Tom Sandoval’s Plaid Tie Dye Shirt

Vanderpump Rules Season 8 Episode 7 Fashion

We’ve had an increasing amount of request for men’s clothing, and since my husband never likes what I pick out for him, I’ve decided to steal his Instagram handle and start @BigBlondeHusband, dedicated to men’s Reality TV fashion. That way when we find good pieces we can put them up there to share with the world.

Our first post will be dedicated to Bravo’s most stylish man, Tom Sandoval and his plaid tie dye shirt on tonight’s Vanderpump Rules.  And although it’s sold out, I still think it’s totally tie-dye for

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Zara Plaid Tie Dye Shirt Sold Out

Originally posted at: Tom Sandoval’s Plaid Tie Dye Shirt

Ariana Madix’s Black Crochet Lace Top

Vanderpump Rules Season 8 Episode 7 Fashion

Ariana Madix’s black crochet lace top talking to Dayna Kathan is a super cute take on classic lace that we always love. Ariana always brings it in the fashion department, and this look is no exception.

This scene was a super cute moment between the two blondes that have both come out as bi-sexual. Ariana is having a tough seasons so it’s great to see her back behind the bar bonding with someone who understands something about her that some of her cast mates don’t seem to (Cough, cough Jax Taylor). And we’re also quite happy to bond with her over love for this top.

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Click Here to See her Pink0 Blouse

Originally posted at: Ariana Madix’s Black Crochet Lace Top

I recently poured out my heart to a colleague about my guilt at two condolence notes left unwritten. One note was intended for a colleague whose sister had died, though I’d heard about the death long after the funeral had taken place.

The sisters had shared a close bond that I hoped to capture in writing. Choosing a plain condolence card onto which I would add my own personal sentiments, I sat down to write.

Days became weeks, and the card remained blank as I battled with indecision about what to say. In a sad turn of events, the surviving sister died suddenly, leaving me with great guilt for not having reached out in writing to let her know that I cared.

That same year, another colleague lost his wife to cancer. This time I attended the funeral service but felt a personal expression of sympathy was in order. For several hours, I painstakingly wrote and rewrote that note only to set it aside in frustration.

After all, what comforting words could there possibly be to express my sentiments about this beautiful woman taken too soon from this life? I tried again on the first anniversary of her death, and still the words would not come.

I had missed two opportunities to express my sorrow. Later, I saw my colleague and realized that he would never know how much he had been in my thoughts.

It would seem that the combination of my careers – funeral director and writer – would endow me with an effortless ability to write such notes. After all, I reasoned, funeral directors are around death all the time and should know just how to console others.

Well, despite my stock and trade, I struggle. And, I am not alone.

So, what is it about condolence notes that makes them so difficult to write? Do we fear offending in some way? Are we afraid of saying too much, or too little? Do we worry that they are not personal enough, or too personal? Do we fear falling short?

A Little History

The word “condolence” has been in the vernacular since the 1600s when it was defined as “sympathetic grief” and “sorrowing with another.” But such letters go back much further. There is archaeological evidence that the ancient Greeks wrote such letters, mostly after the death of a child.

The Victorians elevated condolence letters to an art form, writing in an elegant cursive script on high-quality mourning stationery rimmed in black. According to the book Death in the Victorian Family, “Victorian condolence letter writers offered affection and sympathy in abundance.”

In more recent times, writer Edith Wharton wrote a six-page letter to President Theodore Roosevelt upon hearing of the death of his son Quentin during WWI.

She included the important components of a condolence note, expressions of sympathy and comfort, along with a personal recollection: “We had a delightful long talk after lunch, which gave me such a sense of his vitality, his understanding, his happy face.”

While Wharton’s letter to Pres. Roosevelt flowed fluently, that is often not the case for the average letter writer, especially in this day and age of short texts and tweets. Still, there are some guidelines we can all follow.

8 Tips to Writing Condolence Notes

• Social media expressions of sympathy aren’t enough. Nothing takes the place of a handwritten note.
• Steer clear of clichés and platitudes. Telling a mourner that their loved one is in a better place may be met with “Where, the ground?” by the less spiritual.
• Well-intentioned as it may be, resist the urge to reassure the bereaved that time will lessen their grief, and they will find closure. There often isn’t any closure.
• It’s okay to admit when words fail. In fact, there are some deaths so tragic that there are no adequate words of consolation. A simple, “There are no words for this,” is honest and direct.
• Share a personal recollection, perhaps something the mourners did not know about the deceased. These reminiscences serve to remind family and friends that their loved one touched many lives.
• Quote from the great writers and poets like Shakespeare, Kahlil Gibran, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, and Emily Dickinson, who wrote, “Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality.”
• Offer something tangible. Reassure the mourners you are “there for them” – whether to lend an ear, run an errand, or spend some time together.
• Resist the impulse to try to compose the perfect note of sympathy. As philosopher Voltaire said, “The perfect is the enemy of the good.”

So, there you have it. It isn’t always easy to write condolence notes, but doing so will bring you peace, and may be a ray of sunshine for those who read them.

What is it about condolence notes that makes them so difficult to write? Do you fear you might offend? Or do you worry they’re not personal enough? Please use the comment box below to share your experience and thoughts.

Stassi Schroeder’s Pink Puffy Top, White Pants and Pink Satin Shoes at Brittany’s Wedding Shower

Vanderpump Rules Season 8 Episode 7 Fashion

We first reported on Stassi Schroeder’s pink puffy top, white pants and pink satin shoes back in April when she wore them to host an event at Bloomingdales, and I’ve got good news and bad news regarding it. The good news is that she got more use of of this totally amazing outfit by also wearing it to Brittany Cartwright’s wedding shower on tonight’s Vanderpump Rules. The bad news is that while it was in stock when we first posted on it the pieces are now sold out. And the other bad news is that if you are married already you probably missed out on the idea of having princesses at your wedding shower.

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Click Here to See her Wayf Pants

Click Here to See her SJP Heels

Click Here to See her Sold Out Acler Top

Information: @StassiSchroeder

Originally posted at: Stassi Schroeder’s Pink Puffy Top

Victoria Fuller’s Green Silk Dress at the Rose Ceremony

The Bachelor Season 24 Episode 8 Fashion

Victoria Fuller’s green silk dress at the rose ceremony that she somehow made it to on last night’s episode of The Bachelor was super chic, which is why we’re very sorry to report that it’s out of stock. And although we really hate being the bearer of bad news, we’re just glad that we have the ability to hide our faces while doing so like Merissa.

Fashionably,

Faryn

Click Here to See Her Sold Out Reformation Dress

Click Here to Shop Her Schutz Sandals

Originally posted at: Victoria Fuller’s Green Silk Dress