When did you have your last good laugh? As we leave 2020 behind with all its tribulations, let’s ring in the new year with a bit of laughter.

For all cultures, laughing has been a way to make it through hard times. Last March, Sixty and Me published a great blog about laughing, “3 Fun Ways to Combat Coronavirus with Laughter.” As we begin 2021, I thought it was time to revisit the topic of laughter.

The Psychology Today article “Laughter is the Best Medicine” describes a plethora of research that demonstrates how laughter can reduce pain and improve the oxygen flow to your brain and heart. For people with diabetes, laughter has been found to increase glucose tolerance.

Upside Down World

Shared laughter can increase synchronization between the brains of speaker and listener. Humor also eases emotional pain. That is why people turn to humor in times like these. On New Year’s Eve, a friend sent me an email with the subject line “Goodbye 2020.” Have you heard any of these?

• I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
• The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house, and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
• Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money!

Funny Bone

Did you know that gorillas laugh? They like to be tickled. I guess that is what is meant by having a funny bone. There are many examples on YouTube. This laughing gorilla was my favorite because something that happened struck him or her as hilarious.

Children have a funny bone too. When I taught first grade, we always created a class joke book. They shared their favorite jokes like “What did one wave say to the other? The answer ‘Nothing, they just waved.’” Their sense of humor was so sweet.

Writing About Laughter

This week the theme in my writing group was laughter. The members each wrote stories about laughter in their lives. One woman shared the funny refrigerator magnets that she and her friend exchanged as gifts.

Another shared home-made comics, sent daily to her by a friend who is actually a software engineer. And yet another said that when she needed a laugh, she would open YouTube and watch the Funniest Home Videos.

The Laughing Record

When it was my turn to share, I wrote about a recent discovery I made when exploring family history. My Great Uncle Otto began OKEH records, named after himself, Otto K. E. Heinemann, in the early 1900s.

His record company became famous for releasing the Laughing Record, recorded in 1920, shortly after the end of World War I. It featured nothing but opera singers laughing along with a cornet solo. The record became an instant hit, selling over a million copies.

It was said to be a precursor to laugh tracks we hear on sitcoms. When I heard it on YouTube, I rolled my eyes as I usually do with laugh tracks. But as I listened, I could not stop myself from laughing. Listen here:

Daily Sources of Laughter

These days my daily dose of laughter comes from two places. First, my dogs are so funny when they compete to sit beside me on our couch. Mango, my little bulldog, known for being slow, uncharacteristically comes running to snuggle next to me.

That does not stop Pepe, the much bigger, high-energy pointer from trying to squeeze in without taking into consideration he is actually sitting on top of me. We make a pretty funny scene all squished together.

The other source of laughter is Anteo, my grandson who is now 9 months old. What is funnier than a baby? My daughter sends daily short videos with Anteo doing all sorts of hilarious baby acrobatics and laughing away.

Have you seen anything funny on TV or Netflix? Check out Sebastian Mansicalco’s standup routine about the impossible task of teaching his father how to use the “Internets” – over the phone. Sebastian commented: “It hasn’t gotten any better… When I call my dad now, he always says ‘I can’t see you’… I say, ‘Because I’m calling you…this is not FaceTime.’”

My own father had the propensity of telling the same jokes over and over. For my sister and me, the funny part was that we heard them repeated so many times.

I recently dug out a file folder labeled “jokes” that I found among my father’s things after he died last January. It had a collection of jokes he amassed over many years to share when he was speaking in public. He always personalized them. Here’s one:

Last week I sat moping in my office and my secretary Birdie said, “Cheer up. Things could get worse.” So I did. And sure enough, things got worse.

Let’s laugh our way out of 2020 and into 2021. What makes you laugh?

What is your favorite joke? Where do you look for laughter? Do you record funny stories or videos? Do you browse the web for things to laugh at? Please share what makes you laugh!

While there’s undoubtedly been a major cultural shift in the collective perception of mental health and treatment for psychiatric disorders, finding a therapist that you click with—whether you’re looking for cognitive behavioral therapy or emotion-focused therapy still isn’t exactly a seamless or judgment-proof process. As the growing effort to remove the stigma that’s shadowed the discourse surrounding mental and psychological health for ages continues to widen, teletherapy (therapy sessions conducted via phone calls, video conferences, and chat) has become increasingly available and desirable, thanks in part to more convenience and flexibility with appointments, along with the current social distancing measures in place due to the pandemic.

