Author: Admin01
Staying Sharp: What I’ve Learned About Focus as I Grow Older
I’ve always been interested in brain health, especially after reading more about neuroplasticity. But I never worried about my brain much. It was just there – ready, reliable, always on call. But as I got older, I noticed little shifts: forgetting why I walked into a room, forgetting names, misplacing my glasses. (I actually now keep a pair in every room!)
And then I got a call from a good friend… she told me that her husband had been diagnosed with the first stages of Alzheimer’s. And I thought, Oh s—! These aren’t some random ‘old people’ – these are my peers! (I know that sounds cold… but that’s the first place my head went, even though I cringe to say that.) And I knew that if I wanted to keep that easy focus I once took for granted, I needed to make some changes.
So, I began to research ways to take care of my brain. I discovered that staying mentally sharp isn’t about doing one big thing – it’s about small, steady habits that add up.
A few things we can do to help our brain:
Exercise
One of the first things I did was to commit to more exercise… no marathons or anything extreme! I started doing aqua-aerobics with a friend, and I started riding my bike more. Where my husband and I live in Portugal, it is flat and by the sea, and bike riding and walking is such a pleasure. The sunshine, the salty sea breeze and the movement all feed the brain as much as the body.
Learning
I also learned, unsurprisingly, that studying and learning new things helps to focus the brain and increase its neuroplasticity. And because we are relatively new in Portugal, we happen to be learning a new language. Did you know that learning a new language can increase neuroplasticity and have remarkable cognitive benefits?
I can honestly tell you this is not easy! I am frustrated more than not… But the challenge itself is part of the point. Each time I solve something new, it feels like my brain is stretching and waking up.
You may not be living in a new country, but it’s never too late to start learning a new language. Or start learning how to play an instrument.
Learning to play a musical instrument demonstrably promotes neuroplasticity by stimulating the brain to adapt and change, strengthening neural pathways and improving cognitive functions like memory, attention, and executive functions. This process involves both structural and functional changes in the brain’s gray matter and white matter, enhancing its ability to learn and reorganize itself throughout a person’s life.
If you’d like to start piano lessons, Sixty and me offers a FREE video course for beginners. You can check it out here: PIANO LESSONS FOR BEGINNERS.
Sleep
Sleep, too, is an absolute priority. I have known for a while how important sleep is, especially for the aging brain.
Sleep is crucial for the aging brain, as it facilitates memory consolidation, waste removal via the lymphatic system, and maintains cognitive functions like attention and decision-making.
Food
And of course there is the food we put in our bodies. The food that feeds the brain includes vegetables, berries, nuts and fish. No one is telling you to give up the foods you love. Go ahead and have ice cream when you want it. But be mindful of feeding your brain too and give it what it needs.
Pausing
But perhaps the most powerful shift came from pausing. I wrote about this in my last article for Sixty and Me!
Practicing mindfulness just five minutes with my breath in the morning is incredibly helpful. Just this simple practice helped me focus longer, and I was less reactive, and my mind felt calmer.
Connection
A massive addition to keep the aging brain sharp is connection! Staying in touch with friends, meeting people for coffee, going for walks with people. These connections aren’t just social – they are brain workouts. Increasing your social group is a big recommendation for helping our aging brain! (My upcoming article explores ‘SuperAgers’ and the importance of connection.)
What I’ve learned is this: staying focused and keeping my brain strong isn’t about fighting age. Not at all… instead it’s about working with it, giving the mind what it needs to stay alive and curious. Movement, learning new things, sleep, good food, mindfulness, and connection – these aren’t chores, they’re gifts!
And the best part? It’s never too late. Each small habit feels like I’m giving my brain a thank-you note (I know that sounds cheesy…) but it’s a nice warm feeling. These are the kind of habits that I don’t need to break!
If you are interested in more articles about brain health, you can find more on my Website or my Substack Page. I love hearing from people, so please let me know your thoughts about keeping our brain focus as we age, or any other subject that comes up as you read.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
What do you do to keep your brain focused and healthy? Do you have any blocks that stop you from doing things you know are helpful? What’s your favorite thing to do that promotes brain health?
