One reason
I’d wanted to move into my continuing care retirement community was to stop
cooking dinner. I’d grown tired of planning meals, dashing to the supermarket
for missing ingredients, and cleaning up the kitchen afterward.

In the
years before my husband’s Parkinson’s disease worsened, he’d done the dishes. But
for the 18 months before we moved, the kitchen work had been all mine. I’d wanted
someone else to take over.

The Food Plan

Our
community has two eating places, a dining room with cloth-covered tables where
waiters serve a plated dinner, and an informal bistro where you can grab a
burger anytime. Both restaurants stop seating people at seven o’clock, which is
much earlier than we had been accustomed to, but okay.

Tom and I
each receive 388 food points a month to use however we choose. That’s enough
for one full meal a day, with wine, and then some. So far, we haven’t run out
of points at the end of the month, and we’ve invited guests regularly.

Quantity
hasn’t been a problem. Quality? A slightly different story.

Something Was Missing

Ordering
from all over the menu, we discovered some dishes were quite good, some were
just good, and some were awful. There was a lot of repetition. I soon grew
tired of potatoes and noodles and breaded cutlets.

I missed
the quinoa, ethnic food, and exotic veggies I used to enjoy. One Sunday we
didn’t go to the restaurant; I dragged out the wok I had insisted on keeping when
we moved into our apartment and cooked Chinese style.

I did so
the following week. Then I prepared others of our old favorites: rack of lamb
and bison burgers. Each time the smell of spices and rendering meat permeated our
apartment. Not anticipated, but delicious.

My
enthusiasm for flavor soon gave way, however, partly because I hated going to a
new supermarket to get ingredients – I didn’t
know where to find things – and partly
out of pique. We were paying for meals and I wanted my money’s worth.

I decided
to adapt to the menu by bringing my own quinoa to the dining room. And
scallions and pumpkin seeds to sprinkle on top. Then I noticed another woman was
improving the fare.

She
brought a baggie full of spices with her to the table. Like me, she must have
wanted to enjoy the taste of home in the place she now called home.

The Game People Play

More people
took things away from the table than
brought things to it, though. I soon noticed
that people ordered their soup “to go” so they could take it to their apartment
for lunch the next day. Other people filled plastic containers with a second
helping from the salad bar to serve as the base for another meal.

Some
people ordered double veggies and a doggie bag along with their entrée. Taking
cookies and deserts home to nibble in front of the TV seemed to be standard
operating procedure.

The waiters
patiently packaged all the take-out requests. Clearly, residents didn’t want
food, or points, to go to waste. I don’t like waste either, but it seemed to me
that the take-out game would require brainwork I no longer wanted to expend.

Would I Play?

In the
end, it came down to energy. I had to prioritize my husband’s care and my own
health, which includes writing and maintaining our athletic dog’s lifestyle,
over the extra brainwork the dining game would require.

But adding
flavor or jicama to an ordinary dish? That was an acceptable expenditure of
energy. So was taking home anything I got too full to eat.

I decided
it was okay to dedicate a little bit of bandwidth to making meals a little bit
more enjoyable. I overcame my second thoughts, especially when I saw how often
my husband spilled soup on the tablecloth. Someone else cleaned up after him,
with a smile.

Not all CCRC’s run their meal plans in the same way. Make sure to find
out how meals are handled in the CCRC that interests you. Please do contact me
if you want more detail.

How often do you cook at home? Do you
sometimes find it tedious? Why? Do you think you could get used to food cooked
by others? Please share with our community.

Look back over the years and if you’re lucky, you’ll have clocked up a fair few holidays. Sun-soaked beaches, less-than-perfect campsites, city wanderings. The fact is that simply having a break from routine provides us with the memories that stand out most in our life.

Where
do you find those memorable holiday moments now? Not surprisingly, as we age,
so our tastes and demands change.

The
camping holiday that seemed distinctly uncool in our teens somehow morphed into
the favourite go-to family holiday, and the prospect of a stress-free cruise
which may have horrified us in our 30s may seem quite appealing now.

The
good news is that after decades of family holidays, you can now be deliciously
selfish! You may look back with nostalgia at the holidays when babies and
toddlers left you hankering for a romantic break à deux, but
there’s more to be gained by moving on from this and looking to the future.

For most of us,
much of the attraction of a holiday is in being somewhere new, together with the
pleasure of stepping off the treadmill and forgetting about everyday demands on
our time. Many of us also like learning about new things and get a kick out of meeting
new people.

But
we may also need time just to be with our favourite people, to re-connect and
enjoy the simple pleasure of spending time together. So, what are the different
options available and how do we find the right one for each of us?

What About a Solo Holiday?

Remember,
no-one ever demanded that you share the same interests as your partner forever,
so even if you’ve lived happily with someone for 30 years plus, there’s nothing
to say that separate holidays won’t do you both good!