Aside from that, many patients simply feel more comfortable and relaxed during sessions when they’re in the comfort of their own home rather than a potentially intimidating clinical setting. As a side note, even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis under your belt, we have our ups and downs, and frankly, it’s just nice to have an outsider’s prescriptive—yes, your friends and family are not only trained professionals, but they can also be (lovingly) biased.

Even when you’ve finally taken the plunge and decided to give therapy a shot, finding the right therapist or mental health care provider can be a struggle—whether you’re looking for in-person or virtual care. Often times, it’s a grueling process of trial and error, and the first one or two candidates don’t quite feel like the best fit. This process can be pretty discouraging, and can often leave those in need exhausted (because no one wants to re-hash their life story again and again to new people before meeting “the one”) resulting in giving up in therapy altogether. In fact, it’s kind of like using dating apps—you give your new date the same “best version of yourself” shpeal as if you’re on a job interview, only to discover the chemistry is off, or you get ghosted and have to move onto the next match.

Fortunately, just like dating apps (and first-time dates held over a Zoom call), most online therapy platforms make choosing the right therapist for you, your lifestyle and concerns pretty easy by asking you a series of questions and taking intel on your personal preferences (i.e. which gender you prefer and what type of symptoms or experiences you’re looking to work on). Sure, it’s not a foolproof process, but you are able to choose between a few recommended professionals that meet your criteria. In my experience, there is absolutely nothing more isolating than suffering from a mental health episode and feeling as though you’re alone in the harrowing journey to simply feel like yourself again — let alone feel happy.

While medication is often a necessary part of treatment, talk therapy has really helped me identify common thought patterns (for me, they’re anxiety-fueled cognitive distortions) which has helped me become more self-aware and able to distinguish when it’s my anxiety (I like to think of “her” a separate entity rather than an imbalance of mood-modulating neurotransmitters in my brain) talking versus my logical mind. Of course, one common critique of telemental health is that the therapeutic benefits will be lesser than face-to-face sessions. While this will vary for each person, some studies have indicated that virtual therapy can be just as effective as in-person care.

Finally, although it sucks to say it, therapy can be downright expensive—especially if you don’t have insurance or government health care assistance. Ahead, we’ve outlined some online therapy resources for a variety of different budgets to help you get the care you need (and 100 percent deserve) without having to step foot in a daunting medical office.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

Courtesy of Talkspace.

Talkspace

Talkspace gives you access to thousands of licensed and background-checked professionals without having to leave the comfort of your own home. Depending on which medium you choose to use for your sessions (video, cat. call, etc) will dictate the pricing, but it starts at just $69 per month (prices vary depending on the service you select) if you want to give it a risk-free shot. The one advantage I found with TalkSpace is that I could vent via chat whether it was early morning or late night when a situation arose, rather than having to wait around to see my therapist at our set appointments on Friday. The ability to just type out the situation that had occurred and how I felt about it immediately (although you can’t expect an immediate response at midnight) was also helpful in and of itself.

Amwell.

Amwell

Regardless of whether you’re dealing with symptoms related to hormones (i.e. postpartum depression) or a lifelong battle with Bipolar disorder, Amwell is here to help. They have a huge network of licensed and experienced professionals trained to deal with not only hormonal-based “phases,” but also OCD, life transitions, PTSD, chronic insomnia, and even couple’s therapy.

Pride.

Pride Counseling

Specializing in specific LGBTQ+ concerns, Pride Counseling gives you access to trained doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to talk to remotely. Whether you’re struggling with the idea of coming out to your family or simply having relationship issues, Pride Counselling offers a forum of non-judgemental professionals to help you get through, and learn better coping mechanisms and communication skills along the way.

While there’s undoubtedly been a major cultural shift in the collective perception of mental health and treatment for psychiatric disorders, finding a therapist that you click with—whether you’re looking for cognitive behavioral therapy or emotion-focused therapy still isn’t exactly a seamless or judgment-proof process. As the growing effort to remove the stigma that’s shadowed the discourse surrounding mental and psychological health for ages continues to widen, teletherapy (therapy sessions conducted via phone calls, video conferences, and chat) has become increasingly available and desirable, thanks in part to more convenience and flexibility with appointments, along with the current social distancing measures in place due to the pandemic.

Aside from that, many patients simply feel more comfortable and relaxed during sessions when they’re in the comfort of their own home rather than a potentially intimidating clinical setting. As a side note, even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis under your belt, we have our ups and downs, and frankly, it’s just nice to have an outsider’s prescriptive—yes, your friends and family are not only trained professionals, but they can also be (lovingly) biased.

