas in writing.

Use SCAMMPERR for Creativity

To come up with novelty, Hoover uses SCAMMPERR to suggest the following approaches: Substitute, Combine, Adapt, Magnify, Modify, Put to another use, Eliminate, Rearrange, Reverse.

Steve Jobs has been quoted as saying that creativity is often the joining of disparate elements to make something new.

Psychologist Edward de Bono, author of multiple books on creative thinking, emphasized the value of comparing and contrasting dissimilar items to generate new ideas. De Bono also maintains that creativity helps make life more fun and more interesting.

Harness Your Creative Courage and Judgment

“Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep,” wrote cartoonist-author-entrepreneur Scott Adams. By being brave, we can risk making mistakes. “Art” may largely be a matter of taste.

You won’t know until you try.

How do you express your own creativity? What do you do to stimulate it? What would go on your “I am” list? Please join the conversation.