If
you’re not keen on setting off completely solo, perhaps consider joining forces
with a friend or do some research into joining a small organised group tour.

Of
the 16 or so guests on our escorted walking
tours to Italy, at least a third are usually solo holidaymakers and many
return year after year to discover a new part of Italy together.

Should We Join a Group Tour?

If
you thought group tours were just for solos, think again. Holidaying with your
partner within a group is a great way of making new friends, following existing
interests, and, better still, trying new activities together.

The
best bit, of course, is that linking up with a guided group means that someone
else takes care of all the arrangements and organisation, leaving you free to
relax and get on with your holiday.

So,
for example, if you both enjoy walking, signing up to an escorted hiking
holiday can be a great option. Enjoy the luxury of having someone else to plan
and lead your routes, track down the best restaurants in the area, or even pack
(and carry!) a picnic.

Hedonistic Hiking, for example, lead
gastronomic hiking holidays to most regions in Italy, mixing in cultural visits
with foodie-related activities and wine-tasting.

Better
still, if you choose to follow a particular interest, such as hiking or
wine-tasting, there’s a good chance that you’ll find yourself amongst
like-minded people.

Should We Holiday with Friends?

Holidaying
with long-standing friends can be great fun, particularly when the friendship
extends over many years. Enjoy discovering new places together, lingering over
lunches in the sun and having the time to sit and chat about the things that
really matter to you.

It’s
wise, however, to set some ground rules before you go, particularly if you’re
sharing accommodation.

Will
you spend every day together, or are you all happy to go your separate ways on
some days? Will you self-cater or eat out? Remember that if you’ve each brought
up your own family, you’ll have your own way of doing things on holiday.

How often do you and your partner take separate holidays? How much
do you enjoy meeting new people on holiday? Do you ever take a holiday with one
or more of your grown-up children but without your partner? Please share your
stories with our sisters!

Lala Kent’s Black Floral Blazer at Dinner

Vanderpump Rules Season 8 Episode 8 Fashion

While James Kenndey may fancy himself a “Topman”, Lala Kent’s black floral blazer is about to take that title because it’s tag says the very same thing. Except this time we’ll be giving a UK based brand credit for the design instead of stealing the name and making it into a song. And leave it to Lala—who I truly believe has never looked better than she does this episode— to borrow a blazer from the boys and make look better than they do.

The Realest Housewife,

Big Blonde Hair

Black and Red Satin Floral Slim Fit Topman Blazer

Originally posted at: Lala Kent’s Black Floral Blazer

Hannah Ann Sluss’ Floral Ruffle Dress in Australia

The Bachelor Season 24 Episode 9 Fashion

Although we couldn’t see much of Hannah Ann Sluss’ floral ruffle dress in Australia on last night’s episode of The Bachelor except the straps, I still made it my mission to find it for the fans out there that like Hannah Ann, love a good floral sundress (this was her third of the episode). And to avoid being flooded with messages in our DMs with ya’ll saying “Don’t let it go. Bring it home to us.”

Fashionably,

Faryn

Click Here to Shop Her ASTR The Label Dress

Originally posted at: Hannah Ann Sluss’ Floral Ruffle Dress

Have you
ever searched online for an exercise video?

If you
want to stay active, feel stronger, improve your balance, feel more flexible or
mobile, then you may have considered or already tried using online exercise
videos.

It’s
convenient because we have so many options to get some exercise done at home,
whether you want to find good stretches for your back, do 5 minutes of balance
training, or even do a full workout class.

But the
challenge is that with choice comes confusion and overwhelm.

You can
spend all the time you planned to exercise just looking for the right video. Or
you start one and then find it’s too challenging or just not what you were
looking for. By then, you don’t have time to look again and you give up for the
day.

Doing
exercises based on online videos can be risky too. You may end up doing an
exercise that isn’t suitable for you, overdo it, or even injure yourself.

I don’t
want this to happen to you. In this article, I will talk you through how to go
about finding and choosing the best online exercise videos for you.

But I Already Go to an Exercise Class!

When I
talk about online exercise videos, many people tell me that they already go to
a class, or they already have some regular movement in their weekly schedule.
It’s not a question of either doing home exercise or going to a class – the best solution is almost certainly
a combination of both.

Doing a short routine at home
in between your class meets will help to maintain or build on some of the gains
you have made in the class. It can also provide variety and help ensure you are
addressing all the components of fitness.

For
example, some of our Studio members walk regularly, so they know they are
getting some cardiovascular exercise. But they also know that they need to do
strength and balance exercises. These are harder to do independently, and it
helps to have someone to demonstrate and talk you through the exercises.

We see the
best results for balance training when we do the exercises most days of the
week. So, having a video that you can do, even if it’s just a few minutes long,
can make this much easier.