Even when you’ve finally taken the plunge and decided to give therapy a shot, finding the right therapist or mental health care provider can be a struggle—whether you’re looking for in-person or virtual care. Often times, it’s a grueling process of trial and error, and the first one or two candidates don’t quite feel like the best fit. This process can be pretty discouraging, and can often leave those in need exhausted (because no one wants to re-hash their life story again and again to new people before meeting “the one”) resulting in giving up in therapy altogether. In fact, it’s kind of like using dating apps—you give your new date the same “best version of yourself” shpeal as if you’re on a job interview, only to discover the chemistry is off, or you get ghosted and have to move onto the next match.

Fortunately, just like dating apps (and first-time dates held over a Zoom call), most online therapy platforms make choosing the right therapist for you, your lifestyle and concerns pretty easy by asking you a series of questions and taking intel on your personal preferences (i.e. which gender you prefer and what type of symptoms or experiences you’re looking to work on). Sure, it’s not a foolproof process, but you are able to choose between a few recommended professionals that meet your criteria. In my experience, there is absolutely nothing more isolating than suffering from a mental health episode and feeling as though you’re alone in the harrowing journey to simply feel like yourself again — let alone feel happy.

While medication is often a necessary part of treatment, talk therapy has really helped me identify common thought patterns (for me, they’re anxiety-fueled cognitive distortions) which has helped me become more self-aware and able to distinguish when it’s my anxiety (I like to think of “her” a separate entity rather than an imbalance of mood-modulating neurotransmitters in my brain) talking versus my logical mind. Of course, one common critique of telemental health is that the therapeutic benefits will be lesser than face-to-face sessions. While this will vary for each person, some studies have indicated that virtual therapy can be just as effective as in-person care.

Finally, although it sucks to say it, therapy can be downright expensive—especially if you don’t have insurance or government health care assistance. Ahead, we’ve outlined some online therapy resources for a variety of different budgets to help you get the care you need (and 100 percent deserve) without having to step foot in a daunting medical office.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

Courtesy of Talkspace.

Talkspace

Talkspace gives you access to thousands of licensed and background-checked professionals without having to leave the comfort of your own home. Depending on which medium you choose to use for your sessions (video, cat. call, etc) will dictate the pricing, but it starts at just $69 per month (prices vary depending on the service you select) if you want to give it a risk-free shot. The one advantage I found with TalkSpace is that I could vent via chat whether it was early morning or late night when a situation arose, rather than having to wait around to see my therapist at our set appointments on Friday. The ability to just type out the situation that had occurred and how I felt about it immediately (although you can’t expect an immediate response at midnight) was also helpful in and of itself.

Amwell.

Amwell

Regardless of whether you’re dealing with symptoms related to hormones (i.e. postpartum depression) or a lifelong battle with Bipolar disorder, Amwell is here to help. They have a huge network of licensed and experienced professionals trained to deal with not only hormonal-based “phases,” but also OCD, life transitions, PTSD, chronic insomnia, and even couple’s therapy.

Pride.

Pride Counseling

Specializing in specific LGBTQ+ concerns, Pride Counseling gives you access to trained doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to talk to remotely. Whether you’re struggling with the idea of coming out to your family or simply having relationship issues, Pride Counselling offers a forum of non-judgemental professionals to help you get through, and learn better coping mechanisms and communication skills along the way.

While there’s undoubtedly been a major cultural shift in the collective perception of mental health and treatment for psychiatric disorders, finding a therapist that you click with—whether you’re looking for cognitive behavioral therapy or emotion-focused therapy still isn’t exactly a seamless or judgment-proof process. As the growing effort to remove the stigma that’s shadowed the discourse surrounding mental and psychological health for ages continues to widen, teletherapy (therapy sessions conducted via phone calls, video conferences, and chat) has become increasingly available and desirable, thanks in part to more convenience and flexibility with appointments, along with the current social distancing measures in place due to the pandemic.

Aside from that, many patients simply feel more comfortable and relaxed during sessions when they’re in the comfort of their own home rather than a potentially intimidating clinical setting. As a side note, even if you don’t have a mental health diagnosis under your belt, we have our ups and downs, and frankly, it’s just nice to have an outsider’s prescriptive—yes, your friends and family are not only trained professionals, but they can also be (lovingly) biased.

Even when you’ve finally taken the plunge and decided to give therapy a shot, finding the right therapist or mental health care provider can be a struggle—whether you’re looking for in-person or virtual care. Often times, it’s a grueling process of trial and error, and the first one or two candidates don’t quite feel like the best fit. This process can be pretty discouraging, and can often leave those in need exhausted (because no one wants to re-hash their life story again and again to new people before meeting “the one”) resulting in giving up in therapy altogether. In fact, it’s kind of like using dating apps—you give your new date the same “best version of yourself” shpeal as if you’re on a job interview, only to discover the chemistry is off, or you get ghosted and have to move onto the next match.