Read More
Money Shame: The Hidden Weight Many Women Over 60 Still Carry
Most of us know what it feels like to regret a purchase. Maybe you’ve bought something you didn’t need, given too much to a loved one, or carried debt longer than you expected.
But there’s a heavier burden that lingers long after the money is gone: money shame.
Money shame isn’t just about dollars and cents. It’s about worth, identity, and the stories we tell ourselves about what our financial choices “say” about us. And for many women over 60, money shame has been a lifelong companion.
Marjorie’s Story
Marjorie, 72, still cringes when she remembers a credit card balance from her 40s. She paid it off years ago, but when she looks at her retirement accounts today, she still hears the voice in her head, saying, “If you hadn’t messed up then, you’d be fine right now.”
The debt is gone, but the shame lingers. It shapes how she spends, how she talks to her children about money, even how she sees herself in the mirror.
Why Money Shame Sticks Around
Money shame is sticky because it attaches to our sense of worth. Let’s discuss a few reasons it often shows up strongly for women later in life.
Messages from Childhood
Many grew up hearing “we don’t talk about money” or “people like us can’t afford that.” These scripts stay alive in our heads for decades.
Cultural Expectations
Women of this generation were often taught to prioritize everyone else’s needs above their own. Spending on yourself? Selfish. Saying no? Cold.
Life Transitions
Divorce, widowhood, and retirement bring financial shifts that can trigger old shame stories: “I should have planned better.”
Comparison
Seeing friends with bigger homes, fancier trips, or more savings can spark feelings of failure, whether or not your own choices were wise.
How Money Shame Shows Up
It’s not always obvious. Sometimes money shame hides behind habits that look like “responsibility” or “discipline.”
Ask yourself:
- Do I avoid opening bills or bank statements because I dread what I’ll feel?
- Do I downplay my successes, “I just got lucky”, instead of celebrating them?
- Do I keep financial secrets from loved ones, not because of privacy, but because of embarrassment?
- Do I hear a harsh inner voice whenever I spend on myself?
These are all signs that shame, not wisdom, is driving your money decisions.
The Cost of Carrying Shame
Money shame doesn’t make us better with money. In fact, it often makes things worse.
Avoidance
When shame runs the show, we put off hard conversations or ignore problems until they grow bigger.
Over-Restriction
Some women swing the other way, denying themselves joy or rest because they “don’t deserve it.”
Silence
Shame convinces us to keep quiet, which blocks us from getting support.
Relationship Strain
Whether with adult children, partners, or friends, shame erodes trust and openness.
Untangling Money and Worth (The Tool)
The first step to healing money shame is realizing this: Your financial history is not your identity.
Here are a few practical ways to start:
- Name it. Notice when that shame voice shows up. Label it: “That’s shame talking.” Simply naming it can create space between you and the feeling.
- Get curious, not critical. Instead of “I’m so bad with money,” try asking: “What story am I telling myself right now?” Curiosity softens the shame.
- Share in safe places. Talking with a trusted friend, coach, or support group can transform isolation into connection. Often we find out: we’re not alone.
- Celebrate small wins. Shame thrives on highlighting mistakes. Keep a simple list of moments you followed through, paying a bill, setting a boundary, saying no.
- Practice self-compassion. Treat yourself as kindly as you would treat a friend. Mistakes don’t erase your worth.
Why Letting Go Matters
When you loosen shame’s grip, a few things happen:
- You start making choices from confidence, not fear.
- You open space for joy, whether that’s travel, hobbies, or a simple night out.
- You can finally talk openly about money, which deepens relationships and helps you both feel safe.
- You reclaim the sense that your hard work has been worth it.
Closing Thoughts
Money shame can feel like an old shadow that never quite goes away. But it doesn’t define you. With awareness, small shifts, and a willingness to rewrite your money story, you can step into this chapter of life with more freedom and peace.
Want to learn more about healing the impact of financial shame and trauma? Read more here.
Let’s Have a Conversation:
Have you suffered from money shame? What is your money “sin” and have you gotten healed from it?
Read More