Where to Start? Ask Around

To start
your research, ask people you trust for recommendations. Friends, family, online
community –
put the question out there. Many people subscribe to YouTube channels, have
favourite websites with videos, or hold online exercise memberships.

Your doctor,
physiotherapists, physical therapists, osteopaths, or chiropractors might have
suggestions as well. Perhaps their other patients have found some good
resources they can share.

Any personal recommendation will help you to come up with a shortlist and give
you a few options to look into in more detail.

Set Aside Research Time – Don’t Jump Straight In

Realise
that you will need to take some time to research the various options.

Take your
list of recommendations and look around the instructors’ websites, YouTube
channels, and social media. Find out about their background, qualifications,
and specialties. If it’s not clear, get in touch with them and ask. A good
instructor will be happy to share this information with you.

See what
kind of people they have worked with, and who has left testimonials for them.
If you are looking for exercises to help with arthritis, does the instructor
mention this? Do they seem to understand, empathise with, and appreciate your
concerns?

Do they
give different versions of exercises and do they offer modifications if you
have issues? Exercising well can be complex, and it’s important to be working
at the right level for you. If an instructor is fixed on doing things a certain
way and doesn’t give you options, they may not be right for you.

Can You Ask Questions?

Check
whether the instructor takes questions about the exercises. Even with the best
video, you may have questions, and it’s important to be able to get these
answered.

I get a
lot of emails, and while I don’t always get back straight away, I do answer all
the queries. And I am very active in our online Studio,
where I field daily questions from members who want to make sure they are doing
the right exercises at the right level for them.

Being
available for questions is important to me. I know that when you feel 100%
confident that you’re doing an exercise right for you, that is when you will
keep doing it. And we don’t get results unless we keep doing them.

Want to Improve Your
Balance Safely? Look Out for This Red Flag

If you’re
looking for exercises
to improve your balance, make sure that the instructor
recommends standing near a support. If they don’t mention that, then perhaps
they haven’t worked with people who have balance issues or are worried about
falls.

Of course,
you could do the exercises near a support and be fine, but this should make you
wonder what else they don’t know or haven’t thought about. If anything else
along these lines bothers you or makes you wonder about their understanding of
your condition, needs, or goals, then keep looking.

Fast Forward

When you
find someone, whose courses could work for you, have a look at the videos. You
can fast forward through the videos or scroll through and click at different
points in the video. Take a look at the exercises they’re doing and see if it
looks like something you could do.

You might
feel a bit nervous, especially if you haven’t done any exercise like this
before. Don’t let your lack of confidence put you off. If it looks a little bit
hard but you feel confident that you can at least give it a go, then that’s all
right.

However,
if you start looking through the video and the instructor begins doing handstands,
or something similarly crazy, then this may not be the right video for you. That
is, unless your balance is good enough to do the handstands. In that case, keep
watching that video and have fun!

Personal Preference Matters

Just
because your friend Maria (who also has arthritis and wants to keep her joints
moving) likes a video, doesn’t mean you will. Make sure that the individual
style of the instructor works for you.

What about
the music? In our classes and videos, we don’t use music. People work at a
different pace, some people have trouble with their hearing and find it
distracting, so we leave it out. Many love the fact that it’s quiet and they
can concentrate. Some play music at the same time, but it’s their own choice,
and I think that’s great.

Find
videos that you enjoy because you do need to feel comfortable with someone’s
style, with the approach, with the music, and with the setting. Because that’s
what’s going to keep you coming back.

When You Do Start

When you
find videos you want to follow, please start slowly and take it easy. If there
are various difficulty or challenge levels, start on the lowest one and build
up gradually. Even if it feels a bit easy, you could wake up the next day
aching! People tell us that the exercises we do are deceptively simple, and
they don’t expect to feel as ‘worked’ as they do.

If it is a
bit easy for you, you will build up quickly and that’ll be fine. But you won’t
overdo it or risk injuring yourself as a result of early enthusiasm.

Trust Yourself – You Are the Expert!

Finally,
trust your instincts and listen to your body. Even though you’re watching an
expert who is (hopefully) qualified, experienced, and trained to suggest
appropriate exercises, to demonstrate them carefully and give you good advice,
they are not in the room with you.

They don’t
know what it feels like in your joints or your back, and what’s exactly best
for you. So, you need to take a bit more time to get to know your body and how
it feels when you do different exercises.

Your
online instructor may be the expert in the exercises, but you are the expert in
you.

You will
feel more confident committing yourself to an exercise programme with the
knowledge that you know when to push yourself, when to ease off and what’s
right for you.

Check out The Vida Wellness Studio – an online exercise studio for people who want to exercise at home to improve their balance, feel stronger, and move more easily.

What
videos do you like doing at home, and why? How much research do you do before
committing to a program? Do you do home exercises in addition to a class?
Please join the conversation below.