Fortunately, just like dating apps (and first-time dates held over a Zoom call), most online therapy platforms make choosing the right therapist for you, your lifestyle and concerns pretty easy by asking you a series of questions and taking intel on your personal preferences (i.e. which gender you prefer and what type of symptoms or experiences you’re looking to work on). Sure, it’s not a foolproof process, but you are able to choose between a few recommended professionals that meet your criteria. In my experience, there is absolutely nothing more isolating than suffering from a mental health episode and feeling as though you’re alone in the harrowing journey to simply feel like yourself again — let alone feel happy.

While medication is often a necessary part of treatment, talk therapy has really helped me identify common thought patterns (for me, they’re anxiety-fueled cognitive distortions) which has helped me become more self-aware and able to distinguish when it’s my anxiety (I like to think of “her” a separate entity rather than an imbalance of mood-modulating neurotransmitters in my brain) talking versus my logical mind. Of course, one common critique of telemental health is that the therapeutic benefits will be lesser than face-to-face sessions. While this will vary for each person, some studies have indicated that virtual therapy can be just as effective as in-person care.

Finally, although it sucks to say it, therapy can be downright expensive—especially if you don’t have insurance or government health care assistance. Ahead, we’ve outlined some online therapy resources for a variety of different budgets to help you get the care you need (and 100 percent deserve) without having to step foot in a daunting medical office.

Our mission at STYLECASTER is to bring style to the people, and we only feature products we think you’ll love as much as we do. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.

Courtesy of Talkspace.

Talkspace

Talkspace gives you access to thousands of licensed and background-checked professionals without having to leave the comfort of your own home. Depending on which medium you choose to use for your sessions (video, cat. call, etc) will dictate the pricing, but it starts at just $69 per month (prices vary depending on the service you select) if you want to give it a risk-free shot. The one advantage I found with TalkSpace is that I could vent via chat whether it was early morning or late night when a situation arose, rather than having to wait around to see my therapist at our set appointments on Friday. The ability to just type out the situation that had occurred and how I felt about it immediately (although you can’t expect an immediate response at midnight) was also helpful in and of itself.

Amwell.

Amwell

Regardless of whether you’re dealing with symptoms related to hormones (i.e. postpartum depression) or a lifelong battle with Bipolar disorder, Amwell is here to help. They have a huge network of licensed and experienced professionals trained to deal with not only hormonal-based “phases,” but also OCD, life transitions, PTSD, chronic insomnia, and even couple’s therapy.

Pride.

Pride Counseling

Specializing in specific LGBTQ+ concerns, Pride Counseling gives you access to trained doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to talk to remotely. Whether you’re struggling with the idea of coming out to your family or simply having relationship issues, Pride Counselling offers a forum of non-judgemental professionals to help you get through, and learn better coping mechanisms and communication skills along the way.

When we refuse to judge others, we express love and compassion. Love does not mean we become passive and allow others to abuse us. It is quite the contrary.

Compassion is not weak but strong. It allows us to see where the suffering in the world arises. People can irritate us every day with their silly antics. We may think a compassionate heart means we are to ignore the irritations and allow others to walk all over us.

Some people do and say mean things, while others are coerced into remaining tolerant. One’s tolerance level can be commendable, but there lies the secret. Enduring a constant onslaught of trivial complaints leads one to resent the issues people complain about. This may happen when we judge in secrecy.

Convert Confrontations to Compromise

The revelation of private judgements took me by surprise one day. Outwardly, we keep most of our opinions to ourselves. We may join a discussion but attempt to remain neutral for the sake of keeping peace and refrain from hurting someone’s feelings.

There are times when our disagreements turn into a confrontation due to strong viewpoints. This allows one to stand firm in their convictions. However, it makes it difficult to bend. Blessed are those who can bend.

Beware When No One Listens

Some time ago, I began noticing that people behaved in an odd but similar fashion towards others. Whenever certain individual spoke, someone would quickly change the subject, wouldn’t look at the speaker or make eye contact, and would cut them off in mid-sentence.

The subject may have been interesting, but people stopped listening before the person was finished, and no one asked a question. I quickly realized we all irritate others in all kinds of ways but are not privy to how or when.

The more I investigate the theory, the more confirmation I have that my sentiments are accurate. We always think we are correct, and even if that is the case, no one wants to constantly be the student.

Shocking Revelations

When one believes they are fully courteous to others, respectful of their opinions and tolerant of their quirks, it makes this knowledge fraudulent. We can agree we all have imperfections, but we never consider how much those imperfections irritate others.

After getting over the shock, I considered the reasons and meaning of my observations. I concluded it was likely true that we all annoy others at times – with our behavior, our theories or even our desire to always be correct. After all, everyone wants the light to shine on them, occasionally.

Tolerance Is a Virtue

Our culture teaches us to tolerate others despite their differences. Yet, we are often intolerant of others in conversation.

The person who jumps in to speak before another is done is being impolite. The authoritative person may have statistics on their side to confirm the winning argument. No one questions these statistics, but they may not have all the facts.

There are people who wear you down with talk until you simply give up. The loud people always get their ideas across, and the impatient people are scary.

There are also those with bothersome habits – like tapping the table, or running a finger over the rim of a cup – that make one want to scream, “Stop!” You don’t say it, but you look away and take a deep breath.

Some people whine and complain about everything and anything. You may reach the point of exhaustion and want to go back home and go to bed. They may criticize you for speaking too slowly or not speaking fast enough to suit them.

Others dislike your vulnerability, openness or gentleness. You may wonder if they distrust you for your virtues. Tolerance is required from all sides and types of people.

When Conversing, Let Go of Control

Sometimes, people arrive with a negative attitude and you recognize it before they even open their mouth. It’s not difficult to discern, since they usually bear it in their expression. Others have an ache or pain that bothers them, but sometimes you just want to yell, “It is my turn to complain so be quiet.”

When you receive a compliment, respond with a thank you even if the outfit isn’t new. We all have the hardest life, the most difficult circumstances to endure and the saddest story to tell at various points in our lives. Some people find it difficult to be content or pleased. Lots of love and support is needed.

Strength Is Power

Most of us believe strength defines power and endurance. We don’t think of quiet suffering as endurance, and we almost dislike people for not complaining.

We tolerate other races and people from different economic groups, yet we frown upon our own siblings who appear to be proud of their accomplishments. The question is, why should people care about our possessions and accomplishments?

There are so many things we find exasperating; the list is endless. Most of these bothersome occurrences are never brought to light, and we must all be thankful for that.

You need to have the strength to speak up for the underdog and strength also to listen to another side of the argument. Strength helps us compromise and compromise gives us power.

Vulnerability Reflects Power

Admitting vulnerability and accepting our own weaknesses reflects our strength. Only a strong person has the power to expose their flaws without feeling threatened.

We are not superhuman and we all experience similar loves, hates and annoyances. Perhaps our pretenses ought to be removed and our defenses lowered.

None of us enjoy being made fun of or becoming the butt of the joke, and so we hang on to our pride to the point of exhaustion. It would be a relief to really become tolerant rather than live in the secretive resentment where we hide.

Honesty Controls Gossip

Leading a more open life stops some of the gossiping which frequently occurs behind our backs. By stopping our comparisons with others, we release a gentler life cycle free of competitions and jealousy.

Age, sex, economic status and other tools of assessment are not as important as the fact that pain and ache resonate with all of us.

When we say we are all in the same boat, nothing could be more honest. Most of us feign good fortune as well as the extent of suffering. Some exaggerate while others pretend they are invincible. In the end, the conclusion is clear: we are all defenseless when it comes to the sorrows of life.

Don’t Endure Life; Live It!

Undoubtedly, the ways we choose to endure life and those irritating quirks we pick up along the way, drive people undercover. Lifting the blanket of impatience, we discover an actual person who has feelings, loves, desires, sufferings, pains and opinions.

They are like us, and, usually, they can see our faults as well as their own. Human nature should cause us to pause and reflect on that annoying mother-in-law, daughter-in-law, sibling, parent, friend and even enemy.

It may happen, in some future season of our life, that we find ourselves making the same mistakes we find so annoying in others now. Reflection helps us find more reasons behind these situations.

We realize we are more alike than we are different when we stop seeing our failures as barriers that make us less acceptable, when we stop seeing a weakness as defeat – or helplessness as childish, defenselessness as failure, and susceptibility as deferment of our own abilities.

To be human is to be weak, helpless and defenseless, and at times, a failure. To be human is also to be strong and in control, powerful and the victor.

What we can’t allow ourselves to forget is that being human permits love, empathy, understanding and tolerance to become a part of a humane lifestyle. That is the essence of true tolerance.

How comfortable are you embracing your own flaws and weaknesses? Are you tolerant of other people or do you find yourself being critical and judgmental at times? Please share your thoughts